'' Our Lord ! grant us good in this world and good in the hereafter and save us from the torment of the Fire '' [Ameen]
-
{in Arab} :->
Rabbanaa aatinaa fid-dunyaa hasanatan wafil aakhirati hasanatan waqinaa 'athaaban-naar/-
(Surah Al-Baqarah ,verse 201)
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time before I decided to put it in writing, but I am tired of carrying
this load and I'd like to share it with you :)
My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years and 8 months... A
long time, I know :) In the beginning, just like every start of a
relationship, it was like a fairy tale... Crazy in love, wild and
happy. You know how it is, right?
Only that in the past year and few months, everything turned upside
down. He went abroad for a few months. When he came back, he came to
live with me. I work and study at the same and it's sometimes really
hard for me, but I think I am managing somehow :)
The thing is that he isn't helping me with anything. When he comes
back from work, he sits on his computer and starts playing games till
midnight.
I am the one who's cleaning, cooking, tidying up, washing and putting
thins in order... In the beginning, it didn't bother me. I thought, he
wasn't used to this kind of life just yet. I was really enjoying
taking care of him. But he is taking it too far!!!
I don't think that he is even realizing how tired I feel sometimes and
that I need a little help. We have discussed it many times and every
time he says that he is going to change, that he is going to pay more
attention to me and that he is going to start helping me, but...?
Nothing is ever changing. I am sick of it! Things aren't going well
and I can feel it. He says he loves me, but he is in no way showing
that he treasures me. We are fighting almost every day and he has
become increasingly stubborn. He blames me for everything!
I am not sure if it is my dynamic lifestyle or the arguing that we do,
but I think our love is dead!!!Or at least as far as I'm concerned. I
am just tired of fighting for the lost spark in our relationship.
Yes, I think I don't love him anymore and it is killing me to say
this, because I remember how things used to be... So, the thing that I
keep asking myself is, does a moment always come in which the love
just dies? Or is this just not the right person for me?
Does such thing as true love even exist; the kind that makes you happy
every day and makes you feel alive?
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