It’s all in a hug

Kids aren't mind readers, but they are capable of reading our body language
When we hear about the tragedies in the world, such as the horrific
tsunami; or about all of the people and children hurt inthe worn-torn
countries found allaround the world; the millions of children who are
starving to death or dying of AIDS ...we each should be much, much
more thankful to our Creator for all that we have been blessed with
and never, ever forget all those who are suffering in our du'aa
(supplications).
Making du'aa and remembering all those suffering should be a regular
occurrence in our households, and with our families. Our children in
the West,with all the available perks in life are completely oblivious
to the suffering in the world unless we talk to them about it and
remind them that for all that they have there are so many that have
nothing. By the same token, we need to give ourselves a harsh reminder
as well not to take things - specifically our families for granted, as
we so often do.
Our children really need us to be there for them, not just to give
them lunch – money or pay their allowances.... but to be their rockin
the shakable and unsteady world they live in. Most importantly, we
need to show them by words and actions, that we love them – at every
opportunity we get.
A single action can say, and mean, a lot
We all have clear and concise memories of our parents – clear into our
adulthood. We remember what they did, what they said, how they acted,
even how they said things... and we also vividly recall what they
didn'tdo or say. Sometimes just a single action in a particular moment
can say, and mean a lot to a child, including and especially a
teenager. Teenagers and tweens care a lot more about what we, their
parent, think, than they would like to let on. So, while they may act
like they could care less, there shouldbe no doubt whatsoever that
they care immensely.
Some kids, if they do not get adequate positive attention, act out
with undesirable behavior to get any attention in any way possible
even if it is negative attention from Mom or Dad. Something is always
better than nothing, or not enough. Make thetime, you may not have it
later aswe live our lives and get caught up in our own dramas, we
often forget that our lives here are onlytemporary.
At any given time, Allaah Almighty forbid it for us, there could be a
car accident, a burglary gone bad, an indiscriminate drive-by shooting
or let's face it a hate crime committed against any person in our
family. People pass away from house-hold accidents every day and then
there is illness, which could strike any one of us. These
circumstances are all beyond our control and are real.
Because we live with such uncertainty and because we mustrealize and
make our children also understand that they are notinvisible... we
must make the time to spend with our family and show them we love
them; not tomorrow, but today - right now, this moment, because we may
not have that time later.
We all have the habit of putting things off, publicly and privately.
It is easier, life is busy, and there never is enough time in a day.
However, we should take notice to never procrastinate with our love.
We cannot afford to take time for granted when it comes to our
religion or our family. Time spent on these two vital aspects of our
lives is valuable time that is been very well spent.
Start with a hug
I know some of you may not havebeen raised in a home that displayed
affection and the thought of it, the action itself, may be awkward and
a little strange. But even if you didn't receive it as a child, know
that your children need it from you. Hugging is a whole lot easier
than you think, and once you get in the habit of doing it several
times per day, it will become natural and a comfort to you and your
children.
Comfort in a cuddle!
I make du'aa that, if haven't already, you begin today by giving your
kids a hug each day and tell them you love and care for them. It is
such a comfort for a child, or wife or close friend for that matter,
to be held close and enclosed in loving arms.
For anyone who may be skeptical about it, you should ask yourself why
it seems scary to you. The Prophet Muhammad was known to be very
affectionate and caring towards his children and he is our best
example and role model as is featured in the following Hadeeth: Abu
Salamah related that Abu Hurayrah said: "The Prophet of Allaah kissed
Hasan ibn 'Ali while Aqra` ibn Haabis was sitting nearby. Aqra` said,
`I have ten children and have never kissed one of them.' The Prophet
looked at him and said, `Those who show no mercy will be shown no
mercy"' [Al-Bukhaariand Muslim]
After you have mulled that over for a while, then ask yourself: what
do you really have to lose? - - ▓███▓ Translator:->
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Draw Closer to Your Lord - I

When a person contemplates the state of people who are trapped in
forbidden lusts and those who pursue the satisfaction of their
instincts and desires, you will find that they share a common factor,
which is evident in their every movement and moment of repose, and
which is reflected in their facial features: a weak connection with
Allaah The Almighty.
How can a heart which is connected to Allaah The Almighty, a heart
that knows Himand has tasted the pleasure of being close to Him, find
pleasure or comfort in looking at nude pictures, watching pornographic
movies or stealing surreptitious gazes at what is unlawful? Thus,
everyone who has fallen into one of the sins related to sexual
desires, or returned to it after repentance and abandoning it, has
been dragged to this state due to the weakness of his faith. Weak
faith facilitates the way to his soul which is a persistent enjoiner
of evil, as well as to the accursed Satan, and thus he was trapped in
the swamps of sexual desire after being firm for a long time in the
gardens of faith.
Faith in Allaah The Almighty is theshield against falling into
prohibitions, second only, of course, to the guidance of Allaah The
Almighty. The Prophet said: "The adulterer is not a believer at the
time he commits adultery." [Al-Bukhaari]
Thus, when faith inhabits the heart, dominates the feelings, and flows
to the organs to lead them to the pleasure of Allaah The Almighty, the
person will notdare to think of committing an act of disobedience. The
eye will not dare to look at what is prohibited, nor will any part of
the body dare to disobey the commands of Allaah The Almighty. Building
faith in the heart is not easy; however, the one who insists on
knocking on the door will be let in eventually.
This is a modest attempt to help you on your way to strong faith,
which destroys the desire that may have humiliated you and caused you
to suffer one calamityafter another. It involves the following steps:
Strengthening one's fear of Allaah The Almighty
Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {But as for he who fearedthe
position of his Lord and prevented the soul from [unlawful]
inclination, Then indeed, Paradise will be [his] refuge.} [Quran
79:40-41] Fear of Allaah The Almighty is the real deterrent that
prevents you from falling into the clutches of desire,not just the
fear of scandal or thefear of diseases. In Madaarij As-Saalikeen,
Imaam Ibn Al-Qayyim said, "When fear of Allaah dwells in the hearts,
it burns the places of desires in them." Below is a practical program
that helps to strengthen the fear of Allaah The Almighty in your
heart:
1. Remembering death often:
The more we remember death, the softer our hearts will be and the
greater will be their fear of meeting Allaah The Almighty. As we are
always committing sins and misdeeds, to remember death constantly, you
have to do the following:
- Visit the graves: Make a weekly plan or a plan every two weeks
tovisit the graves since visiting the graves reminds one of the
Hereafter. The Prophet said: "Ihad forbidden you to visit the graves;
now, you can visit them, for it softens the heart, makes eyes shed
tears, and reminds of the Hereafter." [Al-Albaani: Saheeh]
- Washing the dead and accompanying funerals: The sightof a dead body
being turned in the hands of the washer greatly softens the heart and
implants fear of Allaah The Almighty.
- Writing one's will and always looking at it: The Messenger of Allaah
said: "It is not permissible for any Muslim who has something to will
to stay for two nights without executing a written will with him."
[Al-Bukhaari] Writing a will and looking into it from time to time
keeps you mindful of death.
- Remembering the agonies of death and watching the dying people.
2. Writing down and counting your sins:
The Muslim remembers the sins that he has committed with his body. He
remembers the sins of the tongue, like backbiting and tale-bearing,
the sins of the eye like looking at what is prohibited,the sins of the
private parts like masturbation, etc., and the sins of the heart like
arrogance, pride,envy, and others. Thus, the Muslim should remember
his failure to carry out his religious duties and the rights of others
upon him, which include being dutiful to parents, maintaining kinship
ties and others. He shouldbring to mind his negligence in acts of
worship, such as lack of humbleness and concentration inworship,
abandoning voluntary acts of worship, and failing to attend
congregational and Friday prayers.
After you have written down these sins, also write down the blessings
of Allaah The Almighty that He has bestowed upon you. Then, make a
comparison between the blessings that Allaah The Almighty granted you
and the sins that you defy Him with night and day. This is sure to
fill your heart with fear of Allaah The Almighty, that He might punish
you for your sins.
Performing acts of worship regularly and perfectly
Faith requires words, deeds, and belief in the heart, and acts of
worship serve as the fuel of faith,which cause it to increase or
decrease. This is because faith increases by obedience and decreases
by disobedience.
This is a recommended schedule for acts of worship:
- Do not miss congregational prayers in the Masjid, especially the
Fajr prayer. This is a sure test of whether you can get rid of
thisproblem from your life. The moreyou perform the Fajr prayer at its
due time, the clearer it becomes that this problem is not deeply
rooted in you.
- Observe voluntary prayers after the obligatory ones. These voluntary
prayers are twelve Rak'ahs (units of prayer) every day and night,
guaranteeing the one who performs them a house in Paradise. They are
four Rak'ahsbefore the Dhuhr prayer and two after it, two after the
Maghrib prayer, two after the 'Ishaa' prayer, and two before the Fajr
prayer.
- You should perform the Witr prayer and voluntary prayers at night,
even if they are two short Rak'ahs.
- In all these prayers, always try to evoke the heart in prayer and
encourage your body to be humble as much as possible. Thisis because
prayers forbid immorality and bad conduct, and listening to a lecture
on humbleness and concentration inprayer may help with that.
- Give greater care to performing ablution and try to contemplate on
its inner dimensions. With every drop of water coming down from your
body, Allaah The Almighty forgives the sins committed by that part of
the body. Think, while performing ablution and with the water dripping
from your face, how Allaah The Almighty is forgiving your gazing at
and listening to things that are prohibited, and how He is forgiving
your watching pornographic movies or sites. When the water drips from
the fingers of your hands, Allaah The Almighty forgives you for all
the prohibited actions you did with them, whether they were
masturbation, browsing pornographic sites, or other sins that involve
your hands. When the water drips from your feet, Allaah The Almighty
forgives every place to which your legs moved to, for example to a
date with a girl, or to obtain a new lewd movie from an evil friend.
- Live in this state when you perform ablution and be completely
certain and expect everything good from Allaah The Almighty. If you
believe that He will forgive you, He, the Exalted, will certainly do
so. Allaah The Almighty Says in a Qudsi Hadeeth (sacred narration): "I
meet as much expectations of My Slave as he expects of Me (i.e. I am
Able todo for him what he expects I can do for him), and I am with him
when he remembers Me. If he remembers Me within himself, I will
remember him within Myself,and if he remembers Me in an assembly, I
will remember him ina better assembly. If he draws one span nearer to
Me, I will draw one Thiraa' (64 cm) nearer to him; and if he draws one
Thiraa' nearer to Me, I will draw the distance of two outstretched
arms nearer to him; and if he comes to Me walking, I will go to him
running." [Al-Bukhaari and Muslim (this is the narration of
Al-Bukhaari)] - - ▓███▓ Translator:->
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Draw Closer to Your Lord - II

- Keep reciting the morning and evening Athkaar (words of remembrance)
and remember Allaah The Almighty often in general. This is because if
the tongue is busy with the remembrance of Allaah The Almighty, it
will keep the mind and heart busy with it; thus, the Muslim will not
find time to thinkof something other than Allaah The Almighty.
- You should read a portion from the Quran every day with reflection
and humbleness, even if it is a single page.
- Start memorizing the Quran gradually; it is the best thing to help
you overcome this problem. This step is also one of the most important
signs of success of the cure, like performing the Fajr prayer. If you
find yourself memorizing the Book of Allaah The Almighty easily,
without difficulty, this is also an indication that desire does not
control your heart. This has happened to a large number of young
people.
- Supplicate Allaah The Almighty at all times. Allaah The Almighty
becomes angry with the Muslim who does not supplicate Him. Saythe
following blessed supplication that the Prophet used to say as much as
you can. He would say : "Allaahumma inni as'aluk Al-huda wat-tuqa
wal-'afaafa wal-ghina (O Allaah, I ask You for guidance, piety,
chastity, and self-sufficiency.)" [Muslim]
- You must give charity, particularly giving charity in secret as it
extinguishes the anger of Allaah The Almighty. Give charity every day;
it does not necessarily have to be a large sum, but give it according
to yourcapacity. Perhaps one Dirham of such charity may outweigh one
thousand Dirhams.
- Fasting every Monday and Thursday. The Prophet said:"O youth,
whoever among you who can afford the expenses of marriage let him
marry, and whoever does not afford it let him fast, for it is a shield
for him." [Al-Bukhaari] However, let your fasting be 'real' in order
to achieve the effect mentioned by the Prophet in the Hadeeth that
fasting would be a shield and a means of protection and prevention for
you.
True fasting is not only abstaining from food and drink, but also
abstaining from lust, sins, and misdeeds throughout the fasting
period. Do not say, "I am fasting", when you do not feel something is
changing in you. The problem here is not in the fasting itself; the
problem is with you. The same thing happened with the Prophet when a
man came to him and said, "My brother has a stomach ache." The Prophet
said to him: "Let him drink honey." The man came for the second time
and said, "The honey increased his stomach pain." The Prophet said the
same thing to him. This happened three times and the fourth time, the
Prophet said: "Let him drink honey." The man replied, "The honey
increased his stomach pain." The Prophet then said: "Allaah hassaid
the truth, but your brother's stomach has told a lie." So, he made him
drink honey and he was cured. [Muslim]
Attachment to the Hereafter:
Free yourself from the capture and constraints of this life and rush
to Paradise that is as wide as the heavens and the earth which
contains all that the souls desire and delights the eyes, and in which
you will abide eternally. Indeed, it is folly to sell gold for dust,
and to sell the beautiful Hoors (celestial maidens), who have not been
touched by humans or Jinns, for a woman, no matter how beautiful she
is inthis worldly life. Now come with me and enjoy listening to the
Hoors, of whom the Prophet said: "The wives of people of Paradise sing
to their husbands in the best voice one has ever heard. Their songs
include: 'We are good and beautiful, the spouses of noble people; and
look with comfortable eyes.' Theyalso sing, saying, 'We are immortal
and never die; we are secured and never fear; we are those who abide
with their husbands and never leave them.'" [At-Tabaraani (Al-Albaani:
Saheeh)]
Dear brother and sister, listen to the description of Al-Hoor by Imaam
Ibn Al-Qayyim where he says, "When she appears the beauty of her face
shines like the sun, and light shines from between her teeth if she
smiles. When she meets her beloved husband, then say whatever you will
regarding the meeting of two lights! When she talks to him, what do
you think the conversation of two lovers wouldbe? When he embraces
her, whatdo you think the embracing of two branches would be like? If
she were to be revealed upon theworldly life, she would fill what
isbetween the heavens and the Earth with a beautiful scent, and the
creatures would not help glorifying, praising and exclaiming the
greatness of the Creator, and everything between the East and the West
would be adorned for her, and every eye would be shut from everything
but her, and the light of the sun would be outshone, just as the light
of the sun outshines the light of the stars, and everyone on the face
of the earth would believe in the Ever-Living, the One Who sustains
and protects all that exists.
"The cover on her head is better than the world and all that is in it,
and her contact with him is more pleasant than her best wishes. She
does not increase with age except in beauty and with living except in
love and union. She is free from pregnancy, childbirth and menses, and
pure of mucous, saliva, urine, stool and other filthy things. Her
youth never fades and her clothing is never worn out. The garment of
her beauty is not ragged, nor does the sweetness of her companionship
become boring. Her affection is restricted to her husband, so she
desires none buthim, just as his affection is restricted to her so she
is the sole object of his desire and wish.She pleases him when he
looks ather; she obeys him when he orders her; she guards his honor
when he is away from her. He is with her in utmost safety and
security, as none has touched herbefore of either humans or Jinn.
Whenever he looks at her, she fills his heart with happiness; whenever
she talks to him, she fills his ears with eloquent and well-versed
words as beautiful asa chain of pearls; when she appears, she fills
the palace and room with light; when she sings, she is a delight to
the sight and hearing; when she amuses and entertains, how great the
amusement and entertainment are; and when she kisses, nothing is more
desirous to him than this kissing."
After all of this, you allow a soul which is a persistent enjoiner of
evil or a weak devil to make you attached to a passing desire and
transient pleasure and to give up all this beauty! Respected brother,
be sure that the more your faith increases in your heart,the weaker
the power of sexual desire will be over you. Therefore,have
determination and perseverance, for, by Allaah, therecertainly is no
better endeavor you do than the endeavor to draw close to Allaah The
Almighty and attain His pleasure. - - ▓███▓ Translator:->
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Dought & Clear, - How can the daughtersof the deceased be giventheir shares of the inheritance fifteen yearsafter the death of their father?.

If the daughters share is not paid and has been delayed for 15 yrs
since the demise of the father.Do we have to calculate the share based
upon the value at the time of demise of the father or ithas to be
calculated based upon the present value?
Praise be to Allah.
Firstly:
It is obligatory to give each person who is entitled his share of the
inheritance in accordance with the laws of Allah regarding division of
the estate. Ownership of the estate passes to the heirs as soon as the
deceased dies. It says in al-Mawsoo'ah al-Fiqhiyyah (24/76):
Thefuqaha' are unanimouslyagreed that the estate passes to the heirs,
if there are no debts connected to it, from themoment the deceased
dies. End quote.
Ibn 'Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
The wealth passes to the heirs after the death of the deceased.
End quote from Fataawa Noor 'ala ad-Darb, 12/360
Secondly:
If the daughters of the deceased were prevented from obtaining their
rightful share of the inheritance throughout this time, if the estate
includes cash, they should take their share of the money as the
deceased left it, unless the one who kept the money used it to do
business with it or invested it, in which casethey are entitled to
take their share of the profits on that money, commensurate with their
shares of the inheritance.
If the estate was property or land, then they should take their share
of that, according to the shares allocated insharee'ah. If it is not
possible to divide it among all the heirs, and they need to sell it,
or some of the heirs need to sell any of their shares, then they may
take their share on the basis of the current price, even if it is
greaterthan its price on the day it was usurped, or if it grew or
developed, as inthe case of livestock, crops and the like, regardless
of whether that growth is connected to the original property or not.
Shaykh Zakariyya al-Ansaari (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
The transgressor is responsible for the original property and whatever
results from it of additional entities, such as offspring and crops,
because he seized the original property unlawfully.
End quote from Asna al-Mataalib, 2/340
If any part of it has been damaged or destroyed, such as if there has
beenany depreciation in its value since the time when it was usurped,
then the usurper must give those who have a rightful share what they
are entitled to, along with compensation for the depreciation in its
value.
Al-Husni (may Allah have mercy on him) said: It should be noted that
justas it is obligatory to return the usurped property, it is also
obligatory to give compensation for any depreciation in value; it
makes no difference whether it was partially damaged or completely
destroyed.
An example of depreciation in value is if the usurper confiscated a
plump animal, which then became lean, then grew fat again. He has to
return it along with compensation for the first loss of fatness,
because the second timeit grew fat is something else altogether. And
analogies may be drawnfrom this.
An example of complete destruction or loss is if the usurper
confiscated a pair of slippers worth ten dirhams, then lost one of
them, and the value of the remaining slipper is two dirhams. In this
case he is liable for the value of the lost slipper, which is five
dirhams, as well as compensation for the depreciation in value of the
remaining slipper, which is three dirhams, so he is liable for eight
dirhams, because the depreciation in value of one of them resulted
from the loss of the other.
End quote from Kifaayat al-Akhyaar, 1/283. See also Asna al-Mataalib,
2/344; Mataalib Ooli an-Nuha, 4/10ff.
Under the same heading of loss of value due to damage or complete
destruction we may include a drop in the price or value of the item
because of a drop in its marketability compared to the day on which it
was seized; the usurper is also liable for that according to the
correct opinion.
Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
This usurper kept the item away from its rightful owner until its
price dropped, so he is a wrongdoer. The drop in price is in fact a
kind of damage, because the price reflects the value of the item.
Hence the correct view is that if theprice drops, then the usurper is
liable for the depreciation in value. Sowe say that he must return the
item to its rightful owner, along with compensation for the
depreciation in its value.
End quote from ash-Sharh al-Mumti', 10/163. See also Kifaayatal-Akhyaar, 1/283
What the one who has committed any of these wrong actions, or usurped
the rights of others, or delayed it in such a way that it causedhim
harm or made him miss out on making profits, must do is returnit to
its rightful owner and repent to Allah, may He be exalted, from that
sin.
Al-Bukhaari (2449) narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased
with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah
be upon him) said: "Whoever has wronged his brother with regard to his
honour or anything else, let him seek his forgiveness today, before
(the Day when) there will be no dinars or dirhams, and ifhe has any
good deeds to his credit, they will betaken from him commensurate with
the wrong that he did, and if he does not have any good deeds to his
credit,bad deeds will be taken from his companion (i.e.,the one whom
he wronged) and added to his burden."And Allah knows best. - -
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