Fathwa - Permission to observe voluntary fast?

Question:
My wife is really struggling with the idea that why does a woman need
to get her husband's permission to observe voluntary fast? She is
really confused about the fact that this is an act between her and
Allah, why does she need permission from a human being? She has got
some answers from local Imams saying that the man is more inclined
towardsgoing out and committing Zina, so that's why the woman should
be readily available for her husband. This answer really made her
upset, becuase she contested that there are women out there who are as
vulnerable as men. Canyou please provide us a detailed answer, becuase
she is really struggling with this spiritually and physically.
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.
Praise be to Allah.
May Allah's peace and blessings shower upon our beloved Messenger.
Dear Brother,
I pray this message finds you and your wife in good health and spirits.
The basis for a woman's asking her husband's permission to do a
voluntary fast comes from the hadith of the Prophet, Allah bless him
and give him peace, "A woman should not fast (optional fasts) except
with her husband's permission if he is at home (staying with her)."
[Sahih Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 62, Number 120]
Our duty as Muslims is to approach the teachings of the Prophet, peace
be upon him, with the attitude enjoined by the Qur'an, "And it
becomethnot a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and His
messenger have decided an affair (for them), that they should (after
that) claim any say in their affair; and whoso is rebellious to Allah
and His messenger, he verily goeth astray in error manifest."
[Al-Ahzab, 33:36]
The essence of Islam resides in sublimating our inclinations to what
the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, brought us.
Please reassure your wife that her seeking your permission to perform
a voluntary fast is neither demeaning nor degrading to her. Unlike
obligatory fasts, which are an obligation solely due to Allah Most
High, voluntary fasts involve the rights of a fellow human being,
namely the husband. Out of respect and consideration for each other,
both husband andwife should check with each other before performing a
voluntary fast.
My teacher told me that the fundamental purposes of marriage arelove,
intimacy, and companionship. It's hard to satisfy these purposes if
the spouses do not make themselves sexually available to eachother. In
Islam, marriage is a form of contract, based on the premise that the
woman will make herself sexually available to the man with his promise
that he will support her and their children. It is the wife's
religious and legalobligation to make herself available to her
husband. Likewise, it is the husband's religious and legal obligation
to satisfy his wife. Thus, they keep each other chaste.
Your wife is correct: there are some women out there who are inclined
to stray. However, generally speaking, the urge for men to stray is
usually much stronger. The rulings of Sacred Law usually address
themselves to general cases, rather than exceptions.
When a woman gets her husband's consent to perform a voluntary fast,
she can attain to much baraka (blessing) because:
1. She is following the Sunna of our Beloved Prophet, Allah bless him
and give him peace.
2. She is letting her husband know how much she cares about him.
3. She is exemplifying the noble spirit of Islamicmarriage: an
attitude of loving, compassionate concern.
4. When she exhibits such a positive attitude, Allah willing, her
husband will reciprocate.
May Allah Most High blessyou and your wife.
And Allah knows best.

The creation is in need for Allaah

Man always looks for what benefits him and what protects him from
harm. However, to accomplish this, man must be able to realize what is
harmful. He must then know whom he should need, trust, and love so
that he can attain what is beneficial as well as to feel good about
his choice.
He also must know the proper and good approach that would make him
achieve this goal. This latter conditionrequires that man:
1.Know about harm
2.What ways can be used to drive harm away?
Certainly, man can have no better guidance than that which comes from
the One Who had perfected everything, and the One who Has no
deficiency in Himself and in His Attributes. The One Who is
Ever-Living and Who does not die. There can be no One better than the
One Who Has no need for anything; the One Who is rich; the Giver; the
One who, after all, controls man's soul. Man is so poor to Him. He is
Allaah, the True and only God. Man can bring harm to himself if he
seeks other than Allaah for help. Allaah is the OneWho can help man
drive away any harm for it cannot occur without His Will and His
Power.
Allaah Almighty sent down His Books and chose His Messengers to guide man to:
1. Know His Lord as He Almighty had explained about Himself, and
2. Seek Him Alone while living in accordance withHis plan
Knowing Allaah's Names and Attributes liberates man from worshiping
any form of creation because creation is weak and is in need of The
Creator, Allaah. The knowledge about Allaah leads man to know that he
is created to live according to Allaah's wayas revealed to His
Messengers may Allaah exalt their mention the final of whom was
Messenger Muhammad.
This Revelation contains a complete code of life. Everything that is
beneficial or harmful is established so that man can center his life
aroundthis Revelation. If man commits wrong and knows that Allaah is
Oft-Forgiving he would turn to Him, and to Him alone, seeking His
forgiveness; Allaah Says)what means(:"So know, ]O Muhammad sallallaahu
alaihi wa sallam[, that there is no deity except Allah and ask
forgiveness for your sin ."]Quran 47:19[
It is wrong to think or believe that Allaah created other 'gods'
besides Him so that man turns to them for help; loves them or fear
them, etc. He is the same God ofall nations. He does not order that
people should make of stars, sun, fire, 'Eesaa )Jesus(, Moosaa)Moses(,
Muhammad may Allaah exalt their mention etc. gods besides Him. He
)Most Exalted( cannot be 'contradictory'. He has one way )religion(
that calls man to surrender hiswill only to Him.
He warned that if man)even Muhammad( would take partners withHim, then
his work will fail and will be among losers; Allaah Says )what
means(:"And verily, it had beenrevealed to you )O Muhammad ( as has
been revealed to those before you. If you join others in worship with
Allaah )then( surely)all( your deeds will be in vain andyou will
certainly be among the losers. Nay! But worship Allaah and be among
grateful."]Quran 39:65-66[
Let us know what Muhammadthe man-Prophet, who knew Allaah best, used
to say:"OAllaah, I seek refuge in You for Your Pleasure and against
Your Wrath, and in Your Forgiveness and against Your Punishment andin
You from You, I cannot Praise You as You can Praise Yourself.")Muslim,
Abu Daawood, At-Tirmithi, Ibn Maajah(
Heused to say also:"I have surrendered myself to You, Ihave directed
my face to You, I have entrusted my affairs to You, I have compelled
my back to refuge in You, in want and in fright of You, there is no
resort nor survival from You except )in turning( to You. I have faith
in Your book )i.e. the Quran( which You brought down and in the
Prophet )Muhammad ( you have sent.")Al-Bukhaari & Muslim(
When we read in the Quran )what means(:"Whatever of Mercy )i.e. of
good(, Allaah may grant to mankind, none can withhold it, and whatever
He may withhold, none can grant it thereafter. And He is the
All-Mighty, the All-Wise."]Quran 35:2[
And when we read )whatmeans(:"If Allaah touches you with hurt, there
is none can remove it but He; and if He intends any good for you,
there isnone who can repel His favor which He causes it to reach
whomsoever of His slaves He will,and He is the Oft-Forgiving, Most
Merciful."]Quran 10:117[
We should be motivated to return to Him Alone at times of ease and at
times of hardship. And when we read )what means(:"If Allaah helps you
none can overcome you, and if Heforsakes you, who is there, after Him,
that can help you. And in Allaah )alone( let believers put their
trust."]Quran 3:160[
The Quran, therefore, leads man to a true liberation from any false
attachment. It brings peace to the heart. It helps the believer
againsthypocrisy and all forms ofdishonesty.
Imagine, for example, a believer facing a problemat work. He sees
wrong and faces unlawful practices. He does not fear rejecting what is
wrong. He knows that the job is only a means togain his sustenance.
While he may be unable to correct what is wrong,he knows well that
Allaahis the One Who provides. If he leaves his job for the sake of
Allaah, Allaah will give him a better one. Allaah Almighty Said)what
means(:"And whoever fears Allah—He will make for him a way out. And
will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies
upon Allah — then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will
accomplish His purpose. Allah hasalready set for everything a]decreed[
extent."]Quran 65:2-3[
The above texts, necessitates that man must depend upon AllaahAlmighty
asking Him Alone for assistance. It also requires that man must love
Allaah and worship Him Alone to gain His pleasure and His help. Is it
not true that the people who consider this life as the "Final Goal"
end up worshiping many things in it? You see them so careful
about"having it all". They torture themselves: pain, difficulty,
constant worry,keeping their hands in the banks for loan after loan to
keep up with the"demands of development". They are under the constant
threatof fore-closure. They constantly see poverty in front of their
eyes.
The Prophetsaid:"Allaah says: 'Son of Aadam: Fill your time with My
worship and I will fill your heart with richness, and end off your
poverty. But if you do not, I would make your hands fully busy )i.e.
in worldly affairs( and I would not end off your
poverty.'")At-Tirmithi(
Our purpose of existence on earth is more meaningful than being slaves
to worldly gains. There can be no meaningful life better than that
prescribed by our Creator Allaah. Every act done according to Allaah's
way is an act of worship. Man is the beneficiary and Allaah is in no
need; Allaah Says)what means(::"O mankind! It is you who stand in need
of Allaah, but Allaah is Rich )Free of all wants and needs(, Worthy of
All Praise."]Quran 35:15[

'Aa'ishah: the mother of the believers

When the Prophetemigrated from Makkah to Al-Madeenah he was
accompanied by Abu Bakr)'Aa'ishah's father( who had the most knowledge
about the Quraysh -- both the good and badaspects. He was a well-known
honorable merchant to whom people came to seek and gain more
knowledge.
'Aa'ishah's motherwas called Umm Rummaan bint 'Umayr bin 'Amer coming
from the sons of Al-Haarith bin Ghanam bin Ka'ab, and she was among
the first group who embraced Islam. She had been married to 'Abdullaah
bin 'Abdul-Asad before she married Abu Bakr, and she had a son from
her first husband called At-Tufayl, and she gave birth to 'Aa'ishah
and 'Abdur-Rahmaan from Abu Bakr. She emigrated to Al-Madeenah after
the establishment of Islam there. When she died, Abu Bakrsaid: "O
Allaah! You know best how Umm Rummaan was hurt for Your sake and the
sake of Your Prophet."
The Prophetused to entrust 'Aa'ishahto Umm Rummaan's charge and say:"O
Umm Rummaan, be kind to 'Aa'ishah and be mindful of me by this
kindness."
In fact, the Prophetused to love the clean and pure household of Abu
Bakrbecause the man of the house -- Abu Bakr -- was a man who needed
no introduction; his character and lineage were not something to
inquire about.
The Messenger of Allaahthought about proposing to 'Aa'ishahfor
marriage when Khawlah bint Haakim Al-Aslamiahsaid to him: "What do you
say about marrying 'Aa'ishah the daughter of Abu Bakr?"; he,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wasallam then moved his head in the affirmative,
saying yes. Then Khawlah went to Umm Rummaan to tell her the news and
said: "O Umm Rummaan, youcannot imagine how Allaah has blessed your
house!"
Khawlahsaid: "The Messenger of Allaahsent me to seek 'Aa'ishah for
marriage." Umm Rummaansaid: "Wait for Abu Bakr, he is coming soon."
When Abu Bakrcame back, Khawlah told him the news and he said: "Is she
suitable for him? She is his niece." Khawlah then went back to the
Prophetandtold him what Abu Bakr had told her, and hesaid: "Go back
and tell Abu Bakr that he is my brother in Islam and I am his, and his
daughter is good enough for me."
Abu Bakr thought deeply about this and then went to Mut'am bin'Uday,
who had proposed 'Aa'ishahfor marriage to his son Jubayr. These people
were still disbelievers. When Abu Bakrentered their house, they said:
"O son of Abu Quhaafah, we fear that if our son married your daughter
'Aa'ishah, then she would convince him of Islam and we do not want
this to happen."
Abu Bakrdid not answer, buton the contrary he was very pleased with
that. In this way he was freed of their promise and he could give his
full agreement for the blessed marriage.
'Aa'ishahnarrated how she became married to the Messenger of Allaah,
sallallaahu ''alayhi wa sallam, and said: "The Prophetcame to our
house, and many people gathered there to meet him. Then my mother came
to me while I was playing, she took me to the door where the
Prophetwas sitting. I wasso embarrassed and I melted in shyness. Then
my mother put mebeside the Prophetand said: "This is your wife, may
Allaah bless her for you, and bless you for her." People then left the
room, and at that night nothing was slaughtered for me and I was nine
years old at that time." Although she was young, she was a mature girl
who had reached puberty. People described 'Aa'ishah on her wedding day
and said: "She was animble, wide-eyed bride, with curly hair and a
shiny face."
Whereas Khadeejahwas already a wise and mature woman when she married
the Prophet Muhammad'Aa'ishahwas a spirited young girl who still had a
great deal to learnwhen she married the Prophet. However, she was very
quickto learn, for she had a clear heart,a quick mind and an accurate
memory. She was not afraid to talk back in order to find out the truth
or make it known, and whenever she beat someone else in argument, the
Prophetwould smile and say: "She is the daughter of Abu Bakr!"
Moosaa bin Talhahonce said: "I have not seen anyone more eloquent than
'Aa'ishah." 'Aa'ishahbecame so wise that one of her contemporaries
used to say that if the knowledgeof 'Aa'ishah were placed on one side
of the scales and that of all other women on the other, 'Aa'ishah's
side would outweigh the others. She used to sit with the other women
and pass on the knowledge that she had received from the Prophet. She
was a source of knowledge and wisdom for both women andmen long after
the Prophetdied and as long as she lived. AbuMoosaaonce said:
"Whenevera report appeared doubtful to us)the Companions of the
Prophet( and we asked 'Aa'ishah about it, we always learned something
from her about it."
In addition to being extremely intelligent, 'Aa'ishahbecame a very
graceful young woman. When she first came to live in theProphet's
household as a young girl, a strong and lasting friendship grew up
between her and Sawdah, and Sawdahtook care of her along with the rest
of the household. When 'Aa'ishahgrew up, Sawdah, who was by then an
old woman, gave up her share of the Prophet's time in favor of
'Aa'ishah and was content to manage his household and be Umm al
Mu'mineen 'The Mother of the Believers' -- a title of respect that
was given to all the wives of the Prophetwhich confirmed what the
Quran clearlystates that no man could marry any of them after they had
been married to the Prophet:
}The Prophet is more worthy of the believers than themselves, and his
wives are )in the position of( their mothers.{]Quran 33:6[
During the nine years that 'Aa'ishahwas married to Prophet Muhammadshe
witnessed many of the great events that shaped the destiny ofthe first
Muslim community of Al-Madeenah al Munawarra: It was during the course
of their marriage that the direction of theQiblah was changed from
Jerusalem to Makkah, thereby distinguishing the Muslims more clearly
from Jews and Christians. It was during the course of their marriage
that she must have listened to many of the Jews, Christians and idol
worshippers who came not to listen to the Prophetbut to argue with
him, in the hope that they could find a plausible excuse to justify
their rejection of him. It was through exchanges such as thesethat
'Aa'ishahlearned to distinguish what was true from what was false.
As the prophetic guidance continued to be revealed throughthe Prophet
Muhammad, sallallaahu ''alayhi wa sallam, 'Aa'ishah's way of life,
along withthat of all the Muslims, was gradually reshaped and refined.
Itwas during the course of their marriage that drinking alcohol was
finally forbidden, it was made clear what food was allowed )Halaal(
and what was prohibited )Haraam(, it became necessary for women to
wear theHijaab in public and while praying, guidance regarding how to
fast was revealed, paying the Zakaat became obligatory on all Muslims
and all rites of Hajj were purified and clarified.
In fact, every aspect of life -- frombirth to death and everything
that happens in between -- was illuminated by the way in which the
Prophetbehaved. It was this way of behavior )the Sunnah(, that
'Aa'ishahhelped to preserve and protect, not only by embodying it
herself, but also by teaching it to others.
The life of 'Aa'ishahis proof that a woman can be far more learned
than men and that she can be the teacher of scholars and experts. Her
life is also a proof that a woman can exert influence over men and
women and provide them with inspiration and leadership . Her life is
also proof that the same woman can retain her feminity and be a source
of pleasure, joy and comfort to her husband.
'Aa'ishahspent her life with the Prophetuntil he died in her lap,
whereupon she said: "Hedied between my chest and my neck, then I put
his head on a pillow when people became very quiet while I was
mourning and suffering deep sadness."

The principles of Ghusl)taking bath(

A brief summary of the principles of Ghuslis as follows:
First,A Muslim should make his/her intention for purification, then
wash the privateparts. Then make Wudhoo' )ablution( like theWudhoo'
done for prayer, then pour water on hisright side, then the left side.
Then water should be poured on his head,covering the entire body with
water. It is also reported in the Sunnah)narrations of the Prophet
Muhammad( that washing the feet should be delayed until the end of the
Ghusl.
It is reported onthe authority of Aa'ishahwho said that theMessenger
of Allaahwhen performingGhusl from Janaabah)ritual impurity(, used to
wash hishands, then wash his private parts with hisleft hand. After
that he performed Wudhoo' like that for prayer. Next, he took
somewater and ran his fingers inthe roots of his hair until he
usedthree handfulsof water on his head. He would then go on pouring
water on the rest of his bodyand wash his legs. ]Muslim[
1. The person taking a bath should first of all wash both hands up to
the wrists, and then wash the private parts. The hands and private
parts should be washed irrespective of whether there is any impurity
on them or not. Both these have to be washed under all conditions.
Thereafter, any impurity found onthe rest of the body should be
washed. Then make Wudhoo'. If one is sitting on a stool or stone while
bathing, then the feet should also be washed when making Wudhoo'. But
if one is sitting in a place where the wateraccumulates and he will
have to wash the feet again after completing the Ghusl, then the
entire Wudhoo' should be made but the feet should not be washed.
After performing Wudhoo', pour water on the head three times.
Thereafter pour water over the right and left shoulders three times
each in such a way that water reaches the entire body. Thereafter move
from this place and go to a clean spot and wash the feet. If the feet
were washed when making Wudhoo' there willbe no need to wash them
again.
2. Whilst pouring water over the body the first time, rub the body
well so that water reaches everywhere properly and no placeremains
dry.
3. The above method of Ghusl is according to the Sunnah. Some ofthe
items explained above are Fardh )obligatory( without which Ghusl will
not be complete and the person will remain impure. Some other items
are Sunnah)recommended but not obligatory(. Observing them entails
reward, and by not carrying them out, Ghusl will still be complete.
The Fardh acts are only three:
)a( To gargle the mouth in such a way that water reaches everywhere.
)b( To wash the nose up to the soft bone.
)c( To pour water over the entire body.
4. While bathing, one should not face the Qiblah )direction of the
Ka'bah(. Too much water should not be used, nor should so little be
used that one is unable to wash thoroughly. The bath should be taken
at such a place that no one can see the bather. One should not talk
while bathing; he should cover himself up first and then wash the
feet.
5. If the bathing place is secludedwhere no one can see, then it is
permissible to bathe naked, irrespective of whether one is standing or
sitting and irrespective of whether the roof is covered or not.
However, it is better to sit and bathe because there is more modesty
in this. To expose the body from the navel to the knees before anyone
is a sin. Many women bath completely naked in the presenceof other
women. This is a very evil and shameful act.
6. Even if an area equal to a hair's breadth is left dry, Ghusl will
not be complete. In the same way, if one forgets to gargle the mouth
or wash the nose, Ghusl will not be complete.
7. If a woman pours water on herhead three times, that will be
sufficient and she does not need to undo the braids. This is based on
the Hadeeth )narration( ofUmm Salamah. It is narratedthat she asked
the Prophet:"I am a woman with braided hair;should I undo it when
doing Ghusl for Janaabah?" Heanswered:"No, rather it will be
sufficient for you to pour three handfuls of water on your head, then
pour water over yourself and you will be purified."]Muslim[.Unless the
Ghusl is after the menses, then she has to undo the braids and wash
her hair thoroughly.