True stories » Am I jealous or is he a flirt?

I'm trying to find the answer to this question and it's really hard
for me, believe me!
I truly love my husband with whom we've been married for 8 years, the
first 3 of which we spent living separately in different countries.
Now we are already together. In the beginning everything was perfect
and I even feared sharingthis with others because people say "it's too
good to last".
So, I've noticed recently that when we are in a company with
handsomemen my husband is constantly around me and he is very kind and
affectionate to me. I find this normal and I'm quite pleased with it.
I considerthis the right attitude to a wife. I like showing my
feelings towards him in front of people and I'm very happy when they
notice it. The problem is that when we are in a company with
attractive women he changes abruptly – he stops touching me at all,
even keeps a distance, or if I show in some way or another that he is
my beloved husband he is unpleasantly surprised and stands as if
frozen, while his attitude to the other women is more than friendly.
There have been cases when he has spoken to a woman for about 10-15
minutes and haven't even looked at me meanwhile. (to say nothing of
including me in the conversation!). Sometimes I hesitated on leaving
the place in orderto see if he will notice myabsence. I think this
will probably last at least an hour or until he sees some handsome guy
around.
Whenever he meets a woman he will greet her with a hug, in which I
find nothing bad, but after that he will study her from head to toe
while talking to her. Another issue is that when a woman calls him on
the phone he becomes so enthusiastic that you may think this is the
happiest day in his life. However when I call him he gets so awfully
indifferent. And this happens when I'm tellinghim his favorite team
haswon an important game.
After this description of the situation (not mentioning many other
similar cases and the bad thing is unpleasant memories get more and
more) I'm asking you to help me see if I'm too jealous.
I will appreciate this a lotbecause right now I'm onthe verge of a divorce.

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And Allah Knows the Best!

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Published by :->
M NajimudeeN Bsc- INDIA

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The story of Haaroot and Maaroot – I

One of the stories in the Quran, is the story of Haaroot and Maaroot.
Allaah Says what means: "And they [i.e., the Children of Israel]
followed [instead] what the devils had recited during the reign of
Sulaymaan (Solomon ). It was not Sulaymaan who disbelieved, but the
devils disbelieved, teaching people magic and that which was revealed
to the two angels at Babylon, Haaroot and Maaroot. But they [i.e., the
two angels] do not teach anyone unless they say: 'We are a trial, so
do not disbelieve [by practicing magic].' And [yet] they learn from
them that by which they cause separation between a man and his wife.
But they do not harm anyonethrough it except by permission of Allaah.
And they [i.e., people] learn what harms them and does not benefit
them. But they [i.e., the Children of Israel] certainly knew that
whoever purchased it [i.e., magic] would not have in the Hereafter
anyshare. And wretched is that for which they sold themselves, if they
only knew." [Quran 2: 102]
The Children of Israel received a Great Book from Allaah, namely the
Quran, which confirmed what they had been told in the Tawraah (i.e.
Torah); they were claiming to adhere to their scripture, yet they
disbelieved in the Messenger (Muhammad) and a group of them also threw
the Scripture of Allaah (i.e., the Tawraah) behind their backs and
shunned it, despite them knowing that it was the truth, as Allaah
tells us, saying what means: "…A party of those who had been given the
Scripture threw the Scripture of Allaah [i.e., the Tawraah] behind
their backs as if they did not know [what it contained]." [Quran 2:
101]
It is the way of Allaah that He punishes those who shun that which
benefits them; He therefore busies them with things that are of
nobenefit to them, or makes them indulge in what harms them. Whoever
shuns the worship of the Most Merciful will be afflicted with the
worship of idols.
Whoever shuns Islamic monotheism will be afflicted with association
with Allaah. Whoever shuns the Sunnah will be afflicted with religious
innovation. Whoever shuns adhering to the Islamic texts will be
afflicted with blind imitation of others who have no evidence to
backup their actions.
Whoever shuns hoping in, loving and fearing only Allaah will be
afflicted with directing all these acts to other than Him. Whoever
refrains from spending his wealth for the sake ofAllaah will be
afflicted with spending it for the sake of Satan.
Whoever shuns humblinghimself to Allaah will be afflicted with being
humiliated by other people, and whoever shuns the truth will be
afflicted with adhering to falsehood.
This is exactly what happened to the Jews when they shunned the Book
of Allaah; they wereafflicted with following in the footsteps of
Satan. During the reign of Sulaymaan they refused to believe in the
Book of Allaah, and were thus afflicted by following what the devils
recited and invented.
The devils introduced magic to the people and claimed that Sulaymaan
used magic and that it was the means for him tohave such great power
and a vast empire.
Indeed they lied, becauseAllaah is the One who granted him enough
power and such a vast empire that he had no need to resort to magic,
or to seek the help of the devils. As a matter of fact,Allaah
facilitated the devils for the disposal of Sulaymaan ; Allaah Says
what means: "They made for him what he willed ofelevated chambers,
statues, bowls like reservoirs, and stationarykettles…" [Quran 34: 13]
Allaah utilised them for Sulaymaan to use, and so they were under his
command, but after the death of Sulaymaan the devils came out to the
people claiming that the reason behind his controlover them was the
magic he used and practiced, but Allaah exposes their lie saying what
means: "And they [i.e., the Children of Israel] followed [instead]
what the devils had recited during the reign of Sulaymaan. It was not
Sulaymaan who disbelieved …" [Quran 2: 102]
Whoever practices or uses magic is a disbeliever, but Sulaymaan never
disbelieved and never practiced magic; indeed Allaah confirms the very
opposite, saying what means: "…It was not Sulaymaan who disbelieved,
but the devils disbelieved, teaching people magic…"[Quran 2: 102] They
disbelieved by teaching people magic and how touse it, thereby
misguiding them.
The Jews practiced the magic that Allaah sent the two angels with,
namely Haaroot and Maaroot, as a means of testing people and seeing
who amongst His slaves would remain steadfast and who woulddeviate, or
who would remain upon faith and who would disbelieve.
These two angels, Haaroot and Maaroot, were sent to teach people magic
in the land of Babylon in Iraq as a test for these people. Onemay ask:
"How can Allaahsend these two angels to teach people magic if
practicing magic is disbelief?" The answer is that it is done in order
to subject people to a trial, as Allaah Says what means: "…But they
[i.e., the two angels] do not teach anyone unless they say: 'We are a
trial, so do not disbelieve [by practicing magic]…'" [Quran 2: 102]
These angels would initially warn people not to learn this magic, and
that to do so would entail disbelief, but if they insisted on learning
magic, then they would teach them it; this magic could thereafter be
used for prohibited reasons, such as to separate spouses. The Jews
practiced the magic that they accused Sulaymaan of using.
The Jews learnt magic and became specialists init, and to this day the
most skilled magicians are the Jews, especially the Moroccan Jews.
TheseJews shunned the news of the description and imminent arrival of
the Prophet Muhammad that was in their scripture; they also shunned
the new Book (i.e. the Quran); they eschewed allthis and instead
resorted to learning and practicing magic.
In this story, Allaah mentions some of the evilconsequences of magic,
such as what means: "…And [yet] they learn from them that by which
they cause separation between a man and his wife…" [Quran 2: 102]
This is while Allaah describes marriage as something that results in
harmony when He Says what means: "…He placedbetween you [i.e., man and
his wife] affection and mercy…." [Quran 30: 21]
Magic separates man from his wife, which is proof that it does have an
effect, but this effect only occurs by the will of Allaah. Some types
of magic make a person love another and act as ifhe is enslaved to him
or her; such a person would feel that he simply cannot live without
this person; another type of magic results in the opposite, whereby a
person may hate anotherto the extent that he cannot even look him in
the eye; a father can be bewitched in order to make him despise his
children or wife, as in thepreviously mentioned verse of Chapter
Al-Baqarah.
Allaah Says what means: "But they [i.e. the Children of Israel]
certainly knew that whoever purchased it [i.e. learnt and practiced
magic] would not have inthe Hereafter any share." [Quran 2: 102]
The scholars differed in their interpretation of this verse. Some of
them stated that Allaah did not send down these angels with magic to
teach people, but rather it was the devils who taught people magic. On
the other hand, many from the Salaf (predecessors) were of the view
that Allaah sent down to the earth these two angels from the heavens
as a punishment to them; others said that they were angels who
deviated and were an exceptional case from all the other angels, who
never disobey Allaah; yet others said that they were honourable angels
who were sent down to teach people magic as a way of testing them, but
who only taught those who insisted on learning it after having been
informed and reminded that magic is a form of disbelief, and after
having been sternly warned against learning and practicing it.
Undoubtedly, learning magic is prohibited, and practicing it is
disbelief, as indicated in the verse, in addition to many prophetic
narrations thataffirm this fact.

Summary 1) Callers to Jannah (Paradise), and callers to Hell. 2) Iblees(Satan) is the leader of those who call people to Hell. 3) Iblees beatifies unchaste behavior. 4) Mentioning some of Iblees’ ability to misguide people. 5) Iblees has no power against true believers. 6) How to protect ourselves from Iblees. 7) The gradual methodof Iblees to misguide and delude people.

All praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds. May peace and blessing
be upon His Messenger Muhammad (peace and blessing of Allah be upon
him), his family and his companions.
Dear Muslims! Fear Allah in public and private, seek for the pleasure
of the Last Day and do not follow the path of the mischief-makers.
Know that every thing has its beginning and end. Be also aware that
you are now in the abode of trails and that your final destination is
either Paradise of Hell.
The Almighty Allah, has made Islam the only way that leads to Paradise
and He says, "And whoever seeks a religion other than Islam, it will
never be accepted of him, and in the Hereafter he will be one of the
losers." (Aal-'Imraan: 85).
Allah ordains under the shade of Islam, good deeds than can save man
from destruction and protect him from evils. He, the Almighty, created
inhabitants for Paradise who will do righteous deeds, and those who
call unto it such as the Prophets (peace and blessing of Allah be upon
them) and their followers. They are those that Allah has favoured,
given the highest ranks and made them successful in the race towards
good deeds. Allah says, "And whosoever obey Allah and His Messenger,
then they will being in the company of those on whom Allah has
bestowed His Grace, of the Prophets, the Siddiqoon (those followers of
the Prophets, who were first and foremost to believe in them, like
Aboo Bakr As-Siddeeq) the martyrs and the righteous. And how excellent
these companions are! Such is the Bounty from Allah and Allah is
Sufficient as All-Knower." (An-Nisaa: 69-70).
Their conduct is excellent, their private is clean and their deeds
arepure. Their reward then was happiness in this world and the next,
crowned with everlastingdwelling in Paradise.
Equally, Allah Created inhabitants for the Hell-Fire and destined that
they shall not do but deeds that will lead themthere. Allah explains
the way that leads to Hell andwarns against treading that path. He
says, "And whosoever disobeys Allahand His Messenger, then verily, for
him is the Hell-Fire, he shall dwell therein forever." (Al-Jinn: 23).
Further, this abode in which Allah created different kinds of
everlasting torment has those who call unto it. Allah says, "And we
made them leader inviting to the Fire; and to the Day of Resurrection,
they will not be helped. And We make a curse to follow them in this
world, and on the Day of Resurrection they will be among those who are
prevented from receivingAllah's Mercy or any good; despised or
destroyed." (Al-Qasas: 41-42).
Brothers in Eemaan ! Callers to Hell encourage man to disobey Allah
and call him to commit destructive sins. The mostwicked and vicious
one in this respect evil is Satan, the accursed. Allahhas put people
to test by him that He might know the obedient and disobedient ones
among His slaves and give the reward or punishment accordingly. He
says, "Andindeed Satan did prove his thought about them; and they
followed him allexcept a group of true believers. And he (Satan) had
no authority over them, except that We might test him who believes in
the hereafter from him who is in doubtabout it and your Lord is
Watchful over everything." (Saba': 20-21).
This extremely malicious creature who calls to every abominable act
hasbeen given only a limitedpower which he can never exceed. Also,
Allah has given the true believer a weapon by which he can drive away
his evil. He gave Satan an ability to cause devilish insinuations in
human mind, so that man may think of committing sin, then have the
intention to commit it and finally commit of that sin. Allah also gave
him an ability to present a sin to man ina favourable light. Allah
says, "And Satan made fair-seeming to them, that which they used to
do." (Al-An'aam: 43).
However, Allah did not give Satan an ability to create the love of
something in man's mind, for that exclusively belongs to Allah. He
says: "And know that there is the Messenger of Allah among you. If he
were toobey you (i.e. follow youropinions and desires) in much of the
matter, you would surely be in trouble. But Allah has endeared the
faith to youand has beautified it in your hearts, and has made
disbelief, wickedness and disobedience (to Allah and His Messenger)
hateful to you. Such are they who are the rightly guided."
(Al-Hujuraat: 7).
Also, Allah gave this vicious Satan an ability toinstigate the
disbelievers to commit sins as He gavehim ability to drive man into
rage and cause him to have devilish thoughts. Allah says, "See you not
that We have sent the devils against the disbelievers to push them to
do evil." (Mariam:83).
All these devilish tricks of Satan that Allah informedus about are but
weak tricks that get weakened and eliminated by Eemaan and seeking the
protection of Allah. He says, "Ever feeble indeed is the plan of
Satan." (An-Nisaa': 76).
Allah also says of him, "Verily! He has no power over those who
believe and put their trust in their Lord (Allah). His power is only
over those who obey and follow him(Satan) and those who join partner
with Him (Allah)" (An-Nahl: 99-100).
He indeed has no power over the believers who put their trust in
Allah. This enemy, whom we believe in his existence, whose impacts we
feel and the result of whose evil deeds we know has laid in wait for
men in ways that lead to good deeds in order to preventthem from doing
it. Allah says, "(Satan) said: Because you have sent me astray,
surely. I will sitin wait against them (human beings) on Your Straight
Path. Then I will come to them from their front and rear, their
rightand left, and You will not find most of them as thankful ones."
(Al-A'raaf:16-17).
Brothers in faith! We cannot prevent the evils of Satan, or render his
plans ineffective or escape from his traps except by seeking Allah's
protection. Allah says, "And whoever holds firm to Allah (i.e. follows
Allah's religion and obeysall that Allah has ordered practically),
then He is indeed guided to the right path." (Aal-'Imraan: 101).
Brothers in Islam! Allah has explained to us that this avowed enemy
leads man to sin and destructive acts and then abandon him. He has
made Shirk (associating partners to Allah in acts of worship) fair
seeming to the peoples of Noah , ' Aad , Thamood ; made sodomy fair
seeming to the people of Prophet Loot and made different kinds of sins
fair-seemingto many others, but when the repercussions of their evil
deeds came upon them, he disowned and abandoned them.
Allah says, "(Their allies deceived them) like Satan, when he says to
man: 'Disbelieve in Allah!'But when (man) disbelieves in Allah,
Satansays: 'I am free of you, I fear Allah, the Lord of all the
worlds'. So the end ofboth will be that, they will be in the Fire
abidingtherein. Such is the recompense of the wrong-doers" (Al-Hashr:
16-17).
As for the Day of the Resurrection, Satan will stand on a mountain of
fire and deliver a speech to his followers as Allah informs: "Verily,
Allah promised you a truth. And I promised you, but I betrayed you. I
had no authority over you except that I called you and you responded
to me. So blame me not but blame yourselves. I cannot help you nor can
you help me. I deny your former act in associating me as a partner
with Allah( by obeying me in the life of the world).' Verily, there is
a painful torment to the wrong-doers." (Ibraheem: 22).
After this speech, nothingmore will be heard except sighing in a high
and low tone, regret, crying and wailing. Then Allah will say: "Remain
you in it with ignominy! And speak you not to Me." (Al-Mu'minoon:
108).
Dear brothers! Evil of Satan can also be avertedby seeking refuge with
Allah from him. Allah says, "And if an evil whisper from Satan tries
to turn you away (from doing good), then seek refuge in Allah. Verily,
He is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower." (Fussilat: 36).
In the Ha deeth , it is reported that two men abused each other in
the presence of the Messenger of Allah and the face of one of them
turned red (out of severe rage). The Messenger of Allah said: 'I know
a wordthat if this man says it, hisanger will go away. It is, 'A'oodhu
Billaahi Minash-Shaytaanir-Rajeem." (I seek refuge with Allah from
Satan, the accursed".
One can also prevent the evil plan of Satan by observing the prayers
in congregation. Allah says, "Verily, As-Salaah (prayer) prevents from
Al-Fahsha (i.e. great sins and every kind, unlawful sexual
intercourse) and Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism and every kind
of evil wicked deed)" (Al-Ankaboot: 45).
The Prophet also said: "whoever observes Fajr prayer in congregation
shall remain under Allah'sprotection until evening, so, do not let
Allah found you wanting in fulfilling His rights upon you".
Evils of Satan can also be prevented by reading Aayatul-Kursiy (Qur'an
2:255), Sooratul-Ikhlaas (Chapter 112) Al-Mu'awwidhatayn (Chapters 113
and 114) and Sooratul-Ghaafir (Chapter 40) at the end ofeach prayer.
One should also be reciting the Qur'aan frequently, for, the more he
recites; the more he protects himself from Satan.
Likewise is paying Zakaat , making voluntary charity and spending in
the good cause. The Prophet said: "Charity erases sins as water blows
out fire." When a Muslim is cleansed of all his sins, he is then
saves from a great evil.
One can also drive away evil plans of Satan by constantly remembering
Allah by saying "SubhaanAllah" (glory be to Allah), "Alhamdulillaah"
(praise be to Allah) "Allahu Akbar" ( Allah is the Greatest) "Laa
Ilaaha Illa Allah" (None has the rightto be worshipped except Allah)
etc. The Prophet e said: "Whoever says, "La Ilaaha Illa Allah
WahdahuLaa Shareeka Lahoo, Lahul-Mulk, Walahul-Hamdu Wa Huwa Alaa
Kulli Shay'in Qadeer," ( meaning: There is no deity worthy of worship
except Allah. He is One without any partner. To Him belongs
sovereignty and praise and He has power over all things) hundred times
a day, thatwill be enough for him asa protection from Satan for the
whole day. it is also as if he has freed a slave and one hundred
good deeds will be recorded for him."
Making Jihaad in the way of Allah, attending gatherings of
knowledgeand where good deeds are done, keeping away from gatherings
of play which Satan attends and in which he causes enmity, hatred and
misery also protect from the evil plans of Satan.
Further, foremost of the things that protect one from the devilish
plans ofSatan is Tawheed (belief in Islamic monotheism), putting one's
trust in Allah and being sincere in worshipping Him. Allahsays,
"Certainly, you (Satan) shall have no authority over My slaves except
those who follow you and those who go astray (the criminals,
polytheisms and evil-doers)." (Al-Hijr: 42).
Therefore, dear Muslims, beware of Satan's footsteps and evil plans.
Allah says, "O you who believe! Enter perfectly inIslam and follow not
the footsteps of Satan. Verily,he is to you a plain enemy. Then if you
slide back after the clear signs have come to you, then know that
Allah is All-Mighty, All-Wise." (Al-Baqarah: 208-209).
Brothers in faith! Fear Allah as He should be feared and know that
Satan calls man to all evil things and prevents him from doing any
good deed. The first thing that Satan calls to is disbelief in Allah.
If one responds to him, he has surrendered his affairs tohim; Satan
will then lead him to all evil and destructive things in this world
and the Hereafter. But if man does not respond to him when he invites
him to disbelief, he calls him to Bid'ah (innovations in matters of
religion), for a person who indulges in Bid'ah does not generally
repent from it, because he regards that as part ofhis religion, and
this gladdens Satan. If Satan is unable to make him indulge in Bid'ah,
he invites him to committingmajor sins, then to minor ones. If he does
not succeed in doing that, he distracts him from doing recommendable
deeds with indulgence in lawfulthings and engages him with matters
that are of no concern to him.
Satan by his nature, searches man's mind and looks for his preferences
in order to approach himthrough that and make him commit sins through
what he has inclinations to. Allah says, "O mankind! Verily! The
promise of Allah is true. So let not this present lifedeceive you and
let not the chief deceiver [Satan]deceive you about Allah. Surely,
Satan is an enemyto you, so treat him as an enemy. He only invites
hisfollowers that they may become the dwellers of the blazing Fire."
(Faatir: 6-7).
Furthermore, Satan is pleased by sins that man regards as
insignificant, therefore beware of him.The Prophet said: "Satan has
lost hope that peoplewould worship him in the Arabian Peninsula, but
he is pleased to sow discard among you."

Masturbation in Islam

Allah (Exalted is He) says: "And those who guard their private parts
from their wives and those (slave-girls) which their right-hands own -
so there is no blame upon them. Then whoever seeks beyond that (which
is lawful), they are the transgressors".
Masturbation is also considered as "seeking beyond" with reference to
the Quranic verse above.
Suhail son of Sai'd (may Allah be pleased with them) narrates that the
Holy Prophet (Allah's' Grace & Peace be upon him) said: Whoever
givesme the assurance (not tounlawfully use) what is between their
jaws and their legs (i.e. the tongue and the private parts), I give
them the assurance of the Heaven.(Bukhari)
Abu Hurrairah (may Allahbe pleased with him) narrates that the Prophet
of Allah (Allah's Grace & Peace be upon him) said: Whoever
Allahprotects, from the evil (sh'r) of what is betweentheir jaws and
between their legs, will enter Paradise. [Tirimzi]
Imam Shamsuddin Zahabbi (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates a
Prophetic narration that, "Seven people are such that Allah has cursed
them and He will not even casta look of mercy upon them on the Day of
Judgment. Allah will tell them to enter Hell with the people who are
going to Hell, except those who repent.
1. One who performs theact of sodomy.
2. One upon whom the act of sodomy is performed.
3. One who does bad deeds with animals.
4. One who marries his mother or sister.
5. One who masturbates." (The words of the hadith says these seven
people but lists five - Kitab-ul-Kaba'ir p.48)
Allama Mahmood Alussi (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates in
Ruh-ul-Ma'ni: "Atta (may Allah be pleased with him) says that I have
heard that on the Day of Judgment one group will be brought in such
away that their hands willbe pregnant. I think theyare the
masturbators." Allama Alussi further says: Saéed bin Jubayr (may Allah
be pleased with him) narrates that the Prophet (Allah's Grace & Peace
be upon him) said: "Allah Exalted will inflict punishment on a group
of people because they misused their private parts." (Ruh-ul-Ma'ni p.
291)
Anas (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Prophet of
Allah (may Allah be pleased with him) said: "The person who performs
marriage [nikah] with his hands (i.e. masturbates) is cursed." (Fatawa
Razaviyya, Vol. 10, p.80)
Abdullah bin Masood (may Allah be pleased with him) reports that the
Holy Prophet (Allah's Grace & Peace be upon him) said: "O group of
youth! Whoever from among you can marry should do so because it keeps
the gaze low and it protects the private parts. And he who cannot
marry should fastbecause fasting breaks lust." (Muslim – Book of
Marriage)
Mufti Waqar-ud-din Al-Qadri (Hanfi) writes in"Waqar-ul-Fatawa" (Vol.
1, P. 269): "If a person is overpowered by sexual desire such that
there is fear of him becoming involved in adultery or he is not
capable of marrying or his wife is so far that he can't go there. Then
it is hoped there is no punishment for the one doing this
[masturbation]. It is written in "Durr-e-Mukhtar" (Vol. 2, Pp 109) (by
Sheikh Alla'ud Din Muhammed son of Ali Haskiffi, died 1088H): 'If
there is fear of committing adultery then it is hoped that there is no
punishment on the one doing this (masturbation)'. Allama (Syed
Mohammed Amin Ash-Shaheerba Bin Abideen) Shammi, (may Allah's mercy be
upon him, died 1253H) has also argued on this quitea lot and decided
that if he does this with the intention of saving himself from
committingsin it will not be a sin and if he does it with the
intention of enjoyment he will be a sinner."
The Holy Prophet (Allah'sGrace & Peace be upon him) said, "No doubt
the virtues wipe away the sins". Therefore a masturbator must
repentsincerely with an intention that he will never commit it again
and do good deeds. According to a Propheticnarration, "The one
whorepents is like the who does not have any sin."