Engagment, Dought & clear, – * It is better to marry a non-relative or a relative?

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Is it better or preferable for a Muslim to marry someone he is not related to rather than a relative?".
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Praise be to Allaah.
A number of scholars regarded it as mustahabb for a man to marry a woman who is not related to him, and they gave a number of reasons for that:
1 – The child would have good characteristics, because he would take characteristics from his father’s side and his mother’s side.
2 – There is no guarantee that they will not separate which would lead to severing of the ties of kinship.
It says inal-Insaaf(8/16): It is mustahabb to choose a woman who is religiously committed and fertile, a virgin of good lineage who is not a relative. End quote.
It says inMataalib Ooli al-Nuha(5/9): A non-relative, because her children will have better characteristics, and because there is no guarantee that they will not separate, which in the case of marriage to a relative would lead to severing of the ties of kinship, which we are enjoined to uphold. And it is said that non-relatives give children with better characteristics and female cousins have more patience. End quote.
Al-Nawawi said inal-Manhaaj: It is mustahabb to choose a religiously committed virgin who is of good lineage but is not a close relative.” Al-Jalaal al-Mahalli said in hisSharh: “Not a close relative” means a non-relative or a distant relative. The one who is distantly related is better than one who is not related at all. End quote fromSharh al-Mahalli ma’a Haashiyat Qalyoobi wa ‘Umayrah, 3/208.
You can see that there is no text concerning this matter, rather it is the ijtihaad of the fuqaha’ which they based on these interests, which differ from one person to another, and from one type of relationship to another. A man may decide to marry a relative so as to protect her and honour her family, or she may be religiously committed and of good character.
The basic principle is that marriage is permissible. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) married Zaynab bint Jahsh who was the daughter of his paternal aunt, and he gave his daughter Zaynab in marriage to Abu’l-‘Aas who was the son of her maternal aunt, and ‘Ali married Faatimah, and he was the son of her father’s paternal uncle.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, after quoting the reasons that the fuqaha’ gave, of seeking good characteristics in the children and the fear of severing the ties of kinship:
What they said is true, but if there is someone among the relatives who is better in terms of other considerations (such as religious commitment, lineage and beauty), then that is better. In the event that they are equal in these terms, then a non-relative is better.
So if a female cousin is religiously committed and of good character, and he is in a weak position and needs kindness and support, then undoubtedly such a marriage serves a great interest. A man should pay attention to his interests in this case. There is no shar’i text concerning this matter that has to be followed, hence a person should do what he thinks is in his best interests. End quote fromal-Sharh al-Mumti’, 5/123.
The scholars of the Standing Committee were asked about marrying relatives and whether that causes retardation in the children.
They replied: There are no saheeh ahaadeeth which forbid marriage to relatives. The incidence of retardation happens by the will and decree of Allaah and is not caused by marriage to relatives as is widely believed. End quote.
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 18/13
And Allaah knows best.

PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI

Engagment, Dought & clear, – * It is haraam for a man to be alone with his fiancée or kiss her

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I hope that you can explain the following to me: does kissing the cheeks between an engaged couple mean that they must do the greater purification (ghusl)? What is the case if that is on the mouth?
Does the latter invalidate wudoo’ in the case of a married couple?.
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Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
A man and his fiancée are not married, rather she is still a “stranger” (non-mahram) to him until the marriage contract is completed. Based on this, it is not permissible for him to be alone with her or to travel with her, or to touch her or kiss her. No one should take this matter lightly, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If one of you were to be stabbed in the head with a needle of iron, that would be better for him than touching a woman who is not permissible for him.” Narrated by al-Tabaraani from the hadeeth of Ma’qil ibn Yasaar (may Allaah be pleased with him); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami(5045).
Concerning the ruling on touching one’s fiancée or being alone with her, al-Zayla’i (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: It is not permissible for him to touch her face or hands – even if there is no fear of desire – because she is still haraam for him and there is no need for that. End quote fromRadd al-Muhtaar ‘ala al-Durr al-Mukhtaar(5/237).
Ibn Qudaamah said: It is not permissible for him to be alone with her because she is still forbidden, and Islam does not allow anything but looking, so she remains forbidden for him. And because if he is alone with her there is no guarantee that something haraam will not happen. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man is alone with a woman but the Shaytaan is the third one present.” And he should not look at her with pleasure and desire, or in a dubious manner. End quote.
The Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) warned us against being alone with a non-mahram woman, and said: “No man is alone with a woman but the shaytaan is the third one present.” Narrated by Ahmad, al-Tirmidhi and al-Haakim; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani inSaheeh al-Jaami’(2546).
Secondly:
With regard to the greater purification (ghusl) being required because of kissing, that is not the case. Rather the greater purification is required if maniy (semen) is emitted or if intercourse takes place. This has been discussed in the answer to question no. 7529.
Thirdly:
With regard to wudoo’ being broken by touching a woman,
And Allaah knows best.

PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI

General Dought & clear, - * Refutation of those who claim that the hadiths which speak of executing the apostate are contrary to the Qur’an

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There is a sheikh by the name hassan al maliki he says that many sahih hadith are not authentic e.g he gives example of apostasy.He says that in the Quran it is written there is no compulsion in religion .
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Praise be to Allah
Firstly:
Each branch of knowledge, whether it has to do with shar ‘i knowledge or otherwise, has its principles and guidelines, and it is not permissible for anyone to speak about any branch of knowledge, whether to criticise an issue in that field or to declare it sound or weak, unless his words are based on knowledge and are in accordance with the principles and guidelines of this branch of knowledge.
No one who has not studied medicine, learned it or read about it has the right to criticise the most skilled doctor in the world for no reason other than the fact that his approach to medicine was not acceptable to this critic, and he thinks his approach is incorrect.
The same may be said about the science of hadith or other branches of Islamic knowledge: no one has the right to speak about this branch of knowledge unless he has knowledge of its principles and guidelines. We do not deny that there are fabricated hadiths that are falsely attributed to the Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), which we are certain that the Messenger did not say. And there are other hadiths that are weak, which we think most likely that the Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) did not say.
But to determine whether a particular hadith is fabricated or weak or sound must be based on knowledge, and must be in accordance with the principles and guidelines of the science of hadith, because the scholars have stipulated conditions for a hadith to be regarded as sound and be accepted. So the one who wants to identify a particular hadith as being weak must show us how these conditions (the conditions of a hadith being sound) are not met in this particular case.
But if his verdict is based on his own speculation and conjecture, or on what he thought was a contradiction, or some other thought in his mind, then this is not acceptable in the field of hadith, just as it is not acceptable in any other branch of knowledge.
Secondly:
With regard to the hadiths which speak about executing the one who apostatises from Islam, not one of the scholars has cast aspersions upon them; rather they are unanimously agreed that they are sound and must be acted upon.
Some of these hadiths meet the highest standards of soundness. Al-Bukhaari (6876) and Muslim (2676) narrated that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible to shed the blood of a Muslim who testifies that there is no god but Allah and that I am the Messenger of Allah except in three cases: a previously-married adulterer; a life for a life; and the one who leaves his religion and separates from the main body of Muslims.”
Part of this was also narrated by al-Bukhaari (6922), such as the hadith: “Whoever changes his religion, execute him.”
The scholars are unanimously agreed that all the hadiths inSaheeh al-BukhaariandSaheeh Muslimare saheeh, apart from a few reports narrated by Muslim only, or by al-Bukhaari only, which some scholars commented on, and explained their reservations concerning them. But other scholars disagreed with them and refuted their views. However, that was within the framework of academic debate and methodological research which is based on proof an evidence, not speculation and conjecture.
An-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said in the Introduction to his commentary onSaheeh Muslim(1/40, 41):
Shaykh Abu ‘Amr ibn as-Salaah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: Everything that Muslim deemed to be saheeh (sound) in this book is definitely saheeh … The same applies to everything that al-Bukhaari deemed to be saheeh in his book. That is because the ummah accepted it, apart from those whose opinion, whether it differs from or agrees with consensus, is of no significance.
He also said:
Whatever al-Bukhaari and Muslim agreed upon is definitely sound and proven with certainty, because the ummah accepted it. … And the ummah is unanimously agreed that whatever al-Bukhaari and Muslim agreed is sound, is true. End quote.
See also the answer to question no. 119516.
The Sahaabah (may Allah be pleased with them) and the scholars after them are agreed that these hadiths should be acted upon in the case of the apostate.
All of the Sahaabah agreed with Abu Bakr as-Siddeeq (may Allah be pleased with him) with regard to fighting the apostates. ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib (may Allah be pleased with him) executed a group of apostates during his era, and the Sahaabah agreed with him concerning that, except that some of them disagreed with the way in which he executed them. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him) thought that they should have been executed by the sword instead of burning, as ‘Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) did to them.
Al-Bukhaari (6922) narrated that ‘Ikrimah said: Some heretics were brought to ‘Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) and he burned them. News of that reached Ibn ‘Abbaas and he said: If it were me, I would not have burned them, because of the prohibition of the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him); do not punish with the punishment of Allah. But I would have executed them, because the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: Whoever changes his religion, execute him.”
Thirdly:
With regard to the words of Allah, may He be exalted, (interpretation of the meaning):“There is no compulsion in religion” [al-Baqarah 2:256], this verse does not contradict the command to execute the apostate, because what the verse means is that no one is to be forced to enter Islam, which is well-known from the biography of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), for he did not force anyone to become Muslim, neither the Jews nor the Christians nor the polytheists. Rather he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) would send his armies and instruct the commander of the army to give the polytheists the choice between either entering Islam or continuing to follow their religion and pay the jizyah, and no one would harm them. But if they refuse both options, then there was not choice left but to fight.
Muslim (1731) narrated that Buraydah said: When the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) appointed commanders for an army or expedition, he would advise them personally to fear Allah, may He be exalted, and to be good to those of the Muslims who were under their command. Then he said: “Fight in the name of Allah, for the sake of Allah. Fight those who disbelieve in Allah. Fight but do not steal from the war booty, do not break your promises, do not mutilate (the enemy dead) and do not kill children. When you meet your enemy among the polytheists, offer them three options, and whichever one they choose, accept it from them and refrain from (fighting) them. Invite them to Islam and if they respond, then accept it from them and refrain from (fighting) them… If they refuse, then ask them to pay jizyah. If they respond, then accept it from them and refrain from (fighting) them. If they refuse that, then seek the help of Allah and fight them.”
So no one is forced to enter Islam, but if he enters the faith and becomes Muslim voluntarily, then he is bound to abide by its rulings, whether he wants to or not, and one of the rulings of Islam is that the one who apostatises from the faith is to be executed.
This is like a person who has never travelled to some country; he is not obliged to travel to it or enter that country, and its laws do not apply to him, so long as he is in some other country and has not travelled there. But if he does travel there, then he is bound by its laws and will be subject to them, and they will be applied to him, whether he wants that or not.
And Allah knows best.

PUBLISHERM.NajimudeeN. MD,IRI