Marital Life, - Diary of a Shopaholic’s Husband

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I wish for the day when my wife will tell me that she has come to hate shopping, but I do not think that will ever happen. Her intense love for shopping does not let her get bored or tired of going to the mall, where she hops from one store to the other with resolve and determination. When she expresses her desire to go shopping, I ask her if she needs something, to which she astonishingly replies, “Should I need to buy something to have a reason to go shopping?”
I remind her often that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, described the market to be the worst and most hateful place to Allaah The Almighty, to no avail. I then console myself with the idea that all or most women love shopping, as a British study proved that their overall health improves while on a shopping spree, whereas us men’s blood pressure and heart rate increases, and we become prone to irritability.
Today, I read a whole article on shopping, written by a psychologist who used the term “shopping fever”; he said: “This rush to shops is not a mere pastime; it is an alleviating response to an urge.” I admired the confession of a woman who felt she was easy prey for discount sale advertisements and the glitter of shop windows. She said: “Whenever I feel nervous or strained, the first thing I think of is to go shopping, which has become like an addiction.”
The philosopher René Descartes is quoted to have said: “I think, therefore I am”; it seems that many women would offer the variant, “I shop, therefore I am.”
Seeing that women and shopping go together, I feel I can now excuse my wife for not getting bored with it and becoming so energetic whenever she intends to go to the mall.
However, I have laid down some rules:
-I make sure I accompany her or send one of our sons with her, so that the salesemen are decent to her when they show their products.
-I tell my wife that we will end our shopping trip withSalaah, so she does not hang around the shops unnecessarily and hurries to buy what she needs before theAthaan)call to prayer( of theMaghrib)sunset( or ‘Ishaa’)evening( prayer.
-Similarly, when she goes with my son, I set a time and place for them to meet shortly before the time ofAthaan.
-I also advise her to buy what she needs in one go, as there might not be a chance in the near future, to go shopping again. Consequently, I put an end to the habit of shopping several times for the same thing.
Finally, I cannot conceal that sometimes I do benefit from my wife’s love for shopping, because now, that I go with her, I can use it as a bargaining chip, if I want her to do something for me.

- PUBLISHERNajimudeeN M