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Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Youth, - Advice to women regarding marriage – I













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Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, reported that the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam said:“If a man whose religious commitment and moral conduct you approve of proposes for marriage to your daughter, then marry her to him; otherwise, trials will prevail and great corruption will spread upon the earth.”]At-Tirmithi & Ibn Maajah[ Imaam As-Sindi, may Allaah have mercy upon him, commented upon this narration, saying: “A person’s religious commitment assures fulfilling his obligations, and his good moral conduct assures his kind treatment of others.”
The spread of corruption and evil is the natural result of people refusing to marry their daughters off to men whose religious practice and morals are good, preferring instead to delay and marry them to those with more wealth, or from a more honourable lineage. This results in many young men and women remaining unmarried, which causes fornication to prevail, immorality to overwhelm, and chastity to vanish.
Imaam At-Teebi, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said: “This narration supports the ruling of Imaam Maalik over the others, in which he )i.e. Maalik( said that competence for marriage should be based only on religious commitment and moral conduct.”
Some scholars have stated that if the guardian repeatedly rejects men who propose for marriage to his daughter for no legitimate Islamic reason, then this could nullify his guardianship over her.
Some women set impossible conditions for future husbands, such as him memorising the entire Quran as well as the Hadeeth collections of Al-Bukhaari, Muslim and so on. Moreover, some of them may even go as far as to demand a man whose character is like that of Imaam Al-Bukhaari, may Allaah have mercy upon him.
This is totally incorrect; all a man has to meet are the two conditions set in the abovementioned narration; namely, religious commitment and a high moral character.
How can pious men and women be brought together in marriage?
The righteous men and women in the community should play a strong role in this. For example, the wife could become a contact for the women and the husband for the men. The young women should not give up the condition of the man being religious on the pretext that they will work on him and transform him to a pious man after marriage, unless the man is known to adhere, in general, to his Islamic obligations, as well as having noble morals and shunning sins. In such a case, he may be a candidate worth considering.
People’s stance when asked about the man proposing:
Some people, when asked about a man who is proposing to their daughter, give general answers and avoid being precise. They say things like: ‘He is a nice man’, ‘He is a kind person’, ‘His father is a good man and his grandfather was religious’, ‘Much good is expected from him and he is handsome’, ‘He is polite and wealthy’ and so on. It is after the marriage takes place that the bitter reality surfaces and the young woman come to know him for who he really is, only after it is too late.
Others conceal the faults of the proposing man when asked about him due to the fear of him, or what he may do if he found out, or because they think that to do otherwise would be to backbite; but the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam said, when asked by Faatimah Bint Qays, may Allaah be pleased with her, about two Companions, may Allaah be pleased with them, who had proposed marriage to her:“Abu Jahm is a man who never lowers his stick )i.e. he beats his wives(, and as for Abu Sufyaan, he is extremely poor and possesses no wealth.”She said: “I like neither of them” The Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam said:“Marry Usaamah Bin Zayd”So she married him and Allaah blessed their marriage, granting her a joyful life.
The one being asked should clarify everything he knows about the person who is proposing without exaggeration, and should fear Allaah regarding what he says. He should mention his merits as well as his faults; he should mention only that which he is certain of and act as if the young woman is his own daughter or sister. This is because marriage is a long term commitment and not an interim one. Marriage is a relationship that is meant to last until the grave, unless there is a valid reason to end it; and divorce frequently occurs when people marry their daughter to a person whom they do not know well enough.
The behaviour of some young women who seek marriage:
Some young women offer themselves in marriage to young men over the telephone, which is disastrous as the man may be a sinner, and some sins are more lethal than others. For example, if the man deals in Ribaa )i.e. interest or usury( then his and his family’s provision, food, drinks and clothing will be ill-gotten. Moreover, even a sinner would not typically marry a woman who offers herself to him on the telephone. He may play around with her for a while, but when he is serious in his search for a wife, he will seek a chaste and well-mannered woman. A man who had such a friend was amazed at seeing him marrying a young woman who was fully adherent to the Hijaab; upon asking why he did so, the friend replied: “I wish to marry a woman whom I would be sure of not finding in bed with another man upon returning home one day." This is how men perceive young women who freely and easily talk to them on the telephone.
The young woman and her family or guardian must investigate the man who is proposing to her so that they can discover whether or not he is putting on an act in order to appear as if he is a committed Muslim.
Histories:
It is not a condition for either of them to inform the other of their previous sins, especially if they have sincerely repented and then adhered to piety.
The vitalness of transparency:
It is very important that both the man and the woman are clear with one another from the very beginning and agree on everything before the contract is finalised.
If the family refuses the proposing man to see the daughter, then he should, at the very least, get a clear description of her.








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Youth, - Youth loved by Allaah - II













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Voluntary acts of worship means:
They areSunnah)Prophetic tradition(, recommended and voluntary acts of worship.
An example of the first category is the “Fixed voluntary prayers”:
They are tenRak‘ahs)units of prayer( if the person is not travelling. It is narrated that the Messenger of Allaah,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam,used to observe them. ‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Umar, may Allaah be pleased with him, said,“I remember ten Rak‘ahs )of voluntary prayers( from the Prophet, two Rak‘ahs before the Thuhr )Noon( prayer and two after it; two Rak‘ahs after Maghrib )Sunset( prayer in his house, and two Rak‘ahs after ‘Ishaa’ )Night( prayer in his house, and two Rak‘ahs before the Fajr )Dawn( prayer.”]Al-Bukhaari[
The Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, used to pray fourRak‘ahsbeforeThuhr. ‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, narrated that the Messenger of Allaah,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, did not leave the fourRak‘ahsbeforeThuhr.
The Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:“Whoever observes twelve voluntary Rak‘ahs in a day and night, a house will be built for him in Paradise.”]Muslim[
One of the voluntary prayers that the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam,used to observe isAl-Witr. He did not use to miss it and the voluntaryFajrprayer either when traveling or residing at home. He commanded and said:“Let the Witr be the last prayer you offer )at night(.”]Al-Bukhaari[
The second category )recommended acts of worship(:
This is like theDhuha)forenoon( prayer. About its virtue, Abu Tharr, may Allaah be pleased with him, said that the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:“When you get up in the morning, charity is due from every one of your joints. There is charity in every ascription of glory to Allaah )saying Subhaan Allaah(; there is charity in every declaration of His Greatness )saying Allaahu Akbar(; there is charity in every utterance of His praise )saying Alhamdulillaah(; there is charity in every declaration that none is truly worthy of worship but Him )saying Laa Ilaaha illa Allaah(; there is charity in enjoining good; there is charity in forbidding evil; and two Rak‘ahs of Dhuha )Forenoon prayer( is equal to all this )in reward(.”]Muslim[
The third category )voluntary acts of worship(:
It is the voluntary and extra acts of worship like offering twoRak‘ahsbeforeMaghribprayer. ‘Abdullaah Al-Muzani, may Allaah be pleased with him, said that the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:“Perform two Rak‘ahs before Maghrib prayer.”He, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, repeated it twice; when repeating it for the third time he added:“Whoever may so wish.”]Al-Bukhaari[ He concluded this order with this sentence out of fearing that people may take it as a fixed voluntary prayer.
Taraaweehprayer wherein we perceive the fragrance of the blessed month ofRamadanis under this category. It is offered inRamadan, the month of mercy which is full with spirituality that makes the person ready to live in the atmosphere of this prayer.
A moment with Qiyaam Al-Layl prayer:
It is, by Allaah, the precious moments where tears fall. It is purity for the self and its ascension to its Lord. It diffuses tranquility and peacefulness in the heart. Through it, you renew the custom of the righteous predecessors. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}They used to sleep but little of the night{]Quran 51:17[ Through it, you will share with the firm young believers of today the sweetness of this worship.
The preoccupations of life and its luring temptations push many young people towards the spring of clarity where they drink sweet water refining their souls and easing their minds and bodies. This spring can be found in the dead of night, in the depths of silence where the calls ofAthaanare raised filling us with longing to stand up to pray at night with strong determination.
You should seize the chance and train yourself to perform voluntary night prayer in order to revive your night.
Come to virtue!
To talk about the virtues of theseSunanand recommended acts of worship, we need many pages. However, I will bring you a bunch of flowers and ripe fruits from its delightful garden to stir you and rekindle your faith:
Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, said that the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:“The most excellent fasting after the month of Ramadan is the fasting of the month of Allaah Al-Muharram. The most excellent prayer after the obligatory prayer is the voluntary night prayer.”]Muslim[
‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Umar, may Allaah be pleased with him, said that the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:“Let Witr be your last prayer to be offered at night.”]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
‘Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, said,“The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, used to pray eleven Rak‘ahs at night in the period between ‘Ishaa’ prayer and Fajr prayer. He used to end the prayer after every two Rak‘ahs observing the Witr with a single Rak‘ah.”]Muslim[
If you, young people, continue to establish your lives by observing obligatory acts of worship and then enrich your lives with performing voluntary acts of worship, you will move from the rank and degree of loving to the degree of being loved and will become youth that are beloved by Allaah The Almighty. How excellent is a young man who walks on the earth while he is beloved by Allaah above the heavens. It is a real joy and pleasure indeed on the day of much grief and many regrets. So, hasten to do good deeds with a sound pure heart because hastiness is praised in this regard and it is a sign of those who are guided. Ibn Al-Qayyim, may Allaah have mercy upon him, indicated this in his bookTareeq Al-Hijratayn:
The concern of the one who is foremost in good deeds is to gain profits and to load items of trade because of his knowledge with the profits to be. He sees that it is loss to save something he has without trading with it. He finds his profits on the day when traders are joyful with their profits. As a trader, he knows that there is a country before him where one dirham can gain ten dirhams up to seven hundred and more. He knows well the road to this land and its traders. If he can sell his clothes and all that he owns to prepare himself to trade in this country, he will do so. This is the example of the person who is foremost in good deeds by the permission of his Lord. He sees that it is a true loss to let time pass without trading.









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Dought & clear, - ** Is it permissible forone who has committed zina (fornication or adultery) to get married after he or she has repented?













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** I am a muslim that converted about three years ago. I am still learning and I have a question. I have been told that if I had sex after I converted I would not be able to islamically get married under the ways of islam. I wanted to know if this is true and if it is, is there any way to correct the deed that I am so very sorry for.
Praise be to Allaah.
The one who has committed zina (fornication or adultery) has to repent, because zina is one of the major sins which are forbidden in Islam and for which a stern warning is issued to the one who does them. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourseand whoever does this shall receive the punishment.
The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace”
[al-Furqaan 25:68-69]
The punishment must be carried out in this world on the one who has committed zina (fornication or adultery), as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“The fornicatress and the fornicator, flog each of them with a hundred stripes. Let not pity withhold you in their case, in a punishment prescribed by Allaah, if you believe in Allaah and the Last Day. And let a party of the believers witness their punishment”
[al-Noor 24:2]
It was narrated in a hadeeth from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Receive (teaching) from me, receive (teaching) from me. Allaah has ordained a way for those (women). When an unmarried male commits adultery with an unmarried female, (they should receive) one hundred lashes and banishment for one year. And in the case of a married male committing adultery with a married female, they shall receive one hundred lashes and be stoned to death.”
(Narrated by Muslim,al-Hudood, 3199).
Allaah has forbidden the believers to marry a person who commits zina, whether man or woman. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“The adulterer — fornicator marries not but an adulteress — fornicatress or a Mushrikah; and the adulteress –fornicatress, none marries her except an adulterer — fornicater or a Mushrik [and that means that the man who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrikah (female polytheist, pagan or idolatress) or a prostitute, then surely, he is either an adulterer — fornicator, or a Mushrik (polytheist, pagan or idolater). And the woman who agrees to marry (have a sexual relation with) a Mushrik (polytheist, pagan or idolater) or an adulterer — fornicator, then she is either a prostitute or a Mushrikah (female polytheist, pagan, or idolatress)]. Such a thing is forbidden to the believers (of Islamic Monotheism)”
[al-Noor 24:3]
If the one who has committed zina repents to Allaah, truly and sincerely, then Allaah will forgive him or her, and overlook the sin. Allaah says, after mentioning the warning to those who commit zina:
“Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft Forgiving, Most Merciful.
And whosoever repents and does righteous good deeds; then verily, he repents towards Allaah with true repentance”
[al-Furqaan 25:70-71 – interpretation of the meaning]
If the person repents sincerely, then it becomes permissible for him or her to get married, after they give up this sin.
Shaykh Muhammad ibn Ibraaheem was asked about the ruling on getting married to a woman who has committed zina. He said: “it is not permissible to marry the woman who has committed adultery until she repents… if a man wants to marry her, he has to be sure that she is not pregnant, by waiting until she has a period before he does the marriage contract with her. If she is pregnant, then it is not permissible for him to marry her until she has given birth.”
Seeal-Fataawa al-Jaami’ah li’l-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, 2/584









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