Dought & clear, - Can we do what wewant?.

I have some questions about Islam, could you explain them for me? Are
all of man's actions, such as birth, death, his day-to-day behaviour,
and all that he thinks about doing decreed by Allaah? Is our life
programmed by Allaah before we are born? Or do we have freedom of
choice and can we decide and do whatever we want, without that being
controlled by Allaah? In brief, do we do whatever we want or what
Allaah has created us to do?.
Praise be to Allaah.
It should be noted that some of our circumstances are forced on us,
and and we have no choice in it, such as the day when a person is
born, the colour of his skin and eyes, and when he will die. All of
these are matters over which people have no control, rather they
happen to them by force. Given that these are matters in which people
have no choice, they do not have anything to do with Paradise or Hell,
torment or blessing.
But some actions are the subject of choice, such as whether to believe
or disbelieve, or worldly matters such as choosing what to eat or
drink, and where to live.
There is nothing of that nature which is entirely outside the will and
decree of Allaah.
But how does that happen?
Belief in al-qadar (the divine will and decree) is one of the pillars
of faith. The Muslim's faith cannot be valid unless he accepts that
everything comes from Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the
meaning):
"Verily, We have created all things with Qadar (Divine Preordainments
of all things before their creation as written in the Book of
DecreesAl-Lawh Al-Mahfooz)"
[al-Qamar 54:49]
Indeed, the names of Allaah include al-Qaadir, al-Qadeer and
al-Muqtadir (which refer to His being All-Powerful).
The heart of the matter is that Allaah possesses the attributes of
knowledge, power and will.
Based on that, if people who do deeds want to do them, whether they
are sins or acts of obedience, then Allaah inevitably knows that,
indeed He knew that in eternity past, before He even created the
universe.
Then after He knew it, He wrote it with Him, then when they wanted to
do it, He willed that they should do so. If He did not will that, then
they would not do it. He is All-Powerful, and He is the Creator of
people's deeds because He is the Creator of the human beings who do
them.
So all the deeds of mankind are written with Allaah, because Allaah
has prior knowledge of them. This does not mean that Allaah compels
people to do what they do, rather they have freedom of choice with
regard to their deeds. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"Verily, We showed him the way, whether he be grateful or ungrateful"
[al-Insaan 76:3]
But their actions are not compelled by Allaah, for Allaah does not
force His slaves to do anything.
Imaam Ibn Abi'l-'Izz al-Hanafi said concerning a similar matter:
If it is said, How can Allaah will something that He is not pleased
with and does not like? How can He will it and create it? How can His
will be reconciled with His hatred for it?
It should be said (in response) that this is the question which has
caused divisions among the people and has caused them to follow
different paths and opinions.
It should be noted that what is willed may be of two types: that which
is willed or wanted for itself, and that which is willed or wanted for
something else.
That which is willed or wanted for itself is that which is wanted and
loved for what it is and for the goodness it contains. So it comes
under the heading of aims and goals. That which is willed or wanted
for something else may not be what is wanted, but it serves a purpose;
it may not serve any purpose in and of itself, even though it may be a
means to attain that which he wants and is aiming for. So it may be
something that is disliked in and of itself, but he may seek it
because it serves a purpose and helps him reach what he wants. So in
this case he will have two opposing feelings, his dislike (of the
means) and his desire (for the end). There is no contradiction, as
these feelings are related to different things. This is like
unpleasant medicine which the one who takes it knows will cure him, or
like cutting off a wasted limb when he knows that will save the rest
of his body, or travelling a difficult route when he knows that it
will bring him to what he wants and loves. The wise man would rather
accept the disliked thing on the basis that he is likely to get good
results even though the ultimate end may not be quite certain. So how
about Allaah, from Whom nothing is hidden? He may dislike something
but it may not be against His will for it to exist, because it may be
a means to an end, and it may be a means to something that Allaah
likes. For example, Allaah created Iblees, who is the cause of the
corruption of religions, deeds, beliefs and human wills; but
nevertheless he is a means to a lot of things that Allaah likes, which
result from the creation of Iblees. For these things to exist is
dearer to Allaah than if they did not exist at all.

For children, - Make a difference: Teacher Mrs. Thompson and Teddy Stallard

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of
school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she
looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same.
However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped
in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stallard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he
did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy
and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be
unpleasant.
It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in
marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then
putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.
At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review
each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However,
when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.
Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a
ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners; he is a joy
to be around."
Teddy's second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student,
well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother
has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."
Teddy's third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard
on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much
interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't
taken."
Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't
show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he
sometimes sleeps in class."
By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of
herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas
presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for
Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper
that he got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in
the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to
laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones
missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume. But she
stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the
bracelet was, putting it on and dabbing some of the perfume on her
wrist.
Teddy Stallard stayed after school that day just long enough to say,
"Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the
children left, she cried for at least an hour.
On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic.
Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular
attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come
alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the
end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the
class and despite her lie that she would love all the children the
same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets."
A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her
that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.
Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then
wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she
was still the best teacher he ever had in life.
Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while
things had been tough at times, he would stayed in school, had stuck
with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of
honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and
favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.
Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he
explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a
little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and
favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer....
The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stallard, MD.
The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter
that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be
married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago
and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the
wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the
groom.
Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet,
the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she
was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on
their last Christmas together.
They hugged each other and Dr. Stallard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's
ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much
for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a
difference."
Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said,
"Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I
could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
You can never tell what type of impact you may have on someone's life
by your actions or lack of action. Please consider this fact in your
venture through life, and just try to make a difference in someone
else's life today. Believe in Angels, and then return the favor by
being someone's Angel.
No work is insignificant. All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity
and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence. -
Martin Luther King, Jr.
What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the
world is and remains immortal.

For children, - Moral stories about making a difference (Starfish Story)

We are by nature moral story tellers. Our brains are wired to tell
moral stories.
Think for a moment about how many moral stories you have already told
today: to your spouse or partner; to your children; to your
colleagues; or to your friends. Moral stories are the currency of our
lives; they are the measure of our days. We are nothing without our
moral stories, because moral stories encapsulate our fears, our
failures, our dreams, and our desires. We understand and make sense of
our own lives by telling moral stories about ourselves and others.
Moral stories are the touchstones for our emotions.
Moral stories have a way to connect and stay with us like nothing else
ever could. They tap into our inner feelings and make us part of it.
The reason why we remember moral stories is because they pull on our
emotional strings. They make us think and they make us feel. And it's
that feeling that helps us remember.
A moral story, not data or facts, shake us up and make us see other
points of view through characters we can identify with. And if a story
is really captivating, we continue to think about it, turning it over
in our minds, savoring it. Maybe we even begin to think about things a
little differently from the way we had thought about them before.
Moral stories have the power to move us emotionally; stir us
intellectually; and teach us, too.
The following moral stories about making a difference will never fail
to inspire us, regardless of how insignificant it may seem in the eyes
of others.
Once upon a time, while walking along a beach, an elderly wise man saw
someone in the distance leaning down, picking something up and
throwing it into the ocean.
As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young boy,
picking up starfish one by one and tossing each one gently back into
the water.
Elderly wise man came closer still and called out, "Good morning! May
I ask what it is that you are doing?"
The young boy paused, looked up and replied, "Throwing starfish back
into the ocean."
The elderly wise man smiled and said, "I must ask then, why are you
throwing starfish back into the ocean?"
To this, the young boy replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going
out. If I don't throw them in, they will die."
Upon hearing this, the elderly wise man commented, "But, young boy, do
you not realise that there are miles and miles of beach and there are
starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
The young boy listened politely. Then he bent down, picked up another
starfish, threw it back into the ocean past the breaking waves and
said, "It made a difference for that one."
We often think we are too insignificant or too unimportant to make a
difference. We couldn't be further from the truth. So, can I encourage
you to take the time to do something that will make a difference to
someone else's life and it doesn't have to be much and they don't need
to know. Just take a moment, do something special, the universe will
know and that's enough.
I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I
can do something; I will not refuse to do something I can do. - Helen
Keller
One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something.

Sex in Islam, - Sex, Society and Morality

This is another of the classic and seminal articles published byThe
Muslimmagazine in the sixties and seventies. This article was first
published in 1969.
Morality has become for so many people in the West and those who ape
them elsewhere, the only immoral thing. Once you defend or criticise
any action or behaviour on a moral basis, You run the risk of being
branded as unscientific, irrational, and intolerant.
Morality according to such a view is at best something that is
completely irrelevant to the material and spiritual well-being of
individuals and societies; at worst it is the one handicap that is
blocking the way of healthy progress of individuals and societies. And
this is more so especially as far as sexual morality is concerned.
For such people the best attitude towards any kind of sexual behaviour
is: stop talking nonsense about its being moral or immoral since these
descriptions are mere expressions of the speaker's subjective and
irrational attitude. And since any form of sexual behaviour is as good
as the other, the best civilised, scientific and tolerant attitude is
to let any one choose the form which he likes and not to impose on him
the form which happens to be the choice of another individual or
groups of individuals even if the latter were in the majority.
Suffice it to say that while the idea of planning is gaining grounds
in nearly every aspect of society, laissez-faire has established
itself as the best policy in matters sexual. Is morality, and in
particular sexual morality, such a superfluous and highly relative
matter that changes, without any harmful consequences, from place to
place, from age to age, and front one individual to the other?
It is my belief that this is a grossly mistaken view but I do not want
to enter here into a direct defence of morality. In fact, I think that
the best policy here is not to talk about 'morality' at all, but about
the harmful or useful consequences of adopting one or the other of the
many possible forms of sexual behaviour. And I hope that the criteria
in use for identifying a certain consequence as useful or harmful will
be acceptable to everyone irrespective of whether he is religious or
atheist, a defender of morality or a staunch enemy of such a concept.
We shall see however that the choice we finally settle on is the
behaviour we call moral. And it is called moral, and enjoined by Allah
not for any mysterious unknowable quality which they have but for
reasons similar to the ones which I shall mention. As Muslims we
believe that Allah enjoins us to do only what is good for us and avoid
only what is bad or harmful for us.
There seem to be four main types of sexual relations of which we
either have a society of pure homosexuals, an entirely promiscuous
society, a society in which no sexual relation exists except between
husband and wife or a laissez-faire society in which all these forms
are tolerated. Are there any rational and objective basis on which we
can choose among these types of societies?
Let us start with the easiest one to rule out. If men continue to be
moral then a society of pure homosexuals is a self-defeating one,
since it severs the enjoyment of sex from its reproductive function.
An entirely promiscuous society seems to many to be the best, and in
the long run the inevitable form of sexual relations. In such a
society sex, it is thought, ceases to be a problem, since here we
shall for the first time combine complete freedom with the deepest
enjoyment as well as the reproduction of children. This however is a
mere dream in which one does not see the facts as they are but as one
wants them to be. Here are some of the difficulties that beset such a
society.
Far from being the natural or ultimately the inevitable, and even if
man is viewed as a mere animal, this is a dream which shall never be
realised. This is because
"*the human animal is basically and biologically a pair-forming
species. As the emotional relationship develops between a pair of
potential mates it is aided and abetted by the sexual activities they
share. The pair formation function of sexual behaviour is so important
for our species that nowhere outside the pairing phase do sexual
activities regularly reach such a high intensity."
The facts are therefore against those who argue that man is basically
promiscuous.
"**it is true that in many cultures economic considerations have led
to gross distortion of the pair-forming pattern, but even where this
pattern's interference with officially planned 'pseudo- bonds' has
been most vigorously suppressed, with savage penalties and
punishments, it has always shown signs of reasserting itself. From
ancient times, young lovers who have known that the law may demand no
less than their lives if they are caught, have nevertheless found
themselves driven to take the risk. Such is the power of this
fundamental biological mechanism.
"***As a dream, a promiscuous society is one where everyone chooses
whoever he likes at whatever time he prefers. As a reality it is a
society in which sexual deprivation becomes the main problem. If it is
true that human beings tend naturally towards forming sexual pairs
then if x and y are such a pair and if z likes y he cannot have her
(or him) because y is already tied to x and because even if y agrees x
is sure to interfere. But why it can be asked, should z want y in
particular? Why not any other 'free' person. Well, sincerely because
such is human nature. Man is not indiscriminately attracted by every
woman that happens to be passing by.
The young and the beautiful are universally more attractive than the
ugly and the old. And then there are the personal tastes of voice,
form, culture, gesture etc., etc. And if a person fails to find the
mate of his liking, then even if he is physically satisfied, he is
emotionally deprived."
In such a society people are sure to be obsessed with sex, as the
search for the younger, the more beautiful, the what not becomes a
full time job. If time is a valuable asset then much of it is
unnecessarily wasted in such a society. And this leads inevitably and
naturally to the commercialisation of this human need, a
commercialisation which through advertisements, pictures, specialised
magazines, the employment of sexually attractive girls, and a hundred
other satanic devices, only increases the obsession with sex.
The natural outcome of this is a distortion of human values. I do not
mean by this anything metaphysical or mysterious. I only mean that in
such a society a person's worth will depend on the accident of his
being in a certain age or having a beautiful body. Girls are rewarded,
socially and materially and even 'crowned' not for anything they
achieved but for a thing they had at their hour of birth. By
implication the less beautiful girls are punished for no fault of
theirs. What a cruel society!
A promiscuous society is definitely a cruel one. Even in a normal
society, the feeling that one is getting older is somewhat annoying.
What if the older one becomes one loses not only one's vitality and
smartness, but even some of one's worth as a human being.
If many criminal tendencies both among the young and the old are
discovered to have their origins in broken homes and unstable
families, what is going to be the fate of that army of parentless
children which a promiscuous society produces? I cannot go here into
the detailed problems of the mass bringing-up of children.
These then are some examples of the consequences of living in an
entirely promiscuous society. Contemplating them one might say; well
no one ever seriously advocated this kind of society. All we stand for
is a society where every individual or group of individuals shall have
the freedom to lead the kind of sexual life which they prefer. In such
a mixed society married people will live side by side with promiscuous
individuals and homosexuals, each appreciating and respecting the
ideas and choices of the others and tolerating their behaviour. But
this will not do either.
Firstly because the bad consequences of homosexuality (with the
details of which I have not concerned myself) and promiscuity, will
not be eradicated by having those who practise them living among
married people. All the complications will be there but on a narrower
scale,
Secondly, if the consequences are admitted to be harmful why then
encourage and not lessen the factors responsible for them? And the
unfortunate fact is that tolerating homosexuality and promiscuity
means encouraging them and pushing more and more people to practise
them so much so that the inevitable result will be a promiscuous and
homosexual society with a minority of "eccentric" married people, who
shall not however be tolerated as the example of Lut's people shows.
"And Lut! (Remember) when he said unto his folk: Will ye commit
abomination such as no creature ever did before. "Lo! ye come with
lust unto men instead of women. Nay, but ye are wanton folk. "And the
answer of his people was only that they said (one to another): Turn
them out of your township. They are folk, forsooth, who keep
pure."(Surah 7:80-82)
By elimination then, and also by implication, the society with the
least evil and most good is a society of married people who do not
tolerate, but do their best to eradicate all the causes of
homosexuality and promiscuity. But the elaboration of this is the
topic of another article which I hope to write, insh'Allah.
REFERENCES:
* Desmond Morris, "The Human Zoo", p.83
** Ibid p.86
*** Ibid p.86