How 2 manage yourself, - 5 ways to avoid answering annoying questions

Examples of Annoying questions
How much money do you make?
When are you gonna get married?
How much you bought this for?
Do you like him?
I am pretty sure you were asked some of those questions or similar
ones and didn't feel like giving an answer. Some people can't really
realize how sensitive some questions can be and so they ask them as if
they are normal questions. Because such a situation is unavoidable i
will tell you about few interesting ways that you can use to avoid
answering those questions without offending the person who asked them.
After all replying with answers such as "It's none of your business"
or "I don't want to answer that question" might seem rude to some
people. And since many close people might ask you those sensitive
questions you don't want to annoy them all.
5 Ways to Avoid Answering Annoying Questions
*.1) Reply back with a question:The first trick is to reply back with
a question such as "Why do you want to know" or "will it make a
difference if you knew?". The good thing about replying back with a
question is that the conversationcan easily take another direction
away from the original question.
*.2) Reply back with a joke:Question: "How much money do you make each
month" Answer: "Few million dollars". Many people will realize that
you don't want to answer a question when you reply back with a funny
answerand if you were lucky they won't repeat the question again
*.3) Reply with an unclear answer:You will be amazed when you find out
how many people just want any answer and not just a specific one. Here
is an example Question: "How much money do you make" Answer: "Not
enough to pay my bills"
*.4) Reply with a personal question:The best way to distract a person
and make him forget about a question is to reply back with a personal
question. Question: "How much do they pay you?" Answer: "Are you
looking for another job or what?"
*.5) Combine two methods together:You can always combine two methods
together for more effective results. Here is an example where the
answer included a vague reply plus a question. question: "How much you
bought this for?" Answer: "Its not as expensive as it seems, Do you
want to buy one?"
What else can you do
It would also be very smart of you to try to guess why a person is
asking a certain question because once you know the intention you can
give an answer that appeals to him without actually giving exact
facts.
If for example you realized that a friend of yours is asking about
your salary because he wants to know whether his company pays well or
not then an answer such as "Its close to the salary everyone gets"
might be satisfactory for him.
After all he didn't ask that question because he wanted to know how
much you earn but he asked it because he wanted to know whether he is
being paid well or not. Knowing the intention behind the question
isn't always easy but if done right you can always escape the question
without answering it directly.{ see more Articles -
http://aydnajimudeen.blogspot.in/}

Invalid Marriages, - * He took his wife back during her ‘iddah on the basis of a fatwa but she obtained a different fatwa and married someone else

**

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I was married to a woman and had a son from her, then there were some differences between me and her and I divorced her. During the ‘iddah, there was an argument between me and her brother, and I swore an oath and said: “If So and so does not come back to my house before Fajr, then she is thrice-divorced.” But her brother did not let her, so she did not come back. At that time I had not taken her back (formally, as a wife). After a short while I sought a fatwa and was told that it was permissible for me to take her back but I did not ask whether the second talaaq had taken place or not. Two years later there were major problems in which her family played a major role, and I divorced her, but during the ‘iddah I met her and there happened between us that which happens between husband and wife. I asked one of the scholars working in the court in my city and he gave me a fatwa in writing stating that the divorce that I did not ask about did not count as such, because a divorce issued to an already-divorced woman does not count, and my taking her back by means of intercourse was valid, and I also asked two friends to testify that I had taken her back and told my wife about that, but I did not tell her family because of the severity of the discord in the family. My family got angry with me when they found out that I had taken her back. But I asked her to bear that with patience and to let the taking back continue in secret until I was able to become independent of my family. After one year, during which I used to meet with her in secret and we would sometimes do what husbands and wives do, Allaah blessed me with the opportunity to travel abroad to complete my studies. I got in touch with her ten days before I was due to travel and told her that Allaah had given us a solution to our problem. I asked her to wait for one or two months, and I would tell her how Allaah had granted me a way out, then I left and did not tell her. One week after I left, my family suddenly told me that my ex-wife (or so they thought) had got married! I became very distressed and I did not know what to do, as I was abroad and I did not believe it. I tried to contact my wife and she told me that she thought that I was deceiving her all that time and that I had betrayed her, because she knew that the period of travel would not be less than five years, and she claimed that she had consulted a scholar on the radio as to whether intercourse with the wife without the intention of taking her back was regarded as taking her back or not, and he told her that the intention was essential.
I asked for advice and was told that I had the right to refer the matter to court to seek a separation, or to divorce her, so long as I told her so that she could observe the iddah following divorce. Please note that they married her to someone else without taking the divorce papers from me, and that is what Ii intended to tell them when they asked me about the divorce papers.
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Praise be to Allaah.
The most beloved deed of the troops of Iblees to him is causing separation between man and wife. The devils keep competing in that so as to attain the honour of being close to Iblees and gaining high status before him.
It was narrated that Jaabir (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Iblees places his throne over the water, then he sends out his troops, and the one who is closest in status to him is the one who causes the greatest amount of fitnah (tribulation or temptation). One of them comes and says, I have done such and such, and he says: You have not done anything. Then one of them comes and says: I did not leave him until I separated him and his wife. Then he draws him close to him and says: How good you are.” Narrated by Muslim (2813).
What we see, hear and read of the actions of husbands and wives points to the success of the devils in achieving their aims. The divorce rate in Muslim countries is frightening. And if you look for the reasons you will see that it rarely has to do with religion. Most of it has to do with insignificant worldly matters, so the husband acts in haste, gets angry and divorces his wife, then the family is divided and scattered, and the children are lost.
Perhaps the one who reads this will think carefully before divorcing, and he will strive to do that which will make his family happy and avoid divorce, so that he will not bring misery upon himself and his family.
Secondly:
In general terms, there are differences of opinion among the scholars concerning many cases of divorce. Whatever the husband knows of the rulings before he utters the words of divorce, he should adhere to what he knows, and whatever he does not know about, if he asks someone whose religious commitment and knowledge he trusts, then he has to follow the fatwa he issues, and it is not permissible for him to move from one scholar to another in order to find another fatwa. He should not have any doubts, for he has done that which Allaah has enjoined of asking the people of knowledge, and it is obligatory for him to follow the ruling, especially if there is a ruling issued by an Islamic judge, because the ruling of the judges is decisive in cases of differences of opinion, and the questioner must accept the answer of a trustworthy scholar.
Thirdly:
What the scholars said about a divorce issued to an already-divorced woman not counting as such is a view that was favoured by a number of scholars, including Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, and by Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen among contemporary scholars.
Fourthly:
What the scholars said to you that your having intercourse with your wife is regarded as taking her back is the view of the Hanafis and Hanbalis, and there is nothing wrong with you following this opinion, because you did what you were enjoined to do, namely asking the people of knowledge, and asking about a matter that is subject to ijtihaad in which the scholars have differed.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
The apparent meaning of the words of al-Khuraqi is that taking back is only achieved verbally. This is the view of al-Shaafa’i and is one of the two views narrated from Ahmad.
The second view is that taking back is achieved by means of intercourse, whether or not he intended to take her back. This view was favoured by Ibn Haamid and al-Qaadi. This is the view of Sa’eed ibn al-Musayyab, al-Hasan, Ibn Sireen, ‘Ata’, Tawoos, al-Zuhri, al-Thawri, al-Awzaa’i, Ibn Abi Layla and ashaab al-ra’i. End quote.
Al-Mughni(8/482).
We think that your telling your wife of the fatwa and taking her back, and bringing two witnesses to the taking back, may have been another way to confirm that you were taking her back, in addition to having intercourse. Your telling her and the two witnesses is a clear statement that you took her back.
Whatever the case, you asked for advice and were told that she had been taken back, and you told her and bought witnesses to confirm the taking back.
Based on this, the fact that your wife says that she consulted one of the scholars who gave her a fatwa saying that your taking her back did not count as such because you had intercourse without the intention of taking her back is of no significance, because you consulted someone and told her of the fatwa and brought witnesses to that, thus the taking back was done in the proper manner, and there is no way for your wife to disagree with that.
Fifthly:
Telling your family and your wife’s family is not a condition of taking her back, and in fact it is not a condition that the wife tell them herself. A husband may take back his revocably-divorced wife (first or second talaaq) even if she is far away from him, and it is not a condition that she be told or even agree to it.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“And their husbands have the better right to take them back in that period, if they wish for reconciliation” [al-Baqarah 2:228].
Al-Qurtubi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
The scholars are unanimously agreed that if a free man divorces his free wife, and he had consummated the marriage with her, and it is a first or second talaaq, then he has more right to take her back so long as the ‘iddah has not ended, even if the wife disagrees.
Tafseer al-Qurtubi(3/120).
But it would have been better to tell her family that you had taken back your wife back. The fact that you did not tell her may have caused them to do this terrible evil, which is marrying her to someone else, thinking that your divorce and your absence meant that their daughter was divorced fully and was able to remarry.
Allaah has enjoined bringing witnesses to taking back a wife in the verse (interpretation of the meaning):“And take as witness two just persons from among you (Muslims)” [al-Talaaq 65:2], so as to put an end to disputes, inform people and alert the heedless to the number of divorces.
The fuqaha’ indicated that if there are no witnesses to the taking-back, that may result in disputes and arguments as to whether the wife has been taken back or not, and the woman may end up marrying another man, thinking that she has not been taken back (by the first husband).
In al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (22/114) it says:
The majority of fuqaha’ are of the view that it is mustahabb to tell the wife that she has been taken back, because that will put an end to the disputes that may arise between man and wife.
Al-‘Ayni said: It is mustahabb to tell her (i.e., to tell the wife that she has been taken back), because otherwise she might get married on the basis of her belief that her husband has not taken her back and her ‘iddah has ended, and she may have intercourse with the new husband, thus she will be sinning for not asking her husband, and he will be sinning for not telling her. But even if he does not tell her, the taking-back is still valid, because it is the continuation of an existing marriage and is not the initiation of a new one and the husband is exercising his rights, and for a man to exercise his right he does not need to inform others. End quote.
Now what you must do is refer the matter to the sharee’ah court, and present the written fatwa from this scholar, and bring the two witnesses, to prove that you had in fact taken your wife back.
If you can inform everyone of the matter without going to the sharee’ah court, that is fine.
We should point out that if you do not want to take her back, it is not permissible for you to keep quiet about the matter. After setting things straight, you can divorce her if you wish, but you should understand that if you keep quiet, her second marriage will remain invalid, and this is a serious evil.
We ask Allaah to help you to do that which pleases Him and to make good easy for you.
And Allaah knows best.

Invalid Marriages, - * He wants to marry a girl with whom he had a relationship

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I hope you can help me as I am in a deep trouble. I knew some girl who works far from where her family lives. For two years we had a loving relationship, we were meeting and committing Zina (adultery), we agreed to marry because I can not forget her, and she can not forget me either. Since she knew me she became religious and changed a lot. Allah knows how much I love her. Do you advise me to marry her? I am suffering.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
Before answering your question, we must remind you that it is obligatory to repent and regret what you have done with this woman, because you have fallen into several major sins, the most serious of which is zina (fornication) which is clearly forbidden in the Qur'aan and Sunnah, and the scholars are unanimously agreed that it is haraam, and wise people are unanimously agreed that it is abhorrent and evil.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And come not near to unlawful sex. Verily, it is a Faahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits: a great sin), and an evil way that leads one to hell unless Allaah forgives him)”
[al-Isra’ 17:32]
And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No adulterer is a believer at the time when he is committing adultery.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (2475) and Muslim (57).
There is a severe punishment for zina in al-Barzakh, before the punishment in the Hereafter. In the famous hadeeth of Samurah ibn Jundub (may Allaah be pleased with him) about the dream, it says:
“… then we [i.e., the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and Jibreel and Mikaa’eel] proceeded and came to something like a tannoor (a kind of oven), in which there were clamouring voices.” He [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] said: “We looked into it and there we saw naked men and women. Flames were coming to them from the bottom of it, and when the flames reached them, they made uproar. I said to them [i.e., the two angels who were accompanying him], ‘Who are these?’ … They said, ‘We will tell you. As for the naked men and women in the structure that resembled a tannoor oven, they are the adulterers and adulteresses.’”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (6640).
Allaah has ordained the hadd punishment for zina. He says concerning the hadd punishment for an unmarried person (interpretation of the meaning):
“The fornicatress and the fornicator, flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not pity withhold you in their case, in a punishment prescribed by Allaah, if you believe in Allaah and the Last Day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment”
[al-Noor 24:2]
As for the person who has previously been married, the hadd punishment is execution, In the hadeeth narrated by Imam Muslim in hisSaheeh(3199) it is narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “For a previously-married person with a previously-married person, [the punishment is] one hundred lashes and stoning.”
What we have said to you applies to the woman too, and she should realize that her sin is even worse, but because, as you say, she has become righteous, we hope that her repentance is sincere and that Allaah will forgive her by His grace and kindness.
Secondly:
You should note that if you have not both repented from the sin of zina, then it is not permissible for you to marry her, because Allaah has forbidden the zaani and zaaniyah to marry unless they both repent. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“The adulterer — fornicator marries not but an adulteress — fornicatress or a Mushrikah; and the adulteress –fornicatress, none marries her except an adulterer — fornicater or a Mushrik [and that means that the man who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrikah (female polytheist, pagan or idolatress) or a prostitute, then surely, he is either an adulterer — fornicator, or a Mushrik (polytheist, pagan or idolater). And the woman who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrik (polytheist, pagan or idolater) or an adulterer — fornicator, then she is either a prostitute or a Mushrikah (female polytheist, pagan, or idolatress)]. Such a thing is forbidden to the believers (of Islamic Monotheism)”
[al-Noor 24:3]
Shaykh ‘Abd al-Rahmaan al-Sa’di (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
This clearly points to the abhorrent nature of zina, and that is tarnishes the honour of the one who does it in a way that other sins do not. Allaah tells us that no woman would marry a zaani but a woman who is also a zaaniyah, who is like him, or a mushrik woman who associates others with Allaah and does not believe in the Resurrection or in reward and punishment (in the Hereafter), and who does not adhere to the commands of Allaah. And similarly, no one would marry a zaaniyah except a zaani or a mushrik. “Such a thing is forbidden to the believers” means, it is haraam for them to marry zaanis or zaaniyahs.
What the verse means is that if a person wants to marry the man or woman who commits zina and has not repented from that, despite the fact that Allaah has prohibited that, then he is either not adhering to the ruling of Allaah and His Messenger, in which case he cannot be anything but a mushrik, or he is adhering to the ruling of Allaah and His Messenger but he agrees to this marriage despite knowing that this person has committed zina, in which case this marriage is also zina, and he is an immoral zaani. If he truly believed in Allaah, he would not do that. This clearly indicates that it is haraam to marry a zaaniyah unless she repents, or to marry a zaani unless he repents, because marriage is the strongest type of companionship, and Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“Assemble those who did wrong, together with their companions” [al-Saaffaat 37:22]. Allaah has forbidden that because of what it involves of great evil, and lack of protective jealousy, and attribution of children who are not his to the husband, and the zaani failing to keep her chaste because he is distracted elsewhere, any one of which is sufficient reason for the prohibition. End quote.
Tafseer al-Sa’di(p. 561).
The scholars of the Standing Committee were asked:
A man committed zina with a virgin and wants to marry her. Is it permissible for him to do that?
They replied:
If the matter is as described, each of them must repent to Allaah and give up this sin, and regret what has happened of immoral actions, and resolve not to do it again, and do a lot of good deeds, in the hope that Allaah will accept their repentance and turn their bad deeds into good. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse ___ and whoever does this shall receive the punishment.
69. The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace;
70. Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft‑Forgiving, Most Merciful
71. And whosoever repents and does righteous good deeds; then verily, he repents towards Allaah with true repentance”
[al-Furqaan 25:68-70]
If he wants to marry her, then he must wait for one menstrual cycle to establish whether her womb is empty before doing the marriage contract with her. If it turns out that she is pregnant, then it is not permissible for him to do the marriage contract with her until after she gives birth, in accordance with the hadeeth in which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade a man to water the crop of another with his own water. End quote.
Fataawa Islamiyyah(3/247).
So repent to Allaah and set your affairs straight, and do a lot of good deeds, and after that it will be permissible for you to get married. We ask Allaah to accept your repentance and to forgive you, by His grace and mercy.
And Allaah knows best.

How 2 manage yourself, - This is how to Recover from any breakup in 3 days

Can I be honest with you?
Nothing feels better than spending your time with the person you love the most!
And you know what else?
It even gets better when you discover that they love you back too.
You can feel the love in their eyes when they look at you and say,''I
love you too''.
It's one of the happiest momentsEVERin everyone's life.
Now that's the cool thing about being in love with someone.
But here's the sad truth...
What If suddenly that person starts ignoring you and avoids talking to you?
Or worse... What If they decided to break-up with you?
How will that make you feel?
It turns out, the person who makes you feel happy the most – can also
make you feel very (very) sad!
I know how it feels.(it hurts)
It's the worst and most painful feeling that you can ever experience.
But it doesn't have to be that way.
The good news is that this doesn't have to be you.
Recovering from painful break-ups is easier than you think once you
understand how your mind works.
In my book - How to Get Over Anyone In Few Days, I explain in detail
how I personally get over the worst breakup EVER in just 3-5 days
using powerful psychological and scientifically-proven techniques.
This is by far the best book in the world out there covering the topic
ofbreak-up recovery.
But don't just take my word for it...
''Less than 12 hours passed since my breakup, I am recovering
already!''–Fahmy Mo.
''In all of the books I've read regarding this issue, I've never seen
anything so powerful.''–Mira Essam.
If you want to completely recover from the most devastating breakups
and to NEVER think about that person again, then this book could be
the most important book you'll ever read about this topic.
Forget everything you've heard about breakups, and...Wish you the best
in your life,