Family disintegration – II

Furthermore, drugs are one of the reasons behind family
disintegration. This is a dangerous disease that has affected a lot of
the youth nowadays. Our enemies have spread drugs and on account of
our youth not being brought up Islamically, this explosion of drugs is
but a natural result.
Also, unemployment forces young men to deal with drugs to make money
and so do their family problems drive them to use it. Fathers do not
care who their sons befriend, as well, and in this way, they might
make friends with evil people who introduce drugs to them whilst the
parent is heedless.
Family breakdown also results from lack of compassion and benevolence
in the house, on the parents' part. The father returns from work,
eats, drinks, sleeps and then wakes up and spends the night with his
friends; meanwhile, the mother is busy with the new fashions surfacing
in the market and with visiting her friends, and has no time to attend
to her children, who are being looked after by a maid.
As regards working mothers, who become exhausted due to their nature
of possessing weak bodies, work problems affect them physically and
emotionally; therefore, they do not have the time or mind to check on
their children before going to work.
Some mothers admit that they have gotten fed up with their children
and husbands. Furthermore, the father claims that he provides them
with the best food, drinks, toys, computers as well as school
necessities, and that they lack nothing. What a poor man, though! In
truth, they lack something which is very essential– love and
compassion and a good model. These men are only spending to suffice
their children's bodies, whereas they need them to sit and play with
them.
Listen to what Allaah Says regarding Prophet Yahyaa (i.e., John) what
means:"…And We gave him judgment while yet a boy."[Quran 19: 12]
Hence, Allaah bestowed on him prophethood, knowledge and, as Allaah
Says (what means):"And affection from Us and purity, and he was
fearing of Allaah."[Quran 19: 13] It is indeed a bounty from Allaah
that He made him, peace be upon him, an affectionate, merciful, kind
and caring person.
Allaah, then, made this compassion and mercy give rise to something
great, as He Says, referring to himwhat means:"And dutiful to his
parents, and he was not a disobedient tyrant."[Quran 19: 14]
Another of the causes of the collapse of the family is the use of
magic, for people take revengefrom each other by means of it, which
has resulted in Islamic monotheism fading away from people's
practices. Magic is certainly a reality and it does have effects on
people. Allaah Says (what means):"…And [yet] they learn from them
(i.e., the two angels as a test for people) that by which they cause
separation between a man and his wife. But do not harm anyonethrough
it except by permission of Allaah…."[Quran: 2 102]
Surely, no harm can be done except with the leave of Allaah and unless
He has already decreed that it would cause detriment. Allaah continues
to Say (what means):"…And they [i.e. people] learn what harm them and
do not benefit them. But they [i.e. the Children ofIsrael] certainly
knew that whoever purchased it [i.e. magic] would not have in the
Hereafter any share…."[Quran: 2 102]
Accordingly, he who deals with magic will have no share in the
Hereafter, meaning no reward. The penal law for the magician is to be
killed because magicians are really disbelievers. Allaah concludes
this verse, Saying (what means):"…And wretched isthat for which they
sold themselves, if they only knew."
Nonetheless, in the present day, people are confused and unaware of
the reality of magic; they believe that a magician can kill them and
do not rely on Allaah, Who Says (what means):"And whoever relies upon
Allaah — then He is sufficient for him…."[Quran: 65: 3]
Putting one's faith in Allaah stopsthe effect of magic, whilst weak
souls who are not obedient and whose conviction is wavering
willdefinitely be affected. It is they who do not maintain their daily
remembrance of Allaah and the designated Thikr (i.e., remembrance of
Allaah) and supplications at bed time or afterprayers, such as the
recitation of Chapters Al-Falaq, An-Naas and Al-Ikhlaas three times
after the prayer and before going to bed, for these chapters are the
best cure for magic and for preventingit.
Additionally, one needs to be careful concerning who enters the house
and allow only righteous people to come inside, since otherwise, evil
people who might place magic in the house would enter and then people
willhave to start looking for someone to cure them from the spell.
The Prophetwas affected by magic which was done over him by a Jewish
magician; what curedhim from it? It was by means of these three
aforementioned chapters and with the permissionof Allaah, together
with the blessings of the Quran, which hasa great effect on the souls
and heals, provided that people believe in its effect.
Video and television are also amongst the causes of the disintegration
of the family, for these two devices disseminate poison and
immorality. Some people think that it brings the family closer when
they gather towatch a movie on video or television, although the fact
is that they do not talk to each other whilst the film is playing and
if one does try to make a comment, everybody silences him. In some
houses, there is a television set in each room, plus the satellite
dish that you would spot everywhere.
Statistics have proved that television deprives a person from enjoying
his social life and from reading; it helps in isolating him from
others and reduces the levelof understanding between spouses besides
distracting students from their studies. It has also been confirmed
that kidsdo not spend the required amount of time with the rest of the
family after the television hascrossed the doorstep of people's homes.
This is in addition to the types of corruption they are exposed to
because of it.
Continuing the talk about the reasons of breakdown, one of which is
allowing the girls to talkon the phone with just about anybody. A
young man might talkto her, praising and flirting with her, making her
feel like she is floating in the sky; as soon as shereturns from
school, she sits nextto the phone awaiting his call to hear more of
his flirting. Afterwards, he falsely promises to marry her, requests
to meet her and then, this leads to her committing adultery; the
disastertakes places, whereby she loses the most precious thing she
possesses, then he walks out on her and what happens? When people come
to ask for her hand, what can she say? This is all due to the lack of
supervision and thewrong way of upbringing by the parents.
If we do not return to Allaah withsincerity, more collapse will
occurand we will fall to the same level as the disbelievers'
societies, where elders are humiliated and placed in foster homes, and
daughters become rebellious andgo out on the streets; thereupon,we
will be sitting, watching whathappens helplessly.
Are we wise enough to truly return to Allaah and put an end to the
state our families have reached?
You will be held accountable concerning what you are entrusted with,
for these childrenare a trust which Allaah has placed in your hands
and will ask you about on a Day when wealth and offspring will be
futile and only he who meets Allaah with a sound heart will benefit
from his heart that is full of faith.
Each person will be concerned only about his own self and people will
pay no attention to their fathers, mothers, brothers or sisters. This
will be the Day of Judgment, the great, horrible Daywhich is fifty
thousand years long. We honestly need to keep the remembrance of this
day alive in our hearts and minds andstart rectifying our situation.