'' Our Lord ! grant us good in this world and good in the hereafter and save us from the torment of the Fire '' [Ameen]
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{in Arab} :->
Rabbanaa aatinaa fid-dunyaa hasanatan wafil aakhirati hasanatan waqinaa 'athaaban-naar/-
(Surah Al-Baqarah ,verse 201)
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Question:
I am searching for a wife online. SunniPath Q&A's seem to discourage or even seem to hint at prohibiting instant messaging with a prospective spouse. However, I can't seem to figure out how then email or phone would be any different. Phone is also "instant", and when you need to get to know someone then emails could be going back and forth pretty quickly, such that it's almost like chatting, but only slower. If 2 people are outgoing and talkative, then the risk of getting informal on the phone would probably be just as high as through instant messaging. Thus, I really don't believe that instant messaging with a prospective spouse in itself would be haram, rather it would depend on how you use it. Could you please confirm? When you need to get to know someone, instant messaging would make things a lot more quicker and perhaps effective than email.
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful.
Dear Brother,
I pray this message reaches you in good health, lofty spirits, and strong iman.
Generally, it is improper to engage in conversation with an unrelated member of the opposite sex without need. However, as indicated in previous SunniPath answers, it is permitted to talk to a member of the opposite sex when there is some purpose. Obviously, talking to someone with the intention of getting to know that person for marriage is both purposeful and permissible.
Please see Can I Talk To My Fiancé?and Instant messaging with the opposite sex. Both of these answers address your question. Obviously, if you are searching for a wife online, any communication with that sister will be online. Nonetheless, whichever method you choose to communicate, please be sure to mutually adhere to Islamic adab. One usually knows when one has crossed those boundaries. If you have any doubts, then that is a definite indication that you need to find a better way to communicate. As a matter of caution, you should avoid chatting in private, and, particularly, at night. It's very easy for an ostensibly legitimate conversation to digress into gray areas.
I hope everything works out for you.
And Allah knows best.
PUBLISHER 
" M_NajimudeeN "
" M_NajimudeeN "
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