Our Children and Prayer - II

• Accompany your child to the mosque:
When your child is able to perform prayer as due, or even is able to
comprehend prayer before reaching the age of distinction, you should
accompany him to the mosque so as to perform congregational prayers.
This makes the child's heart attached to the greatest educational
institutions in the Muslim society, imbuing the childwith love for the
mosque. Thus, the parent should edify his child on the virtue of the
congregational prayer and that it is twenty-seven times better thanthe
prayers offered alone, and make him love the mosque by trying to
please him, for example,whenever you go to the mosque; you may take a
trip or go shopping before or after going tothe mosque.
Furthermore, the parent/father should tell some of his fellows in the
mosque that he will bring hischild that day so that they would warmly
welcome him and play with him and thus, the child would love coming to
the mosque and love the people there as well. Moreover, the
parent/father should steer away from accompanying his child to the
mosques that might estrangeor alienate him, such as constricted and
badly-ventilated ones where the temperature might get uncomfortably
high, ormosques where elderly people pray since they usually scold
young children [who might disturb them] during prayer, or the mosque
where the Imaam prolongs the prayers; because showing thoughtfulness
and consideration to children while performing prayers is of great
significance. In fact, it is a command of the Prophet as he said: "O
people, there are onesamong you who cause people to be averse (to come
to the mosque). If anyone of you leads the people in prayer, he should
shorten it for amongst them are the weak, the old and the one who has
a need (to fulfill)." In another narration with a different wording:
"…for amongst them are the old, the young and the sick..."
[Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]
The parent should then resort to the best means to accustom his child
to performing the congregational prayer imbuing him with love for it;
he might let the son lead his brothers, his mother, or his sisters in
some obligatory or voluntary prayers such as the Taraaweeh prayer
(offered during Ramadhaan). In fact, this would make the child feel
more respectable and well-balanced, would urge him toadhere to
performing the prayersand encourage him to be a betterperson.
• Fridays and 'Eid prayers:
The parent/father should accompany his child to the mosque to attend
the Friday and 'Eid prayer at an early age and teach him how to
perform Ghusl (ritual bath), even though he is not obliged to perform
it. He should also carry out other acts of worship that are due on
these occasions before the child such as: reciting Thikr
(remembrance), purification, applying perfume and dressing up to go to
prayers. Furthermore, the father should make the child feel the
significance of that special day; he might tell him, "We will be
attending a big celebration in which an honorable and respectable
scholar will deliver a speech, and then we will performthe prayers".
Hence, the child would be emotionally-charged, get used to seeing
large gatherings, and highly revere andvenerate the status of the
Imaamof the mosque within his heart; as he sees him advising a large
congregation and everyone listening attentively to his words.Thus, the
child would see in him a role model to be followed. Indeed, the father
should choose the suitable mosque where all these requirements are met
and the Friday Khutbah (sermon) is effective.
The above set of instructions and guidelines should be followed by the
parent or teacher in teaching the child to perform prayers untilthe
child adheres to performing due prayers heart and soul, and recognizes
prayer as the pillar of Islam; and accordingly, he would grow up to
revere and venerate ithighly.
Indeed, we do not wish to find this evil phenomenon of parents
neglecting teaching their childrento pray. We do not want to see the
father who adheres to due prayers in the mosque, while his children
and other members of his family are lax and negligent regarding
performing prayers, or even abandon it entirely. Undeniably, the
father would be held accountable on the Day of Resurrection: 'Why did
you not teach your child to pray? Why did you wait until he reached
that stage and abandoned performingprayers completely? Bear in
mind,dear parent, that Allaah The Exalted does not accept excuses
after warnings; Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {O you who have
believed, protect yourselves and your families froma Fire whose fuel
is people and stones.} [Quran 66:6]
Illuminated signs on the way:
1- Dear parent, you should take into account the differences between
children in terms of distinction and age.
2- It is better if the child performs the voluntary prayer
collectively with his parents at first and raises his voice a little
bit in prayer.
3- Some children may not be able to distinguish between the time when
prayer is due and when it ismissed; due to their inability to read the
time on the clock and know the prayer times. In that case, he should
be trained to hasten to prayer as soon as he hears the Athaan i.e.,
call for prayer, or he may be reminded ofeach prayer and should not be
punished or reproved for missinga prayer of which he was not reminded.
However, if he was reminded of a prayer but he ignored it out of
laziness or carelessness or because he was watching TV or playing and
thus, missed that prayer, he should be punished without excessive
harshness so that the child would not be stubborn or reject performing
prayer altogether.
Take 'Uqbah's precious advice:
Al-Jaahith reported that when 'Uqbah bin Abu Sufyaan assigned an
educator to discipline his son, he told him, "In order to rectify my
child, you should first rectify yourself; since students look up to
their educator and see through his own eyes. In fact, good for them is
whatever their educator sees good and bad is whatever he considers to
be bad.
Furthermore, you should teach them the biographies of wise people who
had refined manners.Moreover, you may threaten him and discipline him
without asking for my permission. You should be their doctor who does
not hasten to prescribe the medication until he knows the disease duly
and thoroughly, and do not expect so much from me as a parent; for I
have counted onyou to parent my son." - - ▓███▓ Translator:->
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