Waswaas and suicide.

Dought clear - Although I observe my five daily prayers and I am
practising (AlhamduliLAH) I experience serious waswas. This waswas is
not normal e.g. shaytan telling me not to pray. Attimes I am close to
commiting suicide just because of this, even though I am content
andhappy with what ALLAH has given me in this life. Subhan ALLAH my
body moves or I am ready to jump on train tracks even though I am
aware of the punishment of ALLAH to the one who commits suicide. This
becomes very frighting later on when I reflect. Once I was sat on an
edge/cliff and I began moving further and further towards the ocean
until half my bodywas on the other side. AlhamduliLAH my brother
pulled me and said are you crazy! I do not know what I was doing.
Somthing was telling go furhter , go further. How can I overcome this
fitna o brother in islam.
Praise be to Allah.
You should understand that man is the one who produces his waswaas and
negative thoughts, and he is the one who causes himself to hear these
voices inside his mind. In most cases it is an echo of what he is
thinking about and the details thereof that preoccupy his mind, or
itis a reflection of the reality he is living, or it isan accumulation
of past bad experiences the effect and traces of which he has not been
able to erase and overcome (and he is still dwelling on them).
But persuading yourself that you are helpless in the face of these
insinuating thoughts and that it is something beyond your control is
the most significant part of the dilemma; in fact this is one of the
deepestpits that humans in general fall into with regard to thought,
reason and contemplation. This is the difference between our father
Adam (peace be upon him) and Iblees.Adam (peace be upon him) admitted
his sin, declared his repentance,turned to Allah and was confident
that he could overcome this situation, so he and his wife said: "Our
Lord! We have wronged ourselves. If You forgive us not, and bestow not
upon us YourMercy, we shall certainly be of the losers" [al-A'raaf
7:23]. In contrast, Iblees, may Allah curse him, blamed his Lord for
his disbelief and stubbornness, and behaved as if he was weak and
helpless, unable to save himself from the situation in which he found
himself. He said, addressing Allah(may He be glorified): "Because You
have sent me astray, surely I will sitin wait against them (human
beings) on Your Straight Path" [al-A'raaf 7:16].
The remedy to this problem begins with realising that you are able to
deal with it and that it will be easy once you arm yourself with
resolve, determination and willpower, and follow the example of
millions who have gone through all kinds of problems and troubles, but
they remained steadfast and overcame their troubles, and became a
cause of happiness for those around them and brought development and
success to their countries and communities. You are not less
significant than them and your trials are not greater than theirs;
rather it is nothing but avoice echoing inside your mind. So let your
reason be the thing that leads you and energizes you to turn a deaf
ear to these whispers, no matter how loud they are; the passage of
time will help to reduce this voice bit by bit, until it has
diminished completely, by Allah's leave.
Remember the hadeeth of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him),
according to whichthe Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon
him) said: "Whoever throws himself down from a mountain and kills
himself will be throwing himself down in the Fire of Hell for ever and
ever.Whoever drinks poison and kills himself will be sipping it in the
Fire of Hell for ever and ever. Whoever kills himself with a piece of
iron will have that iron in his hand, thrusting it into his belly in
the Fire of Hell for ever and ever."
Narrated by al-Bukhaari,5778; Muslim, 109.
If you ponder this hadeeth you will realise the seriousness of the
matter. There is nothing standing between you and this punishment
except the barrier of death, which could comeat any moment. On the
other hand, there is nothing standing between you and the promise of
paradise and eternal happiness exceptthe same barrier. So whychoose
for yourself punishment and pain; why deprive yourself of eternal
bliss? The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:
"Paradise is closer to one of you thanthe strap of his sandal, and
Hell is the same."
Narrated by al-Bukhaari,6488.
Whatever the case, the most beneficial and mostpowerful remedy for all
destructive psychological problems is the wisdom that Imamash-Shaafa'i
(may Allah have mercy on him) learned from his experience of life. He
used to say: Pay attention to your nafs, for if you do not preoccupy
yourself with the truth it will distract you with falsehood. The truth
with which you can preoccupy yourself requires a great deal of
sacrifice from us and from you. This world is full of different kinds
of good in which you can immerse yourself, so youwill hardly have any
thoughts except thoughts about doing good things, and you will not pay
attention to anything but what thosegood deeds require. So this will
be a means of raising your status before Allah, may He be exalted,
whilst also helping you to overcomeyour psychological problems.
Finally, we also advise you to see a doctor or psychologist, and do
not take this matter lightly. Many doctors can reducethe impact of
(negative) ideas and thinking by means of medicines that correct
hormonal imbalances in the body. Many people have benefited from
treatment by trustworthy doctors, in addition to the spiritual and
Islamic advice given above.
We ask Allah, may He be exalted, to grant you a speedy recovery.
And Allah knows best.