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Saturday, March 30, 2013

JOKES

Appu: I would like some crocodile shoes please. Pappu: Certainly, Sir!
What size shoe does your crocodile wear?
Good resolutions are likecollege girls. Easy to make, but hard to break.
By the time a man really does understand woman, his wife wont let him
out of the house at night.
Every man should have awife - preferably his own!
Insurance policy is an old man's passport to young women.
Appu: Would you consider going out with a man like me? Pappu: Yes, so
long as he is not too much like you.
Preeto: Were you excitedthe first time you asked your husband for
money? Jeeto: Oh, I was calm and collected.
Pappu: Doctor: I am having trouble with my breathing. Doctor: I will
give you something that will soon stop that.
A sign in a cafe: All drinking water in this cafe has been passed by
the management.
Preeto: I won't marry you, and you know why?Jeetho: No, I can't think.
Preeto: That's why.

JOKES

Appu: I would like some crocodile shoes please. Pappu: Certainly, Sir!
What size shoe does your crocodile wear?
Good resolutions are likecollege girls. Easy to make, but hard to break.
By the time a man really does understand woman, his wife wont let him
out of the house at night.
Every man should have awife - preferably his own!
Insurance policy is an old man's passport to young women.
Appu: Would you consider going out with a man like me? Pappu: Yes, so
long as he is not too much like you.
Preeto: Were you excitedthe first time you asked your husband for
money? Jeeto: Oh, I was calm and collected.
Pappu: Doctor: I am having trouble with my breathing. Doctor: I will
give you something that will soon stop that.
A sign in a cafe: All drinking water in this cafe has been passed by
the management.
Preeto: I won't marry you, and you know why?Jeetho: No, I can't think.
Preeto: That's why.

Hypocrites do not want to struggle for the morality of Islam to prevail throughout the world

They said, 'There are tyrants in it, Moses. We will not enter it until
they leave. If they leave it, then we will go in.' (Surat al-Ma'ida,
22)
They said, 'We will never enter it, Moses, as long as they are there.
So you and your Lord go and fight. We will stay sitting here.' (Surat
al-Ma'ida, 24)
Those who were left behind were glad to staybehind the Messenger
ofAllah. They did not want to do struggle with theirwealth and
themselves in the Way of Allah. They said, 'Do not go out to fight in
the heat.' Say: 'The Fire of Hell is much hotter, if they only
understood.' (Surat at-Tawba, 81)
When a sura is sent down saying: 'Believe in Allah and struggle
together with His Messenger,' those amongthem with wealth will ask you
to excuse them, saying, 'Let us remain with those who stay behind.'
They are pleased to be with thosewho stay behind. Their hearts have
been stamped so they do not understand. (Surat at-Tawba, 86-87)
You who believe! what is the matter with you that when you are told,
'Go out and fight in the way of Allah,' you sink down heavily to
theearth? Are you happier with this world than the Hereafter? Yet the
enjoyment of this world is very small compared to that of the
Hereafter. (Surat at-Tawba, 38)
Among you there are people who hang back and if you encounter a
setback then they say, 'Allah has blessed me in that I was not there
withthem.' (Surat an-Nisa', 72)
Do you not see those who were told: 'Hold back from fighting but
establish prayer and pay alms'? Then when fighting is prescribed
forthem, a group of them fear people as Allah should be feared, or
even more than that. They say, 'Our Lord, why have you prescribed
fighting for us? If only You would give us just a little more time!'
Say, 'The enjoyment of this world is very brief. The Hereafter is
better for those who have taqwa. You will not be wrongedby so much as
the smallest speck.' (Surat an-Nisa', 77)
Those who believe say, 'If only a sura could be sent down.' But whena
straightforward sura issent down and fighting is mentioned in it, you
see those with sickness in their hearts looking atyou with the look of
someone about to faint from fear of death... (Surah Muhammad, 20)
There are only grounds against those who ask you for permission to
stay when they are rich. They were pleased to be among those who were
left behind. Allah has sealed up their hearts so they do not know.
(Surat at-Tawba, 93)
If it had been a case of easy gains and a shortjourney, they would
have followed you, but the distance was too great for them. They
willswear by Allah: 'Had we been able to, we would have gone out with
you.' They are destroying their own selves. Allah knows that they are
lying. (Surat at-Tawba, 42)
They have sworn by Allah with their most earnest oaths that if you
give them the command,they will go out. Say: 'Do not swear. Honorable
obedience is enough. Allah is aware of what you do.' (Surat an-Nur,
53)

According to the Qur'an the dominion of the morality of Islam over the world is an obligation

In many verses of the Qur'an Allah promises the dominion of the
morality of Islam all overthe world. The promise of our All-Mighty
Lord is true and Allah never failsto keep His promise. Those who
believe in Allah also believe that Allah's promise will absolutely
come true. Because our All-Mighty Allah gives the news of the dominion
of the morality of Islam over the world and promises it, what befalls
to sincerebelievers is to pray for its realization by heart, demand it
and strive for it with all their might. Believing that morality of
Islam will reign and making effort for the realization of this blessed
event is obligatory for every Muslim who abides by the Qur'an. In one
verse our All-Mighty Allah says:
Allah has promised thoseof you who believe and do right actions that
He will make them successors in the land as He made those before them
successors, and willfirmly establish for them their religion with
which He is pleased and give them, in place of their fear, security.
'Theyworship Me, not associating anything with Me.' Any who are
unbelivers after that, such people are deviators. (Surat an-Nur, 55)
Some other verses in which Allah promises thedominion of the morality
of Islam over the world are as follows:
Allah has written, 'I will be victorious, I and and My Messengers.'
Allah is Most Strong, Almighty. (Surat al-Mujadala, 21)
They desire to extinguish Allah's Light with their mouths but Allah
will perfect His Light, though the unbelievers hate it. It is He Who
sent His Messenger with guidance and the Religion of Truth to exaltit
over every other religion, though the associaters hate it.
(Suratas-Saff, 8-9)
They desire to extinguish Allah's Light with their mouths. But Allah
refuses to do other than perfect His Light, even though the kafirun
detest it. It is He Who sent His Messenger with guidance and the
Religion of Truth to exaltit over every other deen,even though the
associaters detest it. (Surat a-Tawba, 32-33)
Allah confirms the Truth by His words, even though the evildoers hate
it. (Surah Yunus, 82)
Those before them plotted but all plotting belongs to Allah. He knows
what each self earns, and the unbelievers will soon know who has the
Ultimate Abode. (Surat ar-Ra'd, 42)
We destroyed generations before you when they did wrong. Their
Messengers brought them the clear signs, but they were never going to
have faith. That is how We repay evildoers. Then We appointed you
after them to be successors onthe earth so We might observe how you
would act. (Surah Yunus, 13-14)
That those people of pure natural belief in Allah who do not associate
any partners toHim will be the inheritors of this world is a divine
Law which is stressed in many verses of the Qur'an:
We wrote down in the Psalms, after the Reminder came: 'It is My
servants who are righteous who will inherit the earth.' (Surat
al-Anbiya, 105)
We will leave you the land to live in after them. That is the reward
of those who fear My station and fear My threat.' They asked for
Allah's victory, and everyobdurate tyrant failed. (Surah Ibrahim,
14-15)
Moses said to his people,'Seek help in Allah and be steadfast. The
earth belongs to Allah. He bequeathes it to any of His slaves He
wills. The successful outcome is forthose who fear [and respect
Allah].' They said,'We suffered harm before you came to us and after
you came to us.' He said, 'It may well be that your Lord is going to
destroy your enemy and make you the successors in the land so that He
can see how you behave.' (Surat al-A'raf, 128-129)
We destroyed generations before you when they did wrong. Their
Messengers brought them the clear signs, but they were never going to
have faith. That is how We repay evildoers. Then We appointed you
after them to be khalifs on theearth so We might observe how you would
act. (Surah Yunus, 13-14)
Rather We hurl the truth against falsehood and it cuts right through
it andit vanishes clean away! Woe without end for you for what you
portray! (Surat al-Anbiya, 18)