For children, - Hatred in Islam, Diseases of the Soul

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Hatred is an emotion of intense revulsion, distaste, enmity, or antipathy for a person, thing, or phenomenon, generally attributed to a desire to avoid, restrict, remove, or destroy the hated object. Hatred is also among the most common emotions that human's experience. It can be based on fear of an object or past negative consequences of dealing with that object. Hatred is often described as the opposite of love or friendship.
Often the verb "to hate" is used casually to describe things one merely dislikes, such as a particular style of architecture, a certain climate, one's job, some particular food, or people who claim to hate something when they in fact merely dislike it.
"Hatred" is also used to describe feelings of prejudice, bigotry or condemnation against a person, or a group of people, such as racism, and intense religious or political prejudice. The term hate crime is used to designate crimes committed out of hatred in this sense.
Religion Islam has been accused unjustly of being a religion of hate by those who never made a true effort to understand even the basic teachings of Islam. We all know that ignorance is the worst enemy of the truth, and Allah (SWT) asked us to learn the truth as there is nothing after the truth except falsehood.
This then is Allah, your true Lord; and what is there after the truth but error; how are you then turned back? Noble Qur'an (10:32)
Let us present the simple truth about Islam and the Noble Qur'an that proves that Islam is not a religion of hate but rather a religion of love, tolerance, understanding, and social justice.
Many people are not aware that Islam is the religion of Prophet Abraham, not the religion of Prophet Muhammad. Prophet Abraham, being the founder of Islam, with all its beautiful and peaceful teachings and rituals, passed his religion to all the prophets who came after him, including all the Israeli prophets, Prophet Moses, Prophet Jesus and Prophet Muhammad. Those attacking Islam, out of ignorance, or deliberately, are attacking Prophet Abraham who is their prophet as much as the prophet of the Muslims.
Noble Qur'an explains clearly this fact,
And strive hard in (the way of) Allah, (such) a striving a is due to Him; He has chosen you and has not laid upon you an hardship in religion; the faith of your father Abraham; He named you Muslims before and in this, that the Messenger may be a bearer of witness to you, and you may be bearers of witness to the people... Noble Qur'an (22:78)
Abraham was neither a Jew nor a Christian but he was (an) upright (man), a Muslim, and he was not one of the polytheists. Most surely the nearest of people to Abraham are those who followed him and this Prophet and those who believe and Allah is the guardian of the believers. Noble Qur'an (3:67-68)
Then We revealed to you (O Muhammad): Follow the faith of Abraham, the upright one, and he was not of the polytheists. Noble Qur'an (16:123)
In that simple sense, how can Islam which is the religion of Abraham promote hate when it is the same religion passed down to the Jews and Christians before reaching Muslims? How can the Jews and Christians claim different standard when we are talking about the same religion with different names but all go back to Abraham.
Noble Qur'an, the final Testament, made a special mention of the relationship that controls the social and daily life with other people including but not limited to Jews and Christians. In it Noble Qur'an urges the Muslims to be loving, caring, friendly, patient, tolerant, advocates of freedom, democracy, and social justice. Islam never advocated hate or promoted it. People, who promote hate, do so on their own terms and misunderstanding. By doing so they do not represent Islam or the teachings of Islam in the scripture.
We need to remember that hate is a man made crime that we should not blame on any religion. Any claim of hate in a religion is no more than man made innovation that has nothing to do with God or His scripture. Planting hate only produces hate. Planting love, will produce love. Our God is Almighty, all loving.








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Personal, - How to Handle Burdens

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We all have stress and burdens in our daily lives. Whether it is school or work or just the trials of life, we carry much on our shoulders. Some of us carry our own loads and some of us carry loads that we share with others, such as health problems, personal family issues, financial dilemmas, marital discord, employment troubles, and the list could go on. These burdens that we bear can be heavy. In fact, most of us may say that at one time or another, these burdens are too hard to bear.
But, in Chapter two ]Quran 2[, Allaah Almighty promises us that we will never have to carry a burden that is greater than what we can bear. So why do we feel then that the burden is too heavy for us to carry? Why do we feel as if we had the weight of the entire world on our shoulders and as if we had more than our share of worries and woes?
We feel this way not because of the weight of the burden, but rather the way we carry it.
Bend at the knees
When we physically carry heavy loads in our arms, we are always told to `bend at the knees' to avoid breaking our backs and injuring our necks. There is great wisdom in ensuring that something is sincerely done in our own best interest, and not just done as a task that we want to get rid of. Likewise, a burden that is carried with little or no care or concern for our own well-being does not make much sense. In a short amount of time, one would `burn out' and be of much less use to the same people that we were intending to help in the first place. So, a burden carried on our shoulders should be carried with care as well, otherwise it could similarly become a `pain in the neck'. In other words, a burden on its own is not such a pain but a mere responsibility; but a burden that is not carried well becomes a pain, a hassle that one harbors reluctantly.
No matter how heavy our burden is, if we carry it with confidence and self respect, we can handle the weight of it and carry it to fruition or to the point that it needs to be carried.
Sometimes, this weight that we carry is for a short period and sometimes it is for a long period; whatever the duration, our attitude determines in large part the outcome. The way that we handle any situation determines how that situation can end. Think about many of the burdens that you may have in your life at this very moment. The way you see them can have a huge impact on the way they affect your life. If you think they are enormous, then you tend to visualize them as such.
If you imagine that it is the end of the world, you would probably feel as if the world was about to come crashing down on you.
Instead, if we can remember at times like this that there is no such thing as a burden too great, we can take a deep breath and remind ourselves that we can handle it. We have to remember that Allaah Almighty Knows what we can handle. After all, He Almighty created us and thus Knows better than anyone else what we can and cannot handle.
Pulling our own weight
In remembering this, it would be better for us to handle our responsibilities not with complaints and grouchiness but with self-restraint and grace. The burdens placed on our shoulders should not weigh us down to the point of immobility. Instead, we can think of them as challenges that we can learn to face and overcome. The reality is that, no matter how bad the situation is, there is always someone out there whose situation is harder than ours. Maybe we can't see that person when we need to, but we need to know that this reality exists and that our own burdens are meant for us. The burden of other people could be much worse.
All of the burdens that we have are a test from Allaah Almighty—we know that already. What we sometimes forget is how to handle those burdens. Usually, we complain about everything that is ‘going wrong’ in our lives. If we can change our perspective and balance those burdens with a stronger back and with a more positive attitude, we will see that the burden is not as heavy as the reward for being grateful for those things that we have in our lives that are going well.










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Personal, - It’s about time

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Since the beginning of time, someone else has been controlling your time, or rather your timeliness. When we were younger, our parents determined when we got to school and how early or late we were. They helped us to dress and get ready, and we were under their control.
Then, as we got older, we gained some of our own independence, but then, many women get married and then their control over their time is not their own again.
The hours in their day are not necessarily their own. Whether it is reporting to work by a certain time, dropping kids off to school by a certain time, or even preparing breakfast for yourself and hubby before you and he go off to work, all this requires you to have something done by a certain time. This requires punctuality.
One of the hardest habits in life to master seems to be punctuality. Many of us can juggle all that life throws our way, from jobs, to marriage, to kids, but when it comes to handling all of this in a timely manner, some of us fall short. Most of us remember being late to school as children, running around our homes looking for our homework or our shoes. Asking our moms where we put our jackets. Why were we always late? Then, we grew up and got to college or started working and still made it just in the nick of time, barely there before our boss could check the clock. Or we would slide into our college desks just as the professor began to lecture or pass out the test papers.
Why is that most of us are habitually late, not just for work or school, but in many other aspects of our lives?
More importantly, what can we do as women of the house for our families and for ourselves to break this cycle of perpetual procrastination and everlasting tardiness?
Practicing punctuality in practically everything
In everything we do, from the moment we rise, we should practice punctuality. Our priorities should incorporate timeliness and reliability in all aspects of our daily activities. Actually, there is probably little or nothing that doesn't require or could not benefit from our promptness.
Performing Responsibilities with Regularity
This is the most common area of procrastination in that this is where most of us are guilty. Sometimes, some of us develop over the years an "I'll do it later" attitude and we begin to procrastinate in our duties, from the small to the large ones. We begin to put off the laundry until it accumulates and spills over the basket; we allow the dishes to pile up in the sink and then get that sinking feeling in our stomachs as we are elbow deep days later in greasy dishwater. We are up late the night before a big test because we delay studying until the last minute; we can actually put off –anything and everything –all errands, all chores, all duties and responsibilities. But should we?
No, rather we should try to perform our duties as soon as possible. This is best for us in many ways.
1. We can get accomplished what needs to be done and get on with our other obligations.
2. We can do a better job by giving ourselves ample time.
3. We can set a good example for our families by showing them that we take our responsibilities seriously. If they see that we procrastinate, they may take that to mean neglect.
4. Promptness leads to consistency.
As the woman of the household, there are many responsibilities that rest on our shoulders. If we can avoid procrastination, we prevent that over-whelming burden of feeling as if we are always `falling behind' in our housework, in our schoolwork, in our errands, in everything that gets to be too much for us.
Punctuality in Worship
As Muslim women we cannot, however, let domestic responsibilities and duties as wife, mother, and even student or professional prevent us from worshipping Allaah punctually, at the right time and with the right intentions. This specifically refers to, but is by no means limited to, prayer. Performing our prayers at their appointed times and with conviction is essential to living life in the best possible way and setting the best example for our families.
One of the first things that we do in the morning and unquestionably the most important activity of the day is prayer, which not only benefits from punctuality but requires it. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, was asked "What deed is most beloved by Allaah?; and he answered, “To offer each prayer as soon as it is due.”
Punctuality in performing the prayer means that we drop the dishes )not literally( to offer it when it is due, make sure to do it before we pick up the kids from school if possible, make it at the office if need be, make it at school; whenever its time is due, we must rise to offer it.
The prayer is not the only form of worship that benefits from punctuality: Duaa is a significant form of worship for which punctuality and timeliness is integral. Forms of Duaa like the Istikhaarah prayer and others for thankfulness and Tawbah should be offered at the right time for maximum benefit. Similarly, paying Zakaah is another form of worship for which timing could mean everything, especially for those whom the charity could benefit. For example, when we donate money at a fundraiser for a particular cause, the amount of money that we give at that particular time is imperative for that specific cause. We can make plans to give and donate, but if we do not actually do it when it matters, it does not count. The key is to do it and do it exactly when it can generate maximum benefit. For those in need, timing is everything.
Reliability in Relationships
Timing is key for relationships as well as worship. However, for some odd reason, people have the tendency to take relationships for granted. We make them and then assume that they will last; that they do not require any or much upkeep. As women though, we should know that this is not true and to maintain healthy and happy relationships with all who are close to us, we have to work at it regularly and consistently. This means that we have to be one step ahead of crises. Women know that emotions rage strong and can come between two people.
Therefore, it is imperative that we remain steadfast in our efforts to maintain our relationships to the extent that we desire. In other words, our relationships with our spouse, our parents, our children, our friends, and anyone who means anything to us require effort. In order for us to ensure that these relationships remain healthy, we have to be punctual in handling issues as they arise. Think about your most recent and significant disagreement you might have had with your spouse or parent or child. If you might have dealt with it immediately, could you have eliminated the problem or significantly decreased the problem? Maybe you and a friend had a little disagreement. You feel a bit annoyed and decide that it is better to not bring it up again, but of course, you still feel upset about the situation. You hesitate handling the situation immediately because you feel that it might just `wash over' and that it will be forgiven and forgotten soon enough. However, we all know that most women do not function that way.
Many people have too strong of a memory to forget anything until it has been worked through and talked through and true forgiveness has been reached.
Sometimes, women have a tendency of ignoring sticky situations that are emotionally charged; we are hesitant to deal with issues that negatively affect our relationships. However, this is dangerous in that it could prolong the inevitable and make a small problem worse. As is the case with most situations, procrastination is not such a great idea. On the contrary, punctuality is probably the best way to abate any long term crises. This is one of the reasons the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, gave so much advice against breaking off ties. For example, he said,"There should be no breaking off of ties, no turning away from one another, no hating one another, and no envying one another. Be brothers )and sisters(, as Allaah has commanded you."]Muslim[ Because anger may strike women )and of course men( at times of emotional weakness, Islam allows three days as a reasonable length of time during which anger may subside.
As difficult as it may seem, whether we are dealing with our chores, our personal worship, or with our relationships, it is best for us to deal with the situation as soon as possible and `nip it in the bud.'








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