Welcome to Islam, - Monogamy and polygyny

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The question remains why a male-dominated society should be so opposed to polygyny when such a large number of its married members practice a form of it by engaging in illicit or casual relationships. Some males self-righteously assert that monogamy is maintained to protect the rights of women. But, since when has the western male been concerned about women's rights?
Western society is riddled through and through with socio-economic practices which oppressed women and led to the upsurge of women's liberation movements in recent years, from suffragettes of the early nineteen hundreds to those of recent times. The reality is that monogamy protects the males right to play around without any responsibility, since the incidence of infidelity among them is usually much higher than among females.
The introduction of birth control pills and easy access to abortions opened the door to illicit sex and, resultantly, the female became tempted to join in on the 'fun'. In spite of her natural and general inclination towards meaningful relationships, she became caught up in the so-called sexual revolution. However, she is still the one who suffers from the side effects of the pill, coil and the loop or the trauma of abortion in much the same way as she suffered in the past - the shame of childbirth out of wedlock.
Meanwhile, the male continues to enjoy himself worry-free, aside from the recent plagues of venereal disease, herpes and AIDS, which are now causing many to reassess their sexual habits. Males in general, continue to be protected by monogamy, while prostitutes, call girls, mistresses, secretaries, models, actresses, store clerks, waitresses and girlfriends remain as their playground.
The fact is that polygyny is vehemently opposed by male-dominated Western society because it would force men into fidelity. It would encourage them to take socio-economic responsibility for the fulfilment of their polygynous desires and provide protection for the weaker members of society, women and children, from mental and physical abuse. Some might argue that if the stigma of illegitimacy were removed, the problem could be solved without having to resort to the legalisation of polygyny.
However, every child has a natural desire to know its parents and the resulting chaos in ancestry could easily lead to incestuous relationships. Females have a vested interest in institutional polygyny because of the obvious socio-economic protection it provides, for the preponderance of females in the world is an established fact. The death-rate at birth is much higher for boys, and women as a whole live longer than men; not to mention the large numbers of men who die daily in various wars around the world.
Thus, although the ratio may vary from country to country, the results are still the same - women outnumber men. This apparent imbalance has been further aggravated by the fact that homosexuality appears to be more frequent among men than among women. Hence, there are more females competing for a diminishing number of males. Consequently, there will always remain a large segment of women unable to fulfil their sexual and psychological needs through legitimate means in monogamous societies. Their presence in an increasingly permissive society also contributes to the breakdown of Western family structure.
A strong family structure is an absolute requirement for a strong and healthy society. And the only way that the family can remain strong and responsive to the needs of its male and female members is through the Islamic form of marriage, of which polygyny is a part.
The Monogamous marriage system, clearly, does not take into consideration the real needs of human society. It limits possibilities for both men and women while claiming to protect the latter. Instead of providing protection for women, it provides a hypocritical shield for men to hide behind while favouring a wife to the detriment of a girlfriend or vice versa. Islam has a complete marriage system, which takes into account all the human variables and provides men and women with viable options.
To deny the validity and legality of polygyny is tantamount to denying the comprehensiveness of the Islaamic marriage system and the wisdom of the Divine Decree. It is not possible that everything in life should happen according to our feelings and desires. Nor is it possible to live without experiencing pain.
On the contrary, Allaah has stated in the Noble Quran that Muslims shall be tested. He says what means:"And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient."]Quran 2:155[ and:"Do the people think that they will be left to say: 'We believe' and they will not be tried?"]Quran 29:2[
Neither tests nor pain, whether physical or emotional, can be avoided in this life. Nor can any aspect of the Islaamic system be negated merely to justify a particular individual's or group's opinions. Although polygyny may be painful for some women, it is also beneficial for other women and society as a whole. Muslims must accept the whole of Allaah's message and submit to the fact that Allaah's Wisdom is superior to our opinions.

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Welcome to Islam, - Islam and Polygamy -II

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Polygamy, in the sense of having more than one wife at the same time, has been one of the chief issues due to which severe criticism has been directed against Islam. Non-Muslims decry Islam for permitting polygamy and allowing a man to have up to four wives at the same time, thus debasing women and slighting their status in society.
It should be made clear that polygamy is allowed in Islam only as an exception. It is succinctly so stated in the Glorious Quran )which means(:"And if you fear that you cannot act equitably towards orphans, then marry such women as seem good to you, two and three and four; but if you fear that you will not do justice )between them(, then )marry( one only."]Quran 4:3[
This is the only verse in the Glorious Quran that speaks of polygamy and it is evident that it does not enjoin polygamy; it only permits it bound by certain conditions. First, polygamy is allowed permissible in general, but it becomes more recommended only when there are orphans to be cared for by an uncle or a relative, that relative may marry the mother of these orphans if he feels that he cannot do them justice unless he is bound by marriage to their mother.
Such a marriage would enable him to care for the orphans and have free access to them without fearing social slander. This is an acceptable social condition that caters for the welfare of the orphans and the dignity of women.
Another condition is imposed in the same verse, which limits this marriage to the man who feels that he can do justice to his wives. He should provide them with similar dwelling places, similar food and clothing and give them the same physical attention. If he feels unable to do so, he should be satisfied with one wife.
The value of this permission for polygamy becomes evident in times of war when men die on the battlefields and women are left behind to feed and care for their children. Many of these women may not possess the qualifications for the humblest job. The last resort for such women would be prostitution with all its negative physical, social, moral and psychological consequences.
When Islam permits polygamy, it preserves a woman's dignity and humanity and cares for the social moral and economic well-being of orphans. The same principle applies when the number of women exceeds that of men in society. This would lead to moral depravity, which threatens the very essence of civilization.
It may be argued that the modern State can make other arrangements for the maintenance of widows and orphans. That may be true, but the State cannot provide them with a family life; in Islam, the family is considered the real source from where all the good qualities of love and affection spring, which are the greatest asset of society and civilization. Even if it be “half a home” that the woman and children find in a polygamous family, it is better than having no home at all.
Monogamy is without doubt the right form of life under normal conditions, but when abnormal conditions are brought about by the presence of more females than males monogamy fails, and it is only through a limited form of polygamy that this difficulty is faced.
It may be further argued that polygamy, which has been instituted by Islam as an exception and a remedy, has been largely abused by sensual people. That is true, but there are people in every society who abuse any institution, however necessary that may be to the healthy growth of human society. In countries where polygamy is not allowed, the sensuality of man has invented a hundred other ways of giving vent to his carnal desires and these comprise a far greater threat to the security and welfare of society than the abuse of polygamy.
Rather than debasing women or belittling their status in society as some feminists claim, Islam recognizes the position of women to be equitable to that of man when it comes to worship and accountability. Allaah Almighty Says )what means(:"And whoever does good deeds, whether male or female, and he )or she( is a believer-these shall enter the Garden."]Quran 4:124[
In some cases, polygamy is a practical solution and a better alternative. When a man's wife suffers from a chronic disease and fails to respond to her husband's physical needs, Islam offers two alternatives: divorce or polygamy. Many wives would commend the second alternative, as it saves them the humiliation of being without any means of income, particularly if they have no jobs to support themselves.
The same thing applies when it is proven that the wife is sterile and the husband longs to be a father. According to Islam, he can divorce his wife or take another wife who can bear him children. The second alternative may prove most convenient to the sterile wife.
The question may be raised, what if the husband is sterile or suffers from a chronic incurable disease, would the wife entertain the same right and have a second husband? The answer is no, for practical reasons. Most of the societies all over the world are patriarchal where the father assumes the leading role. If the mother assumes the lead, this would be a backward step to the savage matriarchal age.
This system is still dominant in a few backward tribes in Africa, Latin America andAsia. Besides the confusion that would prevail in the household as a result of having more than one husband, there would emerge the problem of relating the children to the father, who can decide who is the real father of the child if there are more than one husband? Problems of inheritance and moral values would emerge in due time.
Islam forbids a woman from having more than one husband at the same time. However, if the husband is sterile or suffers from a chronic disease that prevents them from consummating a conjugal life, the wife may ask for divorce and marry another man.
In societies where women outnumber men, there would be two alternatives: polygamy or prostitution. It is natural for every human being to seek a mate for various psychological, social, economic and sexual reasons. If that mate were not available due to certain reasons such as females outnumbering males, monogamy would not solve the difficulty. The supernumerary women would seek physical satisfaction in adultery and economic support in prostitution.
If society permits polygamy, such a woman would enjoy a dignified life where her physical and economic needs are satisfied without losing self-respect or social acceptance. Her children would enjoy the protection and the care of a father. It may be argued that in such case she would have “half a husband”, but that is better than having no husband, no protection and no roof over her head.
]Summarized from: "I

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Welcome to Islam, - Islam and non-Muslim communities

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It has always been said that the attitude of non-Muslim communities towards Islamic rule is a critical and delicate question, which many people hesitate to discuss for fear of causing dissension between Muslims and non-Muslims.
Let us be frank with the Christians of the Islamic East and put to them these questions: What do they fear from the rule of Islam? Are they afraid of the holy texts of Islam or of the manner of their application? As for the provisions, we may quote the Holy Quran )what means(:“God forbids you not, with regard to those who fight you not for )your( Faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them, for God loves those who are just.”]Quran 60: 8[.
And )what means(: “The food of the people of the Book is lawful unto you and yours is lawful unto them. )Lawful unto you in marriage( are )not only( chaste women who are believers, but chaste women among the people of the book”]Quran 5:5[.
We should also refer to the general principle in Islamic jurisprudence: “They shall have the same obligations and rights as we”. The Islamic holy texts enjoin Muslims to treat non-Muslims in a kind and fair manner. Apart from the rights and obligations involving worship, they are equal to Muslims with respect to all other rights and obligations related to social life and the rights of citizens. In addition, Islamic faith strives to strengthen the links connecting the non-Muslims to visit them and to eat their food, which is the custom of close friends.
Moreover, Islam tries to make the relationship grow closer by permitting inter-marriage with people of the Book, the strongest social bond, between Muslims and non-Muslims. As to the practical application of the Islamic holy texts, we quote a European Christian, who cannot be accused of bias or prejudice, Sir T.W. Arnold in his book The Preaching of Islam:
“That force was not the determining factor in these conversions, may be judged from the amicable relations that existed between the Christian and the Muslim Arabs. Muhammad )may Allaah exalt his mention( himself had entered into treaty with several Christian tribes, promising them his protection and guaranteeing them the free exercise of their religion and to their clergy undisturbed enjoyment of their old rights and authority”. )pp. 47-48(.
He goes on to say:
“From the examples given above of the toleration extended towards the Christian Arabs by the victorious Muslims of the first century of the Hijrah and continued by succeeding generations, we may surely infer that those Christian tribes that did embrace Islam, did so of their own choice and free will”. )P.51(.
“When the Muslim army reached the valley of Jordan and Abu `Ubaydah pitched his camp at Fihl, the Christian inhabitants of the country wrote to the Arabs, saying: “O Muslims, we prefer you to the Byzantines, though they are of our own faith because you keep better faith with us and are more merciful to us and refrain from doing us injustice and your rule over us is better than theirs, for they have robbed us of our goods and our homed”. )P.55(.
He also tells us: “Such was the state of feeling inSyriaduring the campaign of 633-639 CE in which the Arabs gradually drove the Roman army out of the province. And when Damascus, in 637 CE set the example of making terms with the Arabs, and thus secured immunity from plunder and other favorable conditions, the rest of the cities of Syria were not slow to follow. Emessa, Arethusa, Hieropolis and other towns entered into treaties whereby they became tributary to the Arabs.
Even the patriarch ofJerusalemsurrendered the city on similar terms. The fear of religious compulsion on the part of the heretical emperor made the promise of Muslim toleration appear more attractive than the connection with theRoman Empireand a Christian government, and after the first terrors caused by the passage of an invading army, there succeeded a profound revulsion of feeling in favor of the Arab conquerors.” )p.55(. This is the evidence given by a Christian scholar on Islam. What is it then that the Christians fear from Islamic rule?
It may be that the Christians are afraid of Muslim fanaticism. If this is true, it seems that they have no idea of what fanaticism is. Here are a few examples of fanaticism. Courts of inquisition set up by the Christian Church were primarily meant to exterminate the Muslims of Spain. The said courts tortured Muslims in a monstrous way, which had never been experienced before. People were burned alive, their fingernails were pulled off, their eyes were put out and their limbs were amputated. This torture was inflicted in order to force the people to change their religion and adopt a particular Christian creed.
Have the Christians of Islamic East ever suffered such treatment?
Massacres are carried out for the extermination of Muslims in Europe,Yugoslavia,Albania,Russiaor countries under European rule such asNorth Africa,Somalia,Kenya,Zanzibaror in other countries likeIndiaandMalaya. Such massacres are staged sometimes on the pretext of the purging of ranks and sometimes for the maintenance of peace and security.
Another significant example is the treatment of Muslims inEthiopia, which has ancient historical, geographical, cultural and religious links withEgypt. It has a mixed population of Muslims and Christians. Although Muslims account for 35 to 65 percent of the total population there is not a single school where Islamic faith or Arabic is taught.
Private schools, which the Muslims open at their own expenses, are subjected to exorbitant taxes and inconveniences that lead to their closing, thus disheartening those who may think of opening new schools. In this way, Islamic teaching is confined to a primitive way of teaching.
Until very recently – just before the Italian invasion – a Muslim who could not pay a debt to his Christian creditor was taken in slavery by the Ethiopian Christians. The Muslim was caught, sold and tortured within sight of the government. It goes without saying that there is not a single Muslim in the cabinet or in any key post to represent one-third of the population. Have the Christians of the Islamic world ever experienced such a treatment? Would they accept reciprocal treatment?
That is real fanaticism.
The Communists believe that the real existence of man is essentially an economic existence. If so, have the Christians living in Islamic countries ever been denied the right to acquire and dispose of property or to amass wealth? Have they ever been denied, on account of their religious belief, the right to have education, to join public service or promotion to higher public posts?
As for the moral and spiritual existence, it should be stressed that the Christians living under Islamic rule have never been subjected to any form of religious persecution -- with the exception of the very rare incidents engendered by the British colonialists for sowing dissension and diversion. It is alleged that the imposition of tribute on non-Muslims is the result of religious discrimination. The best refutation of this baseless accusation lies in the words of T.W. Arnold, who says: “On the other hand, when the Egyptian peasants, although Muslim in faith, were made exempt from military service, a tax was imposed upon them as on the Christians in lieu thereof”.
“As stated above, the Jizyah was levied on the able-bodied males, in lieu of the military service they would have been called upon to perform had they been Musalmans; and it is very noticeable that when any Christian people served in the Muslim army, they were exempted from the payment of this tax. Such was the case with the tribe of al-Jurajimah, a Christian tribe in the neighborhood ofAntioch, who made peace with the Muslims, promising them to be their allies and fight on their side in battle, on condition that they should not be called upon to pay Jizyah and should receive their proper share of the booty”.
From this it is clear that the imposition of tribute is not the result of any religious discrimination. The truth is that the tribute was imposed on all those who did not take part in military service regardless of their religious belief. It would be useful to refer in this respect to the following Holy verse )which means(:“Fight those who believe not in God nor the Last Day, nor hold that forbidden which hath been forbidden by God and His Apostle, nor acknowledge the Religion of Truth )even if they are( of the People of the Book, until they pay the Jizyah with willing submission and feel themselves subdued”.]Quran 9: 29[.
It should be pointed out that this verse refers to non-Muslims who wage war against Islam. It does not apply to the non-Muslims living in Islamic countries.
In conclusion, I should like to warn that the seeds of dissention between Muslims and non-Muslims living in Islamic countries are sown by colonialists as well as by Communists. The Communist devils address each community in accordance with its particular aspirations.
They address the working classes saying: “If you adopt Communism we shall hand over all factories to you”; while speaking to peasants, they promise to give them the lands. On talking to unemployed graduates they say: “If you become Communists you will get the jobs that fit in with your qualifications”.
As for the youth suffering from sexual repression, the Communists promise them a free society, where every one can act as one likes without intervention by law or subjection to traditions. The Communists address Christians in the following manner: “If you adopt Communism we shall destroy Islam, the religion that discriminates among people on account of their religion”. However, the Quran says )what means(:“It is a grievous thing that comes from their mouths as a saying, for, what they say is nothing but falsehood”]Quran 18: 5[.
It cannot be said that Islam distinguishes among people on account of their religion, because Islam confers the essential rights on all people without any distinction. Islam brings all people together on a purely human basis and at the same time guarantees them absolute freedom to adopt the religion of their choice, under its own care and protection.
Besides, as the Christians of the East are also anxious to retain their historical links with Muslims and protect their mutual interests, let us hope that they would not listen to these propagandists or dissenters.

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Dought & clear, - Is it permissible forus to gather onNew Year's Eve to remember Allah, offer supplication (du‘aa’) and read Qur'aan?

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This is a message that I have seen a lot on the Internet, but in fact I have not sent it to anyone because I am not sure if it is an innovation (bid‘ah) or not. Is it permissible to spread it and will we be rewarded for doing so, or is this not permissible because it is an innovation?
“In sha’ Allah, at 12 midnight on New Year's Eve we will all pray two rak‘ahs, or read Qur'aan, or remember our Lord, or offer du‘aa’, because if our Lord looks at the Earth at a time when most of the world is disobeying Him, he will find that the Muslims are still obeying Him. By Allah, you have to send this message to everyone you know, because the more our numbers increase, the more our Lord will be pleased.”
Please advise me, may Allah bless you.
Praise be to Allaah.
You have done very well not to spread this message which is widespread on many websites on which uneducated attitudes and ignorance prevail.
With regard to those who published this message and want the Muslims to pray and recite dhikr, we do not doubt that their intentions are good and great, especially if they want acts of obedience and worship to be done at a time when sins are being committed. But this good and righteous intention does not make the actions legitimate, sound or acceptable in sharee‘ah. Rather it is essential that the action be in accordance with sharee‘ah in terms of its reason, type, quantity, manner, time and place. For a detailed discussion on these six categories, please see the answer to question number 21519. In this manner the Muslim may distinguish between legitimate and innovated actions.
We may list the reasons why this message should not be spread by noting a number of points, including the following:
1.
There have been Jaahili special occasions and special occasions of the disbelievers and misguided since the time of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) until the present time, but we have not seen any text from the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) which encourages us to do acts of worship and obedience at the time when others are committing acts of evil and disobedience, or to do prescribed actions at the time when innovated actions are being done. There is no report of any of the well-known imams recommending doing such a thing.
This comes under the heading of dealing with sin by means of innovation, as happened in the case of responding to the innovation of mourning on the occasion of ‘Ashoora’, as done by the Raafidis, by introducing the innovation of spending a great deal and making a show of joy and happiness.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
As for taking the days of calamities as occasions for mourning, this is not part of the religion of the Muslims; rather it is closer to the religion of Jaahiliyyah. Thus they missed out on the virtue and reward of fasting on this day. Some other people introduced things on the basis of fabricated hadeeths for which there is no basis, such as the virtue of doing ghusl on this day, or applying kohl to the eyes, or shaking hands. These and similar things are innovations, all of which are makrooh. What is recommended is to fast on this day.
There are also well known reports about spending generously on one's family on this day, such as the hadeeth of Ibraaheem ibn Muhammad ibn al-Muntashir from his father, who said: We heard that the one who spends generously on his family on the day of ‘Ashoora’, Allah will give him in abundance for the rest of the year. This was narrated by Ibn ‘Uyaynah, but the fact that he said ‘we heard that…’ and it is not known who said it indicates that the isnaad is munqati’ (interrupted). It is most likely that this was fabricated because of the hatred that appeared between the Naasibis and Raafidis. The Raafidis regarded the day of ‘Ashoora’ as a day of mourning, so the Naasibis fabricated reports about it which indicated that one should spend generously on this day and take it as an Eid. Both views are false.
It is not permissible for anyone to change anything in Islam for the sake of anyone. Expressing joy and happiness on the day of ‘Ashoora’ and spending generously on this day are all innovations that were introduced as a reaction against the Raafidis.
Iqtida’ al-Siraat al-Mustaqeem, p. 300, 301
We have quoted some other valuable words of Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah in the answer to question number 4033.
2.
There are special times for offering du’aa’ and prayers as prescribed in Islam. The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) encouraged us to offer du’aa’ at these times, such as the last third of the night, which is the time when the Lord, may He be glorified and exalted, descends to the nearest heaven. Encouraging people to do that at a time when no saheeh text has been narrated concerning it is introducing legislation concerning the reason or the time, and going against sharee’ah with regard to either of them is sufficient to deem the action to be a reprehensible innovation, so how about if it has to do with both of them?!
In the answer to question number 8375, we were asked about giving charity to poor families at the time of the Gregorian New Year, and we replied that it is not allowed. Among the things that we said there was the following:
If we Muslims want to give in charity, we can give to those who really deserve it, and we should not aim to do that specifically on the days of the kaafirs’ festivals. We should do that whenever there is a need, and make the most of good and great occasions such as the month of Ramadaan and the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, and other virtuous occasions when rewards are multiplied. End quote.
The basic principle for a Muslim is to follow (the Sunnah) and not introduce innovations. Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Say (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم to mankind): ‘If you (really) love Allaah, then follow me (i.e. accept Islamic Monotheism, follow the Qur’aan and the Sunnah), Allaah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.’
32. Say (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم): ‘Obey Allaah and the Messenger (Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم).” But if they turn away, then Allaah does not like the disbelievers’”
[Aal ‘Imraan 3:21, 32].
Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
This verse states that everyone who claims to love Allah but is not following the path of Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) is lying in his claim unless he follows the path or religion of Prophet Muhammad (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) in all his words and deeds, as it is proven inal-Saheehthat the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever introduces an action that is not part of this matter of ours will have it rejected.”
Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 2/32
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
You should love the Messenger more than you love yourselves, and your faith is not complete unless you do that. Do not introduce into his religion anything that is not part of it. What the seekers of knowledge should do is explain to the people and tell them: Occupy yourselves with legitimate and sound acts of worship; remember Allah; send blessings upon the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) at all times; establish regular prayer; pay zakaah; and be kind towards the Muslims at all times.
Liqaa’aat al-Baab al-Maftooh, 35/5
3.
You are forgetting to do what you are obliged to do with regard to these sins and evils, which is enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, offering sincere advice to those who are going against Islam, and focusing on individual acts of worship when there are other communal acts of disobedience and evil which you should not do.
What we think is that it is haraam to spread such messages and that it is an innovation to adhere to these acts of worship on such occasions. It is sufficient for you to warn against haraam celebrations on occasions of shirk and innovation. You will be rewarded for that and you will be doing your duty with regard to these sins.
And Allah knows best.

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