Fathwa, - {Conflictsamong family members}, - Her parents have poor relations with her spouse

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Question
I am a American Muslim convert and have been married to a Muslim husband for 2 years. I became Muslim before marriage and although my parents were not unhappy about my conversion, they were confused with the changes it brought me. Despite this, I remained close to my family, and even talk to my Mother everyday day until a few months ago.
Since my parents met my husband, they have never had a very good relationship with him. I have always felt that they do not trust him. They think my husband changed me a lot and they don't understand why he doesn't open up to them and talk to them and feel as close to them as I am.
Recently my father got very angry with my husband because he felt that my husband was rude to my mother )he actually just didn't agree with her on something(. The problem is that he started physically and verbally attacking my husband. I was very scared because he did this in front of me and could have severely hurt my husband. I knew my father has a bad temper but this was extreme. He pushed and shoved and tried to nearly choke him. My husband told me I should not contact my family anymore. We are afraid that with contact the relationship will just get worse.
I haven't talked to my family for several months and although I am upset with their actions, I miss them. I'm not sure what to do. I miss my family, naturally because they are my family, and because I know that even if our parents mistreat us we must respect them. I am not sure what to do, Islamicly I need to listen to my husband, but I am afraid that by severing ties with my parents, who are getting older in age, that I will punished by Allah. What should I do?
Answer
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the World; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
There is no doubt there are filial obligations upon children even if their parents are not Muslims. This, in fact, demonstrates the parents' right over their children. So, we advise the inquiring sister to reach an agreement with her husband concerning her obligation to visit her family, since failing to them may violate their rights for which she is accountable in Islam.
If your visit to your family will not produce harm in your religion and there is no legal justification to prevent you, then you have to do your best to convince your husband to allow you to visit your parents and treat them kindly, since this is your duty. If your husband refuses and persists that you have to obey him in such illegal action, then you are not obliged to obey him, since there should be no obedience to someone if such obedience constitutes disobedience to The Creator.
After all, we urge you to be kind and gentle with your parents, to return their offence in kind' to treat them mildly, and then, to overlook their wrong. This, Insha Allah, might constitute a good motive to make them embrace Islam.
Allah knows best.

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Discover Islam, - The message of the messengers

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Allaah, the All Wise, All Knowing, All Merciful and Just, created this Universe in order to test and examine His obedient slaves and reward them, and to punish the disobedient. He Says )what means(:"We did not create the heavens and the earth and that between them in play. We did not create them except in truth, but most of them do not know."]Quran 44: 38-39[
Allaah also made clear the main goal for the creation of mankind, Saying )what means(:"I did not create the Jinn and Mankind except for My worship"]Quran 51: 56[
Allaah, the Exalted, did not leave His slaves to rely upon their intellect and inclination to guide them to the correct way; rather He sent them Messengers as bringers of good tidings and warners. He sent the revealed Books with them to be a reference in those matters wherein they disagreed, so that no excuse would remain for the people and the proof would be established against them. Thus, after sending the Messengers, there would be no further excuse for people before Allaah.
Indeed, their mission covered every good and banished every evil. They brought to humankind everything needed for their well being and happiness in this world and the Hereafter. There is nothing good, which they did not inform the people about and nothing evil that they did not warn the people against.
‘Abdullaah bin `Amr bin Al-`Aas, may Allaah be pleased with him, said that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:"There was never a Prophet before me except that it was a duty upon him that he should guide his nation to every good that he knew and warn them against every evil that he knew…"]Muslim[
Indeed, calling to Allaah was the mission of the Messengers in order to bring the people out from darkness into light. There are many basic principles upon which their calls were based, which were the starting point for calling to Allaah. These fundamental principles are:
1. Tawheed )Monotheism(
2. Prophethood
3. The Hereafter
Every book revealed by Allaah gave great importance to these points. The most important and sublime of these three principles and the most fundamental of them all is Tawheed )Oneness( of Allaah.
Allaah Says )which means(:"And We certainly sent into every nation a Messenger, )saying(: 'Worship Allaah and avoid Taaghoot )false objects of worship(.' "]Quran 16: 36[
Allaah has informed us about some of the Prophets, may Allaah exalt their mention, and how they faced their people. We see that all of them proceeded upon the universal way laid down by Allaah and followed the methodology Allaah established for all of them. Not a single one of them is at variance with it, Allaah Says )which means(:"And We had certainly sent Nooh to his people, )saying(: 'Indeed, I am to you a clear warner, that you not worship except Allaah. Indeed, I fear for you the punishment of a painful Day.'"]Quran 11: 25-26[
The noblest of all Prophets and the last of them, Muhammad bin ‘Abdullaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, )who was sent with the greatest, most complete and comprehensive message(, began with what all the Prophets, may Allaah exalt their mention, started their Da’wah )call( -- calling to the 'Aqeedah )creed( of Tawheed )Oneness of Allaah(, and calling for all worship to be made purely and sincerely for Allaah alone. Allaah's Messenger, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, started with the principle: 'Witness that none has the right to be worshipped except Allaah.'
Allaah Says )what means(:"Say, )O Muhammad(: 'O mankind, indeed I am the Messenger of Allaah to you all, )from him( to Whom belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth. There is no deity except Him; He gives life and causes death.' So believe in Allaah and His Messenger, the unlettered Prophet, who believes in Allaah and His words, and follow him that you may be guided."]Quran 7: 158[
The verses in this regard are many, what we quote here is just one example. With regard to the Sunnah )traditions and approved actions of Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam(, there are many clear indications that Allaah's Messenger began his call to Islam with Tawheed.
1.`Amr bin Abasah As-Sulami, may Allaah be pleased with him, said:"During the times of ignorance … I heard of a man in Makkah who received revelation. So I set upon my riding beast and came to him. At that time he was in hiding, due to the oppression of his people. So I behaved in a way that enabled me to gain access to him in Makkah. I said to him: "Who are you?" He replied: "I am a Prophet.' So I said: "And what is a Prophet?' He said: 'Allaah has sent me as a Messenger.' So I said: 'And what is it that He has sent you with?' He said: 'I have been sent to order the joining of ties of relationship, to break the idols, so that Allaah is worshipped Alone and nothing at all is associated in worship along with Him."]Muslim[
2.At the time of the peace of Hudaibiyyah, Hiraql )Heraclius( asked Abu Sufyaan some questions about Allaah's Messenger, among which he asked:"What does he )Muhammad( command you?" Abu Sufyaan replied: "He says, 'Worship Allaah Alone and do not worship anything else along with Him, and abandon what your fathers say. He also orders prayers, charity, and the joining of the ties of relationship.'"]Al-Bukhaari[
Consequently, the Prophets, may Allaah exalt their mention, did not come to bring about the downfall of one State to replace it with another. They did not seek sovereignty, nor did they organize political parties for this reason. Rather, they came for the guidance of humankind, to save it from misguidance and Shirk )polytheism(, and to take them out of darkness into light.
In this regard Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, gave an example about himself. He, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:"The similitude of me and the message with which Allaah has sent me, is like a man who came to some people and said: ‘I have seen the enemy forces with my own eyes and I am a mere warner )to you(. So, save yourselves, save yourselves!’ A group of his people obeyed him and went out at night, slowly and steadily and was safe; while another group belied him and stayed in their place until the morning when the army destroyed them. Such is the similitude of those who obey me and follow what I have brought )i.e., Message( and of those who disobey me and belie the Truth which I have brought."]Al-Bukhaari, Muslim and others[
The Message of the Messengers, by the Mercy of Allaah, revives and enlightens the believer’s soul. This enlightenment is the revelation of Allaah, which leads mankind from the darkness of Shirk )polytheism( and ignorance to the Light of Truth and Islam:"Allaah is the ally of those who believe. He brings them out from darkness into the light."]Quran 2: 257[
The Messenger and the Message are evidence against the disbelievers
Allaah sent His Messengers and His Books so that there can be no excuse for mankind on the Day of Judgment. The Quran says )what means(:")we sent( Messengers as bringers of good tidings and warners so that mankind will have no argument against Allaah after Messengers."]Quran 4: 165[
The Message of Allaah deals with the rights of Allaah on His bondsmen, the rights of man on His Creator, The Oneness of Allaah and its influence on the creation, knowledge, admonition, the wisdom behind the creation, righteousness, mutual interactions, refutation of incorrect beliefs and deviations, lawful and unlawful, migration and Jihaad. In totality, it is the complete code for righteous living, which results in delight, pleasure and harmony in this life and the Hereafter.
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Discover Islam, - The Oneness of Divinity

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Is there any convincing explanation for the secret of existence? The theory currently in vogue says that all existence is accidental and haphazard. In my opinion, only two ideologies remain in the realm of the probable. We can attribute life and universe to chance, and therefore, existence is meaningless. Alternatively, there is meaning of such magnitude to life, that, largely, it escapes us.
When we observe the orderly movements of the stars and planets, the regularity of the seasons, the uniformity and control of the law of nature over matter, energy and life, we realize that everything in the universe is knit into a single harmonious system.
Any one who looks at this great phenomenon and comes to the conclusion that it evolved on its own or by accident, must question his reasoning. Even an old watch, which has a simple mechanism of pulleys implies that there must be a watchmaker.
Albert Einstein, the most famous scientist of modern times, tells us: "Everyone who is seriously involved in the pursuit of Science becomes convinced that a Spirit is manifest in the Law of the Universe, without concluding that there must be Divine intent behind it all. Speaking for myself, I can only say that the grandeur of the Cosmos serves to confirm my belief in the certainty of the Creator." In the most quotable quote, he said about the emergence of the universe by chance: "God does not play dice."
In fact, throughout history, humankind as a whole has never denied the existence of a Creator. However, cultures have misunderstood His Nature and associated a mass of mythology with Him.
There is a Force in action to keep everything in order. In nature, there is a Creator who has created the most charming scenery. Believers recognize this Creator and call Him Allaah or God. He is not a man, because no man can create another man. He is not an animal, or a plant. He is not an idol or a statue because these things cannot create themselves or anything else. Neither is He the Sun or the Moon or a machine or a star, but the Maker and Keeper of all. The Maker of anything is greater than the thing He has created. The more complex a thing is, the more complex it’s Creator.
The Holy Quran says )what means(:“Ask of them: 'Who is the Sustainer of the heavens and the earth?' If they hesitate, say: 'Allaah'. Then ask: 'Then why do you take for protectors, instead of Him, other deities who have no power to benefit or avert harm from themselves?' Say: 'Are the blind equal to those who see?' Or do they assign to Allaah partners who have created anything as He has created, so that the creation seemed to them similar? Say: 'Allaah is the Creator of all things. He is the One, the Almighty".]Quran 13: 16[
What is the true nature of the Creator? He certainly cannot be like the created things, for then He would be limited and corruptible like them. Only a Being possessing Absolute Knowledge, Power and Authority and the ability to keep Himself eternally alive, can give life and sustain life and be the Creator of the Universe and its creatures.
The question that now arises is: "Could there be more than one Absolute Creator?" If, for instance, there were two creators and they disagreed over the creation of something, then, either one would have to overcome the other, in which case the defeated one would not have been absolutely powerful. Or they would neutralize each other, in which case both would have been limited in power. Even if we assume they both agreed on everything, still they could not both be absolutely powerful, because the action of one would then depend on the condition that the other does not interfere.
Once again, the Quran tells us )what means(:"He to Whom the Dominion over the heavens and the earth belongs, has begotten no son and has no partner in his kingdom, for it is He who creates everything and determines its nature in accordance with His own design. And yet some choose to worship, instead of Him, imaginary deities that cannot create anything but are themselves created, which can neither avert harm nor help even themselves, and which have no power over life or death nor power to resurrect.”]Quran 25: 2-3[
The Oneness of Allaah is the foundation of belief. Islam rests upon Tawheed: "Laa ilaaha illallaah" -- there is None worthy of worship except Allaah, none worthy of praise, there is no god except Him, no one. Throughout the Quran, the refrain runs on and on: laa ilaaha illaa Allaah, laa ilaaha illaa huwa, Allaahu laa ilaaha illa huwa, Allaahu ahad…which means that Allaah is One, the only One.
Islam is the religion in which the first deadly sin is fabricating partners unto God. It is the only sin that will not be forgiven. The Quran reiterates, not once but twice in the same chapter )what means(:“Allaah forgives not that partners should be set up with Him; but He forgives anything else to whom he pleases; to set up partners with Allaah is to devise a sin most heinous indeed."]Quran 4: 48, 116[
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Discover Islam, - The fossil record refutes evolution

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Contrary to evolutionists' expectations, fossil records provide proof of Creation, not evolution of species
According to the theory of evolution, every living species has sprung from a predecessor. A previously-existing species turned into 'something else' with time and all species have come into being in this way. According the theory, this transformation proceeds gradually over millions of years. If this was the case, then numerous intermediary species should have existed and lived within this long transformation period.
For instance, some half-fish/half-reptiles should have lived in the past, which had acquired some reptilian traits in addition to the fish traits they already had. Or there should have existed some reptile-birds, which acquired some bird traits in addition to the reptilian traits they are believed to have had in the past, as “transitional forms.”
If such animals had really existed, there should be millions and even billions of them in number and variety. More importantly, the remains of these strange creatures should be present in fossil records. The number of these transitional forms should have been even greater than the present animal species and their remains should be found all over the world. InThe Origin of Species,Darwinexplained:
"If my theory be true, numberless intermediate varieties, linking most closely all of the species of the same group together must assuredly have existed.. Consequently evidence of their former existence could be found only amongst fossil remains."
Even Darwin himself was aware of the absence of such transitional forms. It was his hope that they would be found in the future. Despite his hopefulness, he realised that the biggest stumbling-block in his theory was the missing transitional forms. Therefore in his bookThe Origin of Specieshe wrote the following in the chapter “Difficulties of the Theory”:
" …Why, if species have descended from other species by fine gradations, do we everywhere see innumerable transitional forms? Why is not all nature in confusion, instead of the species being, as we see them, well defined?… But, as by this theory innumerable transitional form must have existed, why do we not find them embedded in countless numbers in the crust to the earth?… But in the intermediate region, having intermediate conditions of life, why do we not now find closely-linking intermediate varieties? This difficulty for a long time quite confounded me.”
The single explanationDarwincould come up with to counter this objection was the argument that the fossil record uncovered so far was inadequate. He asserted that when the fossil record had been studied in detail, the missing links would be found.
Believing inDarwin’s prophecy, evolutionists have been searching for fossils and digging for missing links since the middle of the 19thcentury CE, all over the world. Despite their best efforts, no transitional forms have yet been uncovered. All the fossils unearthed in excavations showed that contrary to the beliefs of evolutionists, life appeared on earth all of a sudden and fully-formed. In their enthusiastic efforts to prove their theory, evolutionists have instead unwittingly caused it to collapse.
A famous British paleontologist, Derek V. Ager, admits this fact even though he is an evolutionist:
"The point emerges that if we examine the fossil record in detail, whether at the level of orders or of species, we find – over and over again – not gradual evolution, but the sudden explosion of one group at the expense of another."
Another evolutionist paleontologist Mark Czarnecki comments as follows:
"A major problem in providing the theory has been the fossil record; the imprints of vanished species preserved in the Earth’s geological formations. This record has never revealed traces ofDarwin’s hypothetical intermediate variants – instead species appear and disappear abruptly, and this anomaly has fueled the creationist argument that each species was created by God."
They have also had to deal with the futility of waiting for “missing” transitional forms to appear in the future, as explained by a professor of paleontology fromGlasgowUniversity, T. Neville George:
"There is no need to apologise any longer for the poverty of the fossil record. In some ways, it has become almost unmanageably rich and discovery is outpacing integration…The fossil record nevertheless continues to be composed mainly of gaps. "
Life emerged on earth suddenly and in complex forms
When terrestrial strata and fossil records are examined, it is seen that all living organisms appeared simultaneously. The oldest stratum of the earth in which fossils of living creatures have been found is that of the Cambrian, which has an estimated age of 500-550 million years.
Living creatures found in the strata belonging to the Cambrian period emerged all of a sudden in the fossil record -- there are no pre-existing ancestors. The fossils found in the Cambrian rocks belonged to snails, trilobites, sponges, earthworms, jellyfish, sea hedgehogs and other complex invertebrates. This wide mosaic of living organisms made up of such a great number of complex creatures emerged so suddenly, that this miraculous event is referred to as the “Cambrian Explosion” in geological literature.
Most of the life forms found in these strata have complex systems like eyes, gills, circulatory system and advanced physiological structures no different from their modern counterparts. For instance, the double-lensed, combined eye structure of trilobites is a wonder of design. David Raup, a professor of geology at Harvard, Rochester andChicagoUniversities says: “The trilobites used an optimal design which would require a well trained and imaginative optical engineer to develop today”.
These complex invertebrates emerged suddenly and completely without having any link or any transitional form between them and the unicellular organisms, which were the only life forms on earth prior to them.
Richard Monastersky, the editor ofEarth Sciences, one of the popular publications of evolutionist literature, states the following about the “Cambrian Explosion” which came as a total surprise to evolutionists:
"A half-billion years ago, the remarkably complex forms of animals we see today suddenly appeared. This moment, right at the start of Earth’s Cambrian Period, some 550 million years ago, marks the evolutionary explosion that filled the seas with the world’s first complex creatures. The large animal phyla of today were present already in the early Cambrian and they were as distinct from each other as they are today."
How did the earth come to overflow with such a great number of animal species all of a sudden? How could these distinct types of species with no common ancestors emerge? These are questions that remain unanswered by evolutionists. TheOxfordzoologist Richard Dawkins, one of the foremost advocates of evolutionist thought in the world, comments on this reality that invalidates the very roots of all the arguments he has been defending:
"For example the Cambrian strata of rocks, vintage about 600 million years, are the oldest ones in which we find most of the major invertebrate groups. And we find many of them already in an advanced state of evolution, the very first time they appear. It is as though they were just planted there, without any evolutionary history. Needless to say, this appearance of sudden planting has delighted creationists."
As Dawkins is forced to acknowledge, the Cambrian Explosion is strong evidence for creation, because creation is the only way to explain the fully-formed emergence of life on earth. Douglas Futuyma, a prominent evolutionist biologist admits this fact and states: “Organisms either appeared on the earth fully developed or they did not. If they did not, they must have developed from pre-existing species by some process of modification. If they did appear in a fully developed state, they must indeed have been created by some omnipotent intelligence.”
Darwin himself recognized the possibility of this when he wrote: “If numerous species, belonging to the same genera of families, have really started into life all at once, the fact would be fatal to the theory of descent with slow modification.”
The Cambrian Period is nothing more or less thanDarwin’s “fatal stroke”. This is why the Swiss evolutionist and paleoanthropologist Stefan Bengston confesses to the lack of transitional links while he describes the Cambrian Period and says: “Baffling )and embarrassing( to Darwin, this event still dazzles us.''
As may be seen, the fossil record indicates that living things did not evolve from primitive to advanced forms, but instead emerged all of a sudden and in a perfect state. In short, living beings did not come into existence by evolution, they were created.
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