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Wednesday, January 9, 2013

The significance of obedience to parents

Islam builds a family in which prevails mutual respect and care.
Parents and children in Islam are bound together by mutual obligations
and reciprocal arrangements. Allaah Says (what means): "…No mother
should be harmed through her child, and no father through his child…"
[Quran 2: 233]
The Quran has made it compulsory for the child to treat his parents
with all goodness and mercy.
Every Muslim must show goodness and mercy to his parents throughout
their lives. There is only one exception to this, and that is, if the
parents ask their children to associate anything with Allaah and to
commit sins, then the children must not obey their parents. In all
cases, the children must show love and gratitude to their parents.
They must always speak to them gently and respectfully. They must try
their best to make them happy, provided they do not disobey Allaah in
the process.
Allaah says (what means): "But if they (both) strive with you to make
you join in worship with me others of which you have no knowledge,
then obey them not; but behave with them in the world kindly…" [Quran
31:15]
Being patient and tolerant with parents:
The children must take great care not to react to what their parents
have to say. If they say or do anything which is not liked or approved
of by the children, then they must show patience and tolerance instead
of giving vent to their anger. The children must scrupulously try to
refrain from disobeying their parents since the Prophet regarded this
as one of the grave sins.
Supplicating for them:
Far from showing signs of displeasure, the children must pray for them
saying, as Allaah teaches us in the verse (which means): "…My Lord and
Sustainer! Be kind and have mercy on them as they cherished,nurtured
and sustained me in childhood." [Quran 17: 24]
We must continue praying for them even after they die. Such prayer
will be regarded as a continuous charity asthe Prophet, sallallaahu
alayhi wa salllam, told us.
The greater right of the mother:
The children must be kinder and more gratefulto their mothers since
they took greater pains in their upbringing. That is why the Prophet
emphasized that it is the mother who has the first claim on the
child's care and attention.
Once a companion asked the Prophet as to whom he should showmore
kindness. The Prophet replied: "Your mother." He asked who comes next
and the Prophet again replied: "Your mother." He asked the Prophet yet
again who comes next. The Prophet replied: "Your mother." When the
companion asked for the fourth time, only then did the Prophet reply:
"Your father."
Recognizing their great status:
The Muslim should recognize the status of the parent and know his
duties towards them. Thestatus of parents in Islam is a status which
mankind had not known before. Allaah Has placed the respect for the
parents just one step below the belief in Allaahand true worship of
Him.
Allaah says (what means): " And your Lord has decreed that you not
worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or
both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much
as],"uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word."
[Quran 17: 23]
The Prophet placed kindness and respect towards parents just after the
prayer offered on time as the prayer is the foundation of Islam.
'Abdullaah Ibn Mas'ood said: "I asked the Prophet which deed is most
liked by Allaah? He said: ' Prayer offered on time.' I asked him:
'Then what? He said: ' Kindnessand respect towards parents.'…"
[Al-Bukhaari and Muslim]
Knowing the duties towards them:
It is also the duty of the child to provide for his parents, if he is
able to do so. The Quran sums upthe whole matter in a master concept
called Ihsaan, which denotes what is right, good and beautiful (i.e.
showing tothem kindness, compassion, gratitude, reverence and respect,
praying for them and supporting them financially if they are in need.)
Concluding, we mention a verse that shows the significance of
obedienceand gratitude due to parents: Allaah says (what means): " And
We haveenjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried
him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in
two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final]
destination." [Quran 31:14]

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