Islamic Article :- The Second Wife

I heard a commentary the otherday which hit home like little else has
in a long time. A news commentator had just finished interviewing some
local youngsters on the impact that the Clinton/Lewinsky affair had
upon them. Most of the young people said the same. "It is personal."
"Let him be." "No oneis perfect." and so forth... The commentator,
when summing up his report said, "The President is supposed to
represent the morals and valuesof the society that he represents." He
paused and then said, "Maybe that is the problem."
That pretty much summed it up.Clinton represents the morals and values
of America. He is the poster-child for the greedy, over-indulgent
American who isconcerned with nothing more than self gratification. So
why do so many Muslims idealize this society? Why are so many of us so
enamoured with the values of these people that we either appologize
for or even deny basic tenents of our belief?
One such tenent is polygyny. Polygyny is the practice of marrying more
than one wife. Unfortunately, often the term polygamy - the practice
of marrying more than one spouseis used to describe the practice in
Islam. This is incorrect. Islam allows more than one wife, up to four.
I have found that Muslims have fallen prey to the Western ideal of one
woman for one man, which is laughable when you look to the reality of
their relationships. The majority of men admit to committing adultery
and a growing numberof women do the same. The system in the West has
been described by some as serial monogomy because of the insane
divorce rate, but is in reality little more than a charadefor an open
unchecked worshipof human desire.
Unfortunately, I have heard Muslim women say, I would rather that my
husband commit adultery than that he bring a second wife. What a low
state we have reached that such a comment could ever come from a
Muslim. May Allah (SWT) Guide us, Ameen!
I have even heard Muslims actually ask, "Why is it allowed for men but
not for women to have more than one spouse at atime?" Our level of
faith in the Wisdom of Allah has fallen to such an all-time low, that
we no longer think that it is wrong or even disliked to question the
judgement of Allah.
Too many of us follow the West into the lizard hole, and we don't even
bother to take a lightwith us to see if it is safe. We nolonger care.
We assume that they know what they are doing and we jump in with no
fear. I wish such Muslims would have the same amount of faith in Allah
(SWT) that they have in theWest.
We have to start dealing with Islamic issues with the eyes andears and
minds of Muslims, not with the tongues of the Kafirs, Insha-Allah.
Look to this society. Any sane, rational human being can see the
destruction they have brought upon themselves with their modern
concepts of love, justice, equality and humanrights. The only true
definitions of these concepts are those revealed by Allah (SWT) and
taught and practiced by His beloved Messenger. America hasshown itself
to be devoid of values, time and time again, but too many Muslims
blindly ignorethe results of these actions and continue to follow
them, footstep by footstep.
Allah (SWT) has made it so easy for us. He has given us all that we
need to deal with any issue that may present itself. He has paved an
even, straight path forus, so why do so many of us consistantly veer
to roads that are clearly wraught with dangerand isapointment? Allah
(SWT) has blessed us with guidance. He has blessed us with knowledge.
He has blessed us with Islam. So, which of the blessings of our Lord
will we ignore?
Allah (SWT) says,
"... Marry of the women that please you; two, three or four, but if
you fear you will not be able to deal justly, then only one..."
(An-Nisa 4:3)
I have looked to this statement many times. Some people point out to
me the part that speaks of dealing justly, and they matchit with,
"And you have it not in your power to do justice between wives, even
though you may wish (it), but be not disinclined (from one) with total
disinclination, so that you leave her as it were in suspense; and if
you effect a reconciliation andguard (against evil), then surely Allah
is Forgiving, Merciful."
(An-Nisa 4:129).
Here, they say, it is impossible for a person to be fair, therefore it
is not allowed to marry more than one. This doesnot match what is
written. The verse says to not desert them. How can this be a command
to not marry more than one? Also, I find this theory hard to accept
since I know that the prophet, the companions, the second generation,
the third generationand so forth were all practicers of polygyny. If
it were wrong, oreven makru - as some state - then we would not find
the majority among our best generations practicing it.

--
/ - - {http://feeds.feedburner.com/blogspot/edkGf}
/ - - - -

Let go of anger and replace it with forgiveness

A man said to the Messenger of Allah, (sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam–
peace be upon him): "Advise me! "The Prophet said, "Do not become
angry and furious." The man asked (the same) again and again, and the
Prophet said in each case, "Do not become angry and furious."
[Al-Bukhari; Vol. 8 No. 137]
Resolve to give up anger, even ifonly for today. Whatever anger you
are harboring against others, let it go. Whatever angeryou have
against yourself for mistakes you have made, or for wrongs you have
done, let it go.It's not helping you, it is only damaging your own
spirit.
Remember that we are human; we are all imperfect. From the very
beginning, starting with Adam and Hawaa (Adam and Eve) we humans made
mistakes.
Other people have made mistakes and harmed you in thepast because they
are human; forgive them. You have made mistakes because you are human;
forgive yourself, and turn to Allah in
tawbah (repentance).
The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)has taught us some strategies for dealing
with anger. For example, he said:
"I know a word, the saying of which will cause him to relax, if he
does say it. If he says: 'I seek Refuge with Allah from Satan' then
all his anger will go away."
[Al-Bukhari; Vol. 4, No. 502]
And he said,
"Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire
is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he
should perform ablution."
[Abu Daud; Book 41, No. 4766]
Abu Dharr narrated: The Apostleof Allah, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam,
said to us: "When one of you becomes angry while standing, he should
sit down. If the anger leaves him,well and good; otherwise he should
lie down."
[Abu Daud; Book 41, No. 4764]
In another hadith, the Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:
"If one of you becomes angry then he should be silent."
Narrated 'Abdur Rahman bin Abi Bakra: Abu Bakr wrote to his son who
was in Sijistan: Do not judge between two personswhen you are angry,
for I heardthe Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, saying:
"A judge should not judge between two persons while he is in an angry
mood." [Al-Bukhari; Vol. 9, No. 272]
So the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, has given us
several strategies to deal with anger:
Seek refuge with Allah from Shaytan. This reminds us that fury and
rage are not good things; they are evil forces that we need to get rid
of before they take us over. Seeking refuge with Allah reminds us that
Allah is near, watching us; also it reminds us to turn the matter over
to Allah, so that we can let go of our anger.
Perform wudu' (ritual washing for purity). SubhanAllah, what a
beautiful thing. The wudu' is a source of blessings and barakah for
us. It also has a powerful symbolic value, washing away our anger and
making us peaceful and pure.
Sit down, or even lie down. Modern science has learned thatthe body
influences the emotions as well as the other way around. So assuming a
peaceful posture leads to peaceful emotions. Sitting downor lying down
are non-threatening positions. This helps to defuse any conflict
before it escalates.
Stay silent. This is very important. All too often spousesor family
members say things toeach other in anger, and later they deeply regret
their words. By then it's too late: the words have been uttered and
the damage is done. When you are most angry is precisely the time to
remain silent. Seek refuge with Allah, make wudu, pray, gofor a walk,
go to the masjid… allow yourself time to calm down and reflect.
Do not judge between people (in other words make importantdecisions).
Obviously making important decisions out of anger is a formula for
disaster.
These are all wonderful points for dealing with anger in the moment.
However, in todays " Islamic Sunray" I am also speaking about past
anger. We all have old emotional wounds that we carry around like
scars. We have old resentments and hurts.
If you hold on to these hurts, they will destroy your marriage, or at
least make it an unhappy, chafing relationship. Holding onto
resentments and grudges will destroy your friendships, leaving you
isolated. These persistent negative emotions will eat into your own
soul, leaving you bitter and unhappy.
Let them go. Modern medicine tells us that carrying around these old
resentments and anger is bad for the health.
Steven Stosny, PhD, and author of "The Powerful Self: A Workbook of
Theraputic Self Empowerment", says,
"Consistent, prolonged levels of anger give a person a five
timesgreater chance of dying before age 50. Anger elevates blood
pressure, increases threat of stroke, heart disease, cancer,
depression, anxiety disorders, and, in general, depresses the immune
system (angry people have lots of little aches and pains or get a lot
of colds and bouts of flu or headaches or upset stomachs).

--
/ - - {http://feeds.feedburner.com/blogspot/edkGf}
/ - - - -

Towards the Right Path

For all the Muslim brothers & Sisters out there who have atleast a
little Faith & Fear of Allah in their heart & wish to change & move
through the RIGHT PATH !! Allah Bless Us All!

Reaching the top is easy. Preserving it is difficult. Tothose whom
Allah guided to become practicing, preserve your peak because Satan is
waiting to get you down. I have seen people who lost it because they
were over confident in themselves. The minute you depend on yourself,
thinking that you can do it, Allah will leave you on your own. In the
famous supplication ofthe Prophet salla Allahu alaihi wa sallam: O
Ever living and Sustainer, in your mercy I seek refuge. Fix all of my
matters and do not leave me depending on myself not even a blink of an
eye. I wonder, how many of us are left to themselves and are lost
without Allah's guidance.

--


/ - - - -
- ~ - ~ - :->

The Prophet's Last Sermon

This sermon was delivered on the ninth day of Dhul Hijah, 10 A.H. (632
A.D.) in the valley of Mount Arafat. The contents of the message were
collected from different narrations, and there are other parts to it
that are not mentioned here. This sermon still needs the authenticity
of all of its parts to be checked.
"O People , lend me an attentive ear, for I know not whether, after
this year, I shall ever be amongst you again. Therefore, listen to
what I am saying to you very carefully and take these words to those
who could not be present today.
O People , just as you regard this month, this day,this city as
sacred, so regard the life and property of every Muslim as a sacred
trust. Return the goods entrusted to youto their rightful owners. Hurt
no one so that no one may hurt you. Remember that you will indeed meet
your Lord, and that He will indeed reckon your deeds. Allah has
forbidden you to take interest, therefore, all interest obligations
shall henceforth be waived. Yourcapital, however, is yours to keep.
You will neither inflict nor suffer inequity. Allah has judged that
thereshall be no interest and that all interest due to Abbas bin
Abdul-Muttalib (the prophet's uncle) shall henceforth be waived.
Every right arising out of homicide in pre-Islamic days is henceforth
waived and the first such right I waive is that arising from the
murder of Rabiyah bin Al-Harith (relative of the prophet). O Men, the
unbelievers indulge in tampering with the calendar in order to make
permissible that which Allah forbade, and to forbidthat which Allah
had made permissible. With Allah the months are twelve; four of them
are holy; three of these are successive and one occurs singly between
the months of Jumadah and Shaaban. Beware of Satan, for the safety of
your religion. He has lost all hope that he will ever be able to lead
you astray in big things, so beware of following him in small things.
O People , it is true that you have certain right withregard to your
women, butthey also have rights over you. If they abide by your right
then to them belongsthe right to be fed and clothed in kindness. Do
treat your women well andbe kind to them for they are your partners
and committed helpers. And it is your right that they do not make
friends with any one of whom you do not approve, as well as never
commit adultery.
O People , listen to me in earnest, worship Allah, say your five daily
prayers, fast during the month of Ramadhan, and give your wealth in
zakat. Perform Hajj if you can afford to. All mankind is from Adam
andEve, an Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab, nor a non-Arab has
any superiority over anArab; also a white has no superiority over a
black, nor a black has any superiority over white except by piety and
good action. Learn that every Muslim is the brother of another Muslim,
and that Muslims constitute one brotherhood. Nothing shallbe
legitimate to a Muslim which belongs to a fellow Muslim unless it was
given freely and willingly. Do not,therefore, do injustice to your
selves.
Remember , one day you will appear before Allah and answer for your
deeds.So beware, do not stray from the path of righteousness after I
am gone.
O People , no prophet or apostle will come after me and no new faith
will be born. Reason well, therefore, O People, and understand my
words which I convey to you. I leave behind me two things, the Quran
and my example, the Sunnah, and if you follow these you willnever go
astray.
All those who listen to me shall pass on my words to others, and those
to others again; and may the last ones understand my wordsbetter that
those who listen to me directly. Be mywitness O Allah, that I
haveconveyed Your message to Your people."

--


/ - - - -
- ~ - ~ - :->