I HAULED MY LUGGAGE up into the back of the carriage with one big huff.
I'd been cursing under my breath the whole time. Even more so at the
fact that it was barely five o'clock in the A.M. and I was stuck being
a bellhop than actually sleeping. Like normal people do at this hour.
"That's the last of them!" Grams chided from the front of the
carriage. I wiped the back of my hand on my forehead, and scowled.
"It damn well better be, or so help me God, I'm going to grow enough
muscles to carry the both of us home." I muttered to myself.
I was this close to collapsing on the ground from all the
busting-my-ass with all of this luggage. It made me regret packing
such a load in the first place.
I was ushered toward thecarriage where my Gramssat in the carrier part.
A middle-aged man was leading the carriage and I found myself angry
withhim all of a sudden, since he'd made it quite apparent that
watching agirl with ten bags - that were twice my weight – was more
helpful than suggesting to help a hand.
Shouldn't he be doing this? What ever happened to male chivalry, or
did that just happen in movies?
I bit back the urge to kickhim, or wipe that sleazy smirk off his
face. The wind ruffled his scraggy beard, and his sly blue eyes made
me shiver.
"All done sweetheart? " I grimaced as he smiled histoothless grin.
"Hop on up now, up you go." He nodded his head toward the carriage.
I glared at him hating thefact that he was rushing me. I was stalling
now, and I wasn't sure what I was waiting for, but I couldn't find the
courageto get into the carriage.
I turned to where grams was sitting and then backout toward the
estate, not sure of what or whom I was searching for.
"Willow, please get in. You'll catch a cold." I stepped closer, and
then hesitated at the silent thought that summoned to the surface.
Satchel. Why hasn't Satchel made an appearance? He knew I was leaving…didn't he?
I hadn't seen him since last night, after he'd leapt out of my window.
My head was still reeling on the idea of that even being remotely
possible. Standing here though, when I was only seconds away from
leaving.
I felt an instant tug, like something was telling meI was doing the
wrong thing by leaving without saying goodbye.
I fumbled with the front of my button down jacket, and looked up into
my grandmothers' gaze with sorrow.
"What is it dear?" I shookmy head and looked out over the vast stretch
of greenery.
Hoping I'd see the scruffyboy that I'd met just two or three days ago.
I'd given him grief over the past few days I admit, butsurely he'd
give me the benefit of the doubt or atleast see me off.
What am I saying. It's not like I like the guy... .
The instant thought made it seem false in my mind. I wasn't sure if
convincing myself of that would make me like him any less, but I
thought lying to myself would make me feel better.
It didn't, and I scolded myself for stalling.
"Grams? Is it true that you kept my fathers calls separate from me?
Did hereally want to know me?"
"Willow, please get in thecart. We're going off schedule." I glared
and had the urge to bite backa trail of cussing.
"Grams, just answer the question…please" I hastily added. Despite
being angry with her, I was in no position to disrespect her with my
tone. I softened it.
"I just want to know if my father could have loved me, given the
chance." She sighed.
"I…yes. I kept his calls from you." I frowned andstepped away from the carriage.
"Why?" I shook my head before she could interrupt.
"-And please don't tell meit was to 'protect me' because in case you
haven't noticed, I'm sixteen, seventeen in the fall, and I know that's
a petty little excuse adults tend to use on their gullible 'children'.
I'm nota child, and I want the truth." She eyed me warily and finally
nodded.
"No you're quite right. You're not a child, but you still wouldn't
understand if I told you the truth."
"Try me." I challenged. Her eyebrows raised in astonishment, but then
she masked it, gesturing for me to sit next to her, like she'd done so
often to calm me.
"How about you jump in first, and I'll tell you whatI can." I found
myself shaking my head.
"No grams. I'll jump in, only if you tell me everything I need to
know." I couldn't help but notice the shock on her face at my sudden
disobedience. I'd never raised my voice in front of her, or even went
against her word.
But something changed, and maybe she'd been hiding too much from mefor
my liking. My grandmother wouldn't budge, however, and I knew if given
the strength. I was sure she would haul me into the carriage herself.
Even the horses seemed to be losing patience with me. I didn't care.
There was something strong holding me to thisland.
Don't leave me again…
The wind carried to my ear. I whipped my head around to study my surroundings.
Nothing.
I winced as the toothless man struck the horse with a whip, making the
carriage move slightly, then winked at me.
"Time is getting along, child. What's it going to be?" I shuddered.
Grams hand was outstretched, ushering me inside and I found myself
standing there shaking my head.
"I'm sorry grams, but I'm leaving you this time. I do wish you a safe
journey home. Please forgive me." And with that I kicked off my heels
and ran in the opposite direction.
I could hear my grandmother's protests from behind me, and the gallop
of hooves as they retreated farther from my ears.
I didn't look back.
I won't leave you this time, Satchel
I promised, focusing on putting one leg in front of the other as I ran.
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Tuesday, December 18, 2012
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