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Saturday, January 13, 2018

Marriage Contract, - * Her father engaged her to him, then her father died and her paternal uncles want to change the agreement

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I am a 29 years old man. About two years and half ago I proposed to my work colleague. I agreed with her father about everything and we became engaged, by the will of Allah. During this period of time we had few arguments. I had a very good relationship with her father until he died last January, may Allah have mercy on him. Since the death of her father, my fiancée’s uncles have interfered in everything, and they tried to change the agreement I had with her farther. Eventually one of her uncles returned what I have bought of gold for my fiancée to me to end the engagement. Although my fiancée and I still want to continue. Some wise brothers interfered to solve this problem and both families were happy to maintain the relationship. But her uncles are stipulating illogical conditions to complete the marriage, in opposition with my previous deal with my fiancée’s father. What is the ruling of Islam on this situation? Is it permissible for her uncles to alter the stipulations of the agreement with her father? What is the solution for this stubbornness?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
Before answering your question, it is essential to draw your attention to the fact that working in mixed workplaces with men and women together is not permissible, and it is one of the doors that lead to corruption, as its effects on society are obvious.
We have mentioned the evidence for the prohibition on mixing in question no. 1200.
The one who is faced with the problem of working in a mixed environment – if he cannot leave that job – must avoid looking at women and being alone with them and talking to them about things that do not have to do with work.
Among the negative consequences of haraam mixing is what happens between men and non-mahram women whom they call “work colleagues”, such as haraam looking, talking and correspondence, and in many cases it leads to haraam relationships.
Secondly:
With regard to your question, it seems from your question that you did not do the marriage contract with this woman. Based on that, you are still a “stranger” (non-mahram) to her so it is not permissible for you to be alone with her or to talk to her too much, until the marriage contract is done between you. The marriage contract with a woman is not valid unless it is done in the presence of her wali (guardian). As her father has died, guardianship passes to her paternal grandfather. If there is no paternal grandfather, then it passes to one of her brothers. If she has no brother then guardianship passes to her paternal uncles. The wali does not have the right to prevent marriage without an acceptable shar’i reason. If he does prevent her, then guardianship passes from him to the next closest relative, then to the sharee’ah judge or one who is acting in his stead. It should also be noted that the maternal uncles cannot be walis of the woman.
See the order of guardianship in the answer to question no. 2127.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: If the woman likes a man and he is compatible with her, then her guardian, such as her brother then paternal uncles, must marry her to him. If they prevent her from getting married, then the next closest wali should give her in marriage, or the ruler, without (the wali’s) permission, according to scholarly consensus. The wali does not have the right to force her to marry someone she does not like, or to prevent her from marrying someone she does like if he is compatible, according to scholarly consensus. It is only people of ignorance and wrongdoing who force women into marriage or prevent them from marrying, who give their female relatives in marriage to people whom they choose for their own purposes, not the woman’s interests, and force them or embarrass them into doing that, and prevent them from marrying those they want out of enmity towards them or to serve some purpose. All of these are acts of Jaahiliyyah (ignorance), oppression and enmity, and are forbidden by Allaah and His Messenger. The Muslims are unanimously agreed that they are haraam. Allaah has enjoined women’s guardians to look at the woman’s interests, not their own whims and desires, like all other guardians and deputies who act on behalf of others. Their aim should be the interests of the one on whose behalf they are acting, not their own whims and desires. This comes under the heading of the trust (amaanah) that Allaah has commanded should be fulfilled, as He says (interpretation of the meaning): “Verily, Allaah commands that you should render back the trusts to those, to whom they are due; and that when you judge between men, you judge with justice” [al-Nisa’ 4:58]. This is also part of sincerity that is required. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Religion is sincerity (naseehah)” three times. It was asked, “To whom, O Messenger of Allaah?” He said, “To Allaah, to His Book, to His Messenger, to the leaders of the Muslims and to their common folk.”
Majmoo’ al-Fataawa(32/52, 53)
But we advise you not to marry her without the agreement of her family; it is essential to gain their approval and win them over, so that you will not be a cause of breaking of family ties that may never be healed after that.
And Allaah knows best.















Friday, January 12, 2018

Comedy

வேனி : இன்னும் முப்பது வருஷம் இளமையா இருக்க வழி இருக்கா?
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ரானி : எதுக்கு?
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வேனி : ஒரு மெகா சீரியல்ல கதாநாயகி வாய்ப்பு கிடைச்சிருக்கு!!

Comedy

வேனி : இன்னும் முப்பது வருஷம் இளமையா இருக்க வழி இருக்கா?
:
ரானி : எதுக்கு?
:
வேனி : ஒரு மெகா சீரியல்ல கதாநாயகி வாய்ப்பு கிடைச்சிருக்கு!!

Rulings on Marriage, - * She admitted to zina and is going to get married, and is afraid of being exposed to shame

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There is a girl who got to know a young man and he promised to marry her, then he took her honour and made a video of her. Now she is suffering because of sin and shame, and she is going to get married soon to another man, who does not know what happened to her with regard to her honour. She is afraid of being exposed to scandal before him and her family. What should she do?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
The calamity asked about here is one of the outcomes of haraam relationships: making acquaintances, promises, lies, love and infatuation, followed by immoral actions, ruined lives, disgrace, scandal and shame. Sincere advisers are still shouting at the heedless to wake up and telling the deluded to pay attention, whilst the proponents of free mixing and evil are still defending their stance, claiming that there is nothing wrong with these relationships, and that it is not necessary to impose restrictions on boys and girls. The one who will suffer as a result of this sin and because of the scandal, worries and anxiety is this deceived girl, who followed the footsteps of the Shaytaan and was fooled by wishes and false promises, so she went against the command of her Lord to stay in her house, lower her gaze, avoid speaking softly and adhere to hijab. Verily to Allah we belong and to Him we will return. Hoe regrettable it is for the Muslims that this corruption exists in their societies and has crept into their houses, with the neglect of fathers and mothers, brothers and sisters.
How abhorrent is zina and how awful its consequences in this world and in the Hereafter. Hence the punishment for the one who does it is either flogging or stoning, along with the painful punishment in the fire of Hell.
Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
“The woman and the man guilty of illegal sexual intercourse, flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not pity withhold you in their case, in a punishment prescribed by Allah, if you believe in Allah and the Last Day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment.”
[an-Noor 24:2]
“And come not near to the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a Fahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits (a great sin)), and an evil way (that leads one to Hell unless Allah forgives him)”
[al-Isra’ 17:32].
In the hadeeth of the dream that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) saw, he said: “…So we went on, and came to something like a tannoor (a kind of oven, lined with clay, usually used for baking bread). – I think he said: In it there was much noise and voices. – We looked into it and saw naked men and women. A flame of fire was reaching them from underneath, and when it reached them, they cried out loudly. I asked them, ‘Who are these?’ They said to me, ‘Move on, move on!’ … I said to them, ‘I have seen many wonders this night. What do all these things mean that I have seen?’ They said: ‘We will tell you. … The naked men and women whom you saw in a structure that resembled an oven are the adulterers and adulteresses.’”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari inBaab Ithm az-Zunaat, no. 7047
Hence what this girl has to do is repent sincerely to Allah, may He be exalted, regret it a great deal, pray for forgiveness, and resolve never to do such a thing again, in the hope that Allah may forgive her and pardon her. She should also offer a great deal of supplication (du‘aa’) and beseech Allah, may He be exalted, to conceal her and not expose her in this world or in the Hereafter, and to suffice her against the evil of that evildoer. She should choose the times when supplications are answered, such as the last third of the night, the time between the adhaan and iqaamah, and the last hour of Friday. She should also do a lot of acts of worship, especially praying and giving charity. And she should think positively of her Lord, may He be glorified, because He said in the hadeeth qudsi: “I am as My slave thinks I am, and I am with him when he remembers Me. If he remembers me to himself, I remember him to Myself; if he remembers Me in a gathering, I remember him in a gathering better than it; if he draws near to Me a handspan, I draw near to him an arm’s length; if he draws near to me an arm’s length, I draw near to him a fathom’s length; if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 7405; Muslim, 2675
Ahmad (17020) narrated from Waathilah that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, said: ‘I am as My slave thinks I am, so let him think of Me however he wishes.’” Classed as saheeh by Shu ‘ayb al-Arna’oot inTahqeeq al-Musnad. So let her think positively of her Lord, may He be glorified, and think that He will conceal her and suffice her, and accept her repentance and put her affairs straight.
She should understand that she has to conceal herself and not tell anyone about her sin, neither her husband nor anyone else; rather she should conceal that even if he asks her, and she should employ double entendres. The hymen may be broken as a result of heavy menstruation, jumping or other causes.
If it so happens that someone knows what happened to her, he should strive to conceal her first of all, then help her in her trial and try to get hold of the video recorded by that evildoer by reminding him of the punishment of Allah, may He be exalted, and the severity of the crime that he has committed. If he is able to use threats with him and call upon the authority of someone trustworthy who has any authority over him, in order to scare him, that is good.
We ask Allah to accept our repentance and that of the believers, and to conceal our faults and protect us from worries and anxiety.
And Allah knows best.