Question
Salam alaikum I have a grown up girl of 12, and i am considering
marriage to a man who has joint custody of his 13 yr old son. This
means his son will stay 4 days with him. What is the ruling behind the
situation esp if the son will be living int eh same house as my
daughter who would be a step sisters. jazakalla khair i look forward
to recieving your answer
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad,
is His Slave and Messenger.
If you marry that man and he has a son from another wife, then his son
is a non-Mahram )marriageable man( to your daughter, and thus it is
not permissible for them )i.e. his son and your daughter( to be in
seclusion with each other or to mix together in a suspicious manner.
Rather, they have to be considered strangers to each other.
Allaah Knows best.
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Islam is a religion of Mercy, Peace and Blessing. Its teachings emphasize kind hear tedness, help, sympathy, forgiveness, sacrifice, love and care.Qur’an, the Shari’ah and the life of our beloved Prophet (SAW) mirrors this attribute, and it should be reflected in the conduct of a Momin.Islam appreciates those who are kind to their fellow being,and dislikes them who are hard hearted, curt, and hypocrite.Recall that historical moment, when Prophet (SAW) entered Makkah as a conqueror. There was before him a multitude of surrendered enemies, former oppressors and persecutors, who had evicted the Muslims from their homes, deprived them of their belongings, humiliated and intimidated Prophet (SAW) hatched schemes for his murder and tortured and killed his companions. But Prophet (SAW) displayed his usual magnanimity, generosity, and kind heartedness by forgiving all of them and declaring general amnesty...Subhanallah. May Allah help us tailor our life according to the teachings of Islam. (Aameen)./-
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Saturday, October 26, 2013
Fathwa, - Step-brother is not a Mahram to his..
Story, - Love makes life beautiful
My love story starts different stages and diffrnt roles. Love give
both happy and painful, but love is so great why?
Every men and womens love at certain age i.e feeling in u r heart.
Love is told somebody infactuation and attraction. This is also true
but somebody love strong both oneside and twoside love. Her and him
wait untill success them love.
Love will do but luv is not life. My love story starts at studying
eighth class, her so beautiful, but i dont know what is love, every
day i will seen in class room and followed. She also looks this
process up to ningth class. I will join another school but but i don't
proposed some feeling in my heart every day remembering and feel some
days. This love end.
Intermediate no can do love, not coeducation, i interested on study.
Am studying average. Next love begin in engineering. One girl chose, i
will do sincerly, me only luv not her. She don't know luv to him. I
cant prpose in b.tech, after i prpose but her told u not like
both happy and painful, but love is so great why?
Every men and womens love at certain age i.e feeling in u r heart.
Love is told somebody infactuation and attraction. This is also true
but somebody love strong both oneside and twoside love. Her and him
wait untill success them love.
Love will do but luv is not life. My love story starts at studying
eighth class, her so beautiful, but i dont know what is love, every
day i will seen in class room and followed. She also looks this
process up to ningth class. I will join another school but but i don't
proposed some feeling in my heart every day remembering and feel some
days. This love end.
Intermediate no can do love, not coeducation, i interested on study.
Am studying average. Next love begin in engineering. One girl chose, i
will do sincerly, me only luv not her. She don't know luv to him. I
cant prpose in b.tech, after i prpose but her told u not like
Story, - Insecure love or true love..!
Hi i am 19 yr old, i love a 20 yr old guy whom i call caro. He is
really very adorable... our parents were fly friends.. His parents
were very cool n loving.. i knew them for almost 4 yrs but just 8
months back i became friendly with caro n fell in love with him.. :)
i confessed my love for love for him but he gave no reply... he still
behaved the same way he used to, he didn't change even a bit after
knowing my feelings for him.. It was very confusing and i wasn't able
to understand what was going on in his mind and what he felt about
me..
A month later something happened n his parents stoped talking to mine,
things changed, he was asked not to talk to any1 of us, yet he used to
talk to me and i was unaware of that. Once we went for a movie and
aunty came to know about it, she called me up n said that,"like a
mother i'm telling you, stop all this n i know u will obey like a
daughter". She had also taken away caro's mbl n sent him abroad..!!
For a month v dnt tlk, later on i contactd him through fb, he
replied... v were just tlking as friends then...
When he came bck to india i askd him wat he felt abt me?? he said he
is nt ready for a relationship nw n dat we will stay as friends for
nw..! i askd him wat abt the future? wil he evr b ready to be in a
relationship with me?? he said he doesnt knw n dat i shouldnt b
thinking abt it nw..! he still dnt knew dat his mum had askd me to
stop tlking to him n his dad had called up home to tell my parents to
break all the relations with them...!
i askd him if i should wait for him to be ready or forget abt him? he
told me dat he is nt ready for a relationship nw n he cannot tell
anything else...
a few days back i told him everything abt wat had happnd wen he wasnt
here, he said he was unaware of all dis..! i told him i didnt wanna
loose him, he said pray n everything will b alright..
he still tlks to me, wenevr i tell him i love him he eithr doesnt
reply or just smiles..!
i dnt knw wat he feels abt me!! aftr knwing dat our parents dnt want
us to tlk yet he tlks to me.. he never stoped me from loving him...!
he is really very nice n understanding bt i dnt knw wat should i do..!
i dnt knw if these r his signs of gently telling me dat he doesnt love
me coz he is too good to break my heart or a sign dat he may fall in
love with me..!
m risking my life for him n i dnt evn knw if he'l stand by be when his
parents come to knw dat i still tlk to him..! i really love caro alot
n hope that he does tell me soon abt his feelings for me n nt kip me
waiting in hopes more..!
really very adorable... our parents were fly friends.. His parents
were very cool n loving.. i knew them for almost 4 yrs but just 8
months back i became friendly with caro n fell in love with him.. :)
i confessed my love for love for him but he gave no reply... he still
behaved the same way he used to, he didn't change even a bit after
knowing my feelings for him.. It was very confusing and i wasn't able
to understand what was going on in his mind and what he felt about
me..
A month later something happened n his parents stoped talking to mine,
things changed, he was asked not to talk to any1 of us, yet he used to
talk to me and i was unaware of that. Once we went for a movie and
aunty came to know about it, she called me up n said that,"like a
mother i'm telling you, stop all this n i know u will obey like a
daughter". She had also taken away caro's mbl n sent him abroad..!!
For a month v dnt tlk, later on i contactd him through fb, he
replied... v were just tlking as friends then...
When he came bck to india i askd him wat he felt abt me?? he said he
is nt ready for a relationship nw n dat we will stay as friends for
nw..! i askd him wat abt the future? wil he evr b ready to be in a
relationship with me?? he said he doesnt knw n dat i shouldnt b
thinking abt it nw..! he still dnt knew dat his mum had askd me to
stop tlking to him n his dad had called up home to tell my parents to
break all the relations with them...!
i askd him if i should wait for him to be ready or forget abt him? he
told me dat he is nt ready for a relationship nw n he cannot tell
anything else...
a few days back i told him everything abt wat had happnd wen he wasnt
here, he said he was unaware of all dis..! i told him i didnt wanna
loose him, he said pray n everything will b alright..
he still tlks to me, wenevr i tell him i love him he eithr doesnt
reply or just smiles..!
i dnt knw wat he feels abt me!! aftr knwing dat our parents dnt want
us to tlk yet he tlks to me.. he never stoped me from loving him...!
he is really very nice n understanding bt i dnt knw wat should i do..!
i dnt knw if these r his signs of gently telling me dat he doesnt love
me coz he is too good to break my heart or a sign dat he may fall in
love with me..!
m risking my life for him n i dnt evn knw if he'l stand by be when his
parents come to knw dat i still tlk to him..! i really love caro alot
n hope that he does tell me soon abt his feelings for me n nt kip me
waiting in hopes more..!
Beliefs and Practices
Islam is the only religion in the world that says that its precepts
are natural. The Holy Quran says:
"..It is Allah's Nature on which Allah has created humans. There is no
change in Allah's creation. This is the established religion (deen
al-qayyim) but many of the humans know not." (Surat al-Room, Verse
30).
In Islam, thebeliefshave primary position; they are the roots, and
thepracticesare branches that are dependent for their existence on the
roots. The primary belief is that of the Unity and Supreme Sovereignty
of Allah, the Almighty, the Everpresent, the Everlasting, the
All-knowing. Allah is Just. He sent prophets to convey His message. He
selected Imams to safeguard His message. He ordained a Day of
Judgement when the deeds of His creatures will be measured and
rewarded or punished accordingly. Belief in Allah, therefore, entails
belief in all of the above.
Islam is the last divine religion and Prophet Muhammad (s) is the last
Messenger of Allah. In Islam, Allah has encompassed all His
commandments and decrees - decrees that will suffice for humankind til
the end of the world. The commandments are there not only to guide His
creatures to proper belief, but also to show them the proper way to
live their lives. Islam says that its practices are for benefit of the
followers, benefit in this world and in the hereafter.
The ethical and moral degeneration of the western society and the
predominance of suicide, drug abuse, and crime, seem to clearly
indicate that spiritual health of an individual and a community is as
important as physical health. The factors of physical and spiritual
well-being form the basis of Islamic practices. All that is necessary
for a person's spiritual and physical well-being is obligatory, and
all that is harmful is haram (prohibited). Islam shows ways of dealing
with the world around us; the responsibilities of a person to oneself,
to parents, to siblings, to offspring, to spouses, to neighbors, to
society, to nation; what habits to cultivate and what to avoid; what
things to possess and what to give away; what time to sleep and what
time to wake up; when and how to make love and when and how to refrain
from it; when to speak up and when to remain silent; what to eat; how
to eat; how to seek knowledge, etc. In short, Islam teaches values and
priorities concerned with every walk of life.
Islam fulfills all the needs of the human nature in such a way that by
following the path of Islam, a person can attain a state of perfection
that is close to divinity. Here is a very brief look at some of the
general guidelines that Islam provides for living an ideal life.
The Prophet (May God bless Him and His Descendents) in one of
hissermonsthat have been preserved, said:
"O people! Reach the signs that have been fixed for you and get to the
destinations that have been determined for you. Verily, the believer
strives between two fears: the fear about his past, concerning which
he does not know how God would judge it; and the fear for the future,
concerning which he does not know what God has decreed therein. Let
the believer take from his (transitory) self that which shall benefit
his (abiding) self and from the world that which shall benefit him in
the hereafter. Let him benefit from youth before old age comes upon
him, and from life before death seizes him. By Him in Whose hands is
the life of Mohammad. There is no possibility of penitence after this
world and there is no abode after it save heaven or hell" (Usul
al-Kafi, Hadith 191/1599).
Islam has always stressed upon theimportance of acquiring knowledge.
The book Nahjul Balagha quotes the first Imam Ali ibn Abi Talib (a):
"O' Kumayl, knowledge is better than wealth. Knowledge guards you,
while you have to guard the wealth. Wealth decreases by spending,
while knowledge multiplies by spending, and the results of wealth die
as wealth decays. O' Kumayl, knowledge is belief which is acted upon.
With it man acquires obedience during his life and a good name after
his death. Knowledge is the ruler while wealth is ruled upon."
One of the most important relationships in a person's life is that
between parents and offspring. In an invocation in as-Sahifat
al-Kaamilah, the fourth Imam, Ali ibn al-Husayn (a) sheds light on how
this relationship should be handled:
"O Allah, make me such that I may fear my parents the way one fears a
cruel king, that I may act towards them like a merciful mother. And
let my obedience toward them and my doing good unto them be more
satisfying to me than the sleep of a sleeping person and the quenching
of thirst of a thirsty person, so that I may give priority to their
desires over my own, and their happiness over my own..... Let my voice
be lowered before them, and let my speech be good before them, and let
my nature be soft toward them and let my heart be kind toward them and
let me be their companion..."
What practices should one undertake indealing with the world around
oneself? A part of the answer can be found in the fourth Imam's words:
"O Allah, I beg your forgiveness: for not helping the oppressed who
suffered oppression in my ken; for not offering thanks in return for
some good done unto me; for not accepting the apologies of one who
apologized for doing bad unto me; for refusing to give priority over
my own needs to the needs of one who had petitioned me....."
Abu Basir says: "A man said to Abu Jafar (the fifth Imam, God's
benediction be upon him), 'I am feeble of deeds and my fasts are few.
However, I try to eat nothing but that which is lawful.' The Imam said
to him, 'What endeavor is better than the effort to remain chaste in
respect of one's livelihood and sex relations?'" (Usul al-Kafi,
201/1638). Usul al-Kafi quotes the sixth Imam, Jafar al-Sadiq (a) as
saying: "The noble characteristics are ten. Cultivate them if you can,
for these qualities may be found in a man but not in his children, or
they may be found in the children but not in their father (i.e. they
are not hereditary), or they may be found in a slave and not in a
freeman." "What are they?", he was asked. The Imam said, "They are:
sincerity of indifference (to what is in the hands of people),
truthfulness, trustworthiness, consideration and care of one's
relatives, hospitality, giving food to the beggar, returning the
favors done to one, care for one's neighbor, care for one's companion,
and modesty, at the head of them all." (190/1552).
In conclusion, a point to remember is that according to Islamic
spirit, thefirst and foremost aim of a believerin following the
practices laid down byIslam is to seek Allah's pleasure.
are natural. The Holy Quran says:
"..It is Allah's Nature on which Allah has created humans. There is no
change in Allah's creation. This is the established religion (deen
al-qayyim) but many of the humans know not." (Surat al-Room, Verse
30).
In Islam, thebeliefshave primary position; they are the roots, and
thepracticesare branches that are dependent for their existence on the
roots. The primary belief is that of the Unity and Supreme Sovereignty
of Allah, the Almighty, the Everpresent, the Everlasting, the
All-knowing. Allah is Just. He sent prophets to convey His message. He
selected Imams to safeguard His message. He ordained a Day of
Judgement when the deeds of His creatures will be measured and
rewarded or punished accordingly. Belief in Allah, therefore, entails
belief in all of the above.
Islam is the last divine religion and Prophet Muhammad (s) is the last
Messenger of Allah. In Islam, Allah has encompassed all His
commandments and decrees - decrees that will suffice for humankind til
the end of the world. The commandments are there not only to guide His
creatures to proper belief, but also to show them the proper way to
live their lives. Islam says that its practices are for benefit of the
followers, benefit in this world and in the hereafter.
The ethical and moral degeneration of the western society and the
predominance of suicide, drug abuse, and crime, seem to clearly
indicate that spiritual health of an individual and a community is as
important as physical health. The factors of physical and spiritual
well-being form the basis of Islamic practices. All that is necessary
for a person's spiritual and physical well-being is obligatory, and
all that is harmful is haram (prohibited). Islam shows ways of dealing
with the world around us; the responsibilities of a person to oneself,
to parents, to siblings, to offspring, to spouses, to neighbors, to
society, to nation; what habits to cultivate and what to avoid; what
things to possess and what to give away; what time to sleep and what
time to wake up; when and how to make love and when and how to refrain
from it; when to speak up and when to remain silent; what to eat; how
to eat; how to seek knowledge, etc. In short, Islam teaches values and
priorities concerned with every walk of life.
Islam fulfills all the needs of the human nature in such a way that by
following the path of Islam, a person can attain a state of perfection
that is close to divinity. Here is a very brief look at some of the
general guidelines that Islam provides for living an ideal life.
The Prophet (May God bless Him and His Descendents) in one of
hissermonsthat have been preserved, said:
"O people! Reach the signs that have been fixed for you and get to the
destinations that have been determined for you. Verily, the believer
strives between two fears: the fear about his past, concerning which
he does not know how God would judge it; and the fear for the future,
concerning which he does not know what God has decreed therein. Let
the believer take from his (transitory) self that which shall benefit
his (abiding) self and from the world that which shall benefit him in
the hereafter. Let him benefit from youth before old age comes upon
him, and from life before death seizes him. By Him in Whose hands is
the life of Mohammad. There is no possibility of penitence after this
world and there is no abode after it save heaven or hell" (Usul
al-Kafi, Hadith 191/1599).
Islam has always stressed upon theimportance of acquiring knowledge.
The book Nahjul Balagha quotes the first Imam Ali ibn Abi Talib (a):
"O' Kumayl, knowledge is better than wealth. Knowledge guards you,
while you have to guard the wealth. Wealth decreases by spending,
while knowledge multiplies by spending, and the results of wealth die
as wealth decays. O' Kumayl, knowledge is belief which is acted upon.
With it man acquires obedience during his life and a good name after
his death. Knowledge is the ruler while wealth is ruled upon."
One of the most important relationships in a person's life is that
between parents and offspring. In an invocation in as-Sahifat
al-Kaamilah, the fourth Imam, Ali ibn al-Husayn (a) sheds light on how
this relationship should be handled:
"O Allah, make me such that I may fear my parents the way one fears a
cruel king, that I may act towards them like a merciful mother. And
let my obedience toward them and my doing good unto them be more
satisfying to me than the sleep of a sleeping person and the quenching
of thirst of a thirsty person, so that I may give priority to their
desires over my own, and their happiness over my own..... Let my voice
be lowered before them, and let my speech be good before them, and let
my nature be soft toward them and let my heart be kind toward them and
let me be their companion..."
What practices should one undertake indealing with the world around
oneself? A part of the answer can be found in the fourth Imam's words:
"O Allah, I beg your forgiveness: for not helping the oppressed who
suffered oppression in my ken; for not offering thanks in return for
some good done unto me; for not accepting the apologies of one who
apologized for doing bad unto me; for refusing to give priority over
my own needs to the needs of one who had petitioned me....."
Abu Basir says: "A man said to Abu Jafar (the fifth Imam, God's
benediction be upon him), 'I am feeble of deeds and my fasts are few.
However, I try to eat nothing but that which is lawful.' The Imam said
to him, 'What endeavor is better than the effort to remain chaste in
respect of one's livelihood and sex relations?'" (Usul al-Kafi,
201/1638). Usul al-Kafi quotes the sixth Imam, Jafar al-Sadiq (a) as
saying: "The noble characteristics are ten. Cultivate them if you can,
for these qualities may be found in a man but not in his children, or
they may be found in the children but not in their father (i.e. they
are not hereditary), or they may be found in a slave and not in a
freeman." "What are they?", he was asked. The Imam said, "They are:
sincerity of indifference (to what is in the hands of people),
truthfulness, trustworthiness, consideration and care of one's
relatives, hospitality, giving food to the beggar, returning the
favors done to one, care for one's neighbor, care for one's companion,
and modesty, at the head of them all." (190/1552).
In conclusion, a point to remember is that according to Islamic
spirit, thefirst and foremost aim of a believerin following the
practices laid down byIslam is to seek Allah's pleasure.
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