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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

10 Choices You Will Regret in 10 Years

These two words paired together create one of the saddestphrases in
the English language.
Here are ten choices that ultimately lead to this phrase of regret,
and how to elude them:
1. Wearing a mask to impress others. – If the face you always show the
world is a mask, someday there will be nothing beneath it. Because
when you spend too much time concentrating on everyone else's
perception of you, or who everyone else wants you to be, you
eventually forget who you really are. So don'tfear the judgments of
others; you know in your heart who you areand what's true to you. You
don't have to be perfect to impress and inspire people . Let them be
impressed andinspired by how you deal with your imperfections.
2. Letting someone else create your dreams for you. – The greatest
challenge in life is discovering who you are; the second greatest is
being happywith what you find. A big part of this is your decision to
stay true to your own goals and dreams. Do you have people who
disagree with you? Good. It means you're standing your ground and
walking your own path. Sometimes you'll do things considered crazy by
others, but when you catch yourself excitedly losing track of time,
that's when you'll know you're doing the right thing. Read The 4-Hour
Workweek .
3. Keeping negative company. – Don't let someone who has a bad
attitude give it to you. Don't let them get to you. They can't pull
the trigger if you don't hand them the gun. When you remember that
keeping the company of negative people is a choice, instead of an
obligation, you free yourself to keep the company of compassion
instead of anger, generosity instead of greed, and patience instead of
anxiety.
4. Being selfish and egotistical. – A life filledwith loving deeds and
good character is the best tombstone. Those who you inspired and
shared your love with will remember how you made them feel long after
your time has expired. So carve your name on hearts , not stone.
What you have done for yourself alone dies with you; what you have
done for others and the world remains.
5. Avoiding change and growth. – If you want to know your past look
into your present conditions. If you wantto know your future look
into your present actions. You must let go of the old to make way for
the new; the old way is gone, never to come back. If you acknowledge
this right now and take steps to address it, you will position
yourself for lasting success. The Power of Habit .
6. Giving up when the going gets tough. – There are no failures, just
results. Even if things don't unfold the way you had expected, don't
be disheartened or give up. Learn what you can and move on. The one
who continuesto advance one step at a time will win in the end.
Because the battleis always won far away and long before the final
victory. It's a process that occurs with small steps, decisions, and
actions that gradually build upon each other and eventually lead to
that glorious moment of triumph.
7. Trying to micromanageevery little thing. – Life should be touched,
not strangled. Sometimes you've got to relax and let life happen
without incessant worry and micromanagement. Learn to let go a little
before you squeeze tootight. Take a deep breath. When the dust
settles and you can once again see the forest for the trees, take the
next step forward. You don't have to know exactly where you're going
to be headed somewhere great. Everything in life is in perfect order
whether you understand it yet or not. It just takes some time to
connect all the dots.
8. Settling for less than you deserve. – Be strong enough to let goand
wise enough to wait for what you deserve. Sometimes you have to get
knocked down lower than you have ever been to stand up taller than you
ever were before. Sometimes your eyes need to be washed by your tears
so you can see the possibilities in front of you with a clearer vision
again. Don't settle.
9. Endlessly waiting until tomorrow. – The trouble is, you always
think you have more time than you do. But one day you will wake up
and there won't be any more time to work on the things you've always
wanted to do. And at that point you either will have achieved the
goals you set for yourself, or you will have a list of excuses for why
you haven't. Read The Last Lecture .
10. Being lazy and wishy-washy. – The world doesn't owe you anything,
you owe theworld something. So stop daydreaming andstart DOING.
Develop abackbone, not a wishbone. Take full responsibility for
yourlife – take control. You are important andyou are needed. It's
too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday.
Someday is now; the somebody the world needs is YOU .
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8 Dangerous Things We Teach Each Other

and menacing lessons society teaches. To truly thrive in this world
you're going to have to unlearn and disregard some of the ludicrous
advice people reflexively pass along to each other.
Here are eight dangerouspieces of advice you may have learned:
1. There is a clear paththat everyone should follow.
Your greatest fear shouldnot be of failure, but of succeeding in life
at all the wrong things.
Choose a path that fits YOU. Those who follow the crowd usually get
lostin it. Challenge yourself to ask with each and every step, each
focus point that consumes yourenergy: "Does this thing I'm doing right
now serve me and those I careabout in the next few minutes, few
months, and few years?"
Whatever you settle on, just make sure you don't gain the whole world
by losing your soul and purpose in the process. Read The Untethered
Soul .
2. Success is a particular outcome or object that can be acquired.
Success is a consistent pattern of behavior moreso than it is an
isolated event. It is the way you live rather than some object or
outcome you acquire. Success is yours when you persistently embody
the discipline, integrity, attitude, and other attributes from which
it is derived.
It is a mindset within you. If you consider success to be something
outside of you, that's where it will always remain – somewhere else.
So in your thoughts, your words, your actions and your expectations,
be the living embodiment of success, and whatever you touch will have
the potential to be successfultoo.
3. You need more to be happy.
You are doing just fine. You don't need any moreor any less to be happy.
Life would be so different if you stopped allowing other people to
dilute or poison your perception with their words and opinions.
Happiness is derived from the way you see your own life; it depends on
your thoughts, not on what you have or what you do not have, or
whatother people think aboutwhat you have. Read The How of Happiness .
4. Rejection and criticism stifle growth.
No matter how good youare at something there will always be people who
criticize your efforts. And while it's never a comfortable
experience, the feelings of criticism and rejection can actually help
you access your more creative self. Free from the expectations of
maintaining a status-quothat everyone is pleased with, you can push
the limits of innovation and self expression.
5. The future is what matters most.
Right now you are alive. This moment is your life. Today is too
valuable to waste thinking of another time and place.
Your friends and family are too beautiful to ignore. Take a moment to
remember how fortunate you are to be breathing. Take a look around,
with your eyes earnestly open to the possibilities before you. Much
of what you fear does not exist. Much of what you love is closer than
you realize. You arejust one brief thought away from understanding
the blessing that is your life.
6. Big opportunities only come to a lucky few.
Big opportunities come to those who make the most of little
opportunities. Little opportunities are present in each moment and in
every situation.
Today is filled with little opportunities. Everywhere you look, there
are small ways for you to make a positive difference. In little bits
of time that might otherwise be wasted, there is a piece of something
larger waitingto be created. String enough of these pieces together,
and absolutely anything is within your reach. You just need to decide
what it is you want to achieve. Read Secrets of the Millionaire Mind .
7. All relationships should be held on to and nurtured.
Most people come into your life temporarily simply to teach you
something. They come and they go and they make a difference. And
it's okay that they're not in your life anymore.
Not all relationships last, but the lessons these relationships bring
to you do. If you learn to open your heart and mind, anyone,
including the folks who eventually drive you crazy, can teach you
something worthwhile.
Sometimes it will feel weird when you realize you spent so much time
with someone you are nolonger connected to, but that's exactly how
it's supposed to be. You are exactly where you're supposed to be. We
all are.
8. The past is indicative of the future.
The mindset of your past being indicative of your future is hogwash.
Do not judge your failed attempts and mistakes as an indication of
your future potential, but as part of your growth process. Your past
has given you the strength and wisdom you have today, so celebrate it
anduse the knowledge you've gained. Don't let it haunt you and hold
you back.
Quite often, the successful people who act the happiest are the ones
who have overcomethe most. Sometimes youhave to lose something
precious in order to gain something priceless. So if you hit rock
bottom, just think, you've got nothing to lose, everything to gain,
and asolid foundation withoutexpectations or obligations from which to
rebuild your life

Her husband's desire of divorce is based on false accusations

Assalamu-alikum, married, has 2 kids, my husband accused me of I am
willing to harm him by putting some kind of shyton deeds, such as
poison him with shyton deeds. I never done any of these things he
accused me with and never willing to do, because it is shrike. I
lovemy Allah more than him and I love my Hakira (here after,) may
Allah grated me with his Janna/Haven, that is my only wish. Now he is
willing todivorce me and he already said once "I divorce you" with
something I never done. My question is I still love him and still
willing to keep our marriage for the sake of our little children. I
try to convincehim that I never comment in such sin, but still he is
not willing to accept or believe me. Even though, I have not done such
sin, I don't want him to divorce me because of this reason and I don't
want him to accuse me with it too, because it hurt me so much. Please
give me an advice on what decision Ishould take. Accept his wish or
stay fight for our marriage and make dua for me please, thank you
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify
that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad
, is His Slave and Messenger.
It is Islamically established that in principle a Muslim is innocent
of any accusations, and it is an obligation to think good of him
unless the contrary is proven against him. Allaah Says (what means): {
O you who have believed, avoidmuch [negative] assumption. Indeed, some
assumption is sin. } [Quran 49:12] For more benefit, please refer to
Fataawa 92038 and 128834 .
Therefore, if your husband accuses you of something which you
areinnocent of, then he is very wrong especially that this has led him
to being determined to divorce you. This is due to the evil of
negative assumption which mostlyresults in bad consequences.
Hence, we first advise you to supplicate Allaah to rectify your
husband and protect him from theevil of his own self and from the evil
whispers of the devil. Then, you should advise him and remind him of
Allaah andof the seriousness of sucha negative assumption. You should
be keen on showing him the contrary of what he thinks, by respecting
him and being concerned about him and being a good wife to him and so
forth. Also, you may seek the help of some rational and righteous
people if necessary.
As regards divorce, in general it leads to many disadvantages, so one
should not resort to it unless it becomes clear that it is the best
solution. For more details, please refer to Fatwa 86307 .
Finally, it should be mentioned that the saying of a husband to his
wife " I divorce you ", in the present tense, doesnot lead to divorce
unlesshe had intended.

the Righteous Wife

believing woman that helps her preserve her honor, dignity and status.
All righteous wives are bashful in their behavior and in everything
else - their clothing, their movement, their speech, their dealings
and their manners.The bashfulness of the believing wife makes her more
adherent tothe Islamic dress code, whether it be Hijaab or the face
cover. She does not wear any thing that is transparent, tight, similar
to men's clothes, ostentatious, scented or enticing. How can she not
do all this when it is an obligation and she would bear sins if she
did not abide by these rules? Allaah The Almighty Says (what means):
} and to wrap [a portion of] their headcovers over their chests { [Quran 24:31]
} O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the
believers to bring down over themselves [part] of their outer
garments. That is more suitable that they will be known and not be
abused. { [Quran 33:59]
} and do not display yourselves as[was] the display of the former
times of ignorance { [Quran 33:33]
How can a woman display herselfas righteous while she displays her
charms to every eye in order to attract attention? What wouldshe then
keep special for her husband? The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam , said: "Bashfulness and faith are inseparable; if one of them
is missing, the other will be missing as well." The woman who exposes
her beauty is not bashful as she does not have this essential
characteristic of Islam. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam ,
said: "Every religion has distinctive morals and bashfulness is the
distinctive moral in Islam." Moreover, the bashfulness of the
believing woman makes her lower her gaze. Allaah The Almighty Says
(what means): } And tell the believing women to reduce [some] of their
vision and guard their private parts and not expose their adornment
except that which [necessarily] appears thereof. { [Quran 24:31]
The righteous believing woman also knows what Allaah The Almighty says
through the wordsof the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam : "The
[forbidden] gaze is one of the poisonous darts of Iblees [Satan]. The
one who avoids it out of fear of Me will be granted such faith that he
feels its sweetness in his heart." Givingfree rein to the gaze brings
nothing but harm as the forbidden gaze is the seed of all evil and can
only lead to evil as it is one of the gates of the devil. The
righteous woman does not underestimate this. The Prophet, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam , saidto Umm Salamah and Maymoonah, may Allaah be
pleased with them: "Are you blind? Do you not see him?" when they were
looking at 'Abdullaah ibn Umm Maktoom, who was a blind man.
The bashfulness of the righteous woman is also exhibited in the way
she speaks. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): } Then do not be
soft in speech [to men], lest he in whose heart is disease should
covet .} [Quran 33:32] The bashfulness of the believing woman is clear
in her behavior, movement and way of walking. Thus, every Muslim woman
should be an embodiment of bashfulness. The best example of
bashfulness is that of the two girls who met Moosa (Moses), may Allaah
exalt his mention. Their bashfulness prevented them from mixing with
men at the well of Madyan. They said (what means): } "We do not water
until the shepherds dispatch [their flocks.]" { [Quran 28:23] This is
the example of the righteous woman who stays at home, and if she
leaves it for a dire necessity then she does so

Nurturing ourselves

In our fast-paced lives, it is difficult to place a priority on
nurturing ourselves. Women are particularly prone to ignoring their
own needs and neglecting themselves as they give much of their time
and energy to others.
Women are natural caretakers who instinctively focus on the well-being
of other people. We tend to think that nurturing ourselves will not
complete a project, care for a loved one, make money, or get dinner on
the table. With work, home, and other responsibilities, nurturing
ourselves often moves to the bottom of the to-do list, if it makes it
to the list at all.
The meaning of nurture
Nurture means to take care of self, to give time to self, to nourish,
to cherish and cultivate. Just as we nourish and feed our physical
body, we also need to nourish others aspects of ourselves. Just as we
cherish others, we need to cherish ourselves. The opposite would beto
disregard, ignore, or neglect the self. Nurturance and nourishment of
self is important for various reasons.
Why is it important to nurture ourselves?
The following story was once told:
"Suppose you were to come uponsomeone in the woods working feverishly
to saw down a tree. 'What are you doing?' you ask. 'Can't you see?'
comes the impatient reply. 'I'm sawing down this tree.' 'You look
exhausted!' you exclaim. 'How long have you been at it?' 'Over 5
hours,' he returns, 'and I'm beat! This is hard work.' 'Well, why
don't you take a break for a few minutes and sharpen the saw?' you
inquire. 'I'm sure it would goa lot faster.' 'I don't have time to
sharpen the saw the man says emphatically. 'I'm too busy sawing!"
We are too busy working and taking care of others to nurture
ourselves. Over time, this leads todepletion of our energy,
patience,creativity and relationship skills. Over time, our saws
become dull because we are too busy sawing away to take a break. We
find that we have little to give to others because we have not taken
the time to take care of ourselves.
The solution is to learn how to nurture ourselves so that we can
refill the depleted energy, compassion, and kindness. Nurturing
ourselves increases ourchances of success in all of our relationships.
It makes us happier, more fulfilled, and more effective in our lives.
Areas of nurturance
As humans, we need to nurture ourselves in the following areas: 1)
physical, 2) psychological/emotional, 3) social, and 4) spiritual.
This means that we need to find waysto fulfill ourselves in each of
these aspects. Of course, these elements are interrelated and impact
upon each other. Islam is a religion of balance, wholeness, and
moderation. If we balance our lies in such a way as to take care of
each of our needs, we willexperience wholeness and serenity. We must
also do this in a way that is moderate and conscientious.
Case analysis
To get an idea of what all of this means, read through the following
cases and try to determine which area of nurturance is most needed in
each case. In other words, in which aspect is there imbalance or lack
of fulfillment? Focus on the weakest aspect in each case since more
than one may be represented.
Case 1: Maysoon
Maysoon is a young mother of a 4- month old infant. She and her
husband recently moved to the United Arab Emirates from America. The
baby was born in the UAE. Maysoon's husband works from 8:00 am until
6:00 pmeach day and Maysoon is alone in the house during that time
with the baby. She has no social contact and misses her family back
home. She comes from a large family of 6 siblings. Lately, she has
been feeling more and more depressed due to her situation. She cries
often and feels that she has no desire to take care of the baby. She
is not able to sleep at night and has no appetite. She wishes that
they had never come to this country.
Case 2: Maryam
Maryam is the mother of three small children––Zakariyyah, age 4;Salma,
age 2_; and Sumayyah, age9 months. Since the birth of her first baby,
Maryam has been concerned about her weight and figure. She gained 20
kilos with Zakariyyah, and although she lostsome of it over time,
others remained. With each pregnancy her weight only seemed to
increase. She feels tired and sluggish much of the time and does not
feel that she is able to fully give what she needs to her children.
Her husband has also commented on her weight and tells her that she
needs to get slim again like she was when she first married.
Case 3: Zainab
Zainab is a 35 year-old woman with 4 children and a full-time job as a
teacher. Her work and home responsibilities take much of her time, but
she somehow manages. Lately, Zainab has felt aspiritual distancing
from Allaah. She does not feel that she has thetime to strengthen her
relationship with Him. Her salah is often completed hurriedly and she
struggles to find sometime to read the Qur'an each day. Her desire is
to study more about Islam so that she can acquire more knowledge. This
would enable her to teach her children as well as the sisters in her
community. She wishes to come closer to Allaah, but the demandsof
daily life seem to be in the way.
Case 4: Reema
Reema is an energetic, educated, and intelligent woman. She works
full-time in a company as an accountant, but does not really enjoy her
work. She has been with the company for almost 5 years. She also has a
husband and two children—Yacoub, age 7 and Zainab, age 5. Although
Reema is very resourceful, she struggles with balancing the demands of
both work and home. Her time is spent go back and forth betweenthese
two demands. By the end of the
day, she feels emotionally drained and unfulfilled due to thestresses
of her job. She feels that she has no emotional energy left to give to
her family. She is concerned about how this will impact her children.
How do we nurture ourselves?
There is no right way or one perfect solution to nurturing the self.
Nurturing is specific to each person and each season of life. It is
personal and intimate. The ways that we are nurtured reflectour
deepest wants and needs. We begin by asking ourselves, "What feels
nurturing to me?" You can try to remember times inwhich you felt
nurtured arid loved and create a list of those times (or places or
people). Spend time writing in a journal about what feels nurturing to
you. To gather more ideas, ask friends what they do to nurture
themselves. Gradually, accumulate a list of events, people, and things
that feel nurturing.
To get some practice, go througheach of the scenarios above and try to
come up with ways that each of the women can nurture themselves. It
may be a good idea to do this with a friend or group of friends. The
outcome may surprise you.
The importance of spirituality
At the foundation of the human experience is spirituality. While all
elements are important and we attempt to balance them, the aspect that
cannot be eliminated or ignored is one's relationship with the
Creator. This will impact a person's life more than any other aspect.
The soul is at the center of the human being. Allaah Almighty Says
what means: "Then He fashioned him in due proportion and breathed into
him the soul (created by Allaah for that person) and made for you
hearing and vision and hearts (i.e., intellect); little are you
grateful. " [Quran 32: 9]
We also understand that our purpose in life is to worship Allaah
Almighty. Allaah Says whatmeans: "And I did not create the jinn and
mankind except to worship Me." [Quran 51:56]. It is through this
worship that we obtain the greatest fulfillment and nourishment
because it brings us closer to our Source. We find peace and
contentment simply in the remembrance of Allaah Almighty. Allaah Says
whatmeans: "Those who have believedand whose hearts are assured by the
remembrance of Allaah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allaah
hearts are assured." [Quran 3:28]
When we focus on nourishing our spirituality it will flow into the
other areas of our life. The guidelines that are provided by the
religion will become methodsof nurturance themselves. Maintaining the
ties of family is an example of nurturing the social aspect. Eating
healthy food is part of taking care of the physical self. When we
understand that the concept of worship in Islam is broad and includes
any actions that are acceptable to Allaah and done forHis sake, the
matter becomes clear. In the end, we begin to realize that nurturance
can be found in the hugs and care given to a child, in the completion
of a project for work, or even in the cooking of a dinner meal.
Remembrance of Allaah in all thatwe do will bring much of the
nurturance that we need in this

Salahtul Istikhara

The Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam has said:
"If one of you is concerned about some practical undertaking, or about
making plans for a journey, he should perform two Raka'aats (cycles)
of voluntary prayer." Thenhe should say the following Du'aa:
اللَّهمَّ إنِّي أستَخيرك بعلمكَ، و أستقدرك بقُدرتك، و أسْألك مِن فضلك العظيم،
فإنّك تَقْدر و لا أقْدِر، و تعلم و لا أعلم، و أنت علاَّمُ الغُيوب.
اللَّهمَّ إنْ كنتَ تعلم أنَّ هذا الأمْرِ خيرٌ لي في ديْني و معَاشي و عاقِبة أمري
– او قال عاجِل أمري و آجِله –
فاقْدِرْهُ لي و يسِّرْه لي ثمَّ بارِك لي فِيه،
و إن كنتَ تعلم أنَّ هذا الأمرِ شرٌّ لي في دِيني و معآشِي و عاقبةِ أمْرِي
– او قال في عاجِل أمرِي وآجِله –
فاصْرِفْه عَنِّي، و اصْرفْنِي عَنه، و اقْدِر لِيَ الخيْرَ حَيْثُ كان
ثُمَّ ارْضِنِي بِه.
Oh Allah! I seek Your guidance by virtue of Your knowledge, and I seek
ability by virtue ofYour power, and I ask You of Your great bounty.
You have power; I have none. And You know; I know not. You are the
Knower of hidden things.
Oh Allah! If in Your knowledge this matter is good for my religion,my
livelihood and my affairs, immediate and in the future, then ordain it
for me, make it easy for me, and bless it for me. And if inYour
knowledge this matter is bad for my religion, my livelihood and my
affairs, immediate and in the future, then turn it away from me, and
turn me away from it. And ordain for me the good wherever it may be,
and make me content with it.
Salatul Istikhara
We all turn to Allah during times when we are in need, and one ofthe
most common methods and reasons for turning to Him is to seek His
guidance through the Salaah of Istikhara.
Istikhara, in reality, means "to seek goodness from Allah" according
to some Ulamaa and according to some it is "to seek guidance from
Allah". Whichever meaning wetake, it is a prayer and supplication
which is made by a believer to His Lord to help him in the time of
need and confusion.
However, it is also a known fact that many people experience confusion
about this particular prayer. The main reason for the occurrence of
confusion is because the person who is offering this prayer is
expecting divine guidance from Allah Ta'ala and therefore has this
belief in this heart that whatever result and path he is shown to take
will be the correct path and the most beneficial path for him chosen
by Allah Himself.
However, when people offer this prayer, it is witnessed that the
confusion of a person is not removed. Furthermore, the path that one
appears to have been told to take is sometimes not a smooth and clear
path; instead, the person apparently faces more difficulty in taking
that path.
It is for this reason that it is vital to clear a few misconceptions
and furthermore present a wonderful insight of a great scholar from
the followers of Imaam Shafi'ee Rahimahullah.
First View
The first and most common view of Istikhara is that it is a prayer
through which one seeks the guidancefrom Allah Ta'ala. It is a prayer
that removes the confusion a person is experiencing in a matter he
wishes to undertake; be that matter should you marry this certain
person? Should you attend this graduate school? Should you take this
job offer or that one?
Therefore, the person who performs this prayer does so in orderto seek
guidance from Allah Ta'ala and hopes that his heart will be inclined
towards one of the two matters thusenlightening him as to what
decision to make.
However, as mentionedbefore, we sometimes see that we do not receive
any sort of inclination after the Istikhara, or that once the decision
is made we go through difficulties in the option we followed due to
the Istikhara.
Explanation
Primarily, it should be understood that, according to this view, we
are seeking Allah's complete knowledge toguide us and therefore we
should understand that whatever path we take is the right path for us
and no matter what apparent difficulties we go through there is some
benefit for us within this path that Allah has inclined our hearts
towards.
Furthermore, if we feel that there is no inclination towards a certain
matter then thescholars have mentioned that we should perform the
prayer several times until we do receive an answer from Allah Ta'ala.
Second View
Istikhara rather than being a prayer for guidance it is a supplication
(Du'aa) to Allah Ta'ala and a prayer to seek goodness from Him. It is
through this prayer that a person asks AllahTa'ala to put goodness in
whatever he decidesto do and a supplication to Allah asking Him to
guide him towards that in which there is goodness for him and keep him
away from that which has no goodness for him.
(The explanation of theImam that is given is very lengthy and takes a
great effort to explain. Alhumdulillah Iam in the process of
completing the translation of this article which I will post in the
near future, Insha Allah.)
In brief, the scholar mentions that if one is to believe that this
prayer is that of guidance that it deems necessary to believe that
Allah's guidance is always correct as He has complete knowledge.
However, we see many a times that the confusion still remains after
the prayer and therefore it means that the promisefrom Allah was not
fulfilled and through Istikhara one did not achieve what one was
promised; and it is impossible for Allah to command of somethingand
then not have that order achieve its results.
Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi recalls one pious saint from the Shafi'ee
group (which the author cannot recall) who mentioned an amazing
insight about Salaat-ul-Istikhara. Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanvi, after
mentioning this scholar's amazing explanation, says himself that he is
more inclined towards the Shafi'ee explanation of Istikhara and that
this is the more correct opinion.
Explanation
With this view if we take into account the above issues and confusion
that often occurs, the confusions still remaining and facing
difficulties in thepath the one took, we can say that Istikhara isa
Du'aa and all Dua'aas are accepted by Allah but it is not necessary
that it be in this world or immediately. Therefore, not receiving
clarification would mean that Allah has accepted our Dua'aas (as He
has promised to do so) but He has not answered it immediately, or that
Hewill give us a greater reward for this supplication in the
Hereafter.
Similarly, if we face difficulties in a chosen path it could have the
same explanation as above or that Allah will shortly give us goodness
in the matter we have chosen.
Benefits of this Second View
If one takes this secondview into account then one will be able to
make use of worldly means in able to make his decision and remove his
confusion regarding the matter. Istikhara will be a supplication from
Allah Ta'ala to help him in hisdecision and to give him goodness it
whatever he chooses todo, whilst taking aid from the mediums will help
resolve his confusion and assist him in making a decision.
Conclusion
We have been instructed by the Prophet Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam to
perform the Istikhara prayer whenever we make decisions in our life,
especially when we make some major decisions in life. Therefore, we
should always make an effort to perform this prayer of Istikhara,
whether we see it as a way in receiving guidance or whether we perform
it as a supplication.
Furthermore, we should always use the mediums that Allah has placed in
this world to aid us with removing our confusions. The world has been
referred to as "Darul Asbaab" (the place of mediums) and it is the
wisdom of Allah that in order to acquire anything or even receive
anything from Him we need to use themeans and mediums that Allah has
placed within this world.
Finally, we should always trust in the decisions that we take through
the guidance of Allah and those that we take after supplicating to
Him; Hismercy is infinite and though Allah may shower His mercy with
delay upon us, throughHis own wisdom, but He will surely guide us and
aid us through those matters that we have taken with hope of His help
and guidance. As the Prophet Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam advised us in
the final words of the Du'aa,"and make me content with it", we should
remain content with the decision we took with trust in Allah.
May Allah bless us with divine guidance from Himself and may He give
us the understanding to makethe correct decisions and may He put
goodness in whatever He chooses for us to do.

Introduction toMarriage

An Introduction
Marriage in the dictionary is explained as the name given to when a
man and a woman "formally unite for the purpose of living together".
In Islam, it is an act which is given great importance both from a
religious view point and a social viewpoint.
The subject of marriageis vast and contains many topics; these topics include:
01. If one chooses not to marry or is unable toget married.
02. When to get married.
03. Love marriages, arranged marriages and force marriages.
04. How to choose a suitable spouse.
05. How to get married.
06. Leading a happy, married life.
07. Rights & responsibilities of the husband.
08. Rights & responsibilities of the wife.
09. Etiquettes involved in a married life.
10. Upbringing of children.
11. Responsibilities towards one's children.
12. Marrying more thanone wife (*new*)
Marriage is an act which completes and encompasses the many teachings
of Islam. It has been thus narrated in a Hadeeth that whena person
marries, he has complete half of hisreligion and so he should fear
Allah regarding the remaining half.
Shame, modesty, moral and social values and control of self desire are
just a few of the many teachings of Islam. Furthermore, these are just
a few of the many worships thata person can complete by performing the
ritual of marriage. Through marriage a person can be saved from many
shameless and immoral sins and through marriage he has is more able to
control his desire. Therefore, the Prophet (Sallallahu Alayhi Wa
Sallam) has said:
"O young men! Whoever is able to marry should marry,
for that will help him tolower his gaze and guard his modesty."
[Saheeh al-Bukhari]
The creation of mankind has been made such that man requires a spouse
to complete all that a manrequires. Whilst Adam (Alayhis Salaam) was
in Jannah he felt a particular loneliness and in response to this
loneliness Allah Ta'ala created Hawa (Alayhas Salaam) as a companion
for him. This clearly shows that Allah chose women to act as a
companion for man and so that they can remove that loneliness and live
in harmony. Allah has created our spouses from a part of us. It is a
bond that is created by Allah Himself so that wecan find peace and
tranquillity within our spouses.
Allah has stated in Surah al-Rum:
"And among His signs isthat He has created for you mates from among yourselves,
that you may dwell in tranquillity with them;
and He has put love and mercy between you.
Verily in that are signs for those who reflect."
[Surah al-Rum - 30:21]
In conclusion, it is simple to deduce that marriage is a form of
worship as well as a social necessity. We have been asked to increase
the Ummah (followers) and the only permissible way inIslam is through
Marriage.
Marriage is a strong oath that takes place between the man and women
in this world, but its blessings and contract continues even in
Jannah.
Marriage is the way of our beloved Prophet (Sallallahu Alayhi Wa
Sallam), and whosoever goes against this practice has been
reprimanded.
Hadhrat Anas ibn Malik narrates:
A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet
asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were informed
about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said:
"Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven."
Then one of them said:"I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever."
The other said: "I will fast throughout the year and will not breakmy fast."
The third said: "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever."
Allah's Apostle came to them and said,
"Are you the same people who said so-and-so?
By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him than you;
yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women.
So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from
me(from my followers)."
[Saheeh al-Bukhari]
Therefore, Islamically, we are all encouraged to get married and not
turn away from the ways of our beloved Prophet (Sallallahu Alayhi Wa
Salaam).
It should be remembered that this duty of marriage is for both men and
women. Just as men complete half their religion through this act, it
is also the same for women.
Insha Allah, other topics will be discussed soon. If there are any
other topics under the topic of Nikaah/Marriage that you would like to
be discussed please leave

Qualities of Aisha and herrole in Islam

(Note: The name spelt in this article as Aisha is properly
transliterated as'Á'ishah)
Qualities of Aisha and herrole in Islam
In any discussion on the age of Aisha (ra: may Allah be pleased with
her) at the time of her marriage with the Holy Prophet Muhammad (may
peace and the blessings of Allah be upon him), it is of the greatest
relevance to note the pivotal role she played as a teacher, exponent
and interpreterof the religion of Islam. Aisha was an exceptionally
intelligent and astute woman, a young prodigy, and this was the main
reason whyshe was got married to the Holy Prophet, as is clearly
proved by events after the Holy Prophet's life. She entered his
household, shortly after his emigration to Madina,just at the time
when the teachings of Islam in all fields of life for the Muslim
community were starting to be revealed tothe Holy Prophet and
demonstrated by him by his example and practice.An intellectually
gifted person was required who would have daily contact with the Holy
Prophet at the closest and most personal level, so as to absorb the
teachings that he was giving on all aspects of life by his words and
actions. Such a person would need to possess the following qualities:
an excellent, precise memory to retain a vast amount of detail accurately,
the understanding to grasp the significance and the principles of the teachings,
powers of reasoning, criticism and deduction to resolve problems on
the basis of those teachings,
the skills to convey knowledge to a wide range of audience,
and, finally, have the prospect of living for a considerable period of
time after the death of the Holy Prophet in orderto spread his message
to distant generations.
That Aisha possessed all these qualities and carried out this mission
isan absolutely positive and undeniable, historical fact. After the
Holy Prophet's death, she acted as a teacher and interpreter of Islam,
providing guidance to even the greatest of the male Companions of the
Holy Prophet Muhammad.They made a special point of going to her to
gain knowledge and seek her opinion. A vast number of sayings and
actions of the Holy Prophet are reported from her in books of Hadith.
She not only quoted his sayings and reported her observations of
events, but interpreted them to provide solutions to questions.
Whenever necessary, she corrected the views of the greatest of the
Companions of the Holy Prophet. She made rulings and judgments onwhich
Islamic law is based.
The following are two examples of what the Holy Prophet's male
Companions said about her:
"Abu Musa said: Whenever there was any hadith that was difficult [to
understand] for us, the Companions of the Messenger of Allah, and we
asked Aisha we always found that she had knowledge about that hadith."
"Musa ibn Talha said: I never saw anyone more eloquent than Aisha." [1]
In the famous compilation of the lives of saints in Islam,
Tadhkirat-ul-Auliya, the author Farid-ud-Din Attar, who lived eight
centuries ago, introducesthe life of the early female saint Rabia of
Basra as follows:
"If anyone says, 'Why have you included Rabia in the rank of men?', my
answer is that the Prophet himself said, 'God does not regard your
outward forms'. … Moreover, if it is proper to derive two-thirds of
our religion from Aisha, surely it is permissible to take religious
instruction from a handmaid of Aisha." [2]
It is thus recognised, from the earliest times in Islam, that some
two-thirds of Islamic Sharia is based on reports and interpretations
that have come from Aisha.
In view of these exceptional qualities of Aisha and the towering role
played by her in the transmission of the teachings of Islam, it is
simply preposterous and outrageous to suggest that she was the victim
ofsome form of child and marital abuse. We ask in particular the
Christian and Jewish critics of Islam, who are reviling the Holy
Prophet Muhammad on the basis of his marriage with Aisha, whether they
can point out any example of a woman in their religions who played a
role like that of Aisha in learning the religion from its founder and
becoming the teacher and instructor of all his followers, including
men,after his death.
Age of Aisha at time of marriage with Holy Prophet Muhammad
It is believed on the authority of some Hadith reports that the
marriageceremony (known as nikah, amounting to betrothal) of Aisha
with the Holy Prophet Muhammad took place when she was six years of
age, and that she joined the Holy Prophet as his wife three years
later at the age of nine. We quote below from two such reports in
Bukhari.
"It is reported from Aisha that she said: The Prophet entered into
marriage with me when Iwas a girl of six … and at the time [of joining
his household] I was a girl ofnine years of age."
"Khadija died three yearsbefore the Prophet departed to Medina. He
stayed [alone] for two years or so. He married Aisha when she was a
girlof six years of age, and he consummated that marriage when she was
nine years old." [3]
As to the authenticity of these reports, it may be noted that the
compilers of the books of Hadith did not apply the same stringent
tests when accepting reports relating to historical matters as they
did before accepting reports relating to the practical teachings and
laws of Islam. The reason is that the former type of reportwas
regarded as merely of academic interest while the latter type of
report had a direct bearing on the practical duties of a Muslim and
onwhat was allowed to them and what was prohibited. Thus the
occurrence of reports such as the above about the marriage of Aisha in
books of Hadith, even in Bukhari, is not necessarily a proof of their
credibility.
Determination of the trueage of Aisha
It appears that Maulana Muhammad Ali was the first Islamic scholar
directly to challenge the notion that Aisha was aged six and nine,
respectively, at the time of her nikah and consummation of marriage.
This he did in, at least, the following writings: his English booklet
Prophet of Islam, his larger English book Muhammad, the Prophet,and in
the footnotes in his voluminous Urdu translation and commentary of
Sahih Bukhari entitled Fadl-ul-Bari, these three writingsbeing
published in the 1920s and 1930s. In the booklet Prophet of Islam,
which was later incorporated in 1948 as the first chapter of his book
Living Thoughts of the Prophet Muhammad, he writes in a lengthy
footnote as follows:
"A great misconception prevails as to the age at which Aisha was taken
inmarriage by the Prophet. Ibn Sa'd has stated in the Tabaqat that
when Abu Bakr [father of Aisha] was approached on behalf of the Holy
Prophet, he replied that the girl had already beenbetrothed to Jubair,
and that he would have to settle the matter first with him. This shows
thatAisha must have been approaching majority at the time. Again, the
Isaba, speaking of the Prophet's daughter Fatima, says that she was
born five years before the Call and was about five years older than
Aisha. This shows that Aisha must have been about ten years at the
time of her betrothal to the Prophet, and not six years as she is
generally supposed to be. This is further borne out by the fact that
Aisha herself is reported to have stated that when the chapter [of the
Holy Quran] entitled The Moon, the fifty-fourth chapter, was revealed,
she was a girl playing about and remembered certain verses then
revealed. Now the fifty-fourth chapter was undoubtedlyrevealed before
the sixth year of the Call. All these considerations point to but one
conclusion, viz., that Aisha could not havebeen less than ten years of
age at the time of her nikah, which was virtually only a betrothal.
And there is one report inthe Tabaqat that Aisha was nine years of age
at the time of nikah. Again it is a fact admitted on allhands that the
nikah of Aisha took place in the tenth year of the Call in the month
of Shawwal, while there is also preponderance of evidence as to the
consummation of her marriage taking place in the second year of Hijra
in the same month, which shows that full fiveyears had elapsed between
the nikah and the consummation. Hence there is not the least doubt
that Aisha was at least nine or ten years of age at the time of
betrothal, and fourteen or fifteen years at the time of marriage." [4]
(Bolding is mine.)
To facilitate understanding dates of these events, please note that it
was in the tenth year of the Call, i.e. the tenth year after the Holy
Prophet Muhammad received his calling from God to his mission of
prophethood, that his wife Khadija passed away, and the approach was
made to Abu Bakr for the hand of his daughter Aisha. The hijra or
emigration of the HolyProphet to Madina took place three years later,
and Aisha came to the household of the Holy Prophet in the second year
after hijra. So if Aisha was born in the year of the Call, she would
be ten years old atthe time of the nikah andfifteen years old at the
time of the consummation of the marriage.
Later research
Research subsequent to the time of Maulana Muhammad Ali has shown that
she was olderthan this. An excellent short work presenting such
evidence is the Urdupamphlet Rukhsati kai waqt Sayyida Aisha Siddiqa
ki umar ('The ageof Lady Aisha at the time of the start of her married
life') by Abu Tahir Irfani.[4a] Points 1 to 3 below have been brought
to light in this pamphlet.
1. The famous classical historian of Islam, Ibn Jarir Tabari, wrote in
his 'History':
"In the time before Islam,Abu Bakr married two women. The first was
Fatila daughter of Abdul Uzza, from whom Abdullah and Asma were born.
Then he married Umm Ruman, from whomAbdur Rahman and Aisha were born.
These four were born before Islam." [5]
Being born before Islam means being born beforethe Call.
2. The compiler of the famous Hadith collection Mishkat al-Masabih,
ImamWali-ud-Din Muhammad ibn Abdullah Al-Khatib, who died 700 years
ago, has also written brief biographical notes on the narrators of
Hadith reports. He writes under Asma, the older daughterof Abu Bakr:
"She was the sister of Aisha Siddiqa, wife of theHoly Prophet, and was
ten years older than her.… In 73 A.H. … Asma died at the age of one
hundred years." [6]
(Go here to see an image of the full entry in Urdu.)
This would make Asma 28years of age in 1 A.H., the year of the Hijra,
thus making Aisha 18 years old in 1 A.H. So Aisha would be 19 years
old at the time of the consummation of her marriage, and 14 or 15
years old at the time of her nikah. It would place her year of birth
at four or five years before the Call.
3. The same statement is made by the famous classical commentator of
the Holy Quran, Ibn Kathir, in his book Al-bidayya wal-nihaya:
"Asma died in 73 A.H. at the age of one hundred years. She was ten
years older than her sister Aisha." [7]
Apart from these three evidences, which are presented in the Urdu
pamphlet referred to above, we also note that the birth of Aisha being
alittle before the Call is consistent with the opening words of a
statement by her which isrecorded four times in Bukhari. Those words
areas follows:
"Ever since I can remember (or understand things) my parents were
following the religion of Islam." [8]
This is tantamount to saying that she was born sometime before her
parents accepted Islam but she can only remember them practising
Islam. No doubt she and her parents knew well whether she was born
before or after they accepted Islam, as their acceptance of Islam was
such a landmark event in their life which took place just after the
Holy Prophet received his mission from God. If she had been born after
they accepted Islam it would make no sense for her to say that she
always remembered them as following Islam. Only if she was born before
theyaccepted Islam, would it make sense for her to saythat she can
only remember them being Muslims, as she was too young to remember
things before their conversion. This is consistent with her beingborn
before the Call, and being perhaps four or five years old at the time
of the Call, which was also almost the time when her parents accepted
Islam.
Two further evidences cited by Maulana Muhammad Ali
In the footnotes of his Urdu translation and commentary of Sahih
Bukhari, entitled Fadl-ul-Bari, Maulana Muhammad Ali had pointed out
reports of two events which show that Aisha could not havebeen born
later than the year of the Call. These areas follows.
1. The above mentioned statement by Aisha in Bukhari, about her
earliest memory of her parents being that they were followers of
Islam, begins with the following words in its version in Bukhari's
Kitab-ul-Kafalat. We quote this from the English translation of
Bukhari by M. Muhsin Khan:
"Since I reached the age when I could remember things, I have seen my
parents worshipping according to the right faith of Islam. Not a
single day passed but Allah's Apostle visited us both in the morning
and in the evening. When theMuslims were persecuted,Abu Bakr set out
for Ethiopia as an emigrant."[9]
Commenting on this report, Maulana Muhammad Ali writes:
"This report sheds some light on the question of the age of Aisha. …
The mention of the persecution of Muslims along with the emigration to
Ethiopia clearly shows that this refers to the fifth or the sixth year
of the Call. … Atthat time Aisha was of an age to discern things, and
so her birth could not have been later than the first year of the
Call." [10]
Again, this would make her more than fourteen at the time of the
consummation of her marriage.
2. There is a report in Sahih Bukhari as follows:
"On the day (of the battle) of Uhud when (some) people retreated and
left the Prophet, I saw Aisha daughter of Abu Bakr and Umm Sulaim,
with their robes tucked up so that the bangles around their ankles
were visible hurrying with their water skins (in another narration it
is said, 'carrying the water skins on their backs'). Then they would
pour the water in the mouths of the people, and return tofill the
water skins again and came back again to pour water in the mouthsof
the people." [11]
Maulana Muhammad Ali writes in a footnote under this report:
"It should also be noted that Aisha joined the HolyProphet's household
onlyone year before the battle of Uhud. Accordingto the common view
she would be only ten years of age at this time, whichis certainly not
a suitable age for the work she did on this occasion. This alsoshows
that she was not so young at this time." [12]
If, as shown in the previous section above, Aisha was nineteen at
thetime of the consummation of her marriage, then she would be twenty
years old at the time of the battle of Uhud. It may be added that on
the earlier occasion of the battle of Badr when some Muslim youths
tried, out of eagerness, to go along with the Muslim army to the field
of battle, the Holy Prophet Muhammad sent them back on account of
their young age (allowing only one such youngster, Umair ibn Abi
Waqqas, to accompany his older brother the famous Companion Sa'd ibn
Abi Waqqas). It seems, therefore, highly unlikelythat if Aisha was ten
years old the Holy Prophet would have allowed her to accompany the
army to the field of battle.
We conclude from all the evidence cited above that Aisha (may Allah be
pleased with her) was nineteen years old when she joined the Holy
Prophet as his wife in theyear 2 A.H., the nikah or betrothal having
taken place five years previously.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Bible on marriage of young girls with much older men
As it is Christian evangelists and other believers in the Bible who
have been bitterly reviling the Holy Prophet Muhammad on account of
his marriage with Aisha, we put to them thepractices of the great
patriarchs and prophets that are recorded in the Bible itself in this
connection. The main accusations regarding the marriage of Aisha
arethat she was too young in age while the Holy Prophet was a much
older man, being fifty years of age, and that consent to marriage was
either not obtained from her or she was not capable of giving it.
Abraham
In the book of Genesis in the Bible it is recorded about Abraham:
"Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children. But she had an
Egyptian maidservant named Hagar; so she saidto Abram, 'The Lord has
kept me from having children. Go, sleep with my maidservant; perhaps I
can build a family through her.' Abram agreed to what Sarai said. So
after Abram had been living in Canaan tenyears, Sarai his wife took
her Egyptian maidservantHagar and gave her to her husband to be his
wife. He slept with Hagar,and she conceived. … So Hagar bore Abram a
son, and Abram gave the name Ishmael to the son she had borne. Abram
was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore him Ishmael." (Genesis,
chapter 16, verses 1–4, and 15–16, New International Version. Bolding
is mine.)
Firstly, it is evident that as Abraham (who then had the name Abram)
was 86 years old, Hagar must have been some fifty years younger than
him, and probably even younger, to bear a child. Secondly, the Bible
speaks of Sarai giving her maidservant Hagar toAbraham. So Hagar's
consent was not obtained but rather she was commanded by Saraito go
and become Abraham's wife.
David
The first book of Kings in the Bible begins as follows:
"When King David was old and well advanced in years, he could not keep
warm even when they put covers over him. So his servants said to him,
'Let us look for a young virgin to attend the king and take care of
him. Shecan lie beside him so thatour lord the king may keep warm.'
Then they searched throughout Israel for a beautiful girl and found
Abishag, a Shunammite, and brought her to the king. The girl was very
beautiful; she took care of the king and waited on him, but the king
had no intimate relations with her." (1 Kings, chapter 1, verses 1–4,
New International Version. Bolding is mine.)
So there seems nothing wrong, according to the Bible, in procuring a
young virgin, again apparently without her consent, whose duties
include lying with the elderly king in bed. The intention was
certainly for sexual enjoyment, otherwise there was no necessity of
looking for a young, beautiful virgin. Amuch older woman, perhaps a
widow, could have performed all these duties, including lying with the
king to keep him warm.
Mary and Joseph
The most famous marriage in Christianity isno doubt that of Mary,
Jesus' mother, with Joseph. While the following details are not in the
canonical Gospels in the Bible, it appears from other early
Christianwritings (known as apocryphal writings) thatMary was twelve
years old when the temple elders decided to find a husband for her.
They selected the husband by drawing lots, and Joseph whom they chose
was an elderly man, being according to some accounts ninety years old.
The husband was selected and Mary was handed over to him, and she
played no part in his selection.
These accounts are summed up in the Catholic Encyclopedia, 1913
edition, which is available online, as follows:
"It will not be without interest to recall here, unreliable though
they are, the lengthy stories concerning St. Joseph's marriage
contained in the apocryphal writings. When forty years of age, Joseph
married a womancalled Melcha or Escha by some, Salome by others; they
lived forty-nine years together and had six children … A year afterhis
wife's death, as the priests announced through Judea that they wished
to find in the tribe of Juda a respectable man to espouse Mary, then
twelve to fourteen years of age, Joseph, who was at the time ninety
years old, went up to Jerusalemamong the candidates; a miracle
manifested the choice God had made of Joseph …" [13] (Bolding ismine.)
Although these apocryphal accounts are not now accepted by many
Christians, and the Catholic Encyclopedia says that they "are void of
authority", yet it also speaks of their influence as follows:
"they nevertheless acquired in the course of ages some popularity; in
them some ecclesiastical writers sought the answer to the well-known
difficulty arising from the mention in the Gospel of the Lord's
brothers; from them also popular credulity has, contrary to all
probability, as well as to the tradition witnessed by old works of
art, retained the beliefthat St. Joseph was an oldman at the time of
marriage with the Mother of God."
However, these accounts are accepted by the Eastern churches. The
website of the Ukrainian Orthodoxy has an article on this subject
entitled An Elderly Joseph which agrees with the presentation in the
apocryphal writings "of Joseph as an elderly man,a widower with adult
children". It concludes:
"The Christian East's picture of Joseph as a courageous, faithful,
God-centred elderly widower rings true." [14]
We give below, as Appendix, a quotation from one of these apocryphal
books, The Infancy Gospel of James, describing how Mary's husband was
selected.
While the Western Christian churches may not accept these accountsas
authentic, the Eastern churches in Europe do accept that Mary was 12
years old and Joseph a widower 90 years old when they married.
Moreover, there is nothing in the Gospels of the New Testament to
contradict these accounts, and the Gospel stories are not at all
inconsistent with these ages for Mary and Joseph.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
References
[1]. Tirmidhi, Abwab-ul-Manaqib, i.e. Chapters on Excellences, under
'Virtues of Aisha'.
[2]. Muslim Saints and Mystics, abridged English translation of
Tadhkirat-ul-Auliya, by A.J. Arberry, p. 40.
[3]. Bukhari, Book of Qualities of the Ansar, chapter: 'The Holy
Prophet's marriage with Aisha, and his coming to Madina and the
consummation of marriage with her'. For Muhsin Khan's translation, see
this link and go down to reports listed as Volume 5, Book 58, Number
234 and 236.
[4]. Living Thoughts of the Prophet Muhammad, 1992 U.S.A. edition, p.
30, note 40.
[4a]. This Urdu pamphlet was published by the Ahmadiyya Anjuman
Isha'at Islam, Bombay, India. A partial English translation is
available at this Lahore Ahmadiyya website.
[5]. Tarikh Tabari, vol. 4, p. 50.
[6]. Mishkat al-Masabih, Edition with Urdu translation published in
Lahore, 1986, vol. 3, p. 300–301. (Go here to see an image of the full
entryin Urdu.)
[7]. Vol. 8, p. 346.
[8]. Those four places in Sahih Bukhari are the following:
Kitab-us-Salat, ch. 'A mosque which is in the way but does not
inconvenience people'; Kitab-ul-Kafalat, ch. 'Abu Bakr under the
protection of a non-Muslim in the time ofthe Holy Prophet and his pact
with him'; Kitab Manaqib-ul-Ansar, ch. 'Emigration of the Holy Prophet
and his Companions to Madina'; and Kitab-ul-Adab, ch. 'Should a person
visit everyday, or morning and evening'.
[9]. Muhsin Khan's Englishtranslation of Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 37,
Number 494. See this link.
[10]. Fadl-ul-Bari, vol. 1, p. 501, footnote 1.
[11]. Sahih Bukhari, Kitab-ul-Jihad wal-Siyar, Chapter: 'Women in war
and their fighting alongside men'. See this link in Muhsin Khan's
translation and go down to report listed as Volume4, Book 52, Number
131.
[12]. Fadl-ul-Bari, vol. 1, p. 651.
[13]. In article St. Joseph, under letter J. Here is a link to this
article in the online Catholic Encyclopedia.
[14]. Here is a link to this article An Elderly Joseph.

Munkar Ma'roof (Evil and Good)

Munkar Ma'roof (Evil and Good)
By Maulana I. Suleman
Assalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu.
Respected guests, elders, brothers and sisters:
Today, I would like to present an analysis of what is going on in this
world today. From the corners of the world, people are either
complaining about materialism--that they do not have enough of it;
complaining about their children, complaining about the people in
power, complaining about thisor complaining about that. We are
becoming a community of complainers and we are sitting in peace
complaining about thisperson or that person. Every single one of us,
when we are in salah, we do not finish that prayer until we say:
Allahummah inni dhalamtu nafsi dhulman katheera. "OhAllah, the
complain is that about the MIS or MIB or Scotland yard orthe IRS. The
complain is, Oh Lord, I have wronged myself," but straight after
salaam something magic happens that we start talking about other
people. There are two different pictures coming along. On one hand, we
acknowledgein front of our Creator that me, I, myself am toblame, but
when we go outside of salah, westart talking about somebody else. This
is not the teaching of Islam.
What is the game of the day today? The game of the day today is to
change people's minds--how they thinkand how they behave. These
advertising campaigns are no joke.The people who work for these
advertising companies have a Ph.D. in psychology. Psychology is the
art where you learn how to control a person's mind and you see this
coming into play whenwe look at the advertisements. Why does a child,
when they pass McDonald's or Burger King with their father say, "Dad,
I want McDonald's or Burger King. I want a haram burger." Why
everytime do we see a new gadget coming out and Christmas or birthdays
or Father's Day or whatever is coming up and the child sees
advertisements being played and all of a sudden the child comes up and
says,"Dad I want that!" Where do they get this idea from? The
essenceof the ages that many people just fail to understand is what
exactly is going on in this day and age.
Allama Tabrani narrates a hadith in hismu'jam. The Prophet (sallallahu
alaiyhi wa sallam) said to his companions who wereassembled in a
gathering like you people are assembled over here: "What will be your
situation, whatwill be the framework of your mind when a good thing,
when ma'roof will become munkar (evil)?" Evil will become good.
Roguishness will become righteousness.Falsehood will becomerighthood.
Lies will become good. The Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wa sallam) told
us about this age that was going to come. Munkar, deviation,
evil,falsehood, vanity, will become good. Just to give you one
example, in 1999 in the UK, there was a decision made in the House of
Lords that there was a couple, well they calledthemselves a couple of
gay orientation and these two males lived together for 20 years in a
council owned house. One of them died. According to British law and
council tenancy law, your family has the right to occupy that council
property after the person whose name it is in has passed away. So this
person, who called the deceased hispartner, took this case to court
claiming, "The council cannot evict me from my house. Why? Because he
was my family." To cut the long story short, this case went to the
Houseof Lords, the biggest judition. Eventually thecase was decided
that yes, this person is fromhis family and yes, this person has the
right to stay in this council house. For us, the decision is
unimportant, but look at what is happening in this world today.
Ma'roof (good) has become munkar (evil) and munkar has become ma'roof,
evil has become good. A gay person has been established as a family
member. This is what the Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wa sallam)
saidover 1400 years ago:"What will your situation be when ma'roof will
become munkar and munkar becomes ma'roof?" This is the exact scenario
we find ourselves in today. Thecompanions of the Prophet (sallallahu
alaiyhi wa sallam) asked: "Will this actually take place in the
world?" The Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wa sallam) said, "More than
this will take place. Not only will good become bad and bad will
become good, more than this will happen." The companions of the
Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wa sallam) asked, "What will this be?" The
Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wa sallam) said, "You will order people to
do wrong and you will stop them from doing good." My dear respected
brothers andsisters, if we look at the world today, is thisnot the
case? People are accepting Haqq (truth) as Baatil (falsehood) and
Baatil as Haqq, roguishness for righthood, vanity for truth. This is
the scenario of the world today, but the fact of the matter remains
that see the concepts of life change as periods go.
In the 20th century, wehave entertained manydiscoveries. There is a
book named Visions: How Science Will Revolutionize the 21st century.
It talks about what role science will play in our lives,
wherescientist are going towards. In it are opinions of 150 great
authorities on science in this day and age published by the Oxford
University Press. In this book, it states that between 1990 and 2000,
no other period has entertained extra scientific knowledge that what
we have been discovering for 500 years according to western theory and
Muslims were well intoit before all this.
All these discoveries took place in the last 10 years because of 3
main discoveries.
The first is the Quantum Theory. This theory is based on mankind being
able to split the atom. Once he split the atom, he now had knowledge
and power over matter. What is matter? Matteris anything you can
touch. This bench is matter. This tape recorder is matter. Because of
this discovery, we have TV, digital TV, DVD technology, where you can,
at a press of a button of a remote, select any angle. All this was a
direct result of the Quantum Theory.
The second revolution in the 20th century was the biomolecular
revolution or the DNA. Anyone who has been arrested will know that in
certain cases the police takes a DNA swab. A swab of saliva from the
inside of yourmouth and they use that and keep it on record to
identify a person and as a result of this DNA revolution, mankind was
able to have control over the human being. Now he can claim that 'I
have the intelligence to create a bionic man. I have the intelligence
to give that father any kind of son he wants. I have the intelligence
to give that woman any kind of baby she wants whether she wants a
clever one, an intelligent one, a blue-eyed one, a green-eyed one, or
a dumb one. Because mankind has masteredthe biomolecular revolution
and this is what it says in the book, Visions, that now scientists are
at an astounding position.
The third revolution of the 20th century is the computer revolution
and the computer revolution is that revolution with which mankind
believes he isable to play God. This isone idea of the computer
revolution.
Those who have a bank account, will most probably have a service tip
card (ATM). There will be a pin number on it which nobody has in the
world. It must need some brains for somebody to come up with this idea
that no one has the same pin number, but now its moving on. Barclays'
Bank is introducing another system which is already prevalent in
London. Allah, in your eye, has made a part called the iris. In that
part, Allah has created seventy different features from one eye and
the other eye has seventy different features. Next time yougo to
Barclays' Bank, you will not need your card, you will not need a pin
number. It will recognize you from thefeatures of your eyes. Allah
says in the Qur'an: "And in yourself, do you not see there are signs?"
Mankind is now discovering this. This is Allah's unlimited power,
which we wereunaware of and today it is coming in front of our eyes.
So these three revolutions, the Quantum Revolution, the Biomolecular
Revolution, and the Computer Revolution, mankind has mastered. Now he
is saying, "Now, I can play God. I'm going to be Allah. I'm going to
decide who is going to have what kind of child."
Islam is not against any progress. Muslims were conquering astronomy
in the sky at a time when it was innovation to look at the skies in
different religions. The scientists say that there will not be any
more major discoveries after these three main discoveries.
The hadith that I statedearly on, you tell me, when mankind thinks
that he is becoming God, is that not batil and munkar? Do we not find
an example in the Qur'an when Namrood said the same thing: I am God.
Is there not an example of Pharaoh, who claimed to be Allah, God?
Mankind is losing his goal in life as a result, many Muslims, educated
or uneducated. The sole purpose and function and role of a human being
in his life has been totally forgotten. We are failing to understand
our function in life. As one poet says: "I have many different
passions in life." One ofthe signs of Qiyaamah is that people will
havedifferent hobbies (to stray them away from the remembrance of
Allah), as Allama Tabrani narrated. I willgive you a real life example
of it, which is that when you walk in to any shop where they sell
magazines and you look at the topshelf to the bottom shelf, whatever
topic you want--hunting, computing, pornography or this or that, you
will find it there. We have this in our minds that people actually buy
this? If people didn't buy themthey would not produce them. So, one of
the signs of the Day of Judgement is that people will have different
passions. People will become busy in sports and computing and in
theirother hobbies that nobody will be aware of where this will lead
and the poet says: "I have different passions. All my different
passions and interests and hobbies became one from that moment when I
realized my central passion in life and that was Allah and those
people who I envied." because they have these new Mercedes with the
computerizeddashboards and posh mobile phones and these big houses
with a press of a button the gates open and like BillGates' house when
he leaves his house in Seattle, he can control the temperature of his
house miles away--people envy this type of person in the modern day
and age. This poets says, "that those people who I envied because they
have this (money) this time they are becoming jealous of me. Why?
Because I have found Allah in my life. I became a liberated slave of
mankind from that moment when I recognized Allah."
The new discoveries are having an affect on the human beings, so much
so that the knowledge in this day and age is taking mankind in the
direction of forgetting Allah. I have explained to you the progress in
this day.
Now, in a nutshell, I would like to point outthe consequences of the
discoveries that have taken place. I would like to take only one area
of this, which are the wars. If you look at the history of the 20th
century from 1900-1915 there was awar called the British Colonial War.
From 1914 to 1919 there was the first World War where one
millionpeople died. From 1921, for some years there was a war against
England and Ireland. From 1939 to about 1945 the secondWorld War took
place where fifty million people lost their lives. From 1956 to 1962
we had the colonial fighters in Africa, Angola, Tunisia, and Algeria
and today we have Chechnya, we have Bosnia, we have Afghanistan and
Russia and a whole host of other countries.Eighty percent of the time,
in the 20th century, mankind has been fighting with each other. What
is theprogress here, I ask you? We claim, on the one hand, that this
is the century of progress, but four-fifths of the time, mankind has
been fighting with each other. What kind of progress is that? We
cannot even learn to live with each other, soin this day and age there
is no doubt that we have progress, but where has the progress taken
us? Have we actually learned to live as human beings on the face of
this earth? The human being is no longer worthy of beingcalled a
human. Why? Because he does not recognize his Lord anymore.
It is necessary upon you to make sure that you look after soul. Why?
Because you are a human being by the mere fact that you have a soul
inside you and not by the fact thatyou have a body.
As a poet says:
The world would like to change you
There are pressures all around
You must decide just who you are
Then firmly hold your ground
So be yourself and don't allow the world to take control
Preserving your identity (as a Muslim) is life's most precious goal.
Wa akhirudda'wana anil humdulillahi rabbil alameen.

Surat an-Nisa, 77 (Hypocrites are opposed to intellectual struggle)

Do you not see those who were told: 'Hold back from fighting but
establish salat and pay alms? Then when fighting is prescribed
forthem, a group of them fear people as Allah should be feared, or
even more than that. They say, 'OUR LORD , WHY HAVE YOU PRESCRIBED
FIGHTING FOR US? IF ONLY YOU WOULD GIVE US JUST A LITTLE MORE TIME!'
Say, 'The enjoyment of the world is very brief. The Hereafter is
better for those who have fear of Allah. You will not be wronged by so
much as the smallest speck.' (Surat an-Nisa', 77)

Do you not see the main point that distinguishes the hypocrites? They
are opposed to Islamic Union and jihad (the intellectual struggle).
They do not want the deen of Allah to spread and rule the world. They
pray and fast and everything. They even ask for more. For instance, if
an animal is to be sacrificed they request further detail. But talk of
Islamic Union offends them, and that isthe problem they have.

Complexity of RNA Molecules Refutes Evolutionist Claims

Probabilistic calculationsmake it clear that complex molecules such as
proteins and nucleic acids (RNA and DNA) could not ever have been
formed by chance independently of each other . Yet evolutionists have
to face the even greater problem that all these complex moleculeshave
to coexist simultaneously in order for life to exist at all .
Evolutionary theory is utterly confounded by this requirement. This is
a point on which some leading evolutionists have been forced to
confession. For instance, Stanley Miller's and Francis Crick's close
associate from the University of San Diego California, reputable
evolutionist Dr. Leslie Orgel says :
It is extremely improbable that proteins and nucleic acids, both of
which are structurally complex, arose spontaneously in the same place
at the same time. Yet it also seems impossible to have one without the
other. And so, at first glance, one might have to conclude that life
could never, in fact, haveoriginated by chemical means . 1
The same fact is also admitted by other scientists:
John Horgan, "In the Beginning", Scientific American, vol. 264,
February 1991, p. 119
DNA cannot do its work, including forming more DNA, without the help
of catalytic proteins, or enzymes. In short, proteins cannot form
without DNA, but neithercan DNA form without proteins . 2
Douglas R. Hofstadter, Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid,
New York, Vintage Books, 1980, p. 548
How did the Genetic Code, along with the mechanisms for its
translation (ribosomes and RNAmolecules), originate ? For the moment,
we will have tocontent ourselves with a sense of wonder and awe,
rather than with ananswer. 3

Ideal character of Muslim women

In the Qur'an, Allah informs us how belief benefits a woman:
Do not marry women who associate [others with Allah] until they
believe. A slave girl who is one of the believers is better for you
than a woman who associates [others with Allah], even though she may
attract you. And do not marry men who associate [others with Allah]
until they believe. A slave whois one of the believers is better for
you than a man who associates [others with Allah], even though he may
attract you. Such people call you to the Fire, whereas Allah calls
you, with His permission, to the Garden and forgiveness. He makes His
Signs clear to people so that, hopefully, they will pay heed. (Surat
al-Baqara: 221)
Allah reveals that belief, fear and respect of Allah,and Islamic
morality are the foremost causes of the believers' strength
ofcharacter and virtue. Belief makes all of a person's qualities
meaningful. In addition, the Qur'an's morality helps women, and
everyone else, to acquirea most strong, solid, and virtuous character.
As Allah revealed in the verse, "No indeed! We have given them that by
which they are remembered [i.e. their honor, eminence and dignity]"
(Surat al-Mu'minun: 71), this morality gives people their dignity and
honor. Therefore, women who live by this morality will be respected
and enjoy their deserved honor and dignity.
As we mentioned earlier,Allah has not determinedseparate characters
for men and women and therefore calls on all people to abide by one
Muslim character. Therefore, Muslims fear and respect Allah, seek His
good pleasure, and seek only to win the Hereafter, in the full
knowledge that this worldly life is temporary and that he or she will
die one day.
Muslim Women Submit to God:
Muslim women believe in Allah with a true heart, submit completelyto
Him, are aware that there is no other deity, that He is the Lord of
every being and thing, and that He is All-Powerful. Therefore, she
fears and respects only Him and seeks to win only His good pleasure.
She worships only Him, accepts only Him as her closest friend,and
seeks only His help. She also knows that onlyHe can direct good and
bad toward her, and so lives in the full knowledge that she is
dependent on Him. She knows that He keeps heralive, provides and
caresfor her, and protects andguards her. For these reasons, she has
no expectations of other people.
She believes in Allah without the slightest doubt in her heart for her
whole life, never losing heart or belief regardless of the
circumstances. She knows how to be grateful and content with her
closeness to Him both when her life is good and when she is undergoing
difficulties. She is in a state of constant submission, certain of our
Lord's love, compassion, forgiveness, and providence.
When she encounters a problem, she knows thatAllah has provided a
solution in the Qur'an, and that what matters most is her continued
sincere love, submission,and trust in Allah. She is certain of Allah's
promise that He creates everything according to His justice and with
wisdom and goodness.
Even if her problems seem to go on forever, she never surrenders to
hopelessness or worries when His help will come.Content with what He
has sent her way, she maintains her patience and submission, knowing
that somethinggood will come out of it. She remembers what theQur'an
says about those who abandon their belief in such times. In addition,
she recites "My Lord is with me and will guide me" (Surat
ash-Shu'ara': 62), just as the Prophets did when faced with hardship.
Throughout her life, her profound faith enables her to see Allah's
compassion, closeness, love, help, and friendship at all times.
This superior character becomes even more distinctive when compared
with that of unbelieving women. Some unbelieving women do not show the
appropriate degree of submission in their encounters, because they
ignore the fact that Allah creates everything and inserts much wisdom
and goodness hidden therein. One of the best-known characteristics of
such women is their impatience, lack of determination, panic, and
throwing tantrums when experiencing various hardships.
For this reason, and to save themselves the hassle, men often try to
keep women away from potentially troublesome situations. Movies and
novels are full of such stories. Since they do notplace their trust in
Allah and do not submit to Him, they cannot find the patience and
resolution to endure hard times. In fact, their strength is in direct
proportion to the size of the gain they can expect from working
through these difficulties.
Believing women derive their strength from theirbelief and their
determination to win Allah's good pleasure. Therefore, their
resistance can be quite powerful. The Qur'an reveals this truth in the
following verse: "Allah's guidance, that is true guidance. We are
commanded to submit asMuslims to the Lord of allthe worlds" (Surat
al-An'am: 71). Allah givesgood news to those whosubmit to Him:
Those who submit themselves completely toAllah and do good have
grasped the Firmest Handhold. The end resultof all affairs is with
Allah.(Surah Luqman: 22)
Not so! All who submit themselves completely toAllah and are
good-doers will find their reward with their Lord. They will feel no
fear and will know no sorrow. (Surat al-Baqara:112)
Muslim Women Have Great Ideals:
One of the unbelievers' most misguided character traits is the
restrictions that they placed on people's ideals, thoughts, and
lifestyle. In the case of women, society tells them that they have
certain duties and responsibilities that theyare expected to fulfill
to the best of their ability. Usually, they are not encouraged to
acquire different ideals or develop their personalities. Only when
women become aware of this reality do they begin to perceive the need
to seek greater ideals, widen their horizon, and develop their
personalities.
rimarily, women are expected to provide for and cater to their
families' needs and raisetheir children. Otherwise, they focus
onthemselves, according tothe conditioning they received when young.
They concentrate on their physical appearance, hair style, make-up,
clothing and fashion in general; keeping their homes clean; and
talking with their friends. While there is nothing wrong with such
activities, it is wrong to limit their livesjust to these tasks
without even knowing why this is so.
Allah created men and women for a purpose and revealed their
responsibilities in the Qur'an. Most importantly, each woman is
responsible to our Lord, for He created her, gave her life, protected
and watched over her, and provided for her. Men and womenare required
to lead the moral life prescribed by Allah, worship and serve Him, and
to win His goodpleasure. They are required to tell people who are far
from the happy and contented life of following the Qur'an's values
about Islam's values and to make a genuine effort tohelp them draw
closer toAllah's pleasure, mercy, and Paradise. They must strive to
save people from negative frames of mind, and from suffering under the
influence of the chaos and disorder, all of which are presented by
Satan and thus are devoid of true love, respect, and friendship.
All believers are obliged to help and guide those who are weak and
distressed to His path:
What reason could you have for not fighting in the Way of Allah-for
those men, women, and children who are oppressed and say: "Our Lord,
take us out of this city whose inhabitants are wrongdoers! Give us a
protector from You! Give us a helper from You!?" (Surat an-Nisa': 75)
Allah further reminds Muslims that they are obliged to assist orphans,
people who are stranded, and other needy people:
Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him. Be good to your
parents and relatives, orphans and the very poor, neighborswho are
related to you and neighbors who are not related to you, and
companions, travelers, and your servants. Allah does not love anyone
vain or boastful. (Surat an-Nisa': 36)
A Muslim woman is aware of all these responsibilities and so does not
focus only on herself. Rather, she does her best to solve the problems
around the world, such as helping people who are suffering, fighting
infectious diseases, working with children displaced or orphaned by
war and conflict, and taking care of the elderly and other women as if
they were her own problems.
She gives her full attention to every matter in her daily life,
because she knows that the truly important thingis to win Allah's good
pleasure, live the Qur'an's morality, and spread this morality in
order to bring true contentment and happiness to all others. For this
reason, she acts in the knowledge that what she encounters each day is
not so important when put intothe overall context of what she was
created to do.
Muslim Women Are Dignified:
... And the soul and whatproportioned and inspired it with depravity
or heedfulness; he who purifies it has succeeded, he who covers it up
has failed. (Surat ash-Shams: 7-10)
The above verses warn people about the selfish ego that, when not
brought under control, will lead them to limitless evil. A person's
fear and respect of Allah,as well as his or her belief in the
Hereafter, gives each person the strength and reason to resist these
temptations.
Without this awareness, people will follow their desires and not worry
about their meeting with Allah in the Hereafter, where they will be
held accountable for their deeds. If his ego demands anger, jealousy,
or ill-treatmentof someone else, he will indulge it. If her selfish
ego encourages her to vent her anger or jealous frustration with
insinuations, mockery, slander, lies, conspiracies, or hypocritical
behavior, she will oblige it withoutgiving it a second thought. Such
people will commit all of these sins without reservation,because they
believe that they will never haveto account for their deeds.
Allah, however, reveals that all of these activitiesare unconstrained
evils called for by the selfish ego. When people act onthese impulses,
things just get worse. People who cannot control theiremotions, even
when they know that what they are doing is wrong,show that they are
both weak and ignore their conscience. In other words, they seem to
grow smaller. It is debasing to be unable toact maturely or respond
rationally when their selfish egos suggest otherwise. As Allah
reveals, the dignifying and rightful response to such evil suggestions
is to ignore them and act conscientiously. This character trait needs
to be worked on, for eventually it will earn other people's respect
and love and raise the person's ranks in His eyes, as well as in the
eyes of other people.
Muslim women have enough dignity and character to reject such debasing
behavior for small gains. Allah informs us of the conspiring nature of
unbelieving women: "Hesaw the shirt torn at the back and said: 'The
source of this is women'sdeviousness. Without a doubt your guile is
very great'" (Surah Yusuf: 28).Unbelieving women often try to resolve
situations by conspiring, intriguing, or lying instead of seeking
rational solutions. Indulging Satan's suggestions, they fall back on
hypocrisy, cowardice, or devious methods. Believing women, on the
other hand, resolve their problems by honesty, openness, and
sincerity, for their awareness of Allah totally removes them from such
inappropriate behavior.
Unbelieving women alsoare characterized by envy. Allah mentions
envious people and warns others about theirevil: "Say: 'I seek refuge
with the Lord of Daybreak, from the evil of what He has created and
from the evil of the darkness when it gathers, and from the evil of
women who blowon knots and from the evil of an envier when he envies'"
(Surat al-Falaq: 1-5). Some unbelieving women are prone to such
behavior, which causes distrust, tantrums, broken relationships, and
endless arguments, all ofwhich result in an unfulfilled and unhappy
life. In addition, they cause great suffering and damage to themselves
and to those around them. Believing women, however, will disregard
this aspect of human ego, knowing that it leads to great losses in
this life as well as in the next.
Mockery is another character defect of unbelieving women. In the
following verse Allahwarns them against suchbehavior: "O you who
believe! People should not ridicule others who may be better than
themselves; nor should any women ridicule other women who may be
better than themselves. And do not find fault with one another or
insult each other with derogatory nicknames" (Surat al-Hujurat: 11).
Those women who are shaped by the unbelief that rules their societies
do not hesitate to ridicule people for their shortcomings or to
mockothers, because they do not think of the Hereafter. They do not
consider this behavior aswrong, but rather as a kind of humor. Often
thismockery is not even verbal, but is expressed by making faces,
rolling one's eyes, imitating their mannerisms, or whispering about
them. Believing women shun such activities, because they know that
Allah requires them to live according to the Qur'an'smorality.
In another verse, Allah reminds people not to speculate or gossip
about others: "O you who believe! Avoid most suspicion. Indeed, some
suspicion is a crime. Do not spy and do not backbite one another.
Would any of you like to eat his brother's dead flesh? No, you would
hate it. And have fear of Allah. Allah is Ever-Returning, Most
Merciful" (Surat al-Hujurat: 12).
Believing women live dignified lives. Instead of mocking others, they
try to help. They compliment people who are successful, instead
ofsuccumbing to envy and gossip. And, when in the company of
unbelieving people who might somehow offend them, they do not
compromise their integrity or dignity.