Should he focus on purifying his heart or ondoing naafil acts?.

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▬▬ - Which is more important– dealing with feelings and
thoughts that Allaahdislikes, such as destructive envy,
hatred,arrogance, showing off, thinking highly of one's deeds,
hard-heartedness, etc., which form the evil that resides in the heart,
or focusing on doing outward naafil deeds such as prayer, fasting and
other acts of worship and fulfilling vows even though those other
things are present in the heart? Please advise us, may Allaah reward
you with good.
Praise be to Allaah.
Some of the acts mentioned are obligatory, and those which are
obligatory should be given precedence, as Allaah says according to the
hadeeth qudsi narrated from His Messenger (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him): "Myslave does not draw near to Me with anything
more loved by Me than the religious duties I have enjoined on him."
Then He says: "And My slave continues to draw near to Me with
supererogatory works sothat I shall love him." Outward physical acts
are not valid and acceptable unless they are accompanied by
appropriate actions of the heart, because the heart is like the king
andthe physical faculties arelike his troops. If the king is evil his
troops will also be evil. Hence the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: "In the body there is a piece of flesh: if
it is sound the whole body will be sound and if it is corruptthen the
whole body willbe corrupt." Similarly the (hidden) actions of the
heart inevitably affect the (visible) physical actions. So precedence
must be given to that which is more obligatory, whether it is called
inward or outward. Perhaps things that are called inward may be more
obligatory, such as refraining from destructive envy and arrogance,
for that is more essential than observing naafil fasts. Oracts that
are described as outward or physical may be better, such as qiyaam
al-layl (praying at night), which is betterthan simply giving up some
thoughts that may cross one's mind such as (non-destructive) jealousy,
etc. Inward andoutward deeds support one another, and prayer keeps one
from doing evil actions and generates fear of Allaah, and has other
important effects. It (prayer) is the best of good deeds and charity.
And Allaah knows best.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him), Majmoo'
al-Fataawa, 6/381
So there is no separationbetween correcting what is inward and
correcting what is outward or physical.
The outward acts of worship which a person performs with his physical
faculties – if he does them for the sake of Allaah – will undoubtedly
have an effect on his inward nature.
For example, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: "Shall I not tell you of something that will take away the evil
of the heart? Fasting three daysof each month." (Narrated by
al-Nasaa'i, 2386; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh
al-Nasaa'i, 2249). The evil of the heart refers torancour, hatred and
destructive envy.
One of the most important remedies for diseases of the heart is to
study and ponder the texts which include warnings to the one who
leaves these diseases to fester in his heart, such as the hadeeth in
which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"No one will enter Paradise who has an atom's-weight of arrogance in
his heart." (Narrated by Muslim, 91).
And the hadeeth according to which Hell will say, "My share is the
arrogant." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4850; Muslim, 2846)
And the hadeeth: "On the Day of Resurrection the arrogant will be
gathered like ants in the form of men." (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi,
2492; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 2025).
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The
disease of the nations who came before you has started to spread among
you: destructive envy and hatred. These are the shavers. I do not mean
that they shave hair but they shave away religious commitment. By the
One in Whose hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you
believe, and you will notbelieve until you love one another. Shall I
not tell you of something which if you do it, you will love one
another. Spread (the greeting of) salaam amongst yourselves."
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2510; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in
Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 2038).
Whoever ponders with true insight such warnings about the diseases of
the heart willundoubtedly strive to cleanse his heart thereof, and
will seek help in doing so by doing outward physical acts, praying to
his Lord to cleanse his heart of hatred, destructive envy,rancour and
so on, as Allaah says, describing the prayer of the believers:
"and put not in our hearts any hatred against those who have believed"
[al-Hashr 59:10 – interpretation of the meaning]
And Allaah knows best. May Allaah send blessings upon our Prophet Muhammad.

How to deal with a brother’s wife who has abad attitude.

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▬▬ - I have a brother wife Who has no respect for any-one
even her husband and I live with them - can I say something to her to
change her attitude . If she refuses, what shall I do?
Do I give her Slam. Jazaka Allah Khira.
Praise be to Allaah.
A kind word opens the doors to people's hearts and removes enmity from
them, and tolerance, forgiveness and sincerity restore love between
people. When a person speaks a kind word and turns a blind eye to bad
treatment, he earns people's respect and makes the one who has done
something bad apologize for his bad behaviour or stop persisting in
it. Undoubtedly some people may choose a way of dealing with people
that they themselves would not like to be dealt with, andthey think
that being tough and confrontational is what will make people
respectthem. When a person insists on persisting in sin, and faces
harsh criticism, he finds himself lost in a vicious circle of hatred
and revenge, so he can no longer tell right from wrong or true from
false. So nobody can advise him, because whatever is said is takenas
the opening of a confrontation or a continuation of enmity, and he is
always watching and waiting for trouble. It is safer in this case to
think about how we are going to deal with such a person, so we leave
him alone for a while, trying to calm his fears of criticismand being
called to account. We use some kind words, gentleness and smiles to
make him feel that we forgive him and care about him. Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning):
"… Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e., Allaah ordered the
faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse
those who treat them badly), then verily! He between whom and you
there was enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend. But
none is granted it (the above quality), except those who are patient,
and none is granted it except the owner of the great portion (of
happiness in the Hereafter, i.e., Paradise, and in this world of a
high moral character)."[Fussilat 41:35]
Leaving the person alone does not mean cutting all ties and refraining
from returning greetings or talking to him; what it does mean is
avoiding mixing with him so that we give him the opportunity to
prepare himself to accept advice. Then we can start by mentioning his
good points and saying what good things we wish for him and the hopes
we have for him. Then we can give him advice (naseehah) in an
appropriate manner, without hurting his feelings, offending him or
boring him. We should do this in the hope of earning reward from
Allaah, and with patience and tolerance. From our behaviour and good
treatment we should set an example tothe one whom we wish to advise.
We should listen to the direction given by Allaah to His Messenger
(interpretation of the meaning):
"Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, andturn away from the foolish
(i.e., don't punishthem)."[al-A'raaf 7:199]
Rushing to condemn andcriticize without lookingfor the appropriate
moment usually leads to the opposite of the desired results. Humility
and a gentle approach lifts barriers and removes aggression and
hostility. According to a saheeh hadeeth narrated by 'Ayaad (may
Allaah be pleased with him), the Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah has revealed to me that
you should be so humblethat no one oppresses another or boasts to
another." (Reported by Muslim, 2865).

- Praised Manners, - What is zuhd (asceticism)?.

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What is zuhd (asceticism)? Does it mean wearing scruffy clothing,
fasting constantly, and keeping away from society, or something else?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Zuhd does not mean wearing scruffy clothing,withdrawing from people
and keeping away from society, or fasting constantly. The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is the leader of all
zaahids (ascetics) but he would wear new clothes; adorn himself tomeet
delegations, for Jumu'ah and for Eid; mix with people and call them to
do good and teach them about their religion; and he forbade his
companions (may Allaah be pleased with them) to fast constantly.
Rather zuhd means shunning that which is haraam and that which Allaah
hates; avoiding shows of luxury and overindulging in worldlypleasures;
focusing on doing acts of worship; and making the best preparation for
the Hereafter. The best explanation of that is the life of the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
And Allaah is the Source of strength. May Allaah send blessings and
peace upon our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions. End
quote.
Standing Committee for Academic Research and Issuing Fatwas
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa'imah li'l-Buhooth al-'Ilmiyyah wa'l-Ifta (24/369).

The One who did Sajdah to Allah - Islamic Stories

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following incident was mentioned by brother Aslam Nakhuda during a
lecture that he gave on 24/1/2004. Brother Aslam is an Imam of Jame
Masjid Brampton in Canada.
He said that three years back a group of eight brothers, including
him, set out to Texas, USA for dawah. They spent sometime there to
remind the residents about the reality of this life. On their way
back, they stopped by a service station beside a highway to perform
the Magrib prayer. One of the brothers gave the Adhan (Call to
prayer). Two Non Muslim men were passing by when the Adhan was being
called. Being curious, they came to the brothers and asked themwho
they were, where do they come from and what they were doing. The
brothers told them that they are Muslims who are coming from Toronto,
Canada with the glad tidings of Islam.A scholar, who was with them,
discussed about Islam with the non-Muslim men for 2 or3 minutes. Then
the brothers prepared to offer the salah. The non Muslims who were
standing by asked what they should be doing now. The brothers told
them to join the prayer and just follow along. The two men decided to
join the prayer. The imam recited Surah Fatiha and another surah after
it. Then he went to Ruku' and both the Non Muslims did the same. When
time for sajdah (prostration on the ground) came, the Non Muslims
started hesitating and didn't know whether they should also prostrate
on the ground as they never did this before. One of them decided notto
do so and he left the prayer. However, the other one just went to
sajdah. After the prayer, this person who agreed to prostrate to Allah
was blessed with iman. He accepted Islam from the brothers.
Dear readers, this is what we have to do. We have to submit to the
will of Allah and in return He will bless us with iman. On the other
hand, a person who is arrogant and decide not to submit to the will of
Allah may just be deprived of iman.