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Friday, November 8, 2013

Sex in Islam, - Masturbation:

The pressing need to relieve himself of sexual tension may drive a
young man to masturbation.
The majority of scholars consider it haram. Imam Malik bases his
judgement on the verse,Those who guard their sexual organs except with
their spouses or those whom their right hands possess, for (with
regard to them) they are without blame. But those who crave something
beyond that are transgressors, (23:5-7) arguing that the masturbator
is one of those who "crave something beyond that."
On the other hand, it is reported that Imam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal regarded
semen as an excretion of the body like other excrete and permitted its
expulsion as blood letting is permitted. Ibn Hazm holds the same view.
However, the Hanbali jurists permit masturbation only under two
conditions: first, the fear of committing fornication or adultery, and
second, not having the means to marry.
Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi comments inThe Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam:
We are inclined to accept the opinion of Imam Ahmad in a situation in
which there is sexual excitation and danger of committing the haram.
For example, a young man has gone abroad to study or work, thereby
encountering many temptations which he fears he will be unable to
resist, may resort to this method of relieving sexual tension provided
he does not do it excessively or make it into a habit.
Yet better than this is the Prophet's advice to the Muslim youth who
is unable to marry, namely, that he seek help through frequent
fasting, for fasting nurtures will-power, teaches control of desires,
and strengthens the fear of Allah. The Prophet, peace and blessings be
upon him, is reported to have said,"O youth, whoever of you is able to
marry, let him marry, for it spares one looking at what one should
not, or lapsing in adultery. And if he cannot marry, let him observe
fasting, for it is a shield against evil."(Reported by Muslim).
You should make use of the following:
1.Observe fasting, because it bolsters one's faith, preserves
chastity, and protects one from evil thoughts.
2.Observe moderation in eating and drinking in order to avoid
stimulating your desire.
3.Keep away from anything that is sexually stimulating, such as
pornographic pictures, erotic films and love songs.
4.Choose good and righteous friends.
5.Keep yourself busy in worship and spiritual acts.
6.Interact with activities of the society in such away that it keeps
you away from thinking about sex.
7.Avoid gatherings and places that bring men and women physically
close to each other.
8.Avoid sleeping on beds that are so soft that they make one think about sex.
9.Try to admire natural things such as flowers and beautiful scenery,
which do not stimulate one sexually, instead of admiring girls and
women.
10.If you find the previous things useful, then it is forbidden for
you to masturbate. However, if you find that you cannot relieve
yourself except through masturbation, and you fear you may lapse in
adultry if you do not masturbate, then the juristic rule which states
that "the lesser evil is to be suffered in order to fend off the major
one" applies to you, as masturbation is deemed to be the lesser of two
evils in this case.But, we would like to stress that this may be done
only in the case of dire necessity, when all soultions prove to be of
no avail.
May Allah guide you to the right path and help you keep away from sins.
Allah Almighty knows best.

Dua Against Debt

Being in debt is a killer. It consumes us with stress, and eats away
at our happiness and sense of security. It destroys marriages, and if
the debt is between family or friends then it can ruin those
relationships. In some countries, inability to pay your debt can even
you put in prison.
I feel obligated to mention that part of the reason so many people are
carrying so much debt is our addiction to the material lifestyle. We
are bombarded with messages and advertisements telling us we need to
buy this and own that. It gets to the point where we measure our
status in life (and that of others) by what we own, or worse, by how
much we spend. If we spend a huge sum of money on a lavish wedding,
then we are "honored" in society. If not, we feel shamed. Since our
incomes do not match our desires, we go into debt.
This thinking and lifestyle is completely contrary to what Islam
teaches us, and to the example set by the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and
the Sahabah (may Allah be pleased with them all). Even when they
became rulers of the world, they continued to live simple and humble
lifestyles, because they understood what really matters in life.
So the first step for us is to readjust our priorities, and to realize
that what matters is our relationship with Allah. Beyond that, the
important things in life are our family relationships – loving our
spouses and children and spending time with them, worshiping with
them, supporting them. Then our friendships, and doing some good in
the world, creating something meaningful, and being an agent of
compassion in the lives of those around you.
Dua Against Debt
If you have done whatever you can to avoid debt, and still you find
yourself burdened with debts, try this dua from Fortress of the
Muslim. Repeat it many times every day:
Dua for relief from debt, in Arabic
Allaahummak-finee bihalaalika 'an haraamika wa 'aghninee bifadhlika
'amman siwaaka.
"O Allah, suffice me with what You have allowed instead of what You
have forbidden , and make me independent of all others besides You."
(Reference: At-Tirmithi 5/560. See also Al-Albani, Sahih At-Tirmithi 3/180.)
This dua against debt is really brilliant, because the dua contains
within itself the solution to the problem. "Suffice me with what you
have allowed." In other words, let the halal be enough for me. Don't
let me get myself into debt because of haram mortgage loans or
excessive material desire, or out-of-control consumer spending. Let me
be satisfied with a simple, halal life, so that I don't get into debt.
If you repeat this often enough it becomes a part of your thinking and
awareness, and you modify your own behavior, which leads to: "make me
independent of all others besides You." You become your own man or
woman, not owing money to anyone, independent, relying only on Allah.
I'm not saying the dua is just an affirmation, I'm saying it works on
both levels, as an affirmation and as a prayer to Allah to help you
achieve that affirmation. It's a subtle and amazing dua.
Three Excellent Dua's Against Debt:
(note that #2 is the same as the one above)
1) "Oh Allah, I take refuge in You…"
Narrated by Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri (ra):
One day the Messenger of Allah (saw) entered the mosque. He saw there
a man from the Ansar (a resident of Madinah) called Abu Umamah and
said to him: "What is the matter that I am seeing you sitting in the
mosque when there is no time of prayer?" Abu Umamah said: "I am
entangled in sorrow and debts." The Prophet Muhammad (ra ) replied:
"Shall I not teach you words by which, when you say them, Allah will
remove your sorrow, and settle your debts?" Abu Umamah said: "Yes,
Messenger of Allah." The Prophet Muhammad (ra ) said: "Say in the
morning and evening:Allahumma inni 'auzu bika min alhamma wal 'huzn,
wal 'ajzi wal kasali wal bukhli wal jubn, wa dhala'iddini wa
'galabatir rajaal."(See here for the arabic text).
'O Allah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and
laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from
being overpowered by men.'
Abu Umamah said: "When I did that Allah removed my distress and
settled my debt." [Abu Dawood]
2) "O Allah, grant me enough…"
Ali radi Allahu `anhu said that a slave, who had made a contract with
his master to pay for his freedom, came to him and said, "I am unable
to fulfil my contract, so help me." He said, "Shall I not teach you
some words which Allah's Messenger (ra) taught me, and which even if
you had a debt as large as a mountain Allah would pay it for you?":
Allahumma akfini bihala lika an haramika wa aghnini bi fadhlika am-man siwak.
"O Allah, grant me enough of what You make lawful that I may dispense
of with what You make unlawful, and make me independent, by Your
bounty, of other than You."[At-Tirmidhi]
3) "O Allah, Sovereign of all…"
The Prophet (saw) said to Muadh radi Allahu `anhu, "Should I not teach
you a supplication which, when used to implore Allah, Allah shall pay
your debt, even it be as huge as Mount Uhud? He then mentioned:
Allahumma Maalik al-mulki tu'til-mulka man tasha' u wa tanzi'ul mulka
mimman tasha', wa tu'izzu man tasha' u wa tudhilu man tasha', bi
yadika al-khayr, innaka 'ala kulli shay'in qadeer, Rahmaan-id-dunya
wa'l-aakhirah wa raheemahuma, tu'teeyahuma man tasha' wa tamna'
minhuma man tasha', irhamni rahmatan taghnini biha 'an rahmati man
siwaak.
"O Allah, Sovereign of all, You give dominion to whomsoever You will
and You take dominion away from whomsoever You will, You exalt
whomsoever You will and You bring low whomsoever You will. In Your
hand is all goodness and You are able to do all things. Most Merciful
and Most compassionate in this world and in the Hereafter, You give
them to whomsoever You will and withhold them from whomsoever You
will. Bestow mercy upon Me in such a manner that I have no need of the
mercy of anyone but You."[Tabarani]

10 Islamic quotations by Sarah Saghir

Thoughts on Prayer, Faith, Gratitude and the Soul
By Sarah Saghir
1. Make wudu, not war.
2. You can't love God, without Him letting you. He must have loved you first.
3. It's the dua at the Iftar table that tells us what we really want.
It's the ability to suppress the nafs and hush the stomach for a few
extra minutes, all to let the heart speak what it wishes.
***
4. The only mirror we should obsessively check is that which reflects
the soul. You cannot purchase such a mirror, but you can find it
within you. *Ponder* over the condition of your soul. Sit with
yourself and reflect. But for such reflections to surface, you need
blessed light from God and a pair of open eyes – nay, an open heart.
Because sometimes, "It is not the eyes that are blind, but the
hearts." (Qur'an 22:46)
Ya Allah put the light of the Quran in our hearts. Make it a means for
us to clearly see. Ya Wahhab
***
5. There is absolutely no need, my friend – no need for you to wipe
the rain off my face after the prayer. I know your intentions are
well, as it may seem like there are dark clouds hovering over my head,
but I am harboring rainbows on the inside, with colors of love, fear,
hope, guilt, peace, shame and calmness. And sometimes these tears mean
i'm desperately looking for the rays of sincerity that bring this
prism to life, under the rain.
***
6. I know you cannot measure the magnitude of your blessings; but
please tell me you noticed one thing: the difference between the
guided and the heedless. You — whom God addresses, while causally
sitting on a bus, reading His speech, surrounded by passengers full of
hunger & vacancy — must be so lucky. Tell me you recognize this debt;
tell me you found in its depth, gratitude.
***
7. When you finally decide to practice your faith, know that God is
100% behind you. He's the one to give you that initial push. And at
first, it will be easy breezy; you will feel 'the rush' and experience
that 'spiritual high.'
But then He will test you (only because He loves you) And now you've
got to start swinging yourself, using your core, feet, arms, your will
– against the wind, gravity, the hardships, people, your sins..
You need to keep pushing to the rhythm of faith that swings high, low,
beautiful. Keep pushing to get higher, closer to Him. Keep pushing.
***
8. O Allah whoever wishes khair (good) for me in the secrecy of the
night or in the openness of daylight, grant them double what they've
wished for me. And whoever wishes sharr (harm) to touch me, pardon
them and stretch distance and forgiveness between us. Ya Karim,
9. I want to live a life of simplicity, not an easy life.
10. If you only pray when you're in trouble, you're in trouble.

Seeing Through Eyes of Hope

We all feel weary at times. We feel like we're fighting on so many
fronts and that we have no helpers. At times our passion drains away
and we feel like we're just going through the motions. This happens to
me. I think it happens to everyone.
At those moments, Shaytan (Satan) tries to push us into despair.
Despair is one of Shaytan's greatest weapons. If we are in debt,
Shaytan tries to get us to despair of getting out of debt. If we're
ill, he tries to convince us to despair of getting well. If we have
committed sins, he whispers to us to despair of Allah's mercy and the
possibility of forgiveness. He tries to make us despair of our
futures, despair of our salvation, and fail to see the beauty in our
lives.
Believers must resist Shaytan's whispers. Believers must be people of
hope, and must see the world through eyes of hope. Believers make life
choices that are rooted in hope.
"Shaytan threatens you with poverty and orders you to immorality,
while Allah promises you forgiveness from Him and bounty. And Allah is
all-Encompassing and Knowing."– Quran, Al-Baqarah, 2:268
So we have two different calls echoing in our ears. Shaytan calls us
to fear, and grasping attachment to this material world.
Allah the Almighty, on the other hand, offers us forgiveness and true
blessings. Allah offers us hope. Hope is not wishing on a star, or
daydreaming. Hope is a real thing, because it's a part of trusting
Allah. After all, prayer is all about hope.
The Quran tells us that with every difficulty comes ease. Hope is an
acknowledgment of that reality, that things will get better, and a
time of ease will come.
When life becomes hard, we need to see through eyes of hope, not eyes
of despair.
Salma
Eyes of Hope
The morning spills out
yellow like a poppy field.
My street is emerald with life:
olives and spring fire,
Chinese fringe and apricot.
My six year old daughter
kneels to pet a cat
but it runs, bell jingling.
"That cat is complicated," she says.
Later she grasps my hand
and says, "Baba,
you are number one."
There's a smell of rain in the air.
When Salma was near
to being born, the doctor said
that the umbilical cord
was looped around her neck.
She could suffocate, he said.
For a week of nights my thoughts raced
as I lay in bed, listening to the frogs
in the field behind the house.
I prayed much harder
than I've ever prayed for myself.
As we walk, Salma collects
acorns and red berries,
fallen leaves and dandelions.
"I'm making a nature salad,"
she says. "I'll hand you the things,
and you put them in the bucket.
That's the process."
I want to laugh, but I only smile,
and I follow Salma down the street
humbly, and with eyes of hope.