10 Choices You Will Regret in 10 Years

These two words paired together create one of the saddestphrases in
the English language.
Here are ten choices that ultimately lead to this phrase of regret,
and how to elude them:
1. Wearing a mask to impress others. – If the face you always show the
world is a mask, someday there will be nothing beneath it. Because
when you spend too much time concentrating on everyone else's
perception of you, or who everyone else wants you to be, you
eventually forget who you really are. So don'tfear the judgments of
others; you know in your heart who you areand what's true to you. You
don't have to be perfect to impress and inspire people . Let them be
impressed andinspired by how you deal with your imperfections.
2. Letting someone else create your dreams for you. – The greatest
challenge in life is discovering who you are; the second greatest is
being happywith what you find. A big part of this is your decision to
stay true to your own goals and dreams. Do you have people who
disagree with you? Good. It means you're standing your ground and
walking your own path. Sometimes you'll do things considered crazy by
others, but when you catch yourself excitedly losing track of time,
that's when you'll know you're doing the right thing. Read The 4-Hour
Workweek .
3. Keeping negative company. – Don't let someone who has a bad
attitude give it to you. Don't let them get to you. They can't pull
the trigger if you don't hand them the gun. When you remember that
keeping the company of negative people is a choice, instead of an
obligation, you free yourself to keep the company of compassion
instead of anger, generosity instead of greed, and patience instead of
anxiety.
4. Being selfish and egotistical. – A life filledwith loving deeds and
good character is the best tombstone. Those who you inspired and
shared your love with will remember how you made them feel long after
your time has expired. So carve your name on hearts , not stone.
What you have done for yourself alone dies with you; what you have
done for others and the world remains.
5. Avoiding change and growth. – If you want to know your past look
into your present conditions. If you wantto know your future look
into your present actions. You must let go of the old to make way for
the new; the old way is gone, never to come back. If you acknowledge
this right now and take steps to address it, you will position
yourself for lasting success. The Power of Habit .
6. Giving up when the going gets tough. – There are no failures, just
results. Even if things don't unfold the way you had expected, don't
be disheartened or give up. Learn what you can and move on. The one
who continuesto advance one step at a time will win in the end.
Because the battleis always won far away and long before the final
victory. It's a process that occurs with small steps, decisions, and
actions that gradually build upon each other and eventually lead to
that glorious moment of triumph.
7. Trying to micromanageevery little thing. – Life should be touched,
not strangled. Sometimes you've got to relax and let life happen
without incessant worry and micromanagement. Learn to let go a little
before you squeeze tootight. Take a deep breath. When the dust
settles and you can once again see the forest for the trees, take the
next step forward. You don't have to know exactly where you're going
to be headed somewhere great. Everything in life is in perfect order
whether you understand it yet or not. It just takes some time to
connect all the dots.
8. Settling for less than you deserve. – Be strong enough to let goand
wise enough to wait for what you deserve. Sometimes you have to get
knocked down lower than you have ever been to stand up taller than you
ever were before. Sometimes your eyes need to be washed by your tears
so you can see the possibilities in front of you with a clearer vision
again. Don't settle.
9. Endlessly waiting until tomorrow. – The trouble is, you always
think you have more time than you do. But one day you will wake up
and there won't be any more time to work on the things you've always
wanted to do. And at that point you either will have achieved the
goals you set for yourself, or you will have a list of excuses for why
you haven't. Read The Last Lecture .
10. Being lazy and wishy-washy. – The world doesn't owe you anything,
you owe theworld something. So stop daydreaming andstart DOING.
Develop abackbone, not a wishbone. Take full responsibility for
yourlife – take control. You are important andyou are needed. It's
too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday.
Someday is now; the somebody the world needs is YOU .
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8 Dangerous Things We Teach Each Other

and menacing lessons society teaches. To truly thrive in this world
you're going to have to unlearn and disregard some of the ludicrous
advice people reflexively pass along to each other.
Here are eight dangerouspieces of advice you may have learned:
1. There is a clear paththat everyone should follow.
Your greatest fear shouldnot be of failure, but of succeeding in life
at all the wrong things.
Choose a path that fits YOU. Those who follow the crowd usually get
lostin it. Challenge yourself to ask with each and every step, each
focus point that consumes yourenergy: "Does this thing I'm doing right
now serve me and those I careabout in the next few minutes, few
months, and few years?"
Whatever you settle on, just make sure you don't gain the whole world
by losing your soul and purpose in the process. Read The Untethered
Soul .
2. Success is a particular outcome or object that can be acquired.
Success is a consistent pattern of behavior moreso than it is an
isolated event. It is the way you live rather than some object or
outcome you acquire. Success is yours when you persistently embody
the discipline, integrity, attitude, and other attributes from which
it is derived.
It is a mindset within you. If you consider success to be something
outside of you, that's where it will always remain – somewhere else.
So in your thoughts, your words, your actions and your expectations,
be the living embodiment of success, and whatever you touch will have
the potential to be successfultoo.
3. You need more to be happy.
You are doing just fine. You don't need any moreor any less to be happy.
Life would be so different if you stopped allowing other people to
dilute or poison your perception with their words and opinions.
Happiness is derived from the way you see your own life; it depends on
your thoughts, not on what you have or what you do not have, or
whatother people think aboutwhat you have. Read The How of Happiness .
4. Rejection and criticism stifle growth.
No matter how good youare at something there will always be people who
criticize your efforts. And while it's never a comfortable
experience, the feelings of criticism and rejection can actually help
you access your more creative self. Free from the expectations of
maintaining a status-quothat everyone is pleased with, you can push
the limits of innovation and self expression.
5. The future is what matters most.
Right now you are alive. This moment is your life. Today is too
valuable to waste thinking of another time and place.
Your friends and family are too beautiful to ignore. Take a moment to
remember how fortunate you are to be breathing. Take a look around,
with your eyes earnestly open to the possibilities before you. Much
of what you fear does not exist. Much of what you love is closer than
you realize. You arejust one brief thought away from understanding
the blessing that is your life.
6. Big opportunities only come to a lucky few.
Big opportunities come to those who make the most of little
opportunities. Little opportunities are present in each moment and in
every situation.
Today is filled with little opportunities. Everywhere you look, there
are small ways for you to make a positive difference. In little bits
of time that might otherwise be wasted, there is a piece of something
larger waitingto be created. String enough of these pieces together,
and absolutely anything is within your reach. You just need to decide
what it is you want to achieve. Read Secrets of the Millionaire Mind .
7. All relationships should be held on to and nurtured.
Most people come into your life temporarily simply to teach you
something. They come and they go and they make a difference. And
it's okay that they're not in your life anymore.
Not all relationships last, but the lessons these relationships bring
to you do. If you learn to open your heart and mind, anyone,
including the folks who eventually drive you crazy, can teach you
something worthwhile.
Sometimes it will feel weird when you realize you spent so much time
with someone you are nolonger connected to, but that's exactly how
it's supposed to be. You are exactly where you're supposed to be. We
all are.
8. The past is indicative of the future.
The mindset of your past being indicative of your future is hogwash.
Do not judge your failed attempts and mistakes as an indication of
your future potential, but as part of your growth process. Your past
has given you the strength and wisdom you have today, so celebrate it
anduse the knowledge you've gained. Don't let it haunt you and hold
you back.
Quite often, the successful people who act the happiest are the ones
who have overcomethe most. Sometimes youhave to lose something
precious in order to gain something priceless. So if you hit rock
bottom, just think, you've got nothing to lose, everything to gain,
and asolid foundation withoutexpectations or obligations from which to
rebuild your life

Her husband's desire of divorce is based on false accusations

Assalamu-alikum, married, has 2 kids, my husband accused me of I am
willing to harm him by putting some kind of shyton deeds, such as
poison him with shyton deeds. I never done any of these things he
accused me with and never willing to do, because it is shrike. I
lovemy Allah more than him and I love my Hakira (here after,) may
Allah grated me with his Janna/Haven, that is my only wish. Now he is
willing todivorce me and he already said once "I divorce you" with
something I never done. My question is I still love him and still
willing to keep our marriage for the sake of our little children. I
try to convincehim that I never comment in such sin, but still he is
not willing to accept or believe me. Even though, I have not done such
sin, I don't want him to divorce me because of this reason and I don't
want him to accuse me with it too, because it hurt me so much. Please
give me an advice on what decision Ishould take. Accept his wish or
stay fight for our marriage and make dua for me please, thank you
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad
, is His Slave and Messenger.
It is Islamically established that in principle a Muslim is innocent
of any accusations, and it is an obligation to think good of him
unless the contrary is proven against him. Allaah Says (what means): {
O you who have believed, avoidmuch [negative] assumption. Indeed, some
assumption is sin. } [Quran 49:12] For more benefit, please refer to
Fataawa 92038 and 128834 .
Therefore, if your husband accuses you of something which you
areinnocent of, then he is very wrong especially that this has led him
to being determined to divorce you. This is due to the evil of
negative assumption which mostlyresults in bad consequences.
Hence, we first advise you to supplicate Allaah to rectify your
husband and protect him from theevil of his own self and from the evil
whispers of the devil. Then, you should advise him and remind him of
Allaah andof the seriousness of sucha negative assumption. You should
be keen on showing him the contrary of what he thinks, by respecting
him and being concerned about him and being a good wife to him and so
forth. Also, you may seek the help of some rational and righteous
people if necessary.
As regards divorce, in general it leads to many disadvantages, so one
should not resort to it unless it becomes clear that it is the best
solution. For more details, please refer to Fatwa 86307 .
Finally, it should be mentioned that the saying of a husband to his
wife " I divorce you ", in the present tense, doesnot lead to divorce
unlesshe had intended.

the Righteous Wife

believing woman that helps her preserve her honor, dignity and status.
All righteous wives are bashful in their behavior and in everything
else - their clothing, their movement, their speech, their dealings
and their manners.The bashfulness of the believing wife makes her more
adherent tothe Islamic dress code, whether it be Hijaab or the face
cover. She does not wear any thing that is transparent, tight, similar
to men's clothes, ostentatious, scented or enticing. How can she not
do all this when it is an obligation and she would bear sins if she
did not abide by these rules? Allaah The Almighty Says (what means):
} and to wrap [a portion of] their headcovers over their chests { [Quran 24:31]
} O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the
believers to bring down over themselves [part] of their outer
garments. That is more suitable that they will be known and not be
abused. { [Quran 33:59]
} and do not display yourselves as[was] the display of the former
times of ignorance { [Quran 33:33]
How can a woman display herselfas righteous while she displays her
charms to every eye in order to attract attention? What wouldshe then
keep special for her husband? The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam , said: "Bashfulness and faith are inseparable; if one of them
is missing, the other will be missing as well." The woman who exposes
her beauty is not bashful as she does not have this essential
characteristic of Islam. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam ,
said: "Every religion has distinctive morals and bashfulness is the
distinctive moral in Islam." Moreover, the bashfulness of the
believing woman makes her lower her gaze. Allaah The Almighty Says
(what means): } And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their
vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment
except that which [necessarily] appears thereof. { [Quran 24:31]
The righteous believing woman also knows what Allaah The Almighty says
through the wordsof the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam : "The
[forbidden] gaze is one of the poisonous darts of Iblees [Satan]. The
one who avoids it out of fear of Me will be granted such faith that he
feels its sweetness in his heart." Givingfree rein to the gaze brings
nothing but harm as the forbidden gaze is the seed of all evil and can
only lead to evil as it is one of the gates of the devil. The
righteous woman does not underestimate this. The Prophet, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam , saidto Umm Salamah and Maymoonah, may Allaah be
pleased with them: "Are you blind? Do you not see him?" when they were
looking at 'Abdullaah ibn Umm Maktoom, who was a blind man.
The bashfulness of the righteous woman is also exhibited in the way
she speaks. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): } Then do not be
soft in speech [to men], lest he in whose heart is disease should
covet .} [Quran 33:32] The bashfulness of the believing woman is clear
in her behavior, movement and way of walking. Thus, every Muslim woman
should be an embodiment of bashfulness. The best example of
bashfulness is that of the two girls who met Moosa (Moses), may Allaah
exalt his mention. Their bashfulness prevented them from mixing with
men at the well of Madyan. They said (what means): } "We do not water
until the shepherds dispatch [their flocks.]" { [Quran 28:23] This is
the example of the righteous woman who stays at home, and if she
leaves it for a dire necessity then she does so