Dought & clear, - She feels sad and depressed, and is asking forthe solution

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I am a twenty-four year old woman. I feel sad almost all the time, and have no desire to make contact with people. I feel very lonely and as if nothing could make me happy, even though I offer all the obligatory prayers, even Fajr on time, I pray qiyaam al-layl, I read a juz’ of Qur’an every day in order to complete it once every month, I try to draw closer to Allah and I have performed ‘Umrah more than once. But these feelings are not going away. Praise be to Allah, I am blessed, my life is pretty good and is better than many, praise be to Allah. I acknowledge that and I give thanks to Allah for it; I hope that He will not call me to account for my negative feelings. But I do not know what is the cause of these bad feelings. This has been going on for more than a year, and started before the unfortunate developments that have occurred in the Arab world. It has gotten worse with the killings in our country and the loss of relatives of some friends of mine. How can I overcome this negativity?
Praise be to Allah
Firstly:
First of all we would like to welcome you to the Islam Q&A website. We ask Allah to benefit us and you by means of what we say, and to relieve us and our Muslim ummah of distress.
Trouble is inevitable in the life of this world; this is how Allah has decreed it and He has made it a place of trials and tests, and a bridge to the hereafter. Even the best of His creation, the Prophets, were never free of troubles. Life is never plain sailing for anyone, young or old. You may have reason to rejoice one day, then reason to feel sad for many other days; this is how it always is in the life of this world and this is how people are all the time.
Who among us has not felt grief and sorrow as a result of the calamities we see befalling the Muslims, day after day? Who among us has not lost interest in this world and everything in it, because of what we hear or see?
But when these feelings of sadness and loneliness or bad moods persist and prevent us from living a normal life or carrying out the duties that are required of us, or fulfilling the rights of others, or they cause us to neglect the blessings of Allah has bestowed upon us and fail to give thanks for them as we should, at that point sadness moves from being something natural to being a case of weakness and sickness that needs to be treated.
There is no greater remedy for that than patience and fearing Allah, and thinking positively of Allah, the Lord of the Worlds, putting one’s trust in Him, delegating one’s affairs to Him and turning to Him in all times of calamity.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Many people, when they see evil or when the Muslim ummah goes through a lot of trouble, panic, lose hope and start complaining as people who are beset by calamities do. But this is forbidden; rather what is enjoined is to be patient, to put one’s trust in Allah, to be steadfast in adhering to the religion of Islam and to believe that Allah is with those who fear Him and those who do good, and that the best end is for those who fear Him; whatever befalls him is because of his sins, so he should be patient, for the promise of Allah is true; he should seek forgiveness for his sins and glorify and praise his Lord morning and evening.
End quote fromMajmoo‘ al-Fataawa, 18/295
Secondly:
If the state of grief worsens and leads to some level of depression, then in addition to this spiritual remedy, showing patience, putting one’s trust in Allah and always remembering Him, medical attention from a knowledgeable and trustworthy specialist is also needed.
The symptoms of depression include the following:
· always feeling sad, anxious and in a bad mood
· loss of interest and lack of enjoyment in activities that people usually enjoy
· constant pessimism and feeling helpless in the face of life’s problems
· feelings of guilt, worthlessness and social alienation
· inability to show or express feelings towards others or to accept feelings from others
· trouble sleeping, such as insomnia, sleeping too long or waking up too early
· eating problems (overeating or loss of appetite)
· chronic physical pain from which no remedy brings relief
· weepiness
· getting tense quickly; hyperactivity and not being able to calm down and relax
· constant feelings of tiredness and inability to do any physical activity
· inability to concentrate, remember or take sound decisions
If four or more of the symptoms mentioned above are present, then you should consult a specialist in psychology, as mentioned above.
In addition to seeking medical treatment, you should try to keep yourself busy with useful activities, such as reading Qur’an and other books, and engaging in hobbies and so on. Do not forget some natural remedies that will re-energise you and help the brain to regain energy, such as honey and dried fruits.
One of the prescriptions that was often used in the past is talbeenah. According to a saheeh report, the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said concerning it: “Talbeenah brings comfort to the sick person and it lessens grief.”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5101; Muslim, 2216
Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allah have mercy on him) said inZaad al-Ma‘aad:
This broth clears that from the stomach and intestines, cleanses it, makes it flow, makes it more liquid, adjusts it, and restores balance. Thus it gives relief, especially for the one who usually eats barley bread, which was the custom of the people of Madinah at that time; it was their staple food, as wheat was very expensive for them. And Allah knows best.
Talbeenah is a broth made from barley flour with its bran, to which a cup of water is added, and it is heated on a low fire for five minutes, then a cup of milk and a spoonful of honey is added.
And Allah knows best.







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For children, - Islamic Ethics and Morality: Why are Gheebat and Tohmat Haraam?

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They are Haraam because they spoil people's names and characters. When you speak badly of someone, you make others think badly of them. Another reason why it is bad is because the people are not there to defend themselves. If you hear wicked things about others, you should give the others a chance to defend themselves by explaining, before you believe what you hear.
Gheebat and Tohmat are a result of Jealousy. If a person is respected, has done good, has helped others, there will always be people who are angry and bitter that such a person is respected by all. The result is to try and slander and destroy this reputation by sowing seed of venom in their character, by telling the world lies so that the respect turns to outrage and shame. Such people are cursed by Allah (SWT), and are referred to as the evil whispers of mankind.
Allegation is more severe sin than backbiting. It is clear from traditions that anyone who levels allegations against a believer is condemnable.
Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) declared, If a person levels an allegation against a believing man or woman for an act, which he/she has not done, then on the Day of Judgment, Allah, the Almighty, shall put him on a piece of fire until he is chastised for leveling that allegation.
Imam Sadiq (a.s.) narrates, When a believer levels an allegation against another believer, his faith dissolves just as salt dissolves in water.
Imam Sadiq (a.s.)said further, If a believer accuses another believer (while the latter is innocent), then the honour and dignity that exists between two believers will vanish.
That is why we have been instructed in traditions to restrain ourselves to the best of our ability from thinking evil of a believer.
Rely on the positive points of your believer brother's conduct until you don't get confirmed evidence which prevails upon your existing knowledge of the brother. Do not think evil about the words of a believer in whose defense you can find at least one good fact.
Ameerul Momineen (a.s.) exhorts, Consider the word or action of a believer brother to be good, even if you are offended, and always think optimistically (about him) to the utmost. Do not think bad about him. If you do not get excuse in good actions, search for it over and over again, until the number (of excuses) reaches 70, if you still cannot find it, then think that we ourselves cannot think good about him.
Many times we find that our conversation with somebody about another believer turns out to be completely false. A person asked Ameerul Momineen (a.s.), What is the distance between right and wrong? Imam Ali (a.s.) replied, 'Four fingers'. Imam Ali (a.s.) then placed his four fingers between the eye and ear and said, 'that which is seen by the eye is true and that which is heard by the ear is mostly wrong or false.'
That is why before accusing anybody we should ponder on this fact.
Ameerul Momineen (a.s.)reveals, Happy is that person who is busy in searching for his own defects and is unaware of the defects of others.
Make your intellect suspicious (accuse yourself) of your own defects, for in most cases, self-confidence and self-reliance are the chief causes of mistakes.
In another tradition it is narrated, One who calls himself bad, is saved from Satan's deception.
Just as leveling allegations against someone is prohibited, in the same way a person should refrain from going to places where he may become the target of accusation.
Imam Ali (a.s.) advises: Refrain from the assemblies of allegation and suspicion because the companion of bad people is often deceived by them.
Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) said, He is more accused of Tohmat (allegation) who sits with the gathering of accusers.
Imam Ali (a.s.) revealed, He who sits in a place where Tohmat (allegations) are leveled, should not blame those who entertain bad ideas about him.
The one who is seen in the assembly of dubious and suspicious characters will find himself a target of accusations and allegations. These traditions highlight that even sitting or being seen with evil people can be harmful for our reputation (even if we don't participate in their evil).
Ridiculing others- a despicable trait: Satan rules when the hearts are constricted and thoughts are perverted. Then man tends to exaggerate even the smallest of matters. Under Satan's domination, he begins to humiliate and ridicule his friends and colleagues. He brands this ridiculing as bravery and courage and prides himself on it. As a matter of fact, he even expects praise and acclaim for this.
Imam Sadiq (a.s.) narrates on the authority of the Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.): O Ali, there is no poverty greater than ignorance and there is no wealth superior to intellect.
According to the prophetic tradition narrated above, the most ignorant of all people today are the Muslims because we have lagged the others in pursuit of knowledge. We have embraced this world as if earning money is the sole objective of life. To acquire money we are prepared to forego religion, faith, certainty and intellect, while the Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) has made intellect the most superior wealth. Indeed we must reflect on the fact that with the wealth of intellect, the world will be at our feet and we will not have to chase the world.
Imam Sadiq (a.s.) relates from Ameerul Momineen (a.s.), Pride and egotism are signs of weak intellect.
It is a fact that arrogance, pride and egotism may apparently make a man seem very successful in this world, but these very traits are the root cause of his destruction. Pride and conceit are the best indicators of a weak intellect and a person with a weak intellect is capable of initiating a step that can prove ruinous for him socially and/or personally. This is the disease that afflicts most Muslims. We have been split into so many groups and sects because of these evil traits. The soul of Islam has been torn apart due to this and what little dignity and honour is left in it also seems to be waning fast. That is why it is important for us to maintain its (soul of Islam's) dignity and nobility.
The Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) declared, The most humiliating of men is the one who ridicules others.
These words of the Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) highlight the fact that there is no place for narrow-mindedness, prejudice and bias in Islam. On the one hand, Islam emphasises the Majesty and Glory of Allah and on the other hand highlights brotherhood and fraternity between the creatures. The level of ethics and morals in Islam can be gauged from the saying of the Prophet Mohammed (s.a.w.s.) when he (s.a.w.s.) calls the ridiculing person as the most degraded of people. That is why as believers and Muslims, it is important for us to respect and uphold the dignity and honour of others around us.
Imam Sadiq (a.s.) exhorts the Shias: Fear Allah! Be a source of ornamentation for us and do not be a source of disgrace for us.
These words of Imam Sadiq (a.s.) not only are an invitation towards goodness and virtue, they are also an indication of the standard of love and Wilayat of Ahle Bait (a.s.). Being Shias of Ahle Bait (a.s.), it is important that we always keep these standards in mind.
The true Shia of Ahle Bait (a.s.) always abstains from sins and abominable acts (makroohat). At the same time, they always hasten towards the obligatory and recommended (mustahabbat) acts. That is why if we truly love the Ahle Bait (a.s.), we must observe the laws of Shariat at all times and try to be a source of pride and happiness for them. With this, even the people of the world will be able to appreciate the true greatness of the Ahle Bait (a.s.).











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Welcome to Islam, - Worship in Islam

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The concept of worship in Islam differs from that found in other religions and is, therefore, subject to misunderstanding. In general, worship is understood to mean the observance of certain rituals: prayer, fasting, giving charity, and other 'good' works. In Islam, however, worship is much more; it is one's entire life. The definition goes something like this: "Worship is an all-inclusive term for those internal and external sayings and actions of a person that are pleasing to Allaah." In other words, worship is that which is done in obedience to Allaah's will, which obviously includes rituals but goes far beyond to the realms of one’s beliefs, social activities, and personal contributions to one's society and fellow human beings.
Islam looks at the individual as a whole. He is required to submit completely to Allaah, as the Quran instructed Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu 'alayhi wasallam to do; Allaah Says )what means(:“Say: ‘Indeed, my prayer, my rites of sacrifice, my living and my dying are for Allaah, Lord of the worlds. No partner has He. And this I have been commanded, and I am the first ]among you[ of the Muslims.’”]Quran: 6:162-163[
The natural result of this submission is that one's activities should conform to the instructions of the One to whom the person is submitting - Allaah. Islam requires that its followers conduct every aspect of their lives according to its teachings. This might sound strange to those who view religion as a personal relationship between the individual and his Lord and which should have no relevance to those activities that are not connected specifically with any religious rituals.
The Prophet Muhammad sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam taught his followers that Islam is much more than a private personal matter. Islam attaches no value to rituals that are performed mechanically and have no influence on one's inner life. This issue was addressed in an incident when Muslims, as well as local Jews and Christians, disputed about the prayer direction being changed from Jerusalem to the Ka'bah )the Sacred Mosque( in Makkah: Allaah Says )what means(:“Righteousness is not that you turn your faces toward the east or the west, but ]true[ righteousness is ]in[ one who believes in Allaah, the Last Day, the Angels, the Book, and the prophets and gives wealth, in spite of love for it, to relatives, orphans, the needy, the traveller, those who ask ]for help[, and for freeing slaves; ]and who[ establishes prayer and gives Zakaah; ]those who[ fulfil their promise when they promise; and ]those who[ are patient in poverty and hardship and during battle. Those are the ones who have been true, and it is those who are the righteous.”]Quran: 2:177[
The deeds mentioned in the above verse are indications that a person is righteous.
Honest work is considered a type of worship. The Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam said:"Whoever finds himself at nightfall tired of his work, Allaah will forgive his sins."Seeking knowledge is one of the highest forms of worship. The Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam told his companions that"Seeking knowledge is a )religious( duty on every Muslim."Social courtesy and cooperation, when done for the sake of Allaah, are also a part of worship:"Receiving your friend with a smile is a type of charity, helping a person to load his animal is a charity, and putting some water in your neighbour's bucket is a charity."
In Islam, the performing of one's duties is also considered an act of worship. The Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam told us that whatever one spends on his family will be counted as an act of worship for which he will be rewarded, provided what he spent was acquired by Islamically acceptable means. Kindness to family members, no matter how small, is also viewed as an act of worship. Even activities that we enjoy very much, such as sexual relations with one's spouse, are considered acts of worship as long as they are performed in accordance with the relevant Quranic and prophetic guidelines. For example, the Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam once told his Companions that they would be rewarded even for engaging in sexual intercourse with their wives. They were astonished and asked:"Are we to be rewarded for doing something that we enjoy very much?"The Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam replied:"If you satisfy your desires illegally, will you be punished?"They replied:"Yes."So the Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam said:"So for satisfying it legally with your wives, you will be rewarded."
It is clear from the previous discussion that the concept of worship in Islam is a comprehensive concept that includes all of the positive activities engaged in by an individual. This is in agreement with the all-inclusive nature of Islam, which regulates life on the individual, social, economic, political, spiritual, and all other levels of one's life.
Discussing non-ritualistic types of worship first does not mean those that are ritualistic are of less importance. In fact, if the latter are performed correctly and sincerely, they elevate the individual both spiritually and morally and actually help him to live a righteous life according to the guidance of Allaah.
Islam has several ritualistic activities that all Muslims are expected to perform. The most important one is the prayer )Salaah(, which must be performed according to a specific style. Its importance derives from the fact that it serves as the distinctive trait of a Muslim and because it prevents a Muslim from engaging in sinful activities by putting him into direct contact with Allaah five times a day. Thus, the ritual prayer is a chance for him to renew his covenant with Allaah and to seek His guidance anew.
The second most important pillar of Islam is Zakaat, a term that signifies giving to the less fortunate a certain percentage of one's earnings and holdings. Giving the poor their due and performing the prayer are usually mentioned together in the Quran, for they are both visible manifestations of one's Islamic faith and belief that Allaah is the sole owner of everything in the universe, which He allows man to enjoy as His trustee for a specific period of time.
In addition, this act provides a means to redistribute society's wealth in a way that reduces differences between classes and groups. It makes an important contribution to social stability, by purging the soul of the rich person from selfishness and the soul of the poor from envy and resentment against society. This blocks the channels leading to class hatred and makes it possible for the springs of brotherhood and solidarity to gush forth. Such stability is not merely based on the personal feelings of the rich; it stands on a firmly established right that, if denied by the rich, would be exacted by force, if necessary.
The month-long fast of Ramadan )Siyaam( is the third pillar of Islam. Its main function is to make the Muslim pure from "within," just as the external legal code )the Sharee'ah( makes his external actions pure. This process of purification makes it possible for him to respond to what is true and good and to shun what is false and evil.
Fasting, then, awakens an individual's conscience and permits it to share in a communal experience that is engaged in by the entire Muslim world at the same time. Fasting also reminds Muslims of those who are deprived of life's necessities throughout the year or throughout their lives. It makes them realise the suffering of their less fortunate Muslim brothers, a feeling that promotes in them a sense of sympathy and kindness towards Muslims and other people in general.
Lastly, we come to the annual pilgrimage to the House of Allaah )the Ka'bah( in Makkah. This ritual, known as the Hajj, is unique to Islam.
Muslims from all corners of the world, all attired in the same clothing, respond in one voice and one language with the following phrase upon entering the sacred precincts: "Labbayk Allaahumma Labbayk" )i.e., Here I am n response to your call, O Lord!(. This is a time of strict self-discipline and control where not only sacred things are revered, but even the life of plants and birds is made inviolable. Pilgrimage gives an opportunity for all Muslims, regardless of their affiliations with certain groups, classes, organisations, and governments, to meet annually in a great congress. All Muslims are invited to attend, for no individual or government can deny any Muslim the right to do so. Every Muslim who attends is guaranteed full safety and freedom as long as he does not violate its sanctity.
Thus, worship in Islam, whether ritual or non-ritual, trains the individual in such a way that he loves his Creator even more, which causes him to gain an unyielding will and a means to wipe out all evil and oppression from his society and to make the word of Allaah triumphant.


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