Moving Beyond Blame

I wrote the piece above over ten years ago. It has taken me almost
these entire ten years to learn to forgive myself. I still sometimes
see someone on the street who looks like Joe, and I have a moment of
excitement, then I remember that he is gone. But I don't blame myself
anymore. I made a mistake, but I'm not responsible for Joe putting a
needle in his arm. With everything he had to live for, he had no
excuse. If having a family, friends and freedom wasn't enough of a joy
for him, then it's unlikely that anything I said would havemade a
difference.
I don't want to blame Joe either. He lost the battle against his
internal demons, and that's enoughfor me to say. I still love him. I
guess I've gotten beyond blame, to a place of understanding or
acceptance. I'm able to think of Joe with gratitude,and with no
bitterness or regret to color it. I originally titled this piece,
"Trying to Remember the Good Times", but if I had written it today I
might callit, "Remembering a Kind Soul."
That's the miracle and glory of the human heart. That is one of the
countlessblessings of Allah. He gives us hearts that heal, and spirits
that forgive, and Time, our dear friend, who carries away all wounds
in the gentle sweep of its current.
"Allah said: 'Sons of Adam inveigh against [the vicissitudes of]
Time,but I am Time, in My hand is the night and theday.'" (hadith
qudsi, agreed upon)
If Allah is Time, and Allah isAr-Rahman ir-Raheem (TheMerciful and
Mercy-Giving), then time is a mercy and ablessing. The passage of
time is a balm and a cure.
I try to do better now in reaching out to anyone I care about who
might be in pain. I try to express something about the deen to the
non-Muslims in my life. I don't preach, but I share my enthusiasm for
Islam in small ways, and I offer a perspective that includes Allah.
If I could go back, what would I do differently? I have come to
realize that the question serves no purpose. The Polk Street festival
is a memory, a day in history, an image on a fading photo. Agonizing
over it does not help.
A better question is, what will I do differently today? What will I do
differently tomorrow, when the California sun comes up blazing, and
the world is new again, and I am blessed beyond belief with another
opportunity to redeem my soul, and to love my family and friends,and
to prostrate to Allah, and to change the world?

Recognising computer addiction in adolescents

When trying to determine whether a child is addicted to computer games
or the Internet, parents should not only consider the amount of time
the child spends at it.
This is according to Klaus Woelfling, co-director of the Outpatient
Gambling Addiction Department at Mainz University Medical Centre's
Clinic for Psychosomatic Medicine and Psychotherapy.
More important, said Mr. Woelfling in an interview with DPA , are the
situations, in which adolescents sit in front of acomputer screen —
"for example, when they're stressed or have personal problems." Some
addicts spend a constant amount of time in front of a computer, but
that period is of heightened intensity.
"This means they feel an urge to use their computer on a particular
occasion, or always at the same time," said Mr. Woelfling, adding
there was no clear-cut line between addiction and non-addiction.
A further sign of addiction is preoccupation. If parentsfeel their
child's life revolves around computer games or online chats,
theyshould speak to the child about it, he said.
"If, when out with their child, parents realise the child is getting
restless andbadly wants to go home tothe computer, they should ask,
'Why is it so importantto you right now?'" Mr. Woelfling advised.
Parents should not be reproachful. This increases their chancesof
gaining insight into howthe child thinks.
Computer addicts display withdrawal symptoms when denied access to a
PC. "Parents might receive threats if the PC is removedfrom the
child's room," Mr. Woelfling noted. This previously unknown side of
the child shocks parents,he said.
Confronted with their addiction, addicts typically deny that they have
a problem. So parents shouldproceed cautiously and describe their
impressions only. It is better to say, "I think you've got an
addictive disorder" than "You've got a real addiction," Mr. Woelfling
said.
If signs point to an addiction, parents should try to take their child
to a counselling centre. A conversation will then determine whether
the child is ready for treatment. "You can't treat anyone against his
or her will, though," Mr. Woelflingsaid.

Good Morning tips

Lines by a depressed hearti don't know why life teaches me so many
lessons, when i am not interested in learning.good morning
]
Unbeaten thought ever take what ever u can fromur life.. bcoz.. when
life starts taking from u.. it takes even ur last breath.good morning
]
May you rise each texting day with fully charged cell phone in your
hand, Inspiring message in your mind, me in your heart Good Morning
]
morning shows the day destination shows the way don't u under stand
what i say hey good morning
]
Friendship need no promises No demands Andno expectations it just
needs two people ONE COOL LIKE ME AND ONE SWEET LIKE YOU Good Morning

Mosques Around The Globe

Faisal Mosque construction:In 1969, an international competition was held in
which architects from 17 countries submitted 43 proposals. After four
days of deliberation, Turkish architect Vedat
Dalokay's design was chosen.