Never Forget, - Dought & clear, - * Ruling on shaking hands with and kissing mahrams

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What is the ruling on greeting mahrams by kissing and shaking hands? If that is permissible, then who are the relatives who are mahrams? Does the ruling on shaking hands and kissing include mahrams through breastfeeding?
Praise be to Allah.
There is nothing wrong with a man greeting his mahrams, or with a woman greeting her mahrams, by shaking hands or by kissing. There is nothing wrong with that. The mahrams are the ones who are mentioned in the verse in which Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):
“…and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, their fathers, their husbands fathers, their sons, their husbands sons, their brothers or their brothers sons, or their sisters sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islam), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess...”
[an-Noor 24:31].
So mahrams include maternal uncles, paternal uncles and others.
The following are the mahrams: her father, her grandfathers, her mother’s father and grandfathers on the mother’s side, her sons, the sons of her daughters and the sons of her sons. The woman’s brothers and the sons of her brothers are also her mahrams, as are her maternal uncles and paternal uncles; all of them are her mahrams. The same applies to her husband’s father, her husband’s grandfather, her husband’s son, his son’s sons and the son of her husband’s daughters; all of them are mahrams to her.
There is nothing wrong with a man kissing his mahram - his paternal aunt, his maternal aunt, his mother, his grandmother and his sister. There is nothing wrong with him kissing them, but it is preferable for him to kiss her on the head, especially if she is an adult, or on the nose or on the cheek. The majority of scholars regard it as makrooh to kiss on the mouth except the husband; it is better for that to be with the husband, not with mahrams. In the case of mahrams, kissing should be done on the head, the nose or the cheek. This is what is preferred and is appropriate.
It is all the same whether the mahrams are mahram by blood or through breastfeeding.
The mahrams through breastfeeding are the woman’s father through breastfeeding, her paternal uncle through breastfeeding, her maternal uncle through breastfeeding, her husband’s son through breastfeeding, her husband’s father through breastfeeding. They are like blood relatives because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “What becomes mahram (forbidden for marriage) through breastfeeding is that which becomes mahram through blood ties.” This is what he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said. So blood ties are like ties through breastfeeding. The same also applies to ties through marriage (in-laws), as mentioned above. The husband’s father is a mahram by virtue of ties through marriage. The husband’s grandfather and the husband’s son are also mahrams by virtue of ties through marriage. Whether (the mahram relationship) is through ties of blood or through breastfeeding, shaking hands is more appropriate.
End quote.
Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him).

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Never Forget, - Dought & clear, - * Should she refuse to go to Hajj because shewill go back to sin after Hajj?

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I am a young woman, twenty-four years old. I want to go for Hajj, but my relatives told me: You will inevitably fall into sin, such as going to wedding parties, where of course there is music and mixing between men and women.
Therefore, after coming back from Hajj, can I go to places where there is mixing between men and women? Is it permissible for me to go with my paternal uncle for Hajj?
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
We would like to congratulate you for your intention and decision to do Hajj, for at this young age, and in that country that is far away, it is very rare to find anyone who thinks of performing this great obligatory duty. Perhaps that is because they are distracted by worldly concerns and eagerness to acquire wealth, and to follow in the footsteps of the people of that disbelieving land. It is for these reasons that Islam advises us not to live among them, and repeatedly warns us against doing that. We ask Allah, may He be exalted, to enable you and your family to live in a Muslim country.
Secondly:
You should understand that sins incur the wrath of Allah, may He be exalted, and the one who does them is deserving of punishment. It makes no difference whether those sins occur before or after Hajj. Imam Ibn al-Qayyim wrote in his bookal-Jawaab al-Kaafi li man su’ila ‘an ad-Dawa’ ash-Shaafiabout a number of the effects that sin has on the one who does it. We have quoted that at length in the answer to question no. 23425. Among the things he (may Allah have mercy on him) said was that sin creates alienation between a person and his Lord, and it is the cause of loss ofbarakah(blessing), a bad end, things becoming difficult, and scarcity of provision.
By Allah’s grace towards this ummah, He has ordained for it occasions of good, of which the Muslim may avail himself to expiate his sins and increase his reward. So fasting the day of ‘Arafah bring expiation for two years, fasting the day of ‘Ashoora’ brings expiation for one year, and so on.
One of the greatest occasions of good and opportunities for doing acts of worship and obedience is Hajj. It is narrated in the saheeh Sunnah that “Whoever does Hajj and does not utter any obscene speech or do any evil deed, will go back as his mother bore him.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (1683) and Muslim (1349).
The wise Muslim takes advantage of such opportunities, not in order to go back to committing sin again after that, but in order to turn over a new leaf and reconcile with his Lord, may He be blessed and exalted. If the Muslim understands that he no longer has any sins on his record, he will give thanks to his Lord, may He be exalted, and part of giving thanks is that he does not go back to doing that which incurs His wrath. This does not mean that the one who does Hajj will never sin again; rather what it means is that it is a characteristic of acts of worship in general that they form a barrier to sin, by the grace of Allah. Another of their characteristics, especially Hajj, is that they take away from a person the consequences and shame of sin.
For that reason, the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Make the Hajj and ‘Umrah follow each other closely, for they remove poverty and sins as the bellows removes the dross of iron, gold and silver, and an accepted Hajj brings no less a reward than Paradise.”
Narrated and classed as saheeh by al-Tirmidhi (810); al-Nasaa’i (2631). Classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani inal-Silsilah al-Saheehah(2901).
This indicates that the Muslim may commit sins before and after Hajj, for no one is infallible and immune from falling into sin. But if he does Hajj and ‘umrah a great deal, his sins will be expiated by these repeated actions.
We do not mean to say that a person has a concession allowing him to sin after Hajj or before it – Allah forbid – not at all. There is no concession whatsoever allowing anyone to disobey Allah. Rather what we mean to say is that if every person who committed a sin refused to go on pilgrimage to the House of Allah, no one would ever go on pilgrimage to the House of Allah, and no one would ever perform the rituals ordained by Allah.
The same would be true if everyone who was afraid of sin refused to go on Hajj. Pilgrimage to the sacred House of Allah would cease, for there is no believing slave who can guarantee that he will never fall into sin at some point. The most that we can say is:
Allah has instructed His slaves to repent, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):“And all of you beg Allah to forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful” [an-Noor 24:31].
Part of repenting properly is training oneself not to go back to any of that sin, minor or major. If one is overcome by one’s nafs and goes back to any of that sin, then he must hasten to repent once more, and to do a lot of good deeds.
Falling into sin requires us to hasten to do acts of worship and obedience, and to do a great deal of such acts at all times and on all occasions, not to neglect a significant act of worship, such as pilgrimage to the sacred House of Allah, for fear of falling into sin once more. This is contrary to the nature of things.
Thirdly:
With regard to going with your paternal uncle, yes it is permissible for you to go with your paternal uncle, because he is one of your mahrams. If this is the obligatory Hajj, then going with him is obligatory for you, not merely permissible.
So seek the help of Allah and hasten to do Hajj, and strive hard to repent to Allah and express your need for Him to protect you from sin and error.
And Allah knows best.

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Never Forget, - Dought & clear, - * Ruling on wearing ordinary clothing over the izaar and rida’ [ihram garments] before starting the rituals

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I am going to travel for ‘umrah next week – in sha Allah – and I intend to enter ihram from my house in Cairo, because it is difficult to do ghusl and change my clothes when passing the miqaat in the plane. But the weather is cold, and wearing the ihram garments that are relatively light may cause me to become sick en route to the airport, especially since my immune system is weakened due to the chemotherapy that I am undergoing.
Can I start the steps of ihram at home by doing ghusl, putting on perfume, wearing the ihram garments and praying, but deferring saying “Labbayka ‘umratan (Here I am for ‘Umrah)” and reciting the Talbiyah, then put on warm tailored garments over the ihram, then take off the tailored garments and say “Labbayka ‘umratan” and the Talbiyah later on, in the airport or on board the plane? This is so that I will not put on any tailored garments after completing the first steps of entering ihram.
Praise be to Allah.
It is permissible for the one who wants to do Hajj or ‘umrah to do ghusl, put on perfume and whatever garments he wishes over the ihram garments, and to do any of the things that are prohibited when in ihram, so long as he has not formed the intention to actually begin the rituals. This is indicated by the report narrated by an-Nasaa’i from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: I put perfume on the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) with my own hand, when he entered ihram – when he wanted to enter ihram (and before he did so) – and when he exited ihram – before he completely exited ihram (in the case of Hajj). Classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani (may Allah have mercy on him) inSaheeh Sunan an-Nasaa’i.
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
This report is quoted as evidence that it is mustahabb (encouraged) to put on perfume when wanting to enter ihram, and that it is permissible to leave is there after entering ihram, and that it does not matter if its colour or fragrance remain; rather what is prohibited is to put it on anew when in ihram. This is the view of the majority of scholars.
End quote fromFath al-Baari(3/390)
Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him) said: There is nothing wrong with doing ghusl, putting on the ihram garments and putting on perfume at home, because they are close to the miqaat by means of vehicles. But what is prescribed for them is not to enter ihram except at the miqaat. Ihram means forming the intention to begin the rituals. This is what ihram means. Then it is prescribed for them when forming the intention to utter the ritual intended, so one should say: “Labbayka ‘umratan(Here I am for ‘umrah)” or “Labbayka Hajjan(Here I am for Hajj).”
End quote fromMajmoo‘ Fataawa Ibn Baaz(17/52)
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said inash-Sharh al-Mumti‘(7/69): The words “his intention is a condition” refer to the intention to begin the rituals, i.e., forming the intention to begin the rituals is a condition; it is essential to form the intention to begin the rituals. If a person recites the Talbiyah without intending to start the rituals, then he does not enter ihram merely by reciting the Talbiyah. If he puts on the ihram garments without intending to begin the rituals, then he has not entered ihram just by wearing the ihram garments. The Talbiyah may be recited by the pilgrim and others, and wearing the izaar and rida’ is for the pilgrim in ihram and others. End quote
Based on that, it is permissible for you to wear tailored clothes, and to wear whatever you want, to protect yourself from cold, over the ihram garments (the izar and rida’), and to do everything that the person who is not in ihram does, of the things that are prohibited whilst in ihram, even if you have done ghusl and put on the ihram garments in your home, so long as you have not formed the intention to begin the rituals. This intention – as stated above – is an essential condition, but it does not have to be done until you come in line with the miqaat. It is permissible to enter ihram before reaching the miqaat, but this is contrary to what is preferred.
And Allah knows best.

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Acts of Worship, - Dought &clear, - * Ruling on customs and traditions that go againstsharee’ah or cause embarrassment

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There is a tradition some people observe during funerals. When someone who relates to two villages dies, they do the funeral then visit the relatives of the dead person. Then they quickly return to their village without any delay, they do not accept to stay at the relatives for hospitality because they think they it is not permissible for them to delay returning in this occasion.
Note that all of them in the two villages Muslims, most or all of them follow the Hanafi School of thought. They all hold same nationality and they may have womb relations.
My question is: has this habit any basis in Islam? I hope you give me a detailed full answer. Because this habit sometimes causes embarrassment and other social problems.
Praise be to Allaah.
There is nothing in sharee’ah that points to the customs you mention in your question. It seems that these are things that people have become accustomed to in their lives and they do not attribute them to religion. It also seems that they have to do with psychological and social matters.
Whatever the case, since these customs have no basis in sharee’ah and especially since you mention in your question that the hospitality asked about is not offered by the family of the deceased, which is what is not allowed, then the people should not regard this as a sacred law that cannot be changed or altered. That is because this custom represents a shortcoming – of whatever extent – in the upholding of family ties and visiting family and brothers. There is no real reason for falling short in upholding these ties, especially since the problem may be caused when the family’s relatives come to the village without coming to visit them. That may be a reason for the resentment and suspicion.
Customs and traditions that clearly go against sharee’ah, or which go against the general aims of sharee’ah, or which may lead to misunderstandings and shortcomings, should be shunned and efforts should be made to change them, which needs some wisdom and gentleness.
Shaykh al-Sa’di (may Allaah have mercy on him) said inRisaalah fi Usool al-Fiqh(7):
The basic principle with regard to customs is that they are permissible, unless it is narrated in sharee’ah that they are forbidden.
Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said inMajmoo’ al-Fataawa(6/510):
What every Muslim must do is not accept customs blindly, rather he should measure them against sharee’ah. Whatever is approved of is permissible for him to do, otherwise he should not do it. The fact that people are accustomed to something is not evidence that it is permissible. All the customs that people are used to in their lands or tribes must be measured against the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). Whatever Allaah and His Messenger have permitted is permissible, and whatever Allaah has forbidden must be abandoned, even if it is the people’s custom. End quote.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said inTafseer Soorat al-Baqarah2 (299):
Tradition does not make something that is not prescribed permissible, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“It is not Al‑Birr (piety, righteousness) that you enter the houses from the back” [al-Baqarah 2:189], even though that was their custom and they regarded it as righteousness. The one who takes something as a custom and regards it as righteousness has to measure it against the laws of Allaah. End quote.
The scholars regarded adherence to customs and traditions that cause hardship for people and lead to some evil consequences or hardship and disputes and difficulty as blameworthy extremism, and as the kind of affectation and going to extremes that is forbidden in Islam.
It was narrated from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“Those who go to extremes are doomed.” He said it three times. Narrated by Muslim (2670).
Al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said inSharh Muslim(16/220):
i.e., those who go to extremes and exaggerate in their words and deeds. End quote.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, speaking of different types of extremism inMajmoo’ al-Fataawa(7/7):
The fourth category is going to extremes in customs, which is adhering too strongly to ancient customs and not turning to that which is better than that. But if the customs are equal to others in serving a valid purpose, then adhering to one’s own customs is better than turning to foreign customs. End quote.
And Allaah knows best.

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