A young man wants to follow the Sunnah but his father is Shi’i and wants to prevent him from following true guidance. What advice can you give?

I am 15 years old and I have just begun to adhere to the teachings of
Islam. The only source I have for learning the religion is Islamic
sites on the Internet, like this site of yours, because I do not have
anyone whocan take me to the mosque, which is 5 milesaway from where I
live and walking there is very dangerous. In addition to that, my
father wants to prevent me from using the Internet so that I will
focus more on my studies. He also hates meto read or learn from your
site, because he is Shi'i and he says that you will brainwash me. He
is insisting on teaching me the Shi'i madhhab, and even their way of
praying which I find is very different from the way other Muslims
pray. I do not know what I should do now. Can you advise me?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly, we praise Allah for having guided you tothe truth, and we ask
Him to make you steadfast and help you to attain all that is good.
Remember that you havebeen greatly blessed, and if you devote your
entire life and wealth for that purpose, that will be little in return
forthat blessing. Do you know how many millions of people of your
father's background worship rocks and human beings? Do you know that
all these people believe that the Qur'aan is distorted and they regard
the Sahaabah as kaafirs, apart from a fewof them? Do you know that
these people have revived the shirk of Jaahiliyyah and added more
forms of shirk thanwere known in the past?
We do not call people to anything except worshipof Allah, may He be
exalted, and we also call people to venerate and respect the Prophet
(blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) and not to impugn his
honour or slander his Companions. As we love all of the Sahaabah and
pray that Allah be pleased with them, and we seek to draw closer to
Allah by loving them, we also love and respect the people of the
Prophet's household (Ahlal-Bayt), and we seek to draw closer to Allah
by loving them.
Secondly:
With regard to your dealings with your father, what we advise you is:
1. Be kind in your dealings with him as much as possible.
2. Strive to serve him as much as you are able, and do not spare
any effort in doing so. Do not withhold any help orkind treatment from
him.
3. Focus on your studies and do not let your neglect of them be a
cause of you losing your religious commitment. What we understand from
your message is that your father wants to take steps to prevent you
from accessing our site and other beneficial Islamic sites because of
your studies. So do not give him that excuse; study and progress in
your studies; close the door to your father's shaytaan so that he will
not be able to make the issue of your studies a means of preventing
youfrom following true guidance.
4. Do not make an open show of visiting useful Islamic websites in
front of him, and do not make an open show of your following the path
of Ahl al-Sunnah in front of him. Even more important is not
arguingand debating with regard to good matters, because doing that
openly may motivate him to prevent you from following the path of true
guidance.
5. Pray for him and forall of your family to be guided to the
right path.Strive to make this du'aa' when you are prostrating and
during the last third of the night.
6. Finally, we advise you to use wisdom in dealing with your
father. If he teaches you to pray in the Shi'i manner and you cannot
reject it, then accept it from him and pretend toagree with him, but
prayin the manner established in the sound Sunnah. With regard to the
way the prayer is done, the matter is broad in scope in sha Allah, and
you come under the heading of one who is forced to do something. You
are at anage when you are not old enough to separate from him, so be
patient until the time comes when you can leave, then if Allah guides
your father before that, you can stay with them, or you can leave and
live independently, so as to protect your religious commitment.
And Allah knows best.

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What if you find a watch in the sand?

Suppose you find a watch in the middle of a desert. What would you
conclude? Would you think that someone dropped the watch? Or would you
suppose that the watch came by itself?
Of course no sane personwould say that the watch just happened to
emerge from the sand. All the intricate working parts could not simply
develop from the metals the lay buried in the earth. The watch must
have a manufacturer.
If a watch tells accurate time we expect the manufacturer must be
intelligent. Blind chance cannot produce a working watch.
But what else tells accurate time? Consider the sunrise and sunset.
Their timings are so strictly regulated that scientists can publish in
advance the sunrise and sunset times in your daily newspapers. But who
regulates the timings of sunrise and sunset? If a watch can not work
without an intelligent maker, how can the sun appear to rise and set
with such clockwork regularity? Could this occur by itself?
Consider also that we benefit from the sun only because it remains at
a safe distance from the earth, a distance thataverages 93 million
miles. If it got much closer the earth would burn up. And if it got
toofar away the earth would turn into an icy planet making human life
here impossible. Who decided in advancethat this was the right
distance? Could it just happen by chance?
Without the sun plants would not grow. Then animals and humans would
starve. Did the sun just decide to be there for us?
The rays of the sun would be dangerous for us had it not been for the
protective ozone layer in our atmosphere.The atmosphere around earth
keeps the harmful ultraviolet rays from reaching us. Who was it that
placed this shield around us?
We need to experience sunrise. We need the sun's energy and it's light
to see our way during the day. But we also need sunset. We need a
break from the heat, we need the cook of night and we need the lights
to out so we may sleep. Who regulated this process toprovide what we
need?
Moreover, if we had onlythe sun and the protection of the atmosphere
we would want something more-beauty. Our clothes provide warmth and
protection, yet we design them to also look beautiful. Knowing or need
for beauty, the designer of sunrise and sunset also made the view of
them to be simply breathtaking.
The creator who gave uslight, energy, protection and beauty deserves
ourthanks. Yet some people insist that he does not exist. What would
they think if they found a watch in the desert? An accurate, working
watch? A beautifully designed watch? Would they not conclude that
there does exist a watchmaker? An intelligent watchmaker? One who
appreciates beauty? Such is God whomade us. SubhanAllah!

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Hadees ~ Rain water, snow, and hail:

These substances are pure because Allah says so: "And sent down water
from the sky upon you, that thereby He might purify you..." (al-Anfal
1), and"We send down purifying water from the sky" (al-Furqan 48).
This is also supported by the following hadith: Abu Hurairah reported
that the Messenger of Allah, upon whom be peace, used to be silent
between the (opening) takbir of the prayer and the verbal Qur'anic
recitation. Abu Hurairah asked him, "O Messenger of Allah, may my
father and mother be sacrificed for you, why do you remain silent
between the takbirand the recital? What do you say(silently during
that time)?" He said, "I say, 'O Allah, make a distance between me and
my sins similar to the distance you have made between the East and the
West. O Allah, cleanse me of my sins in the manner that a white
garment (is cleansed) from dirt. O Allah, wash my sins from me with
snow, water, and hail."' This hadith is related by the "group", except
for at-Tirmizhi.

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He withheld from her many details about himself and his family; should she ask for a divorce?

I met my husband at work, we became friends and he had asked me to
marry him;although he lived on his own at the time and was not keeping
in touch with his parents. The story that he told mewas incomplete; he
had told us about his abuse as a child although did not advise that
his mother also beat up his father, on a regular basis. My parents
objected to his parents not being involved in the wedding, although
agreed eventually,based on what my husband had told them about the
parents being well educated with good careers. My husband kept the
details to himself in the fear of my parents not letting him marry me.
Also, because of an abusive childhood,my husband got involved in bad
habits when he left home at the age of 19 ; to cure his depression he
had taken up the hobby of pot smoking. When I methim, I felt bad for
him and after much speculation, agreed to mary him on one condition,
that he wouldgive up pot smoking.
7 years and two childrenlater, last yr, I find out alldetails on how
his parents and other familyis,(that his mother is a sadist)& also
discovered that he still smokes up on rare occasions.
This puts me off completely and I am not attracted o him anymore. I
discussed thiswith him in details and when I asked him to promise him
not to smoke weed again, he exclaimed that he cannot promise me this.
This breaks my heart, I feel like I was taken advantage of, and was
very naive to have believed in him. I regret my decision and think I
could have done so much better than him. We dont make a good
couple...because of his lifestyle pre-marriage, he is overweight and I
find it hard to feel attracted towards him.
Mind you he does pray maghrib at the mosque every now and then.
Please advise if I am crazy for thinking this and should I just move
on ignoring this.
Praise be to Allaah.
With regard to your husband smoking hashish (weed, pot), or consuming
other intoxicants or drugs, thisrequires a great deal of struggle and
advice, andseeking help from good and righteous people, sothat he can
give up this evil habit. If you find that he responds and is sincere,
this is what you want, but if you do not get that response from him,
then in that case there is no doubt that you have the right to askfor
a divorce and to annull your marriage with him.
But in fact dealing with this matter requires looking at various
aspects of your life, including your children if you have children,
andwhat will happen to them after this divorce; will you be able to
take care of them and look after them, or not? If youdo not have
children, then the matter is easier.
You mentioned that he prays. If he prays regularly or he prays most of
the time, but he does not pray in the mosque, then even though he has
done something reprehensible, there is still hope for him so longas he
still prays.
But if he does not pray at all, there is nothing good in him for you
and such a person does not deserve to have you staywith him.
See the answer to question no. 47335 and 172999 .
We advise you to fear Allah, may He be glorified and exalted.
Fulfilling the rights of Allah and obeying Him, and fulfilling the
husband's rights, are among the most important means of solving
marital problems. Moreover you should understand that whatever trials
befall an individual in his wealth, his family or his child, may stem
from himself in the first place: "And whatever of misfortune befalls
you, it is because of what your hands haveearned" [ash-Shoora 42:30].
So we advise you to be patient with your husband whilst continuing to
offer sincere advice and praying for him, until Allah sets him
straight. Please see the answers to questions no. 9497 , 142326 and
32450 for means that will help you to deal with the problems you have
mentioned.
If he mends his ways, all well and good; otherwise you can ask for a
divorce if you cannot be patient with your husband's annoyances and
can no longer carry on living with him, or if you fear for yourself,
your religious commitment oryour children if you stay with him.