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Friday, July 12, 2013

Dought & clear - She is asking aboutsome things that some people has become accustomed to doing in wedding parties.

-What is the ruling on the bunch of flowers that the bride holds?
-What is the ruling on the couple drinking juice in the wedding party?
-What is the ruling on cutting the cake of wedding party?
-What is the ruling on wearing rings for both bride and groom?
All the above mentioned things became part of the society's habits and
traditions.
Praise be to Allaah.
Islam encourages the husband to treat his wife well and to be kind to
her, especially when he enters upon her, so asto dispel any discomfort
that she may feel. Hence he is to give the virgin seven days if he
takes her as a second wife, and to give the previously-married woman
three days. He is to give (the new wife) these days before he begins
to divide his timebetween her and his other wives. All of that is
aimed as dispelling discomfort between the spouses. On the
weddingnight, Islam enjoins certain etiquette to achieve this purpose,
which includes treating the wife kindly by offering her something to
drink and the like. The great scholar al-Albaani (may Allaah have
mercy on him) said inAdaab al-Zafaaf: It is mustahabb when he enters
upon his wife to treat her kindly by offering her something to drink
and the like, because of the hadeeth of Asma' bint Yazeed who said: I
adorned 'Aa'ishah for the Messenger of Allaah(peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him), then I went to him and invited him to look at
her, and he came and satbeside her. A large vesselof milk was brought
andhe drank some then the Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) passed it to her and she lowered herhead and felt shy. Asma'
said: I rebuked her and said to her: Take (it) from the hand of the
Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). She said: So she
took it and drank a little, then the Prophet(peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) saidto her: "Give to your friend." End quote.
But what is done nowadays in wedding parties, where the husband enters
upon hisbride in the wedding party when she is with women who are not
mahrams of the husband, and he enters with all his finery and the
women are also fullyadorned, and he looks atthem and they look at him,
all of that is haraamand should be denounced. This was stated in a
fatwa by the Standing Committee for Academic Research and Issuing
Fatwas when they said: For the husband to appear on the dais beside
his wife in front of women who are not his mahrams andwho are
attending the wedding party, when hesees them and they see him, and
they are all fully adorned and wearing their best is notpermissible,
rather it is an evil which must be denounced. End quote fromFataawa
al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah li'l-Ifta'(19/120).
If what is mentioned in the question happens in the party in this
manner,then these are evils which must be avoided and warned against.
Butif that happens away from where non-mahrams can see it, then there
is nothing wrong with it in sha Allaah. But it is not permissible for
the brideor groom to wear a ring,because this is a custom that has
come to the Muslims (from others), sodoing it is an imitation of the
kaafirs. That may also be accompanied by a belief that it creates love
between the couple, and that belief isa kind of minor shirk. In
addition to that, what the man wears may be made of gold, and that
isharaam for him. We have discussed that in detail in the answer to
question no. 21441, q.v.
As for holding the hand of the bride, if what is meant is the husband
taking his wife's hand when she is holding a bunch of flowers, that is
permissible, as is also thecase if what is meant is the bride holding
a bunch of flowers in her hand during the party.
Doing the haraam thingsthat we have mentionedcannot be justified by
saying that they have become customary among some people in our
society, rather what we must do is enjoin what is good and forbid what
is evil, and combat the foreign customs that are haraam according
toour sharee'ah.
And Allaah knows best.

Dought & clear - He asking about the proper Islamic way to celebrate weddings.

What do suggest regarding an Islamic wedding party? I do notwant any
sin to be committed in this party, i.e. music, etc. but of course we
want it to be delightful, we do not want the guests to feel bored.
Praise be to Allaah.
Celebrating weddings is a celebration that is prescribed in sharee'ah,
because it is a great blessing from Allaah, Who has enabled the couple
to find a means of happiness and a way to achieve modesty and
chastity. People have always expressed their joy for this blessing
sinceancient times and they still do so today, and that takes various
forms and involves different customs in different societies and
countries.
The aim of Islamic sharee'ah is not to put pressure on people with
regard to their customs or try to make them follow only one custom,
rather studying sharee'ah will show that with regard to customs the
matter is broad in scope and in principle customs are permissible,
with some limits and guidelines.
The Muslim is recommended to follow the customs of his people and he
is forbidden to go against them, so long as they do not go against the
rulings of sharee'ah or cause any hardship or embarrassment to people.
The scholars ruled that it is recommended to be similar to the people
in their customs by analogywith the ruling that it is recommended to
be similar to them in dress. There is a hadeeth concerning that which
forbids being different from people in dress so that one becomes known
among people for the way he dresses. Itwas narrated that Ibn 'Umar
(may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah(peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever wears a garment of
fame and vanity, Allaah will clothe him in a garment of humiliation on
the Day of Resurrection."
Narrated by Ibn Majaah (3606); classed as hasan by Shaykh al-Albaani
inSaheeh Ibn Majaah.
Fame and vanity in clothing means wearing something that is
extraordinarily expensive or extraordinarily ragged. The salaf
disliked both kinds of standing out: wearing expensive clothing or
wearing ragged clothing.
It says something similar inMajmoo' al-Fataawaby Ibn Taymiyah (22/138).
Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said inal-Sharh
al-Mumti'(6/115):
We must highlight this point, that going along with customs so long
as they are not haraam is the Sunnah, because going against customs is
a kind of vanity, and the Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) forbade the dress of fame and vanity,so that which goes
against customs is also forbidden. End quote.
Hence we advise you to hold a wedding celebration and we ask Allaah to
bless it. You should do it in accordance with the custom and tradition
of people in your country, and you should not try to cast off all of
their customs. All that you have to do is reject and avoid those
customs thatare haraam, such as using music – apart fromthe daff – and
mixing between men and women. For more information please see question
no. 11446.
There are many more things that are permissible – praise be to Allaah
– than those that are haraam. Singingthat is not accompanied by music,
making food, bringing people together, wearing adornments are all
things that are permitted by sharee'ah, so use whatever of thosethings
you think is appropriate and that people like and ask Allaah to guide
you in allof that.
And Allaah knows best.

Persistence, Determination and Hard Work in Islam - Never Give Up(Perseverance in Islam)

Sakkaki was a skilled artist an artisan. With great expertise and
interest, he made such a nice and beautiful inkpotthat it could be
presented to the king. Heexpected that, appreciating his artistic
skill, the king would encourage him as far as possible. So, with
countless hopes and thousand of desires, he presented that inkpot to
the king. In the beginning the king was very impressed by his artistic
skill but afterwards an unpleasantevent occurred that caused an
extraordinary change in Sakkaki's life and way of thinking.
When the king was observing the skilled artistry of the beautiful
inkpot and Sakkaki was lost in the world of thoughts, the people
informed that a scholar-literary person or jury is about to enter the
court. As soon as the scholar entered, the king got so much absorbed
in welcoming and talking tohim that he forgot Sakkaki and his skilled
artistry. This incident caused an adverse and deep effect on the heart
of Sakkaki.
Sakkaki realized that now he would not receive the encouragement he
had expected and all his desires and hopes are useless now. But
Sakkaki's high spirited mind did not allow him to be in peace, so he
started thinking as to what should he do. He decided to do what the
others have done and go on the same way that theothers have gone
(until now). Therefore, he decided to search for his lost hopes in the
world ofknowledge, literature and books. Although for a wise man who
has passed the days of his young age, it was not easy to study with
young children and to start right from the preliminary stage. But he
did not have a choice. After all whenever the fish is taken out of
water,it is fresh.
Worse than that, in the beginning he did not find any sort of interest
in himself regarding reading and writing. Perhaps spending a long time
in artistic works andhandicraft was the reason for stagnancy in his
scientific and literary talent. But neither his advanced age nor lack
of capability, none of these could change his decision. With great
enthusiasm and zeal for attaining knowledge, he strictly got busy with
his studies, until another incident occurred:
The teacher who was teaching him Shafi'i jurisprudence (fiqh Shafi'i),
taught him this lesson: "The teacher believes that the skin of adog
becomes clean (tahir) after tanning." Sakkaki repeated this sentence a
lot of times so that at the time of examination he should be able to
succeed. But when he was asked to answer this question, he said: "The
dog believes that the skin of a teacher becomes clean after tanning."
The audience upon hearing this answer started laughing. It was clear
for everybody that this old man is absolutely incapable of reading
andwriting. After this incident Sakkaki not onlyleft the school, but
he leftthe town and went towards the jungle. By chance, he reached the
foot of a mountain, where he saw that the water is falling drop by
drop from the top and due to the continuous falling of water, a hole
had been formed in that hard stone. He reflected for sometime, a good
idea crossed his mind likelightning. And he said:"Maybe my heart is
not ready to accept (knowledge) but it is not harder than this stone.
It is impossible that continuous studying withpersistence,
determination and hard work would be ineffective."
Therefore, he came back and with hard work, he got busy in the
attainment of knowledge. As a result hewas reckoned as one of the
popular scholars of his time.
Imam Ali (a.s.) Says:"Books are the gardens oflearned." and "The man
of learning is alive even after his death. The man of ignorance is
dead even while he is alive."

Perseverance, Persistenceand Determination in Islam - Never Give Up(Perseverance in Islam)

A man woke up early in order to pray the Fajr (Morning) prayer in the
Masjid (Mosque). He got dressed, made his Wudhu(ablution) and was on
hisway to the Masjid.
On his way to the Masjid, the man fell and his clothes got dirty. He
got up, brushed himself off, and headed back home. At home, he changed
his clothes, made his ablution, and was, again,on his way to the
Masjid. On his way to the Masjid, he fell again and at the same spot!
He, again, got up, brushed himself off and headed home. At home he,
once again, changed his clothes, made his ablution and was on his way
to the Masjid.
On his way to the Masjid, he met a man holding a lamp. He asked the
man of his identity and the man replied "I saw you fall twice on your
way to the Masjid, so I brought alamp so I can light your way." The
first man thanked him profoundly and the two were on their way to the
Masjid.
Once at the Masjid, the first man asked the man with the lamp to come
in and pray Fajr with him. The second man refused. The first man asked
him acouple more times and, again, the answer was the same. The first
man asked him why he did not wish to come in and pray.
The man replied "I am Shaitan (Satan)." The man was shocked at this
reply. Shaitan (Satan) went on to explain, "I saw you on your way to
the Masjid and it was I who made you fall. Whenyou went home, cleaned
yourself and went back on your way to the Masjid, Allah (SWT) forgave
all of your sins. I made you fall a second time, and even that did not
encourage you to stay home, but rather, you went back on your way to
the Masjid. Because of that, Allah (SWT) forgave all the sins of the
people of your household. I was afraid ifI made you fall one more
time, then Allah (SWT) will forgive the sins of the people of your
village, so I made sure that you reached the Masjid safely."
Moral:Do not let Shaitan (Satan) benefit from his actions. Do not put
off a good that you intended to do as you never know how much reward
you might receive from the hardships you encounter while trying to
achieve that good.