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Monday, November 25, 2013

Islamic Marriage Articles, - Marriage to a Past















Parents Should Not Reject a Proposal Without Good Reason - and Being a Revert with a Past is Not an Acceptable One
Should a Muslim marry or even consider marriage to a revert to Islam, since he or she would have a past that include premarital sex? Should a married revert divorce a spouse that does not revert?
Many parents become upset if their children wish to marry outside their culture, although Islam allows and even encourages this, as long as both parties are Muslim. For example, parents worry about differences in schools of thought, nationalities, and non-extended family members. Since Muslims tend to gravitate toward others of a similar type, one would imagine that a marriage between, say, a Sufi and a Salafi stands little chance of success.
About a "Past"
When he married, the Prophet (salla Allahu 'alayhi wa sallam) did not seek young virgins, women with no previous sexual experience, or members of his family. Since neither he nor Khadijah were Muslims at the time they married, the question of being Muslim did not arise.
( Zawaj.com Editor's Note: while the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) before the appointment of the Prophethood was not a "Muslim" in the sense we understand it today, he was aHaneef- a follower of the pure way of Ibraheem (alayhis-salaam). He rejected idol worship, and he meditated and prayed deeply, trying to learn and know the manner in which he should worship Allah. In addition, he rejected all the corrupt practices of Arab society at the time, such as fornication, drinking, gambling, etc. So in the broader sense he was definitely a Muslim and a true seeker of truth.)
Muhammad's (pbuh) first choice was a twice-married 40-year-old lady with at least 4 children. Marrying when he was 25, he remained monogamous until her death 25 years later. He never considered taking another wife, although all his friends, uncles, and peers were polygamous.
After Khadijah's death, when he was 50, he took at least 12 more wives. Only 2 were virgins: 'A'isha and Maryam (a Coptic Christian from Egypt).
Only his sixth and seventh wives (Umm Salamah and Zaynab, respectively) were his direct cousins whom he had known since their childhood. Umm Salamah was a widow with three children and a fourth born almost immediately after their marriage, and Zaynab came as a divorcee after a failed marriage to his adopted son Zayd.
Upon Becoming Muslim
Should a person, upon accepting Islam, divorce his or her non-Muslim spouse? Many famous early male Companions adopted Islam long after their wives. For example, 'Umar's wife Zaynab was the sister of 'Uthman bin Maz'un. Both of them were Muslims. Hamzah's wife was Salmah, and 'Abbas' wife was Lubabah (Umm Fadl), daughters of Hind bint Awf by different husbands. In 'Abbas' case, Umm Fadl claimed to be the second woman to revert to Islam, the same day as her close friend Khadijah. Officially, 'Abbas accepted Islam just before the fall of Makkah 20 years later!
The Prophet did not ask them to divorce their non-Muslim husbands. In fact, they gradually entered Islam by being convinced of its truth. Incidentally, not only wives brought their husbands into Islam: Fatimah brought her brother 'Umar, Umm Habibah brought her father Abu Sufyan, and the Prophet's daughter Zaynab brought Abu al-'As. There are many similar cases.
At the Treaty of Hudaybiyyah, Umm Kulthum, daughter of the Prophet's enemy 'Uqbah bin Abu Mu'ayt, sought asylum with the Muslims when she learned that a revelation had said that women seeking the Prophet did not, like male escapees, have to be returned to their families and men. Their marriages could simply be voided.
In Qur'an 60:7-12, verse 10 is cited on the issue of divorcing non-believing spouses:"If you ascertain that they are believers, do not send them back to the unbelievers. They are not lawful for the unbelievers, not are the (unbelievers) lawful (husbands) for them."
However, the rest of the section discusses this subject with great tact and gentleness, and rather alters the perspective. Verse 7 states:"It may well be that Allah will grant love between you and those whom you (now) hold as enemies, for Allah has power over all things, and is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Allah forbids you not, with regard to those who do not (actually) fight you for (your faith) nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them; for Allah loves those who are just. Allah only forbids you with regard to those who fight against you for (your) faith, and drive you out of your homes, and support (others) in driving you out, from turning to them (for friendship and love). It is such as turn to these (in these circumstances) who do wrong."
A revert is a revert, and following the teaching given to Khalid bin Walid (the legendary general who had slaughtered so many Muslims before his reversion), that on entering Islam one's entire past is obliterated. The slate is wiped clean. That day becomes Day One of the rest of your life. So there is no baggage of "the past" for a revert. This is not to say, of course, that reverts have not been affected and influenced by their past, or that they can simply forget it.
And so anxious parents worry about their children marrying such people. Many in the older age group have failed marriages and divorces behind them, with all their traumas, and widows or widowers marry with all of their memories. It is never simple to marry someone with a "past." But what's simple in life? Moreover, is that really worth cutting everything else out for? Take the challenge on the chin, but do it with your eyes open.
The Prophet said that if an honorable person, one with nothing ostensibly wrong about him, sought a girl in marriage, he should not be turned away hurtfully by her guardian. This should be taken alongside the rule that no one should be coerced into marriage. The girl's wishes are final. Parents should not reject a proposal without good reason - and being a revert with a past is not an acceptable one. Allah has already forgiven that past.
Most scholars agree that alcohol was prohibited in the same year as Hudaybiyyah (628 CE). First, Muslims were told they should not come to prayer while intoxicated (4:43). When 'Umar prayed for clearer guidance, the Prophet recieved verses 5:90-91, saying that alcohol was an abomination and Satan's handiwork.
Upon hearing that, all Muslims threw away their alcohol. But some asked: "Can alcohol really be an abomination, for some of the martyrs of Badr and Uhud consumed it?" In response came: "Those who believed and did good may not be blamed for what they consumed (in the past), inasmuch as they feared Allah, believed and did good works. Allah loves the viruous" (5:93). The analogy applies to revert suitors-they should not be blamed for "what they consumed in the past," premarital sex included.
Should a revert spouse divorce or leave the non-revert one? This issue requires great compassion. When the Prophet abandoned Makkah for Madinah, his daughter Zaynab could not bear to leave her non-Muslim husband Abu al-'As, and was not required to do so until years later under other circumstances. The Prophet did not automatically divorce them. This is an important Sunnah, since it involves his own children.
Such a spouse should be considered a potential revert, and the revert should do his or her absolute best to embody Islam's manners, effort, charity, and so on. Do not ram your theology down his or her throat, or as Prophet Jesus ('alayhi al-salaam)(is reported in the Bible- Ed.)to have said: "Don't cast your pearls before swine." The best way is to give the best example, especially of love and compassion. Then, if the non-Muslim becomes a Muslim, what a wonderful reward that will be! If it does not work out, and life with that spouse becomes increasingly difficult, then no doubt divorce would follow on the grounds that one spouse would probably consider the other's behavior unreasonable, leading to the marriage's breakdown. Certainly, give it every chance first-especially if children are involved.








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Dua' , - What to say after completing the prayer















"أَسْتَغْفِرُ اللهَ )ثَلَاثاً3 times( اللَّهُمَّ أَنْتَ السَّلَامُ وَمِنْكَ السَّلَامُ، تَبَارَكْتَ يَا ذَا الْجَلَالِ وَالْإِكْرَامِ".
66. 'Astaghfirullaaha Allaahumma 'Antas-Salaamu wa minkas-salaamu, tabaarakta yaaThal-Jalaali wal-'Ikraam.
I seek the forgiveness of Allah (three times) . O Allah, You are Peace and from You comes peace . Blessed are You , O Owner of majesty and honor.
Reference: Muslim 1/414.
"لَا إِلهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، لَهُ الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ، اللَّهُمَّ لَا مَانِعَ لِمَا أَعْطَيْتَ، وَلَا مُعْطِيَ لِمَا مَنَعْتَ، وَلَا يَنْفَعُ ذَا الْجَدِّ مِنْكَ الْجَدُّ".
67. Laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu wa Huwa 'alaa kulli shay'in Qadeer, Allaahumma laa maard'a limaa 'a'tayta, wa laa mu'tiya limaa mana'ta, wa laa yanfa'uthal-jaddi minkal-jadd.
None has the right to be worshipped but Allah alone, He has no partner, His is the dominion and His is the praise, and He is Able to do all things. O Allah, there is none who can withhold what You give, and none may give what You have withheld; and the might of the mighty person cannot benefit him against You.
Reference: Al-Bukhari 1/255, Muslim 1/414.
"لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، لَهُ الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ، لَا حَوْلَ وَلَا قُوَّةَ إِلَّا بِاللهِ، لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ، وَلَا نَعْبُدُ إِلَّا إِيَّاهُ، لَه النِّعْمَةُ وَلَهُ الْفَضْلُ وَلَهُ الثَّنَاءُ الْحَسَنُ، لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ مُخْلِصِينَ لَهُ الدِّينَ وَلَوْ كَرِهَ الْكَافِرُونَ".
68. Laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul-mulku, wa lahul-hamdu wa Huwa 'alaa kulli shay 'in Qadeer. Laa hawla wa laa quwwata 'illaa billaahi, laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu, wa laa na'budu 'illaa 'iyyaahu, lahun-ni'matu wa lahul-fadhlu wa lahuth-thanaa'ul-hasanu, laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu mukhliseena lahud-deena wa law karihal-kaafiroon.
None has the right to be worshipped but Allah alone, He has no partner, His is the dominion and His is the praise and He is Able to do all things. There is no power and no might except by Allah . None has the right to be worshipped but Allah, and we do not worship any other besides Him . His is grace , and His is bounty and to Him belongs the most excellent praise. None has the right to be worshipped but Allah . (We are) sincere in making our religious devotion to Him, even though the disbelievers may dislike it.
Reference: Muslim 1/415.
"سُبْحَانَ اللهِ، وَالْحَمْدُ للهِ، وَاللهُ أَكْبَرُ )ثَلَاثاً وَثَلَاثِينَ33 times( لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، لَهُ الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ".
69. Subhaanallaahi, walhamdu lillaahi wallaahu 'Akbar, - Laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamduwaHuwa'alaakullishay'inQadeer.
Glory is to Allah , and praise is to Allah , and Allah is the Most Great (each said thirty-three times). None has the right to be worshipped but Allah alone, He has no partner, His is the dominion and His is the praise and He is Able to do all things.
Reference: Muslim 1/418, Whoever says this after every prayer will be forgiven his sins even though they be as the foam of the sea.
بَسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ "قُلْ هُوَ اللهُ أَحَدٌ۞اللهُ الصَّمَدُ۞لَمْ يَلِدْ وَلَمْ يُولَدْ۞وَلَمْ يَكُنْ لَهُ كُفُوًا أَحَدٌ"
70. Bismillaahir-Rahmaanir-Raheem. Qul Huwallaahu 'Ahad. Allaahus-Samad. Lam yalid wa lam yoolad. Wa lam yakun lahu kufuwan 'ahad.
With the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Say: He is Allah (the) One. The Self-Sufficient Master, Whom all creatures need, He begets not nor was He begotten, and there is none equal to Him.
Reference: Al-Ikhlas 112:1-4.
بَسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ "قُلْ أَعُوذُ بِرَبِّ الْفَلَقِ۞مِنْ شَرِّ مَا خَلَقَ۞وَمِنْ شَرِّ غَاسِقٍ إِذَا وَقَبَ۞وَمِنْ شَرِّ النَّفَّاثَاتِ فِي الْعُقَدِ۞وَمِنْ شَرِّ حَاسِدٍ إِذَا حَسَدَ".
Bismillaahir-Rahmaanir-Raheem. Qul 'a'oothu birabbil-falaq. Min sharri maa khalaq. Wa min sharri ghaasiqin 'ithaa waqab. Wa min sharrin-naffaathaati fil-'uqad. Wa min sharri haasidin 'ithaa hasad.
With the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. Say: I seek refuge with (Allah) the Lord of the daybreak, from the evil of what He has created, and from the evil of the darkening (night) as it comes with its darkness, and from the evil of those who practice witchcraft when they blow in the knots, and from the evil of the envier when he envies.
Reference: Al-Falaq 113:1-5.
بَسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ "قُلْ أَعُوذُ بِرَبِّ النَّاسِ۞مَلِكِ النَّاسِ۞إِلَهِ النَّاسِ۞مِنْ شَرِّ الْوَسْوَاسِ الْخَنَّاسِ۞الَّذِي يُوَسْوِسُ فِي صُدُورِ النَّاسِ۞مِنَ الْجِنَّةِ وَالنَّاسِ".
Bismillaahir-Rahmaanir-Raheem . Qul 'a'oothu birabbin-naas . Malikin-naas . 'Ilaahin-naas . Min sharril-waswaasil-khannaas. Allathee yuwaswisu fee sudoorin-naas. Minal-jinnati wannaas.
With the Name of Allah , the Most Gracious , the Most Merciful. Say: I seek refuge with (Allah) the Lord of mankind, the King of mankind , the God of mankind , from the evil of the whisperer who withdraws, who whispers in the breasts of mankind, of jinns and men.1(These Surahs should be recited in Arabic after each prayer. After the Maghrib and Fajr prayers they should be recited three times each.)2
Reference:
1An-Nas 114:1-6
2Abu Dawud 2/86, An-Nasa'i 3/68. See also Al-Albani, SahihAt-Tirmithi 2/8.
"اللهُ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا هُوَ الْحَيُّ الْقَيُّومُ لَا تَأْخُذُهُ سِنَةٌ وَلَا نَوْمٌ لَهُ مَا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الْأَرْضِ مَنْ ذَا الَّذِي يَشْفَعُ عِنْدَهُ إِلَّا بِإِذْنِهِ يَعْلَمُ مَا بَيْنَ أَيْدِيهِمْ وَمَا خَلْفَهُمْ وَلَا يُحِيطُونَ بِشَيْءٍ مِنْ عِلْمِهِ إِلَّا بِمَا شَاءَ وَسِعَ كُرْسِيُّهُ السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضَ وَلَا يَئُودُهُ حِفْظُهُمَا وَهُوَ الْعَلِيُّ الْعَظِيمُ".
71. Allaahu laa 'ilaaha 'illaa Huwal-Hayyul-Qayyoom, laa ta'khuthuhu sinatun wa laa nawm, lahu maa fis-samaawaati wa maafil-'ardh, manthal-lathee yashfa'u 'indahu 'illaa bi'ithnih, ya'lamu maa bayna 'aydeehim wa maa khalfahum, wa laa yuheetoona bishay'im-min 'ilmihi 'illaa bimaa shaa'a, wasi'a kursiyyuhus-samaawaati wal'ardh, wa laa ya'ooduhu hifdhuhumaa, wa Huwal-'Aliyyul- 'Adheem.
Allah! There is none worthy of worship but He, the Ever Living, the One Who sustains and protects all that exists. Neither slumber nor sleep overtakes Him. To Him belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on the earth. Who is he that can intercede with Him except with His Permission? He knows what happens to them in this world, and what will happen to them in the Hereafter. And they will never compass anything of His Knowledge except that which He wills. His Throne extends over the heavens and the earth, and He feels no fatigue in guarding and preserving them. And He is the Most High, the Most Great. (Recite in Arabic after each prayer.)
Reference: An-Nasa'i, 'Amalul-Yawm wal-Laylah (Hadith no. 100), also Ibn As-Sunni (no. 121). See also Al-Albani, Sahihul-Jami' As-Saghir 5/339 and Silsilatul-Ahadith As-Sahihah 2/697 (no. 972).
"لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَحَدْهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ، لَهُ الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ يُحْيِي وَيُمِيتُ، وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ".
72. Laa 'ilaaha 'illallaahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu yuhyee wa yumeetu wa Huwa 'alaa kulli shay'in Qadeer.
None has the right to be worshipped but Allah alone, Who has no partner. His is the dominion and His is the praise . He brings life and He causes death , and He is Able to do all things. (Recite ten times in Arabic after the Maghrib and Fajr prayers.)
Reference: At-Tirmithi 5/515, Ahmad 4/227. See its checking in Ibn Al-Qayyim Al-Jawziyyah's Zddul-Ma'ad 1/300.
"اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْأَلُكَ عِلْماً نَافِعاً، وَرِزْقاً طَيِّباً، وَعَمَلاً مُتَقَبَّلاً".
73. Allaahumma 'innee 'as'aluka 'ilman naafi'an, wa rizqan tayyiban, wa 'amalan mutaqabbalan.
O Allah, I ask You for knowledge that is of benefit , a good provision , and deeds that will be accepted. (Recite in Arabic after the Fajr prayer.)
Reference: Ibn Majah and others. See Al-Albani, Sahih Ibn Majah 1/152 and Majma'uz-Zawd'id 10/111.





















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Dua' , - Whoever says ten times immediately after finishing the Fajr/Maghrib Prayer ..

















On the authority of Abu Dharr (radiAllahu anhu), that the Prophet (sallAllahu alayhi wasallam) said -
“Whoever says ten times immediately after finishing the Fajr (Dawn) Payer,before moving from his place or talking to anyone,
“laa ilaaha illallaahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul mulku wa lahul hamdu yuhyee wa yumeetu wa huwa alaa kulli shay’in qadeer – [ none has the right to be worshipped except Allaah alone having no partner, sovereignty is His and all praise is for Him and He brings life and He causes death and He has full power over everything,]”
ten good deeds will be recorded for him, ten sins will be eliminated from him, he will be upgraded ten degrees (in reward), he will be safeguarded from all kinds of harm all that day, he will be guarded against shaytan and no sin can overtake him on that day (and nullify his good deeds) except associating others in worship with Allaah. (At Tirmidhi no.3484 [5/515])
At-Tirmidhi commented on this hadeeth saying, “This is a hasan, saheeh hadeeth (i.e a good and authentic hadeeth)”.
Likewise it is an act of Sunnah to say dhikr ten times straight after Magrib salah too, according to a hadith related by Imaam Ahmad Hanbal (rahimahullah) on the authority of Umm Salamah (radiAllahu anha), hadith number 26430. Also stated in Sahih Ibn Hibban no. 2023.
Source: A Summary of Islamic Jurisprudence – Dr. Salih al-Fawzaan, Volume 1 , Chapter 10



















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The fact that Islamic moral values do not yet rule the world must stir all Muslims
I welcome, My Blog Readers Openions. So write your comments and Suggetions any time, below each Posts or Write to my Email - dgptnayd@yahoo.com/-