Story, - Confused...

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I don't knw how to strt.. 2 yrs bck a boy used to lyk me.. I don't even knew him.. wen I came to knw abt him.. I saw d boy.. his name was chinmay.. I dint lyk him at dat tym.. but just becoz of my frndz I got in a relationship with him.. but 2nd day I broke up wid him.. becoz it was soo in a hurry I dint gt even tym to thnk abt him.. soo I broke up.. but we became frndz on fb.. vry gud frndz.. days passed he proposed me again 3 tymes.. but at dat tym I lyked sum1 else..his name ws yash.. so I never said yes to him... After 2 yrs one. day my frnd told me dat I lyk yash but I will nvr get him.. its better if I say yes to chinmay.. I told dem dat I m not desperate to get yash its just ok with me if he was my crush.. but they dint listen to me.. nd dey told me to get in a relationship with chinmay.. becoz he still lyked me...
My frnd told me to.gve him one chance.. I too gave him dat one chance.. I said him about yash.. nd evrythng still he said if I m comfortable wd him he have no problem..I live in hostel.. nd I dint have ny cellphn. We used to talk.only in skul.. again he nvr complained abt me anythng.. the best part of him was his nature.. he was awsm.. He look cute..:)) slowly I strd falling for him.. but as said good tymes never last for long.. as d same wd me.. it ws almost 3 nd half months of our relation.. wen I came on outing I used to talk to him on phone.. we used to fight every day.. I don't want anyone to restrict me.. or ask me to change.. if u feel I need to change for anyone I will change myself.. he always asked me to Chnge.. he always said me I don't knoe d.meaning of relationship..!!
What is relationship..?? A boy nd a gal get commuted.. dey share some feelings for each other.. whether it is fake or genuine.. saying I luv uh to each other.. doing some promises to each other.. dey knoe dat dose. Promises dey will not fullfill.. huh..:/ And I finally I was fed up I broke up once again.. at dat tym I was happy..:)) I was.lyk finally I got my space.. my freedom.. but frankly speaking chinmay never bounded me fem anything..:)) Infct I dint give him d reason for break up.. as I knw I should. But I dint... Wt reason I would have given.. wen I too don't knoe d exact reason fr break up..:/ finally I tried to frgt him..den again yash came to my lyf.. I strd chatng wth.him.. I even get commited with yash for ten days.. after break up I realized.Wt a dumbhead I was.. the person who don't even care abt me..I lyked him the whole one year..I wasted my precious.tym thnking abt him.. after dis matter I thought I will nvr lyk anyone lyk this.. but my promise to myself not.lasted for long.. I strtd tolkng to chinmay once again.. he had changed d skul aftr break up.. just becoz of me.. ( atleast dat wat I thnk.) nd now I tolkd.to him nd with.his talks I can feel he lykes me vry much..now I dunnoe Wt to do.. I hv also discover some feelings for him.. but I dun wanna be in a relation again..!! Nd I cnt avoid himm.. Plzz.help me what should I doo..??? ):)




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Story, - First love

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hi... I'm very happy today to share to all of you my love story.It's been a long time love story of mine. 10 years, yes 10 years! first crush, first love. my friend, my brother, my best friend, my crush and my LOVE. He is really nice, gentleman and handsome guy. He is the best friend of my brother. and i got his attention and we are close together. he knows that i have a crush on him. Because all of my classmates knows it. i am very grateful to be with him as a friend. but times and years come a long. my feelings for him been stronger. He had a girlfriend at that time, but because i know my limitation being his friend i respect his feelings. Being in love with him i decide to be a good friend. a friend always there for him.
he broke up with his girlfriend and nothing change between us. we text morning to night. until one day he text me "WILL YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND?" but i reply to him. NO! i don't know why i said NO to him that day. but all i know is i don't want to rush everything to us.
Years again for both of us to have no communication. and one day he told me that all of his family are going to japan to be with there father. I am very sad about what he said to me. but he said that we can send email and call to each other.
year 2009... I am the most happiest girl in this world. why? because he called me and he said that he is already here in Philippines and he can't wait to see me. He also said in our conversation that he had important to say to me and he want to be with me.
I pray a lot to see him and be with him again. I ask my friend about us and they said i should meet him.
I travel about hours just to be with him. I have a question in my mind What is the important thing that he really need to say to me, just to come over here.
finally the moment I've been waiting for. I am with him and he smile at me, we both happy. and when the time that we got chance to talk.
He said that he also in love with me... he doesn't know when it's started but he got that feelings and then he wants to see me just to say that to me. I cried because i can't expect that he can also like me. kissed me that night. my first love holding me right now and then kiss me. oh my God! i can't describe to all you how happy i am.
and suddenly stop and talk again to me and said.
we could not be together and be my girlfriend.
my eyes can't imagine he would said that to me after he kiss me and told me he loves me too...
3 reason why we cant be lover.
1. Because of my brother
2. Because of my parents
3. He live in Japan
My heart so glad that i know that he can also love me. but what is the reason why he told me and we can't be...
after he go back to japan. i realize that it doesn't matter at all. as long as i know that my first love also love me. even i can't call him my boyfriend but i know if we are meant for each other the right times comes.
2012 yes! this year... he said me message in my Facebook he said that he going here this October and he also said that he is looking forward to see me again. I ask him what his plan why he decide to come back here. He said again that he wants to see me.
he wants to see me again. i don't know what is the meaning of that. and i don't expect that he would said anything about me. but i am very excited to see him and talk to him personally like before.
my heart beats faster and i can't sleep because of that. September end now and soon he is here with me.
I wrote this because i want to end all of this because it's been years and i realize that i can be happy and i can't g back to my high school feelings that i am in love with him and now he is back again and what for?
I'm not hoping...but i am happy to be his friend since then. He hurts me so many times and i forget it all.
Glad that i have a wonderful feelings that i can share to all of you. once that you finally saw the man for you and you know that he deserve and worth for your love.. don't doubt and take risk



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Don't look for someone who will solve all your problems; look for someone who will face them with you.... - GOOD MORNING!

Health and Fitness, - Nourish Your Child's Bodyand Mind

As parents, we try to protect our children from anything and
everything that we feel may harm them. We warn them of the dangers of
strangers; we teach them the importance of safety on the playground
and during other outdoor activities; we caution them about crossing
the street. But how much care and concern do we have about their
nutrition and the food that goes into their bodies? Of course, we are
worried about them getting enough to eat and drink; we want them to
have three meals a day, we want them to want for nothing, but do we
really care enough to ensure that they have eight glasses of water,
five servings of fruits and vegetables, 5-7 servings of grains, etc?
For most of us, the answer is an embarrassed "No." Surely, we care
about our children, but we are just not diligent enough nor do we have
enough time in the day to be sure that they have exactly the right
amount of every type of food that they need.
Whether Toddler or Teen: Making Nutrition Fun
No matter how old or young our children are, it's always our job while
they are under our care and supervision to be sure that they are
healthy and well cared for. One way to be sure of this is to be sure
that they are eating well and making sure that they understand the
importance of good nutrition. When our children are toddlers, this
seems to present a completely different set of challenges. Young kids
are picky about the colors and smells and textures of foods. They
don't like to try new things. Some studies indicate that it could take
as many as eighteen attempts or suggestions before a child will try
something new. As a parent, this can be frustrating and time
consuming.
However, there are a few strategies that we can try to encourage our
youngsters to eat their colors, shapes, textures, and everything in
between:
1. Eat meals together. A family that eats together is likely to enjoy
a variety of foods and the kids are more likely to eat broccoli or
whole-wheat rolls if everyone else is eating them, as well. Also, in
the midst of conversation, everything tastes better.
2. Disguise as many foods as you can, as a parent and cook. When
possible, puree the spinach in your pasta sauce, serve whole wheat
pasta instead of semolina. Be as creative as you can be and need to
be; your family will get their essential vitamins and minerals, and
you will have to fight with the kids that much less.
3. Offer variety whenever possible, as soon as possible. The older a
toddler will get, the more he can get set in his ways. Kids can become
incredible creatures of habit. Once they decide they love mac n'
cheese, for example, they might decide that this is all they want to
eat for the next two months. If you can introduce many other foods to
them and they are willing 'to bite,' then they will be more likely to
not latch onto any one food. This will enable them enhance their diet
significantly.
4. Set a good example. When our kids see us eating our fruits and
veggies, drinking our eight glasses of water, choosing frozen yogurt
over ice cream, they will begin to recognize the importance of taking
care of the bodies that Allah Almighty gave us. More importantly, we
can also teach them the importance of taking care of the bodies that
Allah Almighty gave us. More importantly, we can also teach them the
importance of moderation: Our children should learn as early as
possible not to waste and not to overindulge. In fact, the Prophet,
sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, recommended that we fill our stomachs
one third with food, one third with drink and one third with air.
Anything more than that would be considered indulgent - not to mention
harmful to the body and can cause illness and laziness.
Food Fun for Toddlers
For older kids and teens, involving them in the food preparation
process helps get them interested in food and nutrition. When they are
between the ages of about 5-10, parents can ask children to help with
simple tasks like the following:
1. Planning meals. Ask your child for ideas and suggestions on what
they would like to have for lunch at school or for dinner for the
whole family. Give them two or three choices and have them select one.
They should choose a meat, a fruit and/or vegetable and some grain.
Explain to them the significance and necessity of the different types
of foods that our body needs.
2. Have your children help with the preparation whenever possible, and
try to make it fun. They can chop the veggies and wash the rice; if
you measure the spices, they can dump them into the saucepan. If you
supervise, they can blend or puree with the blender or mixer.
3. Make your recipes fun. If you are having pizza for dinner, make
mini pizzas instead. Buy mini dough and have each child prepare his or
her own pizza. Lay out the sauce, cheese, and toppings and let them go
wild. Of course, they have to help with the clean up, but you will be
pleasantly surprised at how many veggies a child will eat when she
makes her own pizza.
Teaching Teens Nutritional Essentials
Teens obviously can take on a lot more than merely chopping some
onions and grating some cheese for you. Rather than dictating to them
what's for dinner, why not have them tell you for a change? Let them
choose one or two nights a week )when their school work's not such a
load( and they can prepare dinner from start to finish. This can
include deciding what to make, giving you a grocery list of what
they'll need )or they can do the shopping themselves(, making the meal
)with or without your help( and then serving it. And yes, if they want
to use our good dishes, we must allow it!
Teens will develop most of their habits and manners by this age about
how they will raise their own children.
Allowing them to 'practice' in your home before they have one of their
own is the best way to make sure that they know the importance of
balanced meals, good nutrition, family meals together, gracious
hospitality, and appropriate Islamic manners. As a vital part of their
training, we should be sure that they know how to not only provide
good food for themselves and their family, but how to do so
efficiently, on a budget, in a pleasant manner, and with the best
intention. This means that they need to keep in mind their health,
their manners, their enjoyment, and their lifestyle.
As with every aspect of our lives, we have to incorporate Islamic
manners and etiquettes. We have to be sure to give thanks before our
meals; be grateful after each meal; be sure to give charity regularly
to remember those who don't have as much as we do; avoid wasting food
and throwing food out; avoid eating from that which is unlawful, and
choose from foods and drinks that are permissible and good for us.
There are manners and etiquettes that we should observe when it comes
to eating and drinking. There are things that we should )and should
not( say and do.
Our children learn from us these manners and it's up to us to teach
them the best way to not only observe them but remember them at the
opportune times and then be able to teach their own families when that
time comes. As parents, we must set an example by showing them that
it's not only important to put good food into our bodies but
understand the significance of caring and respecting our bodies. We
show our children respect for our mind and body by exercising, eating
right, worshipping and giving due thanks. What our children learn from
this will extend far beyond their youth; it will yield for them a
lifetime of healthy and happy memories.

Personal, - Hidden Power in the PureDisposition - I

We face a huge challenge when we bring up our children, that is, we
are not alone in bringing them up but the whole society contributes to
the process. Television, school, friends and the internet are all
contributing to the upbringing process, particularly after the globe
has become like a small village after the gigantic development in mass
media and the fact that cultures can easily move from one place to
another. This poses a huge challenge to the upbringing of our
children. How shall we protect them from the other stormy trends of
upbringing that are broadcast by the mass media and which spread by
means of the street, school and clubs, from one to the other? Allaah
The Almighty favored us by a power which helps us in the process of
upbringing - it is a hidden power that no body knows except the one
who appreciates it. It is, indeed, a gift from Allaah, The Lord of the
Worlds.
This hidden power is the pure disposition that Allaah The Almighty
created in mankind. No matter how man changes, this hidden power calls
him to take him back to the path of truth. Allaah The Almighty Says
)what means(:}So direct your face toward the religion, inclining to
truth. ]Adhere to[ the Fitrah of Allaah upon which He has created
]all[ people. No change should there be in the creation of Allaah.
That is the correct religion, but most of the people do not
know.{]Quran 30:30[ The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
said:"Every human is born on Fitrah )sound innate inclination to the
truth(."Ash-Shawkaani, may Allaah have mercy upon him, commented,
"Every child is born with an inclination to the true religion, so if
he adheres to another religion, this would be due to an external
factor that happened to him after birth. The factors might be changes
on the part of his parents or those responsible for raising him."
Therefore, people assuming the upbringing process must be certain that
any changes in the child's innate disposition are due to those who
bring him up. That is because the child is like the whitest blank
paper. Dr. 'Abdullaah Naasih 'Ulwaan says,
Educationists and moralists believe that the child is born with the
natural inclination to Tawheed )Islamic monotheism( and faith in
Allaah The Almighty, and with the origin of purity and innocence.
Thus, when he is given a conscious upbringing at home, righteous
social companionship and a faith-boosting educational environment, he
will grow with firm faith, virtuous morals and a righteous upbringing.
This faith-based fact was confirmed by the Quran and the Prophet,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, and was proved evident by educationists
and moralists.
Sayyid Qutb, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, "Thus, the Surah
)Qur'anic chapter( links human nature with the nature of this
religion. Both are made by Allaah The Almighty, in accordance with the
law of existence; both are mutually harmonious in their natures and
objectives. Human nature is set on a firm basis, and so is the divine
religion. When people deviate from the proper path of nature, only
divine religion turns them back to it, since it is in full harmony
with both the human and universal nature.
Pure disposition is a divine gift
This innate belief is a gift from Allaah The Almighty which helps and
supports you in raising your child. It also serves as an internal call
which permanently echoes in the heart of every Muslim, urging him to
return to the path of truth. This call, no matter how distant man is
from and disobedient to his Lord Allaah, keeps echoing loudly within
his body and stimulates his reproaching soul, calling him, "Turn back
to Allaah The Almighty."
Dear parent, or anyone assuming the responsibility of the upbringing
process, you have an irresistible power called "the call of Fitrah
)innate belief(" which:
- constitutes the inner call inside every person to do good and avoid evil
- stimulates man's reproaching soul when he does something evil
- stirs the inner feeling that death and resurrection are inevitable
- awakens man's conscience
Since Allaah The Almighty supported you with this power, your duty is
only to provide a good role model and accustom your child to
righteousness. By doing so, you are playing the greatest role in
shaping, preparing and raising your child successfully. It is a trust
you carry on your shoulders and you have to meet Allaah The Almighty
successful in fulfilling it on the Day of Resurrection.
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, utilized the Companions' Fitrah
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, perfectly utilized the
power of Fitrah with his noble Companions, may Allaah be pleased with
them. He made it a basis for raising them on the immortal meanings of
Islam. A very clear example is Abu Bakr As-Siddeeq, may Allaah be
pleased with him, who is the most trustworthy man in this Ummah
)nation(. The calls of the innate belief were blowing in his heart
since an early age, implying, "These idols can neither bring about
benefit nor inflict harm, and that Allaah The Almighty is One and the
only Deity worthy of worship." Yet, he needed to see the role model
that affirmed, venerated and strengthened this innate belief. The
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, was the best role model for
him, and Abu Bakr, may Allaah be pleased with him, was the first man
to embrace Islam without hesitation. The reason was his innate belief.
Listen to Abu Bakr, may Allaah be pleased with him, talking about his
childhood and how his innate belief barred him from worshiping idols.
In a group of the Companions of the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam,, Abu Bakr, may Allaah be pleased with him, said, "I have never
prostrated to an idol. When I became mature, Abu Quhaafah took me by
hand and went to a site where idols were set up. He said to me, "These
are your high and lofty gods," then he left me alone. I drew near to
an idol and said: "I am hungry, feed me," but it did not reply. I
said: "I am naked, clothe me," but it did not reply. So, I threw a
stone at its face, and it collapsed."
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, utilized this innate
belief that was firmly inculcated in the heart of Abu Bakr, may Allaah
be pleased with him, to introduce to Islam the most trustworthy man in
this Ummah, his companion in the cave and his first successor.

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NAJIMUDEEN M/
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Personal, - Hidden Power in the PureDisposition - II

See how the pure disposition was a strong reason for the guidance of
Abu Bakr As-Siddeeq, may Allaah be pleased with him. Also, look at
'Abdullaah ibn Mas'ood, may Allaah be pleased with him, whose pure
disposition prevented him from giving the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi
wa sallam, some of the milk entrusted to him. He told the Prophet,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, "I am a trusted boy." Ibn Mas'ood, may
Allaah be pleased with him, said,
I was herding sheep for 'Uqbah ibn Abu Mu'ayt, and one day the
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, and Abu Bakr passed by me. The
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"O boy, do you have some
milk for us to drink?"I said, "Yes, but I am entrusted to look after
it." He said:"Do you have a ewe that has not been copulated by a ram
)i.e. does not produce milk(?"I brought him a ewe and when he rubbed
its udder, it produced milk. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam, milked it and let Abu Bakr drink, then he said to the
udder:"Shrink )i.e. stop producing milk(", and it stopped. I said, "O
Messenger of Allaah, teach me the like of what you said." He wiped my
head and said:"May Allaah have mercy upon you! You are a knowledgeable
boy."]Ibn Hibbaan[
In another narration, Ibn Mas'ood, may Allaah be pleased with him, said,
I went to the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, and said, "Teach
me these good words." He said:"You are a knowledgeable boy."Later on,
I learned from the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, himself
seventy Surahs that no body disputes with me on." ]Ahmad[ ]Al-Albaani:
Saheeh[
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, took advantage of the pure
innate belief of 'Abdullaah ibn Mas'ood, may Allaah be pleased with
him, who later became the best man from whom the Quran was learnt, and
the man who brought the head of Abu Jahl the pharaoh of this Ummah
)nation( to the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam.
Thus, a child is a very white blank paper that you draw on with your
own hands. You can utilize and invest this pure disposition in raising
your child as the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, did or do
the opposite. For that reason, Imaam Al-Ghazaali, may Allaah have
mercy upon him, said,
A child is a trust with his parents, and his pure heart is an intact
jewel that has no inscriptions or drawings. The child's heart is
susceptible to every inscription and is inclined to whatever is
offered to it. If he gets used to and is taught goodness, he will grow
on goodness and his parents, teachers and those who brought him up
will be happy in this life and in the Hereafter. If he gets used to
evil and is left like animals, he will be miserable and doomed, and
the sin will be burdened on his guardian and those put in his charge.
Absence of sound upbringing affects the Fitrah
Man's pure disposition is badly affected when it lacks the appropriate
atmosphere which helps it to develop and benefit from its power and
impact on the child's upbringing. The pure disposition may be
distorted as a result of the corrupt environment in which the child
lives, the parents' negligence, and the children's integration with
the other ways of upbringing in the society.
This happens when the role model does not play his role at home as an
important means of upbringing, and thus, matters take the opposite
direction; what is right becomes wrong and what is wrong becomes
right. Nevertheless, man's pure disposition does not completely die
and it is not meant to die; it searches for a role model in another
place and a sincere source for upbringing. Once it finds that role
model and source, it returns to the right path.
Raising a single child on Islam, like raising one thousand children or
all children, requires the presence of the Muslim household, the
Muslim street, the Muslim school and the Muslim society. All these
factors together have a far-reaching impact on raising children and
shaping them in their own fashion. They raise the children either upon
constantly observing Islam or on deviation. We cannot overlook the
impact of the child's temperament as well as the new and old habits
inherited from the parents and family on forming his personality since
he was born to them and influenced by them before the house, the
street, the school or the society affected and molded him.
Once a sound upbringing is absent or the upbringing and guidance are
corrupt, deviations resulting from hereditary factors take root
instead of being corrected; and aggravate instead of being improved.
Hence, people presume that heredity is dominant and critical in
shaping the child's personality. However, it is not like that. This
presumption may only be correct when inherited habits are left without
guidance, exactly as everything aggravates and exacerbates when it is
left free. It is not because it is strongly and violently incorporated
in his nature; rather, it is because nothing hinders or trims it, and
thus, it continues its way.
Ivy has the most delicate branches because it is a climbing plant and
cannot support itself. This plant must depend on something to climb
and grow on. How does this plant look when it is fully grown, and
climbs on and intertwines with other things? It blocks the way and you
can hardly pass through its branches.

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NAJIMUDEEN M/
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Dought & clear, - The reason why smoking is haraam

why is smoking haram?
Praise be to Allaah.
Perhaps you know that all nations of the world - Muslim and kaafir
alike - have now started to fight smoking, because they know that it
is very harmful. Islam forbids everything that is harmful, because the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There
should be no harming or reciprocating harm."
Undoubtedly there are foods and drinks which are beneficial and good,
and others which are harmful and bad. Allaah described our Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in the following terms
(interpretation of the meaning):
"he allows them as lawful At Tayyibaat (i.e. all good and lawful as
regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods), and prohibits them
as unlawful Al Khabaa'ith (i.e. all evil and unlawful as regards
things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods)
[al-A'raaf 7:157]
Is smoking one of the good and lawful things (al-tayyibaat) or one of
the evil and unlawful things (al-khabaa'ith)?
Secondly: it was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah forbids you to trade gossip, to ask
too many questions and to waste money." And Allaah forbade wasteful
extravagance when He said (interpretation of the meaning):
"and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He
(Allaah) likes not Al Musrifoon (those who waste by
extravagance)[al-A'raaf 7:31]
And He described the slaves of the Most Merciful as follows
(interpretation of the meaning):
"And those who, when they spend, are neither extravagant nor
niggardly, but hold a medium (way) between those
(extremes)"[al-Furqaan 25:67]
The whole world now knows that the money spent on smoking is to be
considered as money wasted, from which no benefit is gained; indeed,
it is money spent on something harmful. If the money which is spent on
smoking worldwide were to be collected, it could have saved entire
populations who have died of starvation. Is there anyone more foolish
that one who holds a dollar bill and sets fire to it? What is the
difference between him and the one who smokes? Indeed, the smoker is
more foolish, because the folly of the one who burns a dollar bill
ends there, whilst the one who smokes burns his money and also harms
his body.
Thirdly: how many disasters have been caused by smoking, because of
cigarette butts which are thrown away and cause fires. Other disasters
have been caused in other ways, as when a house was burned down with
its occupants inside, when a man lit his cigarette when there was a
gas leak.
Fourthly: how many people are offended by the smell of smokers,
especially when you are unfortunate enough to have one of them
standing next to you in the mosque. Probably any nasty smell is easier
to bear than the smell of the smoker's mouth when he has just woken
up. It is amazing how many women can put up with the smell of their
husbands' mouths! The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) forbade those who had eaten garlic or onions from coming to the
mosque so that they would not offend their fellow-worshippers with
their smell. The smell of onions and garlic is easier to bear than the
smell of the smoker and his mouth.
These are some of the reasons why smoking is haraam.

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Dought & clear, - The reason why smoking is haraam

why is smoking haram?
Praise be to Allaah.
Perhaps you know that all nations of the world - Muslim and kaafir
alike - have now started to fight smoking, because they know that it
is very harmful. Islam forbids everything that is harmful, because the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There
should be no harming or reciprocating harm."
Undoubtedly there are foods and drinks which are beneficial and good,
and others which are harmful and bad. Allaah described our Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in the following terms
(interpretation of the meaning):
"he allows them as lawful At Tayyibaat (i.e. all good and lawful as
regards things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods), and prohibits them
as unlawful Al Khabaa'ith (i.e. all evil and unlawful as regards
things, deeds, beliefs, persons and foods)
[al-A'raaf 7:157]
Is smoking one of the good and lawful things (al-tayyibaat) or one of
the evil and unlawful things (al-khabaa'ith)?
Secondly: it was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: "Allaah forbids you to trade gossip, to ask
too many questions and to waste money." And Allaah forbade wasteful
extravagance when He said (interpretation of the meaning):
"and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He
(Allaah) likes not Al Musrifoon (those who waste by
extravagance)[al-A'raaf 7:31]
And He described the slaves of the Most Merciful as follows
(interpretation of the meaning):
"And those who, when they spend, are neither extravagant nor
niggardly, but hold a medium (way) between those
(extremes)"[al-Furqaan 25:67]
The whole world now knows that the money spent on smoking is to be
considered as money wasted, from which no benefit is gained; indeed,
it is money spent on something harmful. If the money which is spent on
smoking worldwide were to be collected, it could have saved entire
populations who have died of starvation. Is there anyone more foolish
that one who holds a dollar bill and sets fire to it? What is the
difference between him and the one who smokes? Indeed, the smoker is
more foolish, because the folly of the one who burns a dollar bill
ends there, whilst the one who smokes burns his money and also harms
his body.
Thirdly: how many disasters have been caused by smoking, because of
cigarette butts which are thrown away and cause fires. Other disasters
have been caused in other ways, as when a house was burned down with
its occupants inside, when a man lit his cigarette when there was a
gas leak.
Fourthly: how many people are offended by the smell of smokers,
especially when you are unfortunate enough to have one of them
standing next to you in the mosque. Probably any nasty smell is easier
to bear than the smell of the smoker's mouth when he has just woken
up. It is amazing how many women can put up with the smell of their
husbands' mouths! The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) forbade those who had eaten garlic or onions from coming to the
mosque so that they would not offend their fellow-worshippers with
their smell. The smell of onions and garlic is easier to bear than the
smell of the smoker and his mouth.
These are some of the reasons why smoking is haraam.

Dought & clear, - Ruling on non-alcoholic beer

Is it O.K. to drink non alcoholic beer?
The basic ruling on food and drink is that things are halaal, except
for those which are specifically described in sharee'ah as being
haraam, such as alcoholic drinks. If the drink includes any
intoxicating substance, it is haraam. On this basis it may be said
that beer (a drink made from barley), if it is intoxicating when drunk
in large amounts, then it is not permissible to drink it. It was
reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: "Every intoxicating substance is haraam."(Narrated by
al-Bukhaari, al-Ahkaam, 6637)And it was narrated that 'Aa'ishah said:
"The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: 'Every intoxicating substance is haraam, and whatever
intoxicates in large amounts, a handful of it is haraam.'"(Narrated by
al-Tirmidhi, al-Ashribah, 1789; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in
Saheeh Sunan al-Tirmidhi, 1521). Al-Teebi said: " 'a handful of it' is
an expression meaning a small amount." And Allaah knows best.

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Dought & clear, - Mouthwashes containing alcohol

I have been advised not to use Listerine, a kind of mouthwash, because
it contains some form of alcohol. However, if the kind of alcohol it
contains is not an intoxicant, is there some other reason for its
prohibition or would it be permissible to use it?
Praise be to Allaah.
If the alcohol which this mouthwash contains is not intoxicating, then
it is ok. to use it, so long as it is not harmful, because what is
haraam is only that which is intoxicating.
Shaykh Sa'd al-Humayd.
In this case we should look at the drink as a whole: if a lot of it
causes intoxication then a little of it is haraam.

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For children, - Prophet Job/ Ayyub (as) was always Content

Angel Jibril (Gabriel) came to Prophet Muhammed (saws) and said: O
Messenger of Allah! Allah (SWT) has sent you a gift which He has not
given to anyone before.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: What is that gift? Angel Jibril
(Gabriel) replied: It is patience.
But there is a virtue better than patience. Prophet Muhammed
(saws)asked: What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: It is
contentment.
There is still a virtue better than contentment. Prophet Muhammed
(saws) asked: What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: It is
pleasure of Allah (SWT).
But there is a virtue better than that. Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked:
What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: It is piety.
Yet there is a virtue better than that. Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked:
What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: It is devotion.
But there is a virtue better than that. Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked:
What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: Sure knowledge.
Yet there is a virtue better than that. Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked:
What is it? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: The way to attain all of
them is to put trust in Allah (SWT).
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked O Jibril (Gabriel)! What is the meaning
of putting trust in Allah (SWT)? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied:
Knowing that His creatures neither harm nor benefit anyone. They
neither give nor withhold anything. One must stop having hope in
creatures. When a man reaches this position, he will not do anything
save for Him, his heart does not go astray, he fears no one save Him
and he does not set his hope on anyone but Him. This is the meaning of
putting trust in Allah (SWT).
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: O Jibril (Gabriel)! What is the meaning
of patience? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: Man must have forbearance
and patience in afflictions as in joys. He should never complain of
His Creator to the people.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: What is the meaning of contentment?
Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: To be content with whatever in this
world and to thank Allah (SWT) for the small things he has.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: what is the meaning of pleasure of
Allah (SWT)? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: To be pleased with Allah
(SWT) but not to be pleased with one's own deeds.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: O Jibril (Gabriel)! What is the meaning
of piety? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: A pious man loves whatever
His creator loves and hates whatever He hates. He is careful about
what is lawful and leaves of what is unlawful, for what is lawful is
counted and what is unlawful will entail punishment. He has mercy on
every Muslim as he has on himself. He shuns useless words as he shuns
what is unlawful. He abstains from overeating as he keeps away from a
corpse with bad smell. He keeps away from the embellishments of world
as he keeps away from Fire. His desires are not far-fetched and death
is present before his eyes.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: O Jibril (Gabriel)! What is the meaning
of Devotion? Angel Jibril (Gabriel) replied: A devoted person is one
who does not ask for anything from people until he obtains it and
whenever he obtained it, he is pleased with it. Also if he has
something extra, he will give it away for the sake of Allah (SWT). The
fact that he does not ask for something from others is admittance of
his being a servant of Allah (SWT). He is pleased with Allah (SWT) and
Allah (SWT) is pleased with him. He gives away when he needs it more
than others.
Prophet Muhammed (saws) asked: What is sure knowledge? Angel Jibril
(Gabriel) replied: A man of sure knowledge acts in a way as if he sees
Allah (SWT). Even if he does not reach the degree of seeing Allah
(SWT), he knows that Allah (SWT) sees him and is sure that what he has
and what he has not is what Allah (SWT) wills.
These were some of signs of putting trust in Allah (SWT) and having piety.
Checkout Stress Management Techniques or Stress Relief Strategiesin Islam.

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Stop Complaining About Your Facebook Reach and Start Creating Content For Your Fans

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Personal, - Dispute and Arguments bring about Enmity

In sessions, forums and dialogue, it is easy to observe people engaged
in arguments, debate and disputes that may arouse discord and
hostility. This is an evil and incurable characteristic that occupies
many people.
Dispute is Part of Man's Nature
The Noble Quran clearly states that man is naturally argumentative,
despite the evidence, arguments, proofs, clear signs and varied
examples that he sees. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}And We
have certainly diversified in this Quran for the people from every
]kind of[ example; but man has ever been, most of anything, ]prone to[
dispute.{]Quran 18:54[
Two Types of Dispute
Disputes are either disliked or laudable. They can be commendable when
they are intended to show the truth, to direct others or to call them
to it. This is what Allaah The Almighty ordered the Prophet,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, to adopt. Allaah The Almighty Says
)what means(:
}Invite to the way of your Lord with wisdom and good instruction, and
argue with them in a way that is best. Indeed, your Lord is Most
Knowing of who has strayed from His way, and He is most knowing of who
is ]rightly[ guided.{]Quran 16:125[
}And do not argue with the People of the Scripture except in a way
that is best, except for those who commit injustice among them, and
say, "We believe in that which has been revealed to us and revealed to
you. And our God and your God is One; and we are Muslims ]in
submission[ to Him."{]Quran 29:46[
In this respect the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
said:"Struggle against disbelievers with your money, souls and
tongues."
'Abdullaah ibn 'Abbaas, may Allaah be pleased with them, debated with
the Khawaarij )an extreme sect in Islam( at the time of 'Ali ibn Abi
Taalib, may Allaah be pleased with him, in compliance with the
latter's order. Ibn 'Abbaas, may Allaah be pleased with him and his
father, informed and educated them beyond the excuse of ignorance and
then renounced them. Consequently, many of them renounced their
religious innovations. That was an example of a praiseworthy argument
that helps to show the truth with corroborative evidence.
Another kind of dispute, which is the subject of our discussion,
depends on falsehood, and it has many forms:
Dispute to Conceal the Truth
Dispute may be used to suppress the light of truth and to distract
people from it. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:
}And indeed do the devils inspire their allies ]among men[ to dispute
with you. And if you were to obey them, indeed, you would be
associators ]of others with Him[.{]Quran 6:121[
}They disputed by ]using[ falsehood to ]attempt to[ invalidate thereby
the truth. So I seized them, and how ]terrible[ was My Penalty.{]Quran
40:5[
}And among them are those who listen to you, but We have placed over
their hearts coverings, lest they understand it, and in their ears
deafness. And if they should see every sign, they will not believe in
it. Even when they come to you arguing with you, those who disbelieve
say, "This is not but legends of the former peoples."{]Quran 6:25[
Arrogance is the motivation behind this sort of dispute - the
arrogance that prevents people from accepting the truth and acting
upon it. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}Indeed, those who
dispute concerning the Signs of Allaah without ]any[ authority having
come to them - there is not within their breasts except pride, ]the
extent of[ which they cannot reach. So seek refuge in Allaah. Indeed,
it is He who is The Hearing, The Seeing.{]Quran 40:56[
This sort of dispute destroys, misleads, blinds and makes those who
practice it losers on the Day of Resurrection. Allaah The Almighty
Says )what means(:
}And of the people is he who disputes about Allaah without knowledge
and follows every rebellious devil. It has been decreed for every
devil that whoever turns to him - he will misguide him and will lead
him to the punishment of the Blaze.{]Quran 22:3-4[
}And of the people is he who disputes about Allaah without knowledge
or guidance or an enlightening book ]from Him[, twisting his neck ]in
arrogance[ to mislead ]people[ from the way of Allaah. For him in the
world is disgrace, and We will make him taste on the Day of
Resurrection the punishment of the Burning Fire.{]Quran 22:8-9[
Dispute in Showing One's Merit and Belittling Others
This is a great evil that few people manage to avoid. It is the habit
of many in their speaking as well as in their sessions and forums.
This sort of dispute is aroused by a person's feeling of superiority
and intelligence, and his attempts to deprecate the opinions of
others. This is a sign of deviation. The Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam, said:"No people have gone astray after the guidance
they used to follow except because of their engagement in
disputes."Then he recited the verse )which means(:}They did not
present the comparison except for ]mere[ argument. But, ]in fact[,
they are a people prone to dispute.{]Quran 43:58[ ]Ibn Maajah,
Al-Albaani - Hasan[
Allaah The Almighty does not like this kind of people. The Prophet,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"The most hated person in the
sight of Allaah is the most quarrelsome one."]Al-Bukhaari[
People who build their arguments upon falsehood expose themselves to
the wrath of Allaah The Exalted. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam, said:"If a person engages in a dispute based on falsehood
while he knows that it is falsehood, he incurs the wrath of Allaah on
himself until he stops."]Abu Daawood, Al-Albaani - Saheeh[
Knowing that this sort of dispute is difficult for people to avoid,
the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, assured those who abandon
it that they would thereby receive a magnificent reward; He,
sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"I guarantee a palace on the
outskirts of Paradise for a man who avoids quarrelling even if he is
right."]Abu Daawood, Al-Albaani - Hasan[
These people are in grave danger, and their attitude indicates
deviation in their hearts. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}It
is He who has sent down to you, ]O Muhammad[, the Book; in it are
verses ]that are[ precise - they are the foundation of the Book - and
others unspecific. As for those in whose hearts is deviation ]from
truth[, they will follow that of it which is unspecific, seeking
discord and seeking an interpretation ]suitable to them[. And no one
knows its ]true[ interpretation except Allaah. But those firm in
knowledge say, "We believe in it. All ]of it[ is from our Lord." And
no one will be reminded except those of understanding.{]Quran 2:7[ The
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, read this verse and said to
one of his wives:"O 'Aa`ishah, when you see those who dispute
concerning the Quran, be sure that they are whom Allaah intended here;
so beware of them."]Ibn Maajah, Al-Albaani - Saheeh[
Dispute Makes People Lose Out on Good
This sort of dispute causes the loss of good. 'Ubaadah ibn As-Saamit,
may Allaah be pleased with him, said, "The Prophet, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam, once came out to inform us about the ]date of the[
Night of Al-Qadr. However, a quarrel took place between two Muslim
men. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:'I had come out
to inform you about ]the date of[ the Night of Al-Qadr, but due to the
quarrel that occurred between so and so, its knowledge was taken away,
and maybe this is better for you. Now, look for it in the seventh, the
ninth and the fifth ]of the last ten nights of the month of
Ramadan[.'"]Al-Bukhaari[
As it leads to the loss of good and mars acts of worship, such
disputes were declared impermissible. Allaah The Almighty Says )what
means(:}Pilgrimage is ]during[ well-known months, so whoever had made
Pilgrimage obligatory upon himself therein ]by entering the state of
Ihraam[, there is ]to be for him[ no sexual relations and no
disobedience and no disputing during Pilgrimage.{]Quran 2:197[
With regards to fasting, the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
said:"When any one of you is fasting, he must not have sexual
relations..."and the wording that is narrated by Sa'eed ibn Mansoor, may
Allaah have mercy upon him, reads:"...He must not dispute."
This form of dispute causes grudges and enmity among people.
Disputing for Usurping the Rights of Others
The most evil form of all is disputing to usurp the rights of others.
The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"I am merely a human
being, and you ]disputants[ come to me with your cases. Someone may
present his case eloquently and in a more convincing way than another.
I give my verdict according to what I hear. So if ever I judge ]by
error[ and give the right of a brother to his other ]brother[, then he
]the latter[ should not take it, for I am giving him only a piece of
the Fire."]Al-Bukhaari[
A person from Hadhramawt and another from Kindah once came to the
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam. The one who came from
Hadhramawt said, "O Messenger of Allaah, this man has appropriated a
land which belonged to my father." The one who came from Kindah said,
"The land is mine and it is in my possession. I cultivate it and he
has no right to it." The Messenger, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
said to the Hadhramite:"Do you have any evidence ]to support you[?"He
replied in the negative. The Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
said:"Your case is then to be decided by his oath."The Hadhramite
said, "O Messenger of Allaah, he is a liar and cares not what he
swears and has no regard for anything." The Prophet, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam, remarked:"You have no right to demand anything from
him except that ]which you stated[."The man from Kindah then set out
to take an oath. When he left the Messenger, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam, said:"If he has taken an oath on his property to consume it
unjustly, he will certainly meet Allaah while He is turning away from
]i.e., shunning[ him."]Al-Bukhaari[
The Righteous Predecessors Warned Against Dispute
As disputes that are based on falsehood or not based on evidence
result in such previously-mentioned harms, the righteous warned
against disputes and advised us to avoid them. The following are some
reported citations in this regard.
Prophet Sulaymaan )Solomon(, may Allaah exalt his mention, said to one
of his sons, "Avoid dispute, for it is of little benefit, and it stirs
enmity among brothers."
Ibn 'Abbaas, may Allaah be pleased with him and his father, said,
"What a sinful action it is for you to be disputant."
Al-Awzaa'i, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, "If Allaah The
Almighty wants evil to befall some people, He keeps them in continuous
dispute and makes them stop doing ]good deeds[."
Muhammad ibn Husayn ibn 'Ali, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said,
"Dispute erases one's religion and implants enmity among people."
'Abdullaah ibn Al-Hasan ibn Al-Husayn, may Allaah have mercy upon him,
was asked, "What do you think of dispute?" He replied, "It spoils old
friendship and severs firm relations. It is at the very least a means
of overpowering others in argument, which is the strongest cause for
the severance of relations."
Ash-Shaafi'i, may Allaah have mercy upon him, said, "Dispute in
religion hardens hearts and causes grudges."
In the past, it was said, "Do not dispute with either a forbearing or
a foolish person - the former will overcome you and the latter will
harm you."
O Allaah, keep us away from dispute and the disputant, and help us to
be upright, and do not let our hearts deviate after You have guided
us.

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Personal, - Everything in the Universe tends to be Covered

Allaah The Almighty safeguarded the Earth with the atmosphere before
women lived on it wearing Hijaab )Islamic covering(. The Earth with
its atmosphere; all types of living cells; and all parts of the plants
ranging from seeds to fruits - are all covered.
A caterpillar starts its life in a cocoon; the skin covers the organs;
a corpse is shrouded in white pieces of cloth; and then buried under
the earth, men and women alike.
Inanimate objects are veiled:
A sword is kept in its sheath. When a pen loses its cap; its ink dries
up; it becomes useless and is thrown away to be trodden on, because it
lost its cap, which is the source of its protection. Why do our
children bind their books and notebooks? Is it to waste time or to
protect them? You put your head on a pillow which is kept clean
because of its case that protects it from dirt.
Living beings are veiled:
The cell is surrounded with double membranes, inside and outside, to
protect it and regulate the activity of its components.
* The plant cell
It is surrounded by a thick wall which supports it even after death.
* The animal cell
Vertebral cells exist in holes; bone cells are located in tubes; the
female ova is kept in the ovaries; the neurons )nerve cells( are long
and sheathed, so that they are protected from damage and being cut.
Every cell has its own cover; similarly, a woman has to have her
distinctive cover )Hijaab(.
Plants are veiled:
* The seed
Soil is the veil of the seed; it shelters the seed from the sunshine.
The seed lives in darkness in order to grow. The shell is a second
cover followed by a third one. The root has a growing top covered by a
cap whereby the root penetrates the soil.
Deep soil is better for the seed than the surface. Similarly, when a
woman covers herself, she rejects superficiality and thrives
spiritually; when she discards her Hijaab, she brings evil upon
herself and spreads corruption among the Ummah )Muslim nation(.
* The flower
The pistil is in the center of the blossom and is surrounded by petals
that protect it. Allaah The Almighty protects the pistil in this way.
Is the woman not entitled to such protection? What are the means of
this protection? Is not a woman who discards the Hijaab like a
beautiful flower, looking dazzling in her adornment, spreading her
fragrance, and attracting all kinds of creatures towards it? But all
flowers wither and mix with the dust - the difference is that the
flower has no reckoning, but human beings do. Would you like this end?
* The fruit
Consider: What happens to an apple when you cut part of it and leave
it? Why does a banana turn black after peeling it?
Animals are veiled:
* Sea animals
In the sea, we find various types of corals, shells and snails - all
of them form covers to guard mollusks. Surely, blessed Is Allaah, The
Creator, The Originator and The Fashioner!
* Land animals
The butterfly passes through different stages of development. It
receives a great command from the Allaah The Almighty, that it carries
it out. It secretes sticky threads, spins them, and weaves them to
produce a veil for the developing pupae inside a cocoon.
If an unthinking creature obeys the orders of Allaah the Almighty,
then how can a woman who is favored with reason and logic disobey
Allaah The Almighty?
Reptiles have scales; a hedgehog has sharp spines; a turtle carries a
big, heavy shell on its back throughout its life. A turtle has the
heaviest veil that bears witness to its patience. Which woman has the
most precious Hijaab? A woman who spends a fortune on a showy, costly
Hijaab which itself needs to be covered with another Hijaab in order
to be Islamically acceptable; or the modest garb of a woman who
desires the dress of Paradise?
Covers vary from one animal to another, and they may vary among the
same species according to the needs of the animal.
Young birds are protected by the fragile shell of the egg that can
easily break. So, women should not claim that Hijaab is merely a piece
of cloth, for this piece of cloth is sufficient to protect you -
Allaah willing. Eggs hatch, letting chicks come out with light fluffy
hair which later develop into long feathers that protect the bird.
Humans are veiled:
Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}He creates you in the wombs of
your mothers, creation after creation, within three darknesses.{]Quran
39:6[
* The fetus in its mother's womb
The fetus remains safe in its mother's womb for nine months, and the
womb is surrounded by membranes and layers. The three types of
darkness are: darkness of the placenta, darkness of the womb's wall,
and darkness of the walls of the belly.
These membranes provide the fetus with comfort, security, food and oxygen.
* Veils in the man's body
The diaphragm exists in the body and separates the heart and the lungs
from the rest of the organs. It perfectly performs its function
because it is thick, and neither light nor transparent.
On the contrary a woman's Hijaab nowadays is light and revealing the
details of the body. Not only is the woman's Hijaab transparent, but
it is also revealing - as if it were designed to allure, not to
conceal - thus, belying its very purpose.
* The skeleton
It consists of a hard, protective skull where the brain is located.
The brain is the man's treasure, because it is the site of the mental
faculties which distinguish him from animals, and it is located
securely inside a bony container. A skillful doctor's lancet cannot
reach it except after sawing the skull. It is a mighty safe given to
the rich and the poor, and is similar to an iron safe where precious
jewels are kept. Allaah The Almighty Says )what means(:}...And in
yourselves. Then will you not see?{]Quran 51:21[
* The heart
The heart is like a gift wrapped in multiple layers. There are five
soldiers guarding it: the pericardium, which is light; two soft lungs
surrounding it; a breastbone securely containing them; muscles and
tissues garmenting the breastbone; all of which is covered with
protective skin. Likewise, the mercy, love and wisdom of our Lord
encircles us, so He legislated Hijaab for us.
* The eye
The eye is the most valuable item man possesses. It is like a ball
that fits in the eye sockets to protect it from injury. A woman, like
the eye, puts on Hijaab to guard herself from being exploited as a sex
object. People who misuse the faculties granted by Allaah The Almighty
start with an unlawful look at a non-Mahram )marriageable( woman,
followed by a smile, then a greeting, then a conversation, then a
date, then a meeting, then impermissible exposure of adornments and
free intermixing. The result usually is committing unlawful sex,
diseases, shame, destruction, and finally torment in Hell. Allaah The
Almighty Says )what means(:}Tell the believing men to reduce ]some[ of
their vision and guard their private parts. That is purer for
them.{]Quran 24:30[
* The skin
The skin is a thick tissue which covers the body entirely and hides
the bones, muscles, blood vessels, and so on. Let the woman imagine:
If the skin had been transparent and showing what is under it, what
would people have looked like? Allaah The Almighty Says )what
means(:}We have certainly created man in the best of stature.{]Quran
95:4[
You sterilize the wounds on your skin in order to protect your body;
however, Hijaab protects both your body and soul. How could you
carelessly and indifferently discard it? With your Hijaab, you are a
representative of Islam, a role model for others, and a guide for the
whole world to the existence of a great religion.
With Hijaab, you are a protected jewel, and without it, you are like a
sweet left uncovered for flies to land on. Are you a commodity for
sale, or a corpse on which bacteria and worms gather? No. By Allaah,
you are a well-protected pearl.
So, put on your Hijaab, because everything in the Universe is covered.
Do not behave at odds with laws of the Universe, for deviation leads
to The Fire.

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Regards,
NAJIMUDEEN M/
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Personal, - The Benefits of Purposeful Socializing

A Muslim woman should not say, "What do I have to do with people? I
leave them alone and I do not interfere in their private affairs." We
are required to do take an interest in the well-being of our fellow
Muslims in permissible worldly matters, even though a part of the
perfection of one's Islam is his leaving that which does not concern
him. As for matters which imply certain danger to the morals of others
)even if they are worldly matters( one is required to offer advice,
because offering advice with whole-hearted concern is an essential
pillar of the religion.
A believing woman is required to offer advice and invite people to her
religion as much as she can. The story of the noble Companion, Umm
Sulaym, may Allaah be pleased with her, in this respect is a wonderful
example:
Umm Sulaym, the mother of Anas ibn Maalik, may Allaah be pleased with
them, was one of the early converts to Islam from among the Ansaar
)Helpers(. After her husband's death, Abu Talhah, may Allaah be
pleased with him, proposed to her when he was still a polytheist. She
said to him, "O Abu Talhah, do you not know that this deity whom you
worship grew out of the earth?" "Of course," he answered. She said,
"Do you not feel ashamed to worship a tree? If you become a Muslim, I
will accept you as a husband, and will not ask for dowry other than
your acceptance of Islam." He replied, "I will think about the
matter." He went out and then returned saying, "I bear witness that
there is none worthy of worship but Allaah and that Muhammad is the
Messenger of Allaah." Thereupon, she said to Anas, may Allaah be
pleased with him, "O Anas, approve the marriage proposal of Abu
Talhah," so Anas, may Allaah be pleased with him, gave her away in
marriage to him. ]Al-Haakim[
It was a noble dowry for a woman who was a noble caller to Allaah. She
called Abu Talhah, may Allaah be pleased with him, to worship Allaah
Alone and abandon polytheism. Allaah The Almighty opened his heart for
Islam and accepted it, and what a noble dowry it was!
The Children of Isra'eel were destroyed because they abandoned the
virtue of enjoining good and forbidding evil. Allaah The Exalted Says
)what means(:}They used not to prevent one another from wrongdoing
that they did. How wretched was that which they were doing.{]Quran 5:
79[
To avoid people due to the belief that they are not righteous, is like
the old adage which says, "The last resort for curing is
cauterization." That is because when we avoid people because we feel
that our souls are purer than theirs, our hearts, characters and
intellects are better than theirs, in such a case we have not
accomplished anything constructive or beneficial. Rather, we have
chosen for ourselves the easiest road that requires the least effort.
Real greatness is when one intermixes with those people, is filled
with a spirit of tolerance and sympathy for their weakness,
non-observance and mistakes, as well as a spirit of true willingness
to purify, educate and elevate them to a higher level as much as we
are able.
As such, when a pious woman adheres to righteousness and is committed
to the Sunnah )tradition( and firmly follows it, she is required to
contribute in calling to what is good among women. This is a religious
obligation and a woman is considered guilty if she falls short in
this. Regardless of one's level of piety, each one is required to do
as much as one can for the cause of Islamic propagation, using kind
words and wisdom. Addressing His Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam, Allaah The Exalted Says )what means(:}So by mercy from Allaah,
]O Muhammad[, you were lenient with them. And if you had been rude ]in
speech[ and harsh in heart, they would have disbanded from about
you.{]Quran 3: 159[
She is kind to those who are around her, respects the old and is
merciful to the young. She does not forget that she seeks a sublime
goal and exerts her best to achieve it using a manner that satisfies
Allaah The Almighty and leads to successful results.
As such, our call should be in conformity with the verse in which
Allaah The Exalted Says )what means(:}Call to the way of your Lord
with wisdom and good instruction, and argue with them in a way that is
best.{]Quran 16: 125[
* Reconciliation among believing women:
When the devil works to sow seeds of enmity among Muslim women, we
should eliminate it by reconciling them. Eliminating enmity stands as
evidence behind the sublimity of the soul which works to spread
affection and love among others. In doing so, concord replaces
disputes and maintaining ties replaces boycott. That is why the degree
of the person who reconciles people is better than the one who
constantly performs voluntary fasting, prayer and charity.
It was narrated on the authority of Abu Ad-Dardaa', may Allaah be
pleased with him, that he said, "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu
'alayhi wa sallam, said:'Shall I tell you a virtue better than
voluntary prayers, fasting and charity?'They )the Companions, may
Allaah be pleased with them( replied in the affirmative. He
said:'Reconciling people, for hatred and enmity uproot good deeds,
just as a razor removes hair.'"]Al-Bukhaari, Muslim[
According to another narration, the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa
sallam, said:"It )hatred and enmity( is the razor. I do not say that
it shaves off hair, but it shaves off religion."
That is because planting enmity among others leads to desertion and
cutting off ties among Muslims which is prohibited under Sharee'ah. It
was narrated that the Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"It
is not permissible for a Muslim to desert his )Muslim( brother for
more than three days. They meet each other and both of them turn away,
but the best of them is the one who starts with the greeting of
peace."]Al-Bukhaari, Muslim[
Warning against grudge and desertion and indicating that Allaah Is
Angry with the disputing persons until they agree to reconcile, the
Prophet, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"The gates of Paradise
are opened on Mondays and on Thursdays, and every servant ]of Allaah[
who associates nothing with Allaah will be forgiven, except for the
man who has a grudge against his brother. ]About them[ it will be
said, 'Delay these two until they are reconciled,' thrice."]Muslim[
When alienation occurs between two Muslim women, we should hasten to
reconcile them and encourage them to overlook each other's faults. A
Muslim woman is required to accept her Muslim sister's apology and not
turn her face away insisting on desertion and declining to accept her
apology. As the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam,
indicated, the worst among people are those who neither overlook
faults nor accept an apology.
It was narrated on the authority of Ibn 'Abbaas, may Allaah be pleased
with him, that he said,
The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"Shall I
tell you who are the worst of people?"They )the Companions, may Allaah
be pleased with them( said, "Yes, if you wish, O Messenger of Allaah."
He said:"The worst among you is the person who distances himself from
others; and who whips his slave; and does not give in charity. Shall I
tell you who is worse than that?"They said, "Yes, if you wish, O
Messenger of Allaah." He said:"He is the person who hates people and
they hate him. Shall I tell you who is worse than that?"They said,
"Yes, if you wish, O Messenger of Allaah." He said:"Those who neither
overlook any mistake, nor accept apologies, nor forgive faults. Shall
I tell you who is worse than that?"They said: "Yes, if you wish, O
Messenger of Allaah." He said:"It is the person whom others give up on
him and do not expect any good from him, and are fearful of the harm
that comes from him."]At-Tabaraani[
The role of Muslim women in achieving reform is summarized in the following:
* Reforming yourself by getting rid of ignorance and purifying your
faith by obligatory and voluntary acts of worship as well as
increasing in obedience to Allaah The Almighty day by day.
* Reforming the affairs of your family and raising your children upon religion.
* Reforming your Muslim sisters in two ways:
a- Directing to what is good.
b- Establishing and maintaining close ties with them through
reconciliation and exchanging visits with them.
Finally, you should know that you are very important and that you play
a great role in this Ummah. Do not imagine that you are marginalized
or at the periphery of community life. Rather, you are half of this
Ummah and you are responsible for producing and raising the other
half. You are a whole nation.
When you are reformed, and with your attempts to reform others the
Muslim Ummah is reformed and our status quo will change. Therefore,
you should fulfill this responsibility and your reward will be
Paradise, Allaah Willing.

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Regards,
NAJIMUDEEN M/
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Dought & clear, - Woe to the drinker of wine

A girl drank alcohol before Ramadaan began, then she started to fast
at the beginning of Ramadaan, but one of the sisters told her that her
fasting would be rejected and that Allaah would not accept it because
she had drunk wine recently, and that she had to wait forty days
before Allaah would accept her prayer and fasting. Is this true? May
Allaah reward you with good.
Praise be to Allaah.
Drinking alcohol is a major sin, for wine is the mother of all evils.
It clouds the mind, wastes money, causes headaches, tastes foul, and
is an abomination of the Shaytaan's [Satan's] handiwork. It creates
enmity and hatred between people, prevents them from remembering
Allaah and praying, calls them to zina [unlawful sexual
relationships], and may even call them to commit incest with their
daughters, sisters or other female relatives. It takes away pride and
protective jealousy (gheerah), and generates shame, regret and
disgrace, and puts the drinker in the same category as the most
imperfect type of people, namely those who are insane. It leads to the
disclosure of secrets and exposure of faults. It encourages people to
commit sins and evil actions. It makes people transgress sacred limits
and the one who is addicted to it is like an idol-worshipper.
How many wars has it started, how many rich men has it made poor, how
many noble people has it brought low, how many blessings has it
destroyed, how many disasters has it caused?
How often has it created division between man and wife?
How much regret has it generated and how many tears has it caused to flow?
How often has it closed the doors of goodness to the drinker and
opened the doors of evil to him?
How often has it brought about calamity and hastened death?
How much trouble has it brought to the one who drinks it?
It is the source of sin, the key to evil; it takes away blessings and
brings calamity.
Even if it did not have all these evil consequences, the fact that one
cannot have both the wine of this world and the wine of Paradise is
sufficient deterrent.
And the evil consequences of alcohol are many time more than we have mentioned.
From the words of Ibn al-Qayyim inHaadi al-Arwaah.
Allaah has warned us against it in His Book and on the lips of His
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
1 - Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
"O you who believe! Intoxicants (all kinds of alcoholic drinks), and
gambling, and Al-Ansaab (stone altars for sacrifices to idols, jinn,
etc), and Al-Azlaam (arrows for seeking luck or decision) are an
abomination of Shaytaan's (Satan's) handiwork. So avoid (strictly all)
that (abomination) in order that you may be successful"
[al-Maa'idah 5:90]
2 - Allaah has cursed the drinker of alcohol. InSunan Abi Dawood(3189)
it is narrated that Ibn 'Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: "Allaah has cursed alcohol, the one who drinks it, the one who
pours it, the one who sells it, the one who buys it, the one squeezes
(the grapes, etc), the one for whom it is squeezed, the one who
carries it and the one to whom it is carried." Classed as saheeh by
al-Albaani as stated inSaheeh Abi Dawood, 2/700.
3 - The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) likened
the one who is addicted to alcohol to one who worships idols. It was
narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "The one who is addicted to
alcohol is like one who worships an idol." Narrated by Ibn Maajah,
3375; classed as hasan by al-Albaani inSaheeh Ibn Maajah, 2720.
4 - The one who is addicted to alcohol will be denied admission to
Paradise. It was narrated from Abu'l-Darda' that the Prophet (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "No one who is addicted to
alcohol will enter Paradise." Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 3376; classed as
saheeh by al-Albaani as stated inSaheeh Ibn Maajah, 2721.
5 - It was narrated that 'Uthmaan (may Allaah be pleased with him)
said: "Avoid alcohol for it is the mother of all evils. There was a
man among the people who came before you who was a devoted worshipper.
A seductive woman fell in love with him, and she sent her slave-woman
to him to call him to bear witness. He went with the slave-woman, and
every time they passed through a door, she locked it behind them,
until he reached a beautiful woman with whom was a child and a vessel
of wine. She said, 'I did not call you to bear witness, rather I
called you either to have intercourse with me, or to drink a cup of
this wine, or to kill this child.' He said, 'Pour me some of this
wine.' So she poured him a cup, then he said, 'Give me more,' and he
did not stop until he had has intercourse with her and killed the
child. So avoid alcohol, for by Allaah faith and addiction to wine
cannot be combined except soon one of them will be expelled."
Narrated by al-Nasaa'i, 5666; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh
al-Nasaa'i, 5236.
6 - His prayers will not be accepted for forty days. It was narrated
that 'Abd-Allaah ibn 'Amr said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever drinks alcohol and
gets drunk, his prayers will not be accepted for forty days, and if he
dies he will go to Hell, but if he repents, Allaah will accept his
repentance. If he drinks wine again and gets drunk, his prayer will
not be accepted for forty days, and if he dies he will go to Hell, but
if he repents, Allaah will accept his repentance. If he drinks wine
again and gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days,
and if he dies he will go to Hell, but if he repents, Allaah will
accept his repentance. If he does that again, Allaah will give him to
drink of the mud of khabaal on the Day of Resurrection." They said, "O
Messenger of Allaah, what is the mud of khabaal?" He said, "The juice
of the people of Hell." Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 3377; classed as
saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh Ibn Maajah, 2722.
The fact that his prayers are not accepted does not mean that the
person's prayers are invalid, or that he should give up prayer. Rather
what it means is that he will not be rewarded for them. So the purpose
of his prayer is to fulfil his duty and to avoid the punishment for
not praying.
Abu 'Abd-Allaah ibn Mandah said: The phrase "his prayers will not be
accepted" means that he will not be rewarded for his prayers for forty
days, as a punishment for drinking alcohol. This is like what they
said about the one who speaks when the imam is delivering the khutbah
on Friday: he prays Jumu'ah [Friday prayer] but there is no Jumu'ah
for him, meaning that he will not be given the reward for praying
Jumu'ah, as a punishment for his sin.
Ta'zeem Qadr al-Salaah, 2/587, 588. See also Question no, 20037
Al-Nawawi said:
With regard to his prayer not being accepted, what this means is that
he will not be rewarded for it, even though it is valid, and he does
not have to repeat it.
With regard to what the questioner was told about her fasting not
being accepted, this is based on the view of some of the scholars that
the mention of prayer in the hadeeth quoted above is a warning that no
other acts of worship will be accepted either.
Al-Mubaarakfoori said inTuhfat al-Ahwadhi:
It is said that prayer was singled out for mention because it is the
best physical act of worship, and if it is not accepted, it is more
likely that other acts of worship will not be accepted either.
Al-'Iraaqi and al-Mannaawi also said something similar.
Based on this view, fasting is not accepted either, but this does not
mean that the person who drank alcohol should not fast, rather he is
enjoined to fast, but it will not be accepted from him, as a rebuke.
Undoubtedly the person who drinks alcohol should still offer the
prayers on time, and fast in Ramadaan. If he omits some of his prayer
or fasting, he will be committing a major sin that is even greater
than the sin of drinking alcohol.
It should be noted that if a Muslim commits sin and is unable to
repent because of his weakness of faith, that should not be used to
justify his persisting in sin or his addiction, or his neglecting to
do acts of worship. Rather he has to do whatever he can of acts of
worship and strive to give up the sins that he is committing.
The Muslim has to fear Allaah and beware of the wiles and snares of
the Shaytaan [Satan]. He should not let his soul become a plaything of
the Shaytaan. If his Shaytaan overpowers him and makes him fall into
sin and disobedience towards his Creator, then he must hasten to
repent, for "the one who repents is like the one who did not sin."
Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 2450; classed as saheeh by al-Busayri as
stated inal-Zawaa'id Haashiyat Sunan Ibn Maajah.
This punishment for the one who drinks alcohol applies to the one who
does not repent. As for the one who repents and turns to Allaah,
Allaah will accept his repentance and accept his good deeds.
We ask Allaah to protect us from the tricks of the Shaytaan and to
help us avoid temptations both obvious and hidden.
Praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the Worlds.

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Regards,
NAJIMUDEEN M/
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Dought & clear, - Will the prayers of one who drinks alcohol not be accepted for forty days?

Is the report narrated from the Messenger of Allaah Muhammad (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him), which says that whoever drinks
alcohol, his prayers will not be accepted for a period of forty days,
saheeh?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Yes, there are many saheeh ahaadeeth concerning the punishment for one
who drinks alcohol, which say that his prayers will not be accepted
for forty days. This was narrated from 'Amr ibn al-'Aas, Ibn 'Abbaas,
Ibn 'Umar and Ibn 'Amr.
Seeal-Silsilah al-Saheehah, 709, 2039, 2695, 1854.
One of these ahaadeeth was narrated by Ibn Maajah (3377) from
'Abd-Allaah ibn 'Amr who said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "Whoever drinks alcohol and
gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days and if he
dies he will go to Hell. But if he repents, Allaah will accept his
repentance. If he again drinks alcohol and gets drunk, his prayer will
not be accepted for forty days and if he dies he will go to Hell. But
if he repents, Allaah will accept his repentance. If he again drinks
alcohol and gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days
and if he dies he will go to Hell. But if he repents, Allaah will
accept his repentance. If he commits (this sin) again, then Allaah
pledges to make him drink the mud of khabaal on the Day of
Resurrection." They asked, "O Messenger of Allaah, what is the mud of
khabaal?" He said, "The juices of the people of Hell."
Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh Ibn Maajah.
The fact that his prayers are not accepted does not mean that they are
not valid, or that he should give up praying, rather it means that he
will not be rewarded for them.
So the benefit of praying will be that he will have discharged his
duty and will not be punished for not doing it.
Abu 'Abd-Allaah ibn Mandah said: The words "his prayer will not be
accepted" mean that he will not be rewarded for his prayer for forty
days, as a punishment for his drinking alcohol, just as they say that
the one who speaks on Friday when the imam is delivering the khutbah
should pray Jumu'ah but there is no Jumu'ah for him, meaning that he
will not be given the reward for Jumu'ah as a punishment for his sin.
Ta'zeem Qadr al- Salaah, 2/587, 588. See also question no. 20037.
Al-Nawawi said:
With regard to his prayer not being accepted, what this means is that
he will not be rewarded for it, even though it is valid in the sense
that he has discharged his duty and does not need to repeat it. End
quote.
No doubt the person who drinks alcohol still has to perform the
prayers on time. If he were to delay any of his prayers, he would be
committing a grave major sin, which is worse than the sin of drinking
alcohol.
This punishment for drinking alcohol applies to the one who does not
repent. But if he repents to Allaah and turns to Him, He will accept
his repentance and accept his good deeds, as it says in the hadeeth
quoted above: "... but if he repents, Allaah will accept his
repentance." And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: "The one who repents from sin is like one who did not
commit sin." Narrated by Ibn Maajah, 4250; classed as hasan by
al-Albaani inSaheeh Ibn Maajah.
And Allaah knows best.

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Regards,
NAJIMUDEEN M/
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