My daughter and the inaccessible fort

Like a wonderful butterfly and a beautiful flower, she joyously moves
here and there, creating an atmosphere of happiness and pleasure.
Whenever I see her, my heart and eyes fill with great delight. Once,
she had a fever because of a sore throat -- a common childhood disease
-- which made her little body become feverish. Her temperature kept
rising until it reached about 41 degrees. Rushing to the doctor with
five-year-old Suhaylah, her mother did not stop supplicating Allaah
The Almighty for her and reciting Sharee'ah-approved Ruqyah
(supplications for healing) and invocations for her sick child all the
way in the car. Suhaylah was mumbling deliriously because of her high
fever. What did she say during these moments of delirium? She was
saying, "Recite the Quran for me! Recite the Quran for me! Whoever
loves me let him recite the Quran for me!"
Did this young girl realize that the Quran is her resort during such a
hard time and her fort where she seeks protection?
Many of us may have faced a similar situation where the sick or
fevered child in particular recites Quranic verses or urges those
around him to recite for him as Suhaylah did.
What are the implications relatedto a sound upbringing in this situation?
1- Responsibility of engraving on the hearts of children:
One of the strongest indications in this situation is that the
heartsof children are so pure and so quickly affected and ready to
receive what adults inculcate in them. Hence, the responsibility
ofadults before Allaah The Almightyis great. The Prophet said: "Allaah
will ask every caretaker about everything that was entrusted to him,
whether he preserved it or wasted it."
Imaam Al-Ghazaali said,
The child is a trust with his parents and his pure heart is a precious
jewel that is free from any inscription or image. He is ready to learn
anything that he is taught and to incline to what people around him
incline to. If he is accustomed to doing what is good, he will
continue to do what is good and will be happy inthis worldly life and
the Hereafter. Everyone who taught and participated in raising him
will share the reward with him. Ifhe is accustomed to doing what is
evil and is neglected like animals, he will be miserable anddoomed.
The caretaker and guardian will bear the sin. No matter how important
discipline is to preserve the child from the fire of this worldly
life; it is worthier for the caretaker or guardian to preserve the
child from the fire of the Hereafter by refining and disciplining him.
The behavior, interests and appearance of the child are a result of
the upbringing of parents. For scholars of Islamic upbringing and
ethics, it is an unquestionable fact that the child is born with a
sound innate inclination to Tawheed (Islamic Monotheism), the creed of
belief in Allaah The Almighty and the original state of purity. If an
atmosphere of sound upbringing at home, righteousness in societyand a
believing educational environment are provided to him;undoubtedly the
child will grow up holding firm belief and virtuous morals.
2- Importance of the child's early years in upbringing and building
his character:
In his early years, the child learns many more things than expected by
his parents. Customs can be acquired easily at a younger age where 90
percent of the upbringing process takes place inthe first five years.
The importance of early childhood "pre-school or pre-discerning stage"
is highlighted when we know that the human childhood period is longer
than the childhood of any other creature. The childhood of humans is
characterized with purity, flexibility and soundness of disposition.
It lasts for a long time where the parent can instill what he wants in
the child. The child adheres throughout his life to the values that he
was brought up on and accustomed to. What the child receives in his
early childhood delineates the basic features of his future character.
It becomes difficult to change these features even if they are
undesirable. Margaret Mahler said that the first three years of every
person's life are considered a new birth.
As Allaah The Almighty made parents responsible for the creed of their
child, He made the child learn only from his parents during the stage
of his early childhood. The child sees his parents as a high example
in every respect, so that he cannot believe anyone other than them.
Hence, Allaah The Almighty fortifies the child from the
effectsemanating from outside the family in his early childhood.
Sincere parents carry out their duties assigned by Allaah The
Almighty, who also made the child depend upon his parents in every
matter during this period.
Moreover, in this period, the childtends to satisfying and
complyingwith his parents in order to hear words of admiration and
praise. Knowing this fact, it is obvious that parents should utilize
this period in building up the aspect of faith in the child's
personality and disciplining and teaching himin the proper way.
Ibn Al-Jawzi said, "The best discipline is that which takes place at a
young age. If the child is allowed to behave freely; brought up
without discipline, it becomes hard to put him on the right path
later."
So, parents and mentors should forget the sentences, which are usually
stumbling blocks in the way of disciplining many children, such as
"they are still young" or "when they get older, they will know the
right way." - - ▓███▓ Translator:->
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