How to achieve humbleness

Islam highly commends humbleness and simplicity and reckons that as
one of the traits of a true believer. The Prophetsaid:"Al-Kibr )proud
and arrogance( is rejecting the truth and looking down upon
people."]Muslim, At-Tirmithi and Abu Daawood[
Humility is for one who is important and significant and he fears to
gain notoriety or to become too great among people.As it was said,
"Humble yourself, you will be as a glimmering star to the viewer on
the surface of the water even if it is lofty." We don't say to an
ordinary person,"Humble yourself." But it is said tohim, "Know the
value of yourself, and do not place it in the wrong place!"
It was narrated by Al-Khattaabiin Al-Uzlahthat Imaam `Abdullaah ibn
Al-Mubaarakcame to Khuraassaan ]in Persia[ and went to a person who
was known for his Zuhd and Wara']asceticism and cautiousness in
piety[, so when he entered wherethe man was, he )the man( did not turn
around nor give him anyconsideration at all.
When 'Abdullaah Ibn Al-Mubaarakleft, some of the people who were
inside with the man said to him, "Don't you know who he was?!"He said,
"No." He was told, "This is the 'Ameer of the believers...`Abdullaah
Ibn Al-Mubaarak." So the man was astonished and came out to 'Abdullaah
Ibn Al-Mubaarak in a hurry apologizing and absolving himself from what
happened, saying, "O Abu 'Abdur-Rahmaan! Forgive me and advise me!"
Ibn Al-Mubaarak said, "Yes... whenever you come out of your house and
see someone, assume that he is better than you!" He knew that the man
was conceited. When 'Abdullaah Ibn Al-Mubaarakinquired as to what the
man's profession was, he found out that he was a weaver!! Therefore,
this educatedImaam noticed that this Mutazahhid )devoted pious person(
possessed a kind of arrogance, conceitedness and feeling of
superiority over others.
This disease sometimes envelops pious people; this is why he was
offered advice that was easy for him. Many times we find this
characteristic in some pious people, as well as some callers toIslam.
But when it reaches the small students who misbehave with their
scholars and teachers, this really hurts inside! There is no objection
if you differ in opinion or judgment with a scholar as long as you are
qualified to do so. The problem occurs when this difference of opinion
becomes a destructive element to the scholar's dignity, diminishes his
value, disregards and disrespects him.
One should humble himself with his companions. Frequently whenthe
spirit of competition and envy is agitated between companions and
rivals, a person may feel superior over his companion, he may be
pleased byharming him, degrading his valueand importance, accusing him
of defects or exaggerating his faults; faults that may have come to
light when seeking advice, or correction. In reality this is called
jealousy.
Humility is to humble oneself to one who is below you. If you find
someone who is younger than you, or of less importance than you, you
should not despise him, because he might have a better heart than you,
or be less sinful, or closer to Allaah than you. Even if you see a
sinful person and you are righteous, do not act with arrogance towards
him, and thank Allaah that He saved you from the tribulation that He
put him through. Remember that there might be some Riyaa')showing off(
or vanity in your righteous deeds that may cause them to be of no
avail, and that this sinful person may be regretful and fearful
concerning his bad deeds, and this may be the cause of forgiveness of
his sins.
According to Jundubthe Messenger of Allaahmentioned that a man said,
"By Allaah, Allaah will not forgive so-and-so," and that Allaah
said:"Who is swearing by Me that I will not forgive so-and-so? I
surely have forgiven so-and-so and nullified your
deeds."]Muslim[.Therefore, do not act in arrogantly towards anyone.
Even when you see a sinner, do not show superiority towards him, nor
treat him with arrogance anddomination. If you feel that the sinner
may perform some acts of obedience which you do not, and that you may
also posses some defects which the sinner may not, then deal kindly
with him, and gently give Da`wah which will hopefully be the cause of
his acceptance and remembrance.
Your deeds also should not become too great in your eyes. If you do a
good deed, or attempt to get closer to Allaah through anact of
obedience, your deed still may not be accepted. Allaah Says what
means:"…Indeed, Allaah only accepts from the righteous]who fear
Him[."]Quran 5:27[This is why some ofthe Salaf)predecessors( said, "If
I knew that Allaah accepted one Tasbeeh)saying "Subhaanallaah"( from
me, I would have wished to die right now!"
The arrogant person never gives credit to anybody or mentions good
about someone, and if he needed to do so, he would also mention
defects of that person. But if he hears somebody reminding him about
his own defects, he will not be flexible nor comply due to his
inferiority complex. This is why it is among man's moral integrity to
accept criticism or comment without any sensitivity or discomfort or
feelings of shame and weakness. Here he is, the 'Ameer of the
Believers `Umarraising the flag and lifting the motto, "May Allaah
have mercy on a person who informed us of our defects."