The rights of the wife upon her husband

Financial rights
The wife is naturally entitled for food, clothing, housing and
otherrelated items with expenses to be born by the husband. This
natural right has been given by Allaah Almighty to the wife basedon
the following verse from the Glorious Quran )which means(:"Mothers may
breastfeed their children two complete years for whoever wishes to
complete the nursing ]period[. Upon the father is the mothers'
provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable. No
person is charged with more than his capacity..."]Quran 2: 233[
1. The Mahr )dowry(:This is the money to which the wife is entitled
from her husband when the marriage contract is completed or when the
marriage is consummated. It is a right which the man is obliged to pay
to the woman. Allaah Almighty Says )what means(:"And give the women
]upon marriage[ their]bridal[ gifts graciously. But if they give up
willingly to you anything of it, then take it in satisfaction and
ease."]Quran 4: 4
2. Spending:It is obligatory for husbands to spend on their wives, on
the condition that the wife makes herself available to her husband. If
she refuses him or rebels, then she is not entitled to that spending.
What is meant by spending is providing what the wife needs of food and
accommodation. She has the right to these things evenif she is rich,
because Allaah Says)what means(:"…Upon the father is the mothers'
provision and their clothing according to what is acceptable…"]Quran
2: 233[
And )what means(:"Let a man of wealth spend from his wealth, and he
whose provision is restricted – let him spend from what Allaah has
given him…"]Quran 65: 7[
It was narrated that 'Aa'ishahsaid: "Hind Bint )the daughter of(
'Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyaan, entered upon the Messenger of
Allaahand said: 'O Messenger of Allaah, Abu Sufyaan is a stingy man
who doesnot spend enough on me and my children, except for what I take
from his wealth without his knowledge. Is there any sin on me for
doing that?' The Messenger of Allaahsaid:'Take from his wealth on a
reasonable basis, only what is sufficient for you and your children.'"
]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
It was narrated from Jaabirthat Allaah's Messengersaid in his Farewell
Sermon:"Fear Allaah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on
the security of Allaah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful
unto you by words of Allaah. You too have rights over them, and that
they should not allow anyone to sit on your bedding ]i.e., not let
them into the house[ whom you do not like.But if they do that, you can
chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you
should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting
manner."]Muslim[
Also, the Prophetwas once asked: "What is the right of the wife unto
her husband?" Hesaid:"She is entitled for the samefood you eat, offer
her clothing whenever you buy yourself clothes, do not hit her on the
face, do not insult her and do notabandon her unless you do so)i.e.
abandon her( in the same house )under the same roof(."]Abu Daawood,
Ahmad and Ibn Maajah[
3. Accommodation:This is also one of the wife's rights, which means
that her husband should prepare for her accommodation according to his
means and ability. Allaah Almighty Says)what means(:"Lodge them ]in a
section[ of where you dwell out of your means and do not harm them in
order to oppress them…"]Quran 65: 6[
Non-financial rights
1. Fair treatment of co-wives:Oneof the rights that a wife has over
her husband is that she and her co-wives should be treated equally, if
the husband has other wives, with regard to nights spent with them,
spending and clothing.
In case of multiple wives, the husband must be fair and just to all of
them, treat them fairly in terms of expenditure, housing, time and all
other items of whichthe husband is capable. Being biased or even
inclined and preferring one wife over the other is considered one of
the major sins.
Allaah's Messengersaid:"If a man was married to two wives and is
inclined to one of them)and favored her over the other(, he will come
on the Day of Judgment with one side of his body tilted )as a
punishment for his unjust treatment(."]Imaam Ahmad[
Man, as the husband, however will not be held responsible or
accountable for things that he has no control over, such as love,
affection and self-comfort. Allaah,the Almighty stated in the Glorious
Quran )what means(:"And you will never be able to be equal ]in
feeling[ between wives, even if you should strive ]to do so[. So do
not incline completely]toward one[ and leave another hanging. And if
you amend ]your affairs[ and fear Allaah – then indeed, Allaah is ever
Forgiving and Merciful."]Quran 4: 129[
However, if a husband preferred one wife over another in terms
ofspending the night with, based on the approval and acceptance of the
other wife, then, in such a case, there is no harm. That was the case
with 'Aa'ishah and Sawdah, two of the Prophet's wiveswhen Sawdahagreed
to grant her night to 'Aa'ishahtoward the end of the life of the
Prophet.
Yet, when the Prophetbecame very ill, hecontinuously asked:"Where
shall be tomorrow )i.e., in whose house(?"All his wives agreed to let
him stay at the house of 'Aa'ishahwhere hewanted to be until his
death.]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
2. Kind treatment:The husband must have a good attitude towards his
wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything thatmay soften her
heart towards him, because Allaah Says )what means(:"…And live with
them in kindness…"]Quran 4: 19[
Also Allaah Says )what means(:"…And due to the wives is similar to
what is expected of them, according to what is reasonable..."]Quran 2:
228[
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrahsaid: "The Messenger of
Allaahsaid:'Be kind to women.'"]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
Here are some examples from theProphet:
It was narrated from Zaynab Bint)the daughter of( Abi Salamah that Umm
Salamahsaid: "I got my menses when I was lying with the Prophetunder a
single woolen sheet. I slipped away and put on the clothes I usually
wore for menstruation. The Messenger of Allaahsaid to me:'Have you got
your menses?'I said, 'Yes.' Then he, salallaahu alayhi wa sallam,
called me and made me lie with him under the same
sheet..."]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
It was narrated that 'Urwah Ibn Al-Zubayr said: "Aa'ishahsaid: 'By
Allaah, I saw the Messenger of Allaahstanding at the door of my
apartment when the Abyssinians were playing with their spears in the
Mosque of the Messenger of Allaah. He covered me with his cloak so
that I could watch their games, then he stood there for my sake until
I was the one who had had enough...'"]Al-Bukhaari and Muslim[
It was narrated from 'Aa'ishahthat the Messenger of Allaahused to pray
sitting down; hewould recite Quran when he was sitting down, then when
there were thirty or forty verses left, hewould stand up and recite
them standing up. Then hedid Rukoo' )bowing(, then Sujood
)prostration(; then hewould do likewise in the second Rak'ah )unit of
prayer(. When hehad finished his prayer, hewould look, and if I was
awake hewould talk with me, and if I was asleep hewould lie down.
]Al-Bukhaari[
3. Not harming one's wife:This is one of the basic principles of
Islam. Because harming others is forbidden in the case of strangers,
it is even more so in the case of harming one's wife.
It was narrated from 'Ubaadah Ibn As-Saamitthat the Messenger of
Allaahruled:"There should be no harming norreciprocating harm."]Ibn
Maajah[
Among the things to which the Lawgiver )Allaah Almighty( drew
attention in this matter is the prohibition of hitting or beating in a
severe manner.
It was narrated from Jaabirthat the Messenger of Allaahsaid in his
Farewell Sermon:"…But if they do that, you can chastise them but not
severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with
food and clothing in a fitting manner.")part of the above-mentioned
hadeeth( ]Muslim[

Why do we delay repentance?

Repentance is ultimately the goal that we all seek. All sane people
are conscious of their numerous sins, and thosewho believe in Allaah
and His Messengerrecognize that they will be held accountable for
their sins, and therefore desire to be free of the evil consequences
of their misdeeds. Islam offers man the ideal way by which he may be
released from the burdenof his sins.
The word Tawbah)repentance( in Arabic literally means 'to return'.In
an Islamic context, it refers to the act of leaving what Allaah has
prohibited and returningto what He, Almighty, hascommanded.
The subject of repentance is one that concerns all people who believe
in Allaah, and is vital for the Muslims to understand because our
salvation in the Hereafterdepends on our repentance to Allaah, as
Allaah commands )what means(:"…And turn to Allaah in repentance, all
of you, that youmight succeed."]Quran 24:31[
Allaah also Says )what means(:"…Indeed, Allaah loves those who are
constantly repentant and loves those who purify themselves."]Quran
2:222[
One may have a real intention to repent, but there may be some
obstacles to the path of repentance. If this is the case, then he
needs to actwithout hesitation and remove those obstacles to clear the
way to a happy soul.
The postponement of repentance may be the result of either a
deliberate desire to prolong the illicit pleasure derived from the
sin, or doubt on the part of an ignorant sinner whether or not Allaah
would accept his repentance.
However, we have to be certain that Allaah will guide us to success
and safeguard us against our malice. We also must be confident that
Allaah forgives our sins and thatHe, and only He, can judge us. It is
only His Judgement that is worthyof our worry and anxiety.So we should
fear Him only because sincere repentance removes all sins and
disobedience.
The door of repentance is always open, until...
The door to repentance isalways open and will not be closed in the
face of any repentant person, regardless of his sins. Expect this gate
to have two locks: death and the approach of the Day of Judgement. The
first was mentioned in the Hadeeth:"Allaah accepts a slave's
repentance unless his death approaches."]At-Tirmithi[
The other was mentionedin the Hadeeth:"Whosoever turns to Allaah in
repentance before the sun rises in the West, Allaah will forgive
him."]Ahmad[
Allaah Says in the Quran what means:"But repentanceis not ]accepted[
of those who]continue to[ do evil deeds up until, when death comes to
one of them, he says: 'Indeed, I have repented now,' or of those who
die while they are disbelievers..."]Quran 4:18[
O heedless soul! Hasten torepent before the knock of death sounds and
the time of repentance runs out. Do not get caught dying in a state of
disobedience to your Most Merciful Lord. Satan gives you long hope and
empty promises; he delays your repentance until your heart becomes as
callous as a rock by being adamant in sin anddisobedience, and you
would therefore meet your Lord in a wretched state. If the door of
repentance is closed to you, it will never open to you again.
What keeps us from repenting?
1. Taking sins lightly:
The problem with many of us today is that we do not fear Allaah, which
means that we do not think seriously about disobeying Him and
therefore fall into sin, without giving any real thought to it. Hence,
we should think about the statement which Ibn Mas'oodmade:"A believer
sees his sins as if he were sitting under a mountain which he is
afraid may collapse on him, whereas the wicked person considers his
sins as flies passing over his nose which he just drives away like
this )and he waved his hand across his face toillustrate
this(."]Al-Bukhaari[
The Prophetsaid:"Take caution against minor sins, because such sins
are like a group of people who temporarilysettled in the middle of a
valley. Then, they decided to make a fire,so each one of them brought
a stick until they were able to make it, so they baked their bread.
Thus, minor sins )when they accumulate( may destroy the one who
commits them."]Ahmad[
2. "What is the point? I will only end up doing it again"
Such an approach is the result of a misunderstanding. Indeed, one of
the conditions of repentance is having a real intention not to return
to the same sin. This, however, does not mean that Satan will never
tempt you to commit the same sin again. Thus, if you have failed
yourself, and you returned to the same sin, it does not mean that your
first repentance wasa lie. You should hasten to make additional
repentance, with a real intention not to return tothis sin, keeping in
mind that Allaah's mercy extends over everything.
3. "Allaah is forgiving, so let me sin"
When reminded of repentance and the hideousness of disobedience, some
people would respond that Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. An
atheist once said in sarcasm: "You should commit as many sins as you
can because you are heading towardsthe Lord who is Most-Generous."
There is no doubt that such a view is complete ignorance of the
religion of Allaah, because Allaah's mercy is close to the righteous
and not to the wrongdoers.
4. "I am destined to be a sinner"
Some people may chooseto blame Al-Qadr )fate( for their sins. For
example, if you ask any of them, "Why do you notperform the Prayers?
Why do you not fast? Why do you drink or smoke? Why do you not repent
from your disobedience?" They would respond by saying:"This is
Allaah's Qadr" or:"I am doomed to do this."This is definitely a grave
misconception and an evasion of the truth. Believing in Al-Qadr does
not mean that one is destined to commit sins. It is true that Allaah
has written all human beings'deeds, good or bad, and only He knows the
unseen, but the believer is not forced to perform agood deed, nor is
he forced to commit any disobedience. Instead, hehas been granted the
ability to reflect, reason and then make a decisionfreely. Al-Qadr is
only responsible for the calamities and blessings that an individual
may confront because he can do nothing about them. For example, if a
couple were to marry and have three children, then this is their Qadr.
It is impermissible to fault Al-Qadr for our sins and disobedience
because doing so is akin to being in confrontation and showing
dissatisfaction with Allaah.
Repentance wipes out all sins, major and minor:
Being confused, some people may think that repentance is only required
for major sins. Itshould be noted that repentance from all sins is
obligatory.
Even the Prophetwho was sinless, asked Allaah to forgive him on a
daily basis. The Prophetis reported to have said:"O people! Make
repentance to Allaah. I swear by Allaah that I make repentance to Him
more than seventy times every day."]Al-Bukhaari[
Therefore, we all need to fear Allaah, ask His forgiveness and be
aware that there is no sinthat is minor with persistence, and no major
sin with seeking Allaah's forgiveness )i.e. if the minor sin is
repeated many times it becomes a major one.( Thus, sincere repentance
wipes out all committed sins.
Never despair!
Someone might say:"I want to repent but my sins are too many."But
Allaah Says what means:"Say: 'O my slaves who have transgressed
against themselves ]by sinning[, do not despair of the mercy of
Allaah. Indeed, Allaah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the
Forgiving, the Merciful."]Quran 39:53[
Therefore, we should never lose hope or stop asking for Allaah's
forgiveness. Its importance is shown to us in the Hadeeth in which the
Prophetsaid:"O people! Turn to Allaah inrepentance and seek His
forgiveness, for I make repentance to Him a hundred times every
day."]Muslim[
Repentance is such a great act of worship that doing it can erase all
our sins altogether, as the Prophetsaid:"One who repents from sin is
like one without sin."]Ibn Maajah[

Fathwa, - What a loving muslim wife should do when herhusband shakes hands with non-muslim women?

Question:
What a loving Muslim wife should do when her husband shakes hands with
non-Muslim women ?
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most MercifulDear Sister,
Assalamu alaikum,
The solution is clear. Explain to your husband that it is not
permissible to shake hands with unrelated members of the opposite sex.
If he fears embarrassment, then offer to shake the women's hands for
him. And explain to the women in a nice way that Muslim culture does
not permit men and women, who are not related, to shake hands.
Nevertheless, if your husband persists, then leave this between him
and Allah. He may have to figure out this issue for himself.
Just advise him to be cautious and fear Allah inhis dealings, and then
goon with your life.
And Allah knows best.

Fathwa, - sexual enhancement with wife...

Question:
I have a question to which I hope to get an answer from you. I was
wondering if it is permissible for a man to take a 100% naturalherbal
medicine to enhance one's sexual relationship with one's wife and
which also lengthens the sizeof a mans penis duringerection. It is
simply tohave a healthier sexualrelationship and to satisfy each
others needs. As we all know there are many other available natural
products allowed in Islam to fulfill this need. It is also said that
black seed oil and honey are beneficent to a healthy sexual
relationship. And Viagra is also permissible despite it having many
chemicals in it (It is also said that it lengthens a mans penis and
widens it). So my question is...Is itpermissible in Islam totake a
100% safe natural herbal medicine to obtain a longer and better sexual
relationship with one's wife and to lengthen the penis in size for the
purpose of satisfying each other? Iwould deeply appreciate an answer
brother.
Answer:
In the name of Allah MostMerciful Most Compassionate
I pray you are well and in the best of health and iman.
If there is no harm in taking the medicine, then it is permissible.
Butone should keep in mind that today sex has become an obsession and
a goal in itself, in Islam sex is a means for children and
satisfaction for both husband and wife and not a sport.
And Allah alone gives success.