Pilgrimage, & Dought & clear, - * What must be done by one who spoils ‘Umrah by having intercourse

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I live in Saudi and my wife came from outside Saudi. We met in Jeddah when we were in ihram for ‘Umrah only, and we went to Makkah. In the hotel intercourse took place before ‘Umrah, then we went to at-Tan‘eem and entered ihram, and we did a new ‘Umrah. What is the ruling?.
Praise be to Allaah.
It is not permissible for one who is in ihram for Hajj or ‘Umrah to have intercourse until he or she has exited ihram. If a person has intercourse during ‘Umrah, before completing saa‘i, the ‘Umrah is invalidated, but he has to carry on and complete it, then make it up by entering ihram from the place he entered it the first time, as well as sacrificing a sheep on behalf of each of you, to be slaughtered in Makkah and its meat distributed to the poor (of that city).
With regard to intercourse after saa‘i and before shaving the head or cutting the hair, it does not invalidate ‘Umrah, but fidyah (ransom or expiation) must be offered for that, with a choice (between offering a sacrifice, fasting for three days or feeding six poor persons).
Your going to at-Tan‘eem was of no use, because you are still in a state of ihram for ‘umrah -- even if it was spoiled -- so it is not correct to enter another ihram until you are done with the first one.
Based on that, what you did of the actions of ‘Umrah is regarded as the completion of the spoiled ‘Umrah, and you have to make it up. You should enter ihram from the miqeet from which you entered ihram the first time, and slaughter a sheep on behalf of each of you.
Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him) said: If you have intercourse with your wife, it invalidates your ‘Umrah, but you have to complete it, then make it up again from the place at which you entered ihram the first time. And you have to offer a sacrifice, which is a one-ear-old sheep or a two-year-old goat, to slaughtered in Makkah and given to the poor. One seventh of a camel or cow is also acceptable.
End quote fromFataawa Islamiyyah.
Some scholars are of the view that what is required of one who has intercourse during ‘Umrah is to offer fidyah, with a choice between offering a sacrifice, fasting for three days or feeding six poor persons, whether he had intercourse before saa‘i or after, as it says inSharh Muntaha al-Iraadaat, 1/556.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said: ‘Umrah in which intercourse takes place is an invalid ‘Umrah and you have to sacrifice a sheep, to be slaughtered in Makkah and the meat distributed to the poor; or feed six poor persons, giving each one half a saa‘ of food; or fast for three days. You also have to do another ‘Umrah to make up for the one that was spoiled. End quote fromal-Liqa’ ash-Shahri, 9/54
To sum up, you have to do three things:
1. Repent to Allah, may He be exalted, for doing something that was forbidden whilst in ihram and spoiling the rituals which Allah commanded must be completed.
2. Do ‘Umrah again to make up for the spoiled ‘Umrah; you have to enter ihram from the same miqaat as you entered ihram for the ‘Umrah that was spoiled.
3. Offer a fidyah (ransom); each of you has the option of choosing whichever option he or she wants: either sacrificing a sheep, or fasting three days, or feeding six poor people among the poor of Makkah. If each of you sacrifices a sheep, that is preferable and is more on the safe side.
And Allah knows best.

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Pilgrimage, & Dought & clear, - * After performing Hajj, is the Muslim guaranteed forgiveness of his sins or should he still feel worried and anxious?

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There is a hadith that states if you make haj properly its as if youve returned sinless as a child( loose translation) and alhamdulillah i have made hajj and inshallah it was proper, but from time to time during my prayer i remember a sin i have made before haj and i feel tremendous remorse and i ask for forgiveness. should i be so remorseful or should i be more hopeful that i have forgiven and not try to remember my sins.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) say: “Whoever performs Hajj for the sake of Allah and does not utter any obscene speech or do any evil deed, will go back (free of sin) as his mother bore him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1449; Muslim, 1350.
Here we should draw attention to two things:
1.
That this is the reward for an accepted Hajj. Whoever does Hajj using haraam money, or whose Hajj is not sincerely for the sake of Allah, may He be exalted, or who utters any obscene speech or does any evil deeds, his Hajj will not be accepted and he will not go back as on the day his mother bore him.
Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
With regard to the accepted Hajj, it was said that it is that in which there is no showing off or seeking reputation, and in which there is no obscene speech or evil deeds, and it is done with halaal wealth.
Al-Tamheed lima fi’l-Muwatta’ min al-Ma‘aani wa’l-Asaaneed, 22/39
Some of the scholars said that theHajj mabrooris that which is accepted, and the sign of its acceptance is that the person does not go back to disobeying his Lord, may He be exalted, and that he restores rights to those who are entitled to them.
See the answer to question no. 26242
2.
Hajj does not mean that obligations such as expiation (kafaarah) and debts are waived, as has been explained previously in the answer to question no. 138630
Secondly:
The Muslim whom his Lord, may He be exalted, honours by enabling him to perform the rituals of Hajj should be concerned lest his Hajj has not been accepted from him. This does not mean that he should despair of his Lord’s mercy; rather it is so that he will not take it for granted, and so that he will turn to his Lord, may He be exalted, with sincere du‘aa’, asking that it be accepted from him, and so that he will focus on doing righteous deeds that will increase his balance of good deeds on the Day when he meets his Lord, may He be exalted. Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, says, describing the believers (interpretation of the meaning):
“and those who give (their wealth and other possession) whatever they gave, in a state that their hearts are overwhelmed (with the belief) that they are to be those who return to their Nourisher-Sustainer —
It is these who race for the good deeds, and they are foremost in them (e.g. offering the compulsory Salat (prayers) in their (early) stated, fixed times and so on)”
[al-Mu’minoon 23:60-61].
It was narrated that ‘Aa’isha, the wife of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: I asked the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) about this verse:“and those who give (their wealth and other possession) whatever they gave, in a state that their hearts are overwhelmed” [al-Mu’minoon 23:60]. ‘Aa’ishah said: Are they those who drink alcohol and steal? He said: No, O daughter of as-Siddeeq; rather they are those who fast, pray and give charity, fearing that it will not be accepted from them. Those are the ones who race for the good deeds.
Narrated by at-Tirmidhi, 3175; Ibn Maajah, 4198; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh at-Tirmidhi
This fear of these believers does not make them despair of the mercy of their Lord; rather they combine with it hope and positive thinking of their Lord, may He be glorified and exalted, the hope that He will reward them and honour them. Two things motivate those believing close friends of Allah to fear lest their good deeds not be accepted: thinking negatively of themselves lest they have not done well, and their great love for their Lord, may He be glorified and exalted.
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
If he – i.e. the believer – is afraid, then it is more appropriate for him to fear that he is not doing good enough and what makes him feel that he is not doing good enough is two things:
(i) Seeing his failings and shortcomings
(ii) The sincerity of his love (for Allah), for the one who loves sincerely draws close to his Beloved as much as he can, whilst feeling that he is not doing enough and that he is too embarrassed to meet Him with his deeds when he feels that He deserves much more.
Madaarij as-Saalikeen, 2/325
To sum up:
What you have to do is combine two things and do not omit either of them:
1.
Do not think of your sins as being too great in comparison to the forgiveness and mercy of Allah, may He be exalted. Rather what the believer fears is his shortcomings in repentance and his shortcomings in doing acts of obedience that expiate sins. So let this fear of yours motivate you to do more acts of worship and to ask Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, sincerely to accept your deeds and make you among those who are close to Him. Beware of despairing of the mercy of your Lord, may He be glorified and exalted.
2.
Think positively of Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, and hope for His forgiveness, blessing, kindness and mercy that encompasses all things. So long as you persist in obeying your Lord’s commands, respecting His laws and hastening to obey Him, you should also persist in thinking positively of Him and that He will accept it from you and make you steadfast in doing so.
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allah have mercy on him) said, commenting on the hadeeth qudsi, “Allah, may He be exalted, says: ‘I am as My slave thinks I am’” (agreed upon):
Al-Qurtubi said inal-Mufhim: It was said that what is meant by “as My slave thinks I am” is thinking that one will receive a response when offering du‘aa’ (supplication), and thinking that it will be accepted when one repents, and thinking that one will be forgiven when asking for forgiveness, and thinking that one will be rewarded when doing acts of worship, fulfilling all their conditions and believing sincerely in His promise. He said: that is supported by what he said in another hadeeth: “Call upon Allah when you are certain of receiving a response.” Hence one should strive hard in praying qiyaam with the certainty that Allah will accept it and forgive one, because He has promised that and He does not break His promises. If he believes or thinks that Allah will not accept it and that it is of no benefit, this is despairing of the mercy of Allah, which is a major sin. If a person dies in such a state, he will be left to what he thought, as it says in some narrations of the hadeeth quoted above: “Let My slave think of Me as he wishes.” As for thinking that one will be forgiven whilst persisting in sin, that is pure ignorance and delusion, and leads to the view of theMurji’ah.
Fath al-Baari, 13/386
We ask Allah to accept your righteous deeds from you, and to make your Hajj accepted, and to grant you the best and greatest reward.
And Allah knows best.

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Pilgrimage, & Dought & clear, - * He wants to do Hajj first and his father wants him to get married first

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Will I be disobeying my father because of the following?
1. My father (may Allah have mercy on him) wanted me to start looking to get married, but I refused because I wanted to complete my postgraduate studies.
2. The money that I saved was sufficient to get married (the marriage contract only). Please note that I have a job.
3. Then I was not able to travel in order to complete my postgraduate studies, so I decided to start a small business in the hope that I could earn some money with which to do Hajj. This project was a partnership between me and him; it was a piece of land (the price of which was not enough to do Hajj). We were planning to change the house in which we live because of the annoyance caused by the neighbours, may Allah guide them.
4. My father refused to do Hajj with this money because he said that it was my money, not his.
5. After a discussion which did not lead anywhere, I said: I am going to do Hajj, but he told me to get married first.
6. Now – after he died in Ramadan – they are asking me to do what he wanted me to do, but I am telling them that I want to do Hajj first.
7. The land is now yielding enough money to perform the obligatory Hajj; he and I paid off the debt (the price of the land) before he died.
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
Hajj is obligatory and should be done at the earliest opportunity according to the more correct of the two scholarly opinions. This has been discussed in the answer to question no. 41702.
If the available money is sufficient for either doing Hajj or getting married, then precedence should be given to marriage if there is a need for that and there is the fear of falling into haraam. If there is no (urgent) need for marriage, then Hajj should be given precedence.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said inal-Mughni(5/12): If (the individual) needs to get married and fears that he may encounter hardship, then he should give precedence to marriage, because it is obligatory in his case and he cannot do without it, so it is like spending on his maintenance. If there is no such fear, he should give precedence to Hajj, because marriage is voluntary and should not be given precedence over the obligatory Hajj. End quote.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked: Is it permissible to delay Hajj until after getting married for one who is able to do it? That is because of what the youth are facing nowadays of temptation, both great and small.
He replied:
There is no doubt that marriage, for one who has the desire and urgent need for it, takes precedence over Hajj, because if an individual has overwhelming desire, in that case marriage becomes one of the necessities of life, like eating and drinking. Hence it is permissible for one who needs to get married and does not have any money to be given zakaah funds with which to get married, just as the poor person may be given food to suffice him and clothes with which to cover his ‘awrah out of the zakaah funds.
Based on that, we say: if he needs to get married, then he should give marriage precedence over Hajj, because Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, stipulated that in order for Hajj to be obligatory, one must be able to do it, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And Hajj (pilgrimage to Makkah) to the House (Ka‘bah) is a duty that mankind owes to Allah, those who can afford the expenses (for one’s conveyance, provision and residence)”
[Aal ‘Imraan 3:97].
In the case of one who is young and it does not matter for him whether he gets married this year or next year, then he should give precedence to Hajj because it is not necessary for him to give precedence to marriage.
End quote fromFataawa Manaar al-Islam, 2/375
Based on that, if you do not have any fears (of falling into haraam) if you delay marriage, then you should hasten to do Hajj first, and Allah will compensate you with good, because Hajj is one of the important obligatory duties and rituals of Islam.
You do not have to carry out your father’s wishes with regard to this matter, either during his lifetime or after his death, because that would result in your delaying Hajj when there is no need to do so.
Secondly:
You should have tried to please your father by giving precedence to marriage over completing your postgraduate studies. It was narrated from Imam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) that marriage is obligatory if either of the parents tell you to get married.
Al-Mirdaawi said: Is it (marriage) obligatory if the parents, or one of them, tell the son to get married? Imam Ahmad (may Allah have mercy on him) said: If he has parents who are telling him to get married, then I tell him to get married. Or if he is a young man who fears that he may commit sin, I tell him to get married.
By saying this, he made the parents’ instructions to get married equivalent to fearing that one may commit sin.
End quote fromal-Insaaf, 8/14
Thirdly:
There is nothing wrong with a father doing Hajj with his son’s wealth; in fact there is nothing wrong with a person doing Hajj with another person’s wealth in general. But if a person was not able to do the obligatory Hajj because he could not afford the expenses, then he became able to afford it if someone else pays for it, does he have to accept this money in order to do Hajj? There is a difference of opinion among the fuqaha’ concerning that.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: He is not obliged to do Hajj if someone else spends on it, and he does not become able to do it thereby (and thus it does not become obligatory for him), whether the one who gives him the money is a relative or otherwise, and whether he gives him a means of transportation and provisions, or he gives him money. However, it was narrated from ash-Shaafa‘i that if a person’s son gives him money that enables him to do Hajj, then he is obliged to do it, because he has enabled him to do Hajj without feeling that he owes a favour to anyone, and no harm or annoyance will result from that. Therefore he is obliged to do Hajj, as would be the case if he possessed sufficient provisions and a mount.
In our view, the words of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) make Hajj binding on one who has a means of transportation and sufficient funds to cover the costs of the journey. However, in the case where someone else offers to over these costs, he is not regarded as having the means or the money to obtain the means, so Hajj is not obligatory for him. The same applies if his father offers to help him, because we do not think that the father will not feel that he owes him a favour in this case.
End quote fromal-Mughni, 3/87
To sum up: it is obligatory for you to hasten to do Hajj, so long as you do not think that you will fall into haraam as a result of delaying marriage, and you should ask Allah, may He be exalted, for forgiveness for having gone against your father’s instructions when he told you to get married first.
We ask Allah to help and guide you.
And Allah knows best.

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