Question:
I am in love with a non-Muslim married girl. I guess its one sided
from me. I just care about her. Is it ok for me to wish and pray for
her to get together in other life? I wish and pray for her all the
time. I guess only Allah knows how much I love her. Can I wish to be
with her in real life after death? If I do good things and Allah
Blesses me with (heaven) can I ask for her in Heaven to be with me?
Answer:
Assalamu alaykum
In the name of Allah, the Inspirer of Truth.
Dear brother, let us put a few things into perspective.
For one, you should not have let this love develop. It is not
permissible for Muslim men to have casual social relationships with
members of the opposite sex. It is normally through such interactions
that unlawful relationships and sentiments are fostered and then
difficult to overcome. Islam puts a stop to these from the beginning.
The other problem is that she is already married. Hence, marriage to
her does not even seem an option for you. It is bad enough to be in
such an infatuation with a non-married girl but it is far more serious
when this kind of attachment is with a married woman.
You must stop seeing her at once, either by changing or dropping out
completely of the class, if this is taking place at school; or
transferring to another office or finding another job, if this is at
work. All types of contact: telephone, email, etc. must cease
immediately, even if it be without explanation, since unnecessarily
prolonging it can only be detrimental. If you continue to be in close
proximity to her, then this will be extremely difficult to end.
Pray to Allah to deliver you from such a dangerous infatuation in
which you torture yourself unnecessarily. Du'as work wonders. You must
also sincerely pray to Allah for forgiveness for allowing such an
infatuation to develop.
Actively look to get married with a pious Muslim woman. This way you
will be able to fulfill the natural craving and desire of your soul
and replace this woman with a woman you are married to.
Insha Allah, if you are able to follow through with these steps, then
God-willing, you can overcome this problem.
Please do not see this as an insurmountable problem, something that
you have to take with you to the grave, even if it currently seems
like it. Remember, this can only continue if you fuel it by
communication, thoughts, and proximity to her.
The Prophet Muhammad (upon him be blessings and peace) said, "The
hearts are in the fingers of the Merciful One, He turns them as He
wishes." [Muslim and Ahmad]
Hence, nothing is difficult upon Allah. He is in control of all
things. But we must pray for His assistance.
And He knows best.
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Sunday, October 20, 2013
Fathwa, - In love with non-Muslim married woman�
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