Comedy

" தலைவர் ஏடாகூடமா கேள்வி கேட்டு வம்புல மாட்டிகிட்டாரு!"
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" அப்படி என்ன கேட்டுட்டார்!"
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" பிரிஞ்சிருந்த ரெண்டு குடும்பமும் ஒண்ணு சேர்ந்திடிச்சு,
ரெண்டு டீ.வி எப்போ ஒண்ணு சேரப்போவுதுன்னு கேட்டுட்டாராம்??!!"

Invalid Marriages, - * She got married in an urfi marriage without her family’s knowledge and now they want to arrange a marriage for her

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What should a girl do who was a virgin and married herself off in an ‘urfi marriage to a man who is already married, at the hands of a sheikh and with two witnesses and the family of the sheikh in his house, with a simple mahr that she accepted but without any papers (it was only verbal)? Her father is dead and she is grown up and does not have any adult brothers. The man consummated the marriage with her and had intercourse with her, and they lived together for a while in secret like a married couple, without the knowledge of either family. After that she found out that this marriage could not continue for fear that her family would always object to the idea. Her family are determined to marry her off to another man of whom they approve and they are determined to ahead with this marriage without knowing of her secret. What should the girl do with regard to the first marriage? Is the marriage valid and does she have to get divorced from him? How should the divorce be done? Is it by speaking in front of the same witnesses or what? When she gets married to another man, does she have to tell him that she was married before, even though she is going to have an operation to repair the hymen so as to avoid any shame, whether she marries him or not?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
According to the majority of fuqaha’, in order for a marriage to be valid it is essential for the woman’s wali (guardian) to be present. The wali is her father, then her son – if she has a son, then her brothers, then her brother’s son, then her paternal uncles, then the sons of her paternal uncles, and so on in order of closeness among the male relatives on her father’s side. If there is no one, then the ruler or the qaadi (judge) is her guardian, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no marriage without a guardian.” Narrated by Abu Dawood (2085), al-Tirmidhi(1101) and Ibn Maajah (1881) from the hadeeth of Abu Moosa al-Ash’ari; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Tirmidhi.
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who gets married without the permission of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, and if there is a dipute, then the ruler is the guardian of the one who has no guardian.” Narrated by Ahmad (24417), Abu Dawood (2083) and al-Tirmidhi (1102); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami’(2709).
Based on this, this girl’s marriage that was done in this manner is not valid, because it was done without the presence or consent of her guardian. The basic principle is that they should be separated, and there is no need for a divorce because the marriage was not valid in the first place. But as some scholars regard marriage without a wali as valid (even though this is a weak view), then divorce should be done. It is sufficient for the husband to speak the words of divorce, and it is not necessary to bring the witnesses who witnessed the marriage.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If a woman gets married in an invalid manner, it is not permissible for someone else to marry her until she is divorced or the marriage is annulled. End quote fromal-Mughni(7/9).
If he divorces her and her ‘iddah has ended, then it is permissible for her to marry someone else.
Secondly:
This girl has to tell the future husband of her first marriage. It is not permissible for her to have an operation to repair her hymen because that is deceiving the husband. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever deceives is not one of us.” Narrated by Muslim (101).
This is even more important if it says in the marriage contract that the bride is a virgin, as is the case in the country of the woman who is asking this question.
It does not matter how much embarrassment this will cause for her. She is the one who has brought it on herself and entered into this haraam marriage which is shameful in the view of others, so she has to bear the consequences.
But if she repents to Allaah and turns to Him, Allaah will grant her a way out.
We ask Allaah to help us all to obey Him and please Him.
And Allaah knows best.

Comedy

" நம்ம மன்னருக்கு நாய் அடி, பேயடி, பாய் அடி கிடைச்சுதாம்!"
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" அதென்ன பாய் அடி?"
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" ஒருநாள் மட்டும் மகாராணிய பாயில படுக்கச் சொல்லீட்டு மன்னர் கட்டுல்ல படுத்தாராம்,
மகாராணி பாயாலே சாத்து சாத்துன்னு சாத்திட்டாங்களாம்!"

Invalid Marriages, - * This is a shighaar (quid pro quo)marriage and is not permissible

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I am a young man and I did the marriage contract with my cousin (the daughter of my maternal aunt), but I do not love her, I love her sister. But I was forced into that because her brother would not marry my sister unless I married the one whom I do not love. The girl knows that I cannot stand her, but her family insisted that she marry me. Now I do not know what I should do.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Allaah has honoured man with reason and He has given him free will to choose that to which his religion, reason and character make him inclined, so that he may rise above the promptings of whims and desires and of the shaytaan. So the one who has been honoured in this way should not be heedless and respond to the desires of those who are around him and their hateful customs.
In the Sunnah there is a prohibition on the kind of marriage that you have entered into, which is called nikaah al-shighaar (quid pro quo marriage).
It was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade shighaar. Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5112) and Muslim (1415).
A shighaar (quid pro quo) marriage is when it is stipulated that each man will marry the daughter, sister or ward of the other, whether there is any mahr or not.
It says inal-Mudawwanah(2/98):
What do you think if someone says “Marry your daughter to me for one hundred dinars on the basis that I will marry my daughter to you for one hundred dinars”? Malik disliked that and regarded it as a kind of shighaar.
This is also indicated by the report narrated by Abu Dawood (2075) and others from ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn Hormuz, that al-‘Abbaas ibn ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abbaas gave his daughter in marriage to ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn al-Hakam, and ‘Abd al-Rahmaan gave his daughter in marriage to him, and they both gave dowries. Mu’aawiyah ibn Abi Sufyaan wrote to Marwaan ibn al-Hakam telling him to separate them, and he said in his letter: This is shighaar which was forbidden by the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
Some of the scholars regarded shighaar as an invalid marriage which cannot be gone ahead with.
It says inFataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah(18/427):
If a man gives his ward in marriage to a man on the basis that the other will give his ward to him in marriage, this is the shighaar marriage which was forbidden by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). This is what some people call an “exchange” marriage, and it is an invalid marriage, whether a dowry is given or not, and whether there is mutual consent or not.
But if one man proposes marriage to the ward of another man, and the other proposes marriage to the ward of the first, without any stipulation, and the marriages are done with the consent of both women and all the other conditions of marriage are met, then there is no dispute concerning that, and in that case it is not a shighaar marriage. End quote.
See also the answer to question no. 11515.
Thus it is clear that you have done something that is forbidden in Islam as well as being reprehensible in social and psychological terms.
That is because marriage should start with consent and be entered into by choice. Islam is keen to ensure the consent of both parties, to such an extent that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A virgin should not be married off until her permission has been sought.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5136) and Muslim (1419).
If marriage is not done with consent then it is usually doomed to failure, so how about if the husband dislikes his wife as is the case here?
Even more serious than this is the fact that you love the sister of the one with whom you have done the marriage contract. Your dislike of the one with whom you did the marriage contract and your love for her sister means that your nafs (self) will call you to consider haraam things, and the shaytaan will find a great opportunity to make sin appealing to you. It will also deprive you of happiness in your marriage and contentment and love between you and your wife.
The reason for that is going against the laws of Allaah and entering into a shighaar marriage.
Our advice to you is not to go ahead with this marriage and not to respond to any attempt to make excuses. You should explain to your sister’s husband that connecting one marriage contract to the other is haraam, and renders both contracts invalid. He should keep his wife, but at the same time he should do the marriage contract again, because the contract is invalid due to the shighaar. If he refuses and insists on leaving her, then Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“But if they separate (by divorce), Allaah will provide abundance for everyone of them from His Bounty. And Allaah is Ever All‑Sufficient for His creatures’ needs, All‑Wise”
[al-Nisa’ 4:130]
I remind you to fear Allaah and urge you not to transgress His sacred limits by trying to get in touch with that girl whom you love. If you cannot marry her in a proper manner, then you have to cut off all ties with her completely.
We ask Allaah to guide you.
And Allaah knows best.