The ignored sickness: An unpredictable state of mind

• What is the underlying cause of the way that some people suddenly
become infuriated or emotional and start weeping or behave in some
unexpected way in the face of day-to-day events?
• Why is it essential to avoid falling prey to this disorder, which
mainly damages the victim himself and is generally described as
someone "having a hair trigger?"
• What must be done to free oneself from the condition?
Some people live their lives according to rules they themselves have
invented. These people can easily make concessions regarding these
rules when it comes to their own worldly desires. Because they have no
guide who will direct the course of their lives, ensure they maintain
a stable character, and whom they have a total belief. For that
reason, their characters are prone to sudden variations. Among the
distinguishing features of such people are, for instance, their
suddenly slamming doors and acting aggressively towards people around
them or shouting in a loud voice although they had been sitting
perfectly calmly just five minutes ago, or suddenly bursting into
tears having just said how happy they were.
The fundamental reason for this behavioural defect that all believers
must scrupulously avoid, is that such people fail to frame their
behaviour, speech, actions, thoughts and reactions to events in the
light of the moral values of the Qur'an.
The Obstacles to a Balanced Nature
I. Following One's Worldly Desires
In the Qur'an, Almighty God reveals that people have been created with
a tendency towards selfish passions. If someone permits his worldly
concerns to rule him, then all his behaviour will be shaped by selfish
wishes. These selfish desires will prevent him displaying a stable,
consisted and balanced nature. As a result of the prompting of worldly
concerns he may suddenly become enraged, or emotional, or sulky, or
jealous and start taking sudden decisions in the light of these
emotions. His character will always come as a surprise, therefore, to
those around him. There will be no consistency between one moment and
another. His state of mind, thoughts, feeling, decisions and
perspectives can change at any moment. Because of his unbalanced and
inconsistent behaviour, such a person will always inspire feeling of
unease and distrust in those around him.
One often comes across such characters in societies that are far from
religious moral values. People with such a character are far removed
from the mindset bestowed by Qur'anic moral virtues and therefore
permit themselves to be ruled by their own desires. This, in turn,
distances them from reason and encourages unbalanced behaviour. In
such situations, Muslims' guide is the Qur'an. In the Qur'an, God
warns us that worldly passions will always encourage one to evil and
that Shaytan will oblige people to behave inconsistently, irrationally
and emotionally, as dictated by their desires. He also imparts the
glad tidings that people who adopt the Qur'an as their guide in the
face of this, however, and who act according to the stirring of their
consciences, will achieve the ideal character and enjoy superiority in
both this world and the hereafter.
A believer achieves this strong and superior character by following
the path shown by God. Since the Qur'an is his guide, his behaviour
and reactions in the face of events are always shaped according to
Qur'anic moral values. How he will behave, his perspective on events
and the logic he adopts will never come as a surprise to those around
him. His mind, conscience, behaviour and speech always reflect the
stability required by Qur'anic virtue, and his nature is therefore
always to be trusted.
II. Acting Emotionally
Emotionality is not regarded as undesirable in societies oblivious to
religious moral values. Indeed, it is generally believed that a
certain amount of emotionality in a person's make-up is an important
attribute. According to that way of thinking, the behaviour caused by
emotionality is human feelings that need to be let out. For that
reason, character defects stemming from emotionality, such as
"touchiness, dissatisfaction, sulking, weeping, an introverted state
of mind, apathy, jealousy or anger," are encouraged by suggesting they
are "emotions representing human nature." Nothing could be more wrong,
however.
Emotionality that is widespread in societies oblivious to the moral
values of the Qur'an lead to people having weak characters. Since
people react to events in the light of their own emotions, they tend
to act irrationally. They become unable to think logically and
accurately or to make sound deductions. And this leads to people being
unpredictable and inflicting material and psychological damage on
themselves and those around them.
However, since the Qur'an rules the whole of a believer's life and
character, he possesses the most accurate knowledge regarding the
promptings of one's passions and how to combat it. He knows that
emotionality clouds one's reason, prevents one thinking straight and
seeing the truth, and also makes one weak and lacking in resistance.
He is also aware that the sentimentality also equated with this weak
character, grieving, weeping, ranting and raving, anger, jealousy and
self-centredness, are all traits that will ill-befit him. That is
because all such behaviour must be avoided as it is displeasing to
God.
The Solution to an Unpredictable Character is Love of God
Sincere devotion to God, genuine submission, and knowing that
everything transpires under His control and that everything is for the
best prevent one falling prey to one's emotions and behaving badly.
Because of his powerful love and fear of God, the believer
scrupulously avoids all forms of behaviour that might result from
emotionality. He aims, with all his behaviour, character and lofty
virtues to be a role model for others, as revealed by God in the
Qur'an (Surah Furqan, 74). And by God's leave, this endows him with a
strong character that never collapses under any circumstances.
Believers regulate their whole lives according to Qur'anic moral
virtues. They know that avoiding the defects of personality prevalent
in societies devoid of faith and exhibiting a strong character will
serve as a role model for others and behave in complete awareness of
that responsibility. As God reveals in the Qur'an in the words"It is
the people who are safe-guarded from the avarice of their own selves
who are successful"(Surat al-Hashr, 9), they strive to cleanse their
desires of evil. God has revealed that in return for that effort
believers will enjoy peace, blessings and happiness in this world and
the hereafter:"What is with you runs out but what is with Allah goes
on for ever. Those who were steadfast will be recompensed according to
the best of what they did. Anyone who acts rightly, male or female,
being a believer, We will give them a good life and We will recompense
them according to the best of what they did."(Surat an-Nahl, 96-97)
All the negative behaviour manifesting an unpredictable state of mind
stem from defects of faith and a failure to fully comprehend certain
realities.
People who are prone to enormous distress, who fall prey to weeping or
rage or jealousy, or who sulk in silence and become totally
introverted are unaware of God's might, that He has created all things
with goodness, wisdom and justice, that He can perform whatever He
wishes whenever He wishes, and that He will heed people's prayers.
All sorrow, anger and jealousy stem from weakness of faith and errors
originating from that perspective.

Looking at events from the future

A believer's awareness that he is being tested leads him to look at
events from the future. But what does "looking at events from the
future" actually mean?
However great the troubles and difficulties confronting a person may
be, the situation is definitely only temporary. Someone may be falsely
accused of a crime and subjected to injustice, for example. Yet there
will definitely come a time when the truth emerges. Even if the
suffering of a person does not come to an end in this world, those
responsible for that injustice will receive due retribution on the Day
of Judgement. In the same way, the person who suffered injustice can
hope for a splendid reward for his patience on that day. Time passes
very quickly and, like everything else, this state of affairs will
come to an end in the mere blink of an eye. In addition, the Qur'an
reveals that hardship comes with ease for Muslims:
For truly with hardship comes ease; truly with hardship comes ease.
(Surat Al-Inshirah, 5-6)
A believer trusts in our Lord's infinite justice, expects the ease
that will follow hardship, and never falls into despair in the face of
any situation. He remembers that the difficulties he experiences will
re-appear before him as delights in this world and in the next.
A Muslim knows that he is watching the destiny. One delightful
aspect of this secret is that he watches everything in spirit of
trusting Allah, submission and resignation.
We must not forget that this is a state of mind unique to true
believers in God, one that only those who are completely submitted to
destiny can fully experience. People who are heedless of religion, on
the other hand, fall prey to despair, fear and stress because of their
failure to submit to destiny, and imagine that there is no way out for
them. Since they have no hopes or expectation for the Hereafter, they
are always restless and troubled. The state of mind of such people is
described as follows in another verse:
When Allah desires to guide someone, He expands his breast to Islam.
When He desires to misguide someone, He makes his breast narrow and
constricted as if he were climbing up into the sky. That is how Allah
defiles those who do not believe. (Surat al-An'am, 125)
This troubled state of mind described in the verse is a self-inflicted
wound that stems from these people's failure to submit to the destiny
created by God. The fact that God, the Omniscient and Almighty,
directs a person's destiny and rules all things is a great blessing
for a believer. However, people whose faith is weak or who have no
faith at all are unable to comprehend the value of that blessing. They
are therefore unable to resign themselves to destiny and are troubled
at every moment of their lives. This condition is actually a spiritual
reward for lack of trust in Allah imposed in the life of this world.
These people merely wrong themselves.
Allah does not wrong people in any way; rather it is people who wrong
themselves. (Surah Yunus, 44)

Fathwa, - It is safer to clean urine drops with water than with a dry tissue

Question
asslam u alikum sometimes while using bathroom ,small urine drops get
on the edge of the commode which i clean with dry tissue.after istinja
my wet thigh touches the same spot which i have cleaned with dry
tissue. plz tell me if my thigh is pure.this thing is causing me to
worry.thanks
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad,
is His Slave and Messenger.
Muslim scholars hold different opinions regarding the purity of the
smooth surfaces with wiping. Some of them view that it will be pure
and that opinion was adopted byShaykh Ibn Taymiyyah. According to that
opinion, when you wipe the commode with dry tissue, this is enough to
purify it.
Other scholars view that it cannot be purified with that and this is
the opinion of the majority of scholars. According to them, the
commode will not be purified by just wiping it with a dry tissue,
rather water should be poured on the place affected by urine drops.
So, if that impure place touches a wet or moist thing, that thing
becomes impure according to many scholars. But, if you wish to follow
those who adopt the first opinion which states that the purification
has been done, then there is no blame on you.
However, what you should do is to pour water on the place you know
that urine drops affected or wash the parts of your body that touched
it while it is wet to be on the safe side and be certain of
purification. That is if you are certain that urine has already
affected that place and that your body has already touched it while it
was wet. But if you only have doubt about that, then do not pay any
attention to that doubt because caring about such doubts may cause
Waswasah )obsessive whispers(. Moreover, the basic principle is that
things are pure until they are certainty proven otherwise.
Allaah Knows best.

Fathwa, - His wife's bleeding resumed after he had intercourse with her

Question
Assalamu Alaikkum, My wife had bleeding)its like menustration( very
earlier than )14 days( her period time and after two days its stopped
and she did bath same day evening we had intercourse night but
unfortunately bleeding started next day now we are worrying is it sin
we did sex with out waiting more days ? if its sin what is the
compensation for this in islam.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that
Muhammadis His slave and Messenger.
Since you had sexual intercourse with your wife after the bleeding had
totally stopped, and after she had performed Ghusl, then you are both
not sinful even if she had bleeding again because when you had
intercourse with her she was pure, and you both were not obligated to
wait for more days. Rather, whenever a woman sees purity and performs
Ghusl, it becomes permissible for her husband to have intercourse with
her.
Besides, this bleeding that your wife saw is ruled to be menstruation
if it is within the time-period that can be considered as
menstruation, like if 13 days or more have expired between seeing it
and the interruption of bleeding prior to it, then it would be
considered as a second menstruation. But if less than 13 days have
expired between this bleeding and the interruption of the bleeding
before it, then if this bleeding is added to the previous bleeding
along with the period of purity between them and their totality do not
exceed 15 days, then it is also menstruation, otherwise, it is
bleeding outside the monthly period.Allaah Knows best.