Let us consider a scientific theory, the Big Bang for instance. This
theory was first proposed on the basis of a suspicion and a hypothesis
based on Einstein's theory of relativity. Following that, the search
began for the evidence needed to prove that this huge explosion
happened. This evidence did really exist. The cosmic microwave
background radiation confirming the explosion in question was found
and the isotopic nature of the universe (the fact that all space is at
-270oC) was discovered. It was also scientifically proved that the
universe is constantly expanding, and this was another important and
definitive piece of evidence confirming the theory in question.
Therefore, the Big Bang theory became one whose every claim had been
tested, confirmed and thus proved.
Darwin's theory of evolution was also launched under the name of a
"hypothesis." (In fact, the reason for the launching of the theory of
evolution was entirely ideological, but it was presented under the
guise of a scientific theory.) In order for this theory to be regarded
as valid, its claims would have to be proved, just like those of the
Big Bang. For that it would have to be observed whether or not the
imaginary mechanisms of evolution did in fact cause evolution. The
progress of 20th-century science proved that "natural selection,"
Darwin's illusory evolutionary mechanism, played no evolutionary role.
The science of genetics also inflicted a disappointment on
neo-Darwinists, who had lost hope in natural selection and sought to
depict mutation as an evolutionary mechanism instead. Following the
realization that mutations had no evolutionary effect either, it was
now the turn of the fossil record—Darwin and Darwinists' greatest
hope. The conclusion demonstrated by the fossil record, however, came
as a terrible shock to Darwinists! None of the imaginary intermediate
form fossils that had been sought for so many years existed anywhere
on Earth. Deeper research changed nothing. Not one single intermediate
form fossil has ever been found as a result of all the research that
has been conducted to date.
Unwilling to abandon the false religion they adhered to, Darwinists
for years continued to hope that evidence for Darwinism would be
forthcoming. But none of the anticipated but illusory evidence ever
appeared. Despite this however, Darwinist lies never ended, and
pro-Darwinist demagoguery was stubbornly kept up. The interesting
thing is that despite the passage of 150 years, the failure to obtain
a single piece of evidence, and despite the fact that the conclusion
produced by genetics and the fossil record proved the fact of
Creation, Darwinists still imagine this false religion can survive.
But they are making a terrible error, of course. In fact, even the
proponents of the theory are aware that evolution never happened in
the history of life. They have clearly seen this as the result of
countless pieces of scientific evidence.
Despite all the foregoing, since the theory of evolution is an
ideology, a false religion needing to be propped up by its adherents
no matter what, Darwinists still need to maintain this false image of
their theory having a scientific nature. That is the reason why
Darwinists have resorted to fraud, speculation and countless
propaganda techniques to keep this false religion alive for the last
150 years. As a requirement of their false religion, Darwinists have
no other option to inculcate people with the idea that their theory is
"true." Because there is no scientific evidence for the truth of the
theory, they try to give the impression that "scientific evidence does
exist."
In his bookCreative Defense, Nicholas Comninellis from the University
of Missouri-Kansas City describes the position in which this terrible
deception will find itself in the future:
Philosophically, the dogma of evolution is a dream, a theory without a
vestige of truth. Within fifty years, children in school will read of
extraordinary popular delusions, and this will be mentioned as one of
the most absurd. Many a merry jest will be uttered bearing upon the
follies of nineteenth century science.1
Comninellis's analysis is an accurate one. The theory of evolution
consists of a false claim and the history of the theory is filled with
countless examples of fraud. Every claim and piece of evidence
produced by evolution is a fraud. The true nature, the true face of
all these frauds has been exposed. But the supporters of the religion
of Darwinism try to gloss over this or make people forget it. But no
matter how much they squirm, the whole world has begun to realize that
Darwinist propaganda rests on rotten foundations. As Comninellis says,
future generations will be amazed at the global effect of this
terrible deception and how it was supported by world-renowned
professors and scientists, and will ridicule this enormous
irrationality for quite a while.
The Dajjal tried to turn people away from Allah (God) through such
false methods. But all his plans have now been thwarted. The method he
employed, that is Darwinism, has now begun becoming a subject of
ridicule, even for children. The whole world will soon remember the
nonsense of Darwinism with horror and shame. This is very certainly a
snare from our Almighty Lord, a response to those who would rebel
against Him. As He reveals in one verse:
The evil actions they did assailed them. They were engulfed by what
they mocked. (Surat an-Nahl, 34)
1Nicholas Comninellis, Creative Defense, Evidence Against Evolution,
Master Books, 2001, p. 254
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Wednesday, September 18, 2013
Darwinists have deceived the world with fraud
Due striving for Allah' s approval
Man strives hard to attain worldly favors, on which he sets his mind
as being the ultimate goal in life. He does his utmost to gain
material prosperity, recognition of social status or some other
worldly benefit. For"a paltry price" (Surat at-Tawba: 9)that will slip
out of his hands in a very short while, he makes an all-out effort.
Muslims, who aspire to a much greater reward, that is, to the approval
of Allah and His Garden, also strive hard for their cause.A believer
strives with "all due striving" for the approbation of Allah and for
the Hereafter. He "sells" his property and his life for the cause of
Allah.
No difficulty a believer encounters in the way of Allah thwarts his
commitment, provided that he has sold "his property and self" to
Allah. Nothing but Allah's approbation has any attraction for him.
Aware that he is not the "owner" of his body and property, he never
follows the vain desires of the self (nafs). Allah is the owner of his
body and everything he owns, and they will be put to service in
compliance with Allah's will.
The only criterion for being a believer is to feel a sincere desire to
seek Allah's approval and not to refrain from making any sacrifices on
the way of Allah when circumstances call for such sacrifices.
Believers are those who are"purified with a pure thought, remembrance
of the Home (of the Hereafter)" (Surah Sad: 46).A believer does not
seek any benefit other than Allah's approbation. He hopes to please
Allah, have His mercy and attain Paradise, because"anyone, male or
female, who does right actions and is a believer, will enter Paradise.
They will not be wronged by so much as the tiniest speck." (Surat
an-Nisa': 124)
Paradise is the abode of those who"believe with certainty"in Allah and
the Hereafter(Surah Luqman: 4)and then "strive with all due striving"
in the way of Allah. The end of those who "worship Allah right on the
fringe of true faith" and place their trivial worldly interests right
next to the pleasure of Allah is described thus in the Qur'an:
Among the people there are some who profess to serve Allah but who
stand on the very fringe of good faith. If good befalls them, they are
content, but if an ordeal befalls them, they revert to their former
ways, losing both this world and the hereafter. That way true
perdition lies. (Surat al-Hajj: 11)
Believers are covetous of the Hereafter. Allah promises believers a
beautiful endless life in the hereafter. Our Lord promises believers
that He will give a good life to His believing servants in this world,
too. Yet this in no way means that they will not encounter any
hardship and troubles in this world. The afflictions they encounter
are devised to put them to the test and make them more mature.
The obstacles a believer encounters are ostensibly difficult
situations; but once met with submission, Allah relieves him of all
difficulties. For instance, when his people attempted to cast the
Prophet Ibrahim (as) into the fire because of his faith, his response
was the one peculiar to a Muslim; he favored being thrown into the
fire over turning away from his faith or Allah's commands. Being cast
into a fire is the most terrible physical suffering that might befall
any human being in this world. However, Ibrahim (as), who faced this
trial from Allah in the most submissive manner, was saved from this
seemingly trying experience by the will of Allah, and no harm came to
him.
He said, "Do you then worship, instead of Allah, what cannot help or
harm you in any way? Shame on you and what you worship besides Allah!
Will you not use your intellect?" They said, "Burn him and avenge your
deities if you are resolved to punish him!" We said, "Fire, be
coolness and peace for Ibrahim!" They sought to trap him but We made
them the losers. (Surat al-Anbiya': 66-70)
Conclusively, no distress, difficulty or sorrow affect a believer who
seeks Allah's consent and observes His commands. This is demonstrated
in the course of events by which Allah puts a believer's
determination, patience and submission to the test. These are
outwardly troublesome and difficult events; but if met with patience
and submission they allow the individual to discover Allah's mercy.
This aside, Allah informs us in the Qur'an that He does not burden any
soul with more than it can bear:
Allah does not impose on any self any more than it can stand. (Surat
al-Baqara: 286)
Allah does not punish a believer who duly serves Him, neither in this
world nor in the Hereafter. On the contrary, He rewards him most
bountifully both in this world and beyond:
When the righteous are asked, "What has your Lord sent down?" their
reply is, "That which is best." There is good in the world for those
who do good, but far better is the reward of the life to come. How
wonderful is the abode of the righteous: The Gardens of Eden which
they enter, with rivers flowing under them, where they shall have
whatever they desire. That is how Allah repays the righteous. (Surat
an-Nahl: 30-31)
As a reminder from Allah, torment, difficulty and trouble are
inflicted on those who fail to seek the approval of Allah, who do not
demonstrate absolute submission to Him but rather observe the wishes
of their own souls. When believers make a mistake, they consider the
trouble and difficulties they suffer as a consequence as a merciful
warning from Allah, carefully derive lessons from them, repent and
amend their conduct. Unbelievers, however, never learn from the
ordeals they undergo, thereby deserving eternal torment in the
Hereafter.
as being the ultimate goal in life. He does his utmost to gain
material prosperity, recognition of social status or some other
worldly benefit. For"a paltry price" (Surat at-Tawba: 9)that will slip
out of his hands in a very short while, he makes an all-out effort.
Muslims, who aspire to a much greater reward, that is, to the approval
of Allah and His Garden, also strive hard for their cause.A believer
strives with "all due striving" for the approbation of Allah and for
the Hereafter. He "sells" his property and his life for the cause of
Allah.
No difficulty a believer encounters in the way of Allah thwarts his
commitment, provided that he has sold "his property and self" to
Allah. Nothing but Allah's approbation has any attraction for him.
Aware that he is not the "owner" of his body and property, he never
follows the vain desires of the self (nafs). Allah is the owner of his
body and everything he owns, and they will be put to service in
compliance with Allah's will.
The only criterion for being a believer is to feel a sincere desire to
seek Allah's approval and not to refrain from making any sacrifices on
the way of Allah when circumstances call for such sacrifices.
Believers are those who are"purified with a pure thought, remembrance
of the Home (of the Hereafter)" (Surah Sad: 46).A believer does not
seek any benefit other than Allah's approbation. He hopes to please
Allah, have His mercy and attain Paradise, because"anyone, male or
female, who does right actions and is a believer, will enter Paradise.
They will not be wronged by so much as the tiniest speck." (Surat
an-Nisa': 124)
Paradise is the abode of those who"believe with certainty"in Allah and
the Hereafter(Surah Luqman: 4)and then "strive with all due striving"
in the way of Allah. The end of those who "worship Allah right on the
fringe of true faith" and place their trivial worldly interests right
next to the pleasure of Allah is described thus in the Qur'an:
Among the people there are some who profess to serve Allah but who
stand on the very fringe of good faith. If good befalls them, they are
content, but if an ordeal befalls them, they revert to their former
ways, losing both this world and the hereafter. That way true
perdition lies. (Surat al-Hajj: 11)
Believers are covetous of the Hereafter. Allah promises believers a
beautiful endless life in the hereafter. Our Lord promises believers
that He will give a good life to His believing servants in this world,
too. Yet this in no way means that they will not encounter any
hardship and troubles in this world. The afflictions they encounter
are devised to put them to the test and make them more mature.
The obstacles a believer encounters are ostensibly difficult
situations; but once met with submission, Allah relieves him of all
difficulties. For instance, when his people attempted to cast the
Prophet Ibrahim (as) into the fire because of his faith, his response
was the one peculiar to a Muslim; he favored being thrown into the
fire over turning away from his faith or Allah's commands. Being cast
into a fire is the most terrible physical suffering that might befall
any human being in this world. However, Ibrahim (as), who faced this
trial from Allah in the most submissive manner, was saved from this
seemingly trying experience by the will of Allah, and no harm came to
him.
He said, "Do you then worship, instead of Allah, what cannot help or
harm you in any way? Shame on you and what you worship besides Allah!
Will you not use your intellect?" They said, "Burn him and avenge your
deities if you are resolved to punish him!" We said, "Fire, be
coolness and peace for Ibrahim!" They sought to trap him but We made
them the losers. (Surat al-Anbiya': 66-70)
Conclusively, no distress, difficulty or sorrow affect a believer who
seeks Allah's consent and observes His commands. This is demonstrated
in the course of events by which Allah puts a believer's
determination, patience and submission to the test. These are
outwardly troublesome and difficult events; but if met with patience
and submission they allow the individual to discover Allah's mercy.
This aside, Allah informs us in the Qur'an that He does not burden any
soul with more than it can bear:
Allah does not impose on any self any more than it can stand. (Surat
al-Baqara: 286)
Allah does not punish a believer who duly serves Him, neither in this
world nor in the Hereafter. On the contrary, He rewards him most
bountifully both in this world and beyond:
When the righteous are asked, "What has your Lord sent down?" their
reply is, "That which is best." There is good in the world for those
who do good, but far better is the reward of the life to come. How
wonderful is the abode of the righteous: The Gardens of Eden which
they enter, with rivers flowing under them, where they shall have
whatever they desire. That is how Allah repays the righteous. (Surat
an-Nahl: 30-31)
As a reminder from Allah, torment, difficulty and trouble are
inflicted on those who fail to seek the approval of Allah, who do not
demonstrate absolute submission to Him but rather observe the wishes
of their own souls. When believers make a mistake, they consider the
trouble and difficulties they suffer as a consequence as a merciful
warning from Allah, carefully derive lessons from them, repent and
amend their conduct. Unbelievers, however, never learn from the
ordeals they undergo, thereby deserving eternal torment in the
Hereafter.
Life in the society of ignorance
One of the most significant characteristics of someone who can
appreciate Allah's might and thus reorients all his deeds to earn
Allah's blessing, is his liberating himself from all beings other than
Allah. Having his life focused on earning His approval and being a
servant to Him, he develops a different outlook on the universe, which
he knows is created and controlled by Allah. Since he considers Allah
as the only god, the false deities surrounding him lose their meaning.
The lives of those lacking true faith, unlike those of the believers,
are subservient to countless false deities. Such people devote their
entire lives to gaining the approval of countless people, and when
they seek help, it is from other people. In reality, however, the
creatures an unbeliever idolizes in his mind are nothing but weak
"servants," just like himself. The deadlock these people face is
related in the Qur'an as follows:
They have taken [other] deities besides Allah [Alone], hoping that
they may be helped. They cannot help them, even though they are an
army mobilized in their support. (Surah Ya Sin: 74-75)
Unbelievers base their entire lives on this very distorted rationale.
There emerges from this another important difference between believers
and unbelievers: Believers adopt the criteria laid down by Allah as
their only guidance. They observe the commands of the Qur'an, the just
Book and the Sunnah of the Prophet (saas). Their religion is Islam,
which is explained in detail in the Qur'an and is presented to us
through the exemplary of the life of the Prophet (saas).
People who lead their lives in a state oblivious of Allah will surely
accept the criteria laid down by the imaginary deities rather than the
criteria set forth by Allah. Unlike Islam, the one and immutable law
of Allah, theirs is a polytheistic religion. These people have various
conflicting rules and goals imposed by society. This being the case,
the polytheistic religions they abide by take various forms.
Some of them aim at money and power, while others desire a prestigious
and influential status. Some aspire to find a "good spouse" and have a
"happy family life." This diversity that engenders different life
styles and accordingly different "religions" is, in fact, based on the
failure to grasp Allah's existence and His limits.
However, man is, by nature, inclined to trust Allah and be a servant
to Him. Unable to fulfill his infinite needs and desires by himself,
by nature, he tends to turn to Allah alone. Accordingly, the nature of
man is inclined to recognize Allah as his Lord:
So, as a pure and natural believer, set your face firmly towards the
faith, Allah's natural pattern on which He made mankind. There is no
changing Allah's creation. That is the true faith—but most people do
not know it. (Surat ar-Rum: 30)
Said Nursi, the renowned Turkish scholar, explains how man fails to
understand that his real duty is to be a servant to Allah and adds:"…
They unwisely concluded that life is a struggle."
This rationale, subscribed to by those who do not live according to
the values of the Qur'an, is one of the fundamental tenets of their
religion. It is due to the rationale in question that these people
always suffer feelings of distress and tension:
- The majority of these people, unlike believers, are selfish,
self-seeking people whose only concern is to benefit themselves.
- They lack the delicate disposition that develops with
self-sacrifice. Their love is based on gaining advantage; they love a
person not because of his good values or attributes but because it is
in their interest to love him.
- Those whom they consider to be their loved ones, too, approach them
with the same rationale, which creates a relationship bereft of
loyalty. They always feel concerned about the potential unfaithfulness
of their partners, since they know that at any time they may find
others who are wealthier or more beautiful…
- They are consumed by jealousy, a trait that prevents them from
taking pleasure in beauties and blessings. For example, instead of
taking pleasure in someone's beauty and saying "How beautifully Allah
has created him or her," they feel restless and ask, "Why am I not as
good looking and beautiful as him or her?"
- They do not feel grateful to Allah or are not contented with their
blessings. With such a disposition, they always want to possess more.
This insatiable desire becomes a constant source of uneasiness.
- Unable to accept their feebleness and weaknesses, they do not ask
for help from Allah. They assume they will get rid of their weaknesses
if they turn away from Allah haughtily without asking Him for help.
However, this is not the way to get rid of their weaknesses. At this
time too, they turn to others and pin their hopes on them. Yet those
they turn to are also weak individuals who only think about their own
benefit. Moreover, they are far from being merciful and compassionate.
This being the case, they often feel "depressed," and lose their
spirit through a failure to satisfy their expectations.
- They lack forgiveness and tolerance. For this reason, even a minor
disagreement among them is likely to develop into a clash or conflict.
Most of the time, each party makes it a matter of pride to refuse to
accept being the one in the wrong. For this reason, they often feel
distressed.
- They do not believe that they live in a world under Allah's
protection and control, but rather in a ruthless jungle where they
have to "defeat" others to survive. According to their misguided idea,
they assume they have to develop a tough, aggressive and egoist
character to be able to survive in this "jungle." Indeed, their
attitude matches what they encounter. They are either, as the society
of ignorance calls it, swallowed up, as in the example of the "small
fish," or they grow into a "big and cruel" fish and swallow others.
These laws apply to almost all societies where people do not
experience true faith, and behave according to the mistaken morality
described above. The Qur'an calls these societies "ignorant and
behavent," because they are entirely unaware of Allah and the
Hereafter.
appreciate Allah's might and thus reorients all his deeds to earn
Allah's blessing, is his liberating himself from all beings other than
Allah. Having his life focused on earning His approval and being a
servant to Him, he develops a different outlook on the universe, which
he knows is created and controlled by Allah. Since he considers Allah
as the only god, the false deities surrounding him lose their meaning.
The lives of those lacking true faith, unlike those of the believers,
are subservient to countless false deities. Such people devote their
entire lives to gaining the approval of countless people, and when
they seek help, it is from other people. In reality, however, the
creatures an unbeliever idolizes in his mind are nothing but weak
"servants," just like himself. The deadlock these people face is
related in the Qur'an as follows:
They have taken [other] deities besides Allah [Alone], hoping that
they may be helped. They cannot help them, even though they are an
army mobilized in their support. (Surah Ya Sin: 74-75)
Unbelievers base their entire lives on this very distorted rationale.
There emerges from this another important difference between believers
and unbelievers: Believers adopt the criteria laid down by Allah as
their only guidance. They observe the commands of the Qur'an, the just
Book and the Sunnah of the Prophet (saas). Their religion is Islam,
which is explained in detail in the Qur'an and is presented to us
through the exemplary of the life of the Prophet (saas).
People who lead their lives in a state oblivious of Allah will surely
accept the criteria laid down by the imaginary deities rather than the
criteria set forth by Allah. Unlike Islam, the one and immutable law
of Allah, theirs is a polytheistic religion. These people have various
conflicting rules and goals imposed by society. This being the case,
the polytheistic religions they abide by take various forms.
Some of them aim at money and power, while others desire a prestigious
and influential status. Some aspire to find a "good spouse" and have a
"happy family life." This diversity that engenders different life
styles and accordingly different "religions" is, in fact, based on the
failure to grasp Allah's existence and His limits.
However, man is, by nature, inclined to trust Allah and be a servant
to Him. Unable to fulfill his infinite needs and desires by himself,
by nature, he tends to turn to Allah alone. Accordingly, the nature of
man is inclined to recognize Allah as his Lord:
So, as a pure and natural believer, set your face firmly towards the
faith, Allah's natural pattern on which He made mankind. There is no
changing Allah's creation. That is the true faith—but most people do
not know it. (Surat ar-Rum: 30)
Said Nursi, the renowned Turkish scholar, explains how man fails to
understand that his real duty is to be a servant to Allah and adds:"…
They unwisely concluded that life is a struggle."
This rationale, subscribed to by those who do not live according to
the values of the Qur'an, is one of the fundamental tenets of their
religion. It is due to the rationale in question that these people
always suffer feelings of distress and tension:
- The majority of these people, unlike believers, are selfish,
self-seeking people whose only concern is to benefit themselves.
- They lack the delicate disposition that develops with
self-sacrifice. Their love is based on gaining advantage; they love a
person not because of his good values or attributes but because it is
in their interest to love him.
- Those whom they consider to be their loved ones, too, approach them
with the same rationale, which creates a relationship bereft of
loyalty. They always feel concerned about the potential unfaithfulness
of their partners, since they know that at any time they may find
others who are wealthier or more beautiful…
- They are consumed by jealousy, a trait that prevents them from
taking pleasure in beauties and blessings. For example, instead of
taking pleasure in someone's beauty and saying "How beautifully Allah
has created him or her," they feel restless and ask, "Why am I not as
good looking and beautiful as him or her?"
- They do not feel grateful to Allah or are not contented with their
blessings. With such a disposition, they always want to possess more.
This insatiable desire becomes a constant source of uneasiness.
- Unable to accept their feebleness and weaknesses, they do not ask
for help from Allah. They assume they will get rid of their weaknesses
if they turn away from Allah haughtily without asking Him for help.
However, this is not the way to get rid of their weaknesses. At this
time too, they turn to others and pin their hopes on them. Yet those
they turn to are also weak individuals who only think about their own
benefit. Moreover, they are far from being merciful and compassionate.
This being the case, they often feel "depressed," and lose their
spirit through a failure to satisfy their expectations.
- They lack forgiveness and tolerance. For this reason, even a minor
disagreement among them is likely to develop into a clash or conflict.
Most of the time, each party makes it a matter of pride to refuse to
accept being the one in the wrong. For this reason, they often feel
distressed.
- They do not believe that they live in a world under Allah's
protection and control, but rather in a ruthless jungle where they
have to "defeat" others to survive. According to their misguided idea,
they assume they have to develop a tough, aggressive and egoist
character to be able to survive in this "jungle." Indeed, their
attitude matches what they encounter. They are either, as the society
of ignorance calls it, swallowed up, as in the example of the "small
fish," or they grow into a "big and cruel" fish and swallow others.
These laws apply to almost all societies where people do not
experience true faith, and behave according to the mistaken morality
described above. The Qur'an calls these societies "ignorant and
behavent," because they are entirely unaware of Allah and the
Hereafter.
Story, - Facebook love. The happy ending
hi,im bithi. i read in 12 nd um 18. my story isnt realy a story. its
the reality of my life. my story starts somehow like this...
When i was in cls 10 nd aftr my ssc test xm i met a guy named kabir in
facebook. he s 4m dhaka city. nd i lived in ctg. a quite far away. he
seemd nice. so we startd chatting n calling n talking. . . . :-)
Aftr about a week he proposd me n next day i acceptd him. actually i
was in love wid him 4m b4. he is still unknown 2 this. aftr about a
month my dad died. nd my family came 2 know about him nd they csd my
phn nd bcoz of me my family situation was too hot. so i had2 brk up.
bt i never stopd loving him. by da way he is my 1st bf. nd ofcoz last.
aftr about 4 mnth i got my phn back. nd a new sim. so at 1st i jst
send him a sms widout my name. i was so scared thinking mayb he wont
reply. i thought he s forgot me nd got a new gf. bt i was wrong. he
recognisd me though i didt write my name. i was so surprisd reading
his reply. my eyes became wet. i started crying. thn we restarted our
relationship. aftes ths new starting we dated 2 times. bt it wasnt da
1st tym. we dated 1st after my ssc board xm. nd b4 my break up nd
after my dads death. (my dad died during my board xm)it was our 1st
metting. tht tym i 4got tht i hav lost my dad. i was so happy.
anyway... b4 my 3rd date i came 2 know my moms trying 2 marry me off.
i told him about it on the date. nd we made a plan. accordng to the
plan one day i came 2 the place where kabir was waiting. thn he took
me wid him to his hometown nd tht evening we got married. whn my
family came 2 know bout it they rejectd us. bt kabirs family didnt
react as we thought. they accepted us.
the reality of my life. my story starts somehow like this...
When i was in cls 10 nd aftr my ssc test xm i met a guy named kabir in
facebook. he s 4m dhaka city. nd i lived in ctg. a quite far away. he
seemd nice. so we startd chatting n calling n talking. . . . :-)
Aftr about a week he proposd me n next day i acceptd him. actually i
was in love wid him 4m b4. he is still unknown 2 this. aftr about a
month my dad died. nd my family came 2 know about him nd they csd my
phn nd bcoz of me my family situation was too hot. so i had2 brk up.
bt i never stopd loving him. by da way he is my 1st bf. nd ofcoz last.
aftr about 4 mnth i got my phn back. nd a new sim. so at 1st i jst
send him a sms widout my name. i was so scared thinking mayb he wont
reply. i thought he s forgot me nd got a new gf. bt i was wrong. he
recognisd me though i didt write my name. i was so surprisd reading
his reply. my eyes became wet. i started crying. thn we restarted our
relationship. aftes ths new starting we dated 2 times. bt it wasnt da
1st tym. we dated 1st after my ssc board xm. nd b4 my break up nd
after my dads death. (my dad died during my board xm)it was our 1st
metting. tht tym i 4got tht i hav lost my dad. i was so happy.
anyway... b4 my 3rd date i came 2 know my moms trying 2 marry me off.
i told him about it on the date. nd we made a plan. accordng to the
plan one day i came 2 the place where kabir was waiting. thn he took
me wid him to his hometown nd tht evening we got married. whn my
family came 2 know bout it they rejectd us. bt kabirs family didnt
react as we thought. they accepted us.
Story, - Miss
Sunny morning, birds chirping merrily, singing morning dew brings
daydreams fly a farm boy in the foothills of Bali. Others are busy
with their own activities - each as if - as if no one was around them
and silence the little boy lost in reverie.
Arrived - he heard a loud scream of a grandmother calling out his
name, "Ketut ,,,, Ketut ,,,, come here Boy a minute?" That Boys
briefly turned toward the voice and the half lazy to move from where
he was sitting day dreaming, looking at a stretch of verdant rice
fields. "What's Grandma ,,,, call Me?" "Go into the village for a
while, take this order Mr. Wayan, ask for money wages to make this
tool, then go to the market, there are some foods that need to be
purchased is also a pack of cigarettes for your grandfather, huh?"
So the boy went to the village to bring a few pieces of equipment
ordered. She ran to the shack and take an old bike the relic - the
only of his parents. Slowly but surely, he's riding a bike to a
straight path toward the village.
Arrived half way through the narrow, high-speed truck hit the little
boy ,,,, Bike boy bounced wrecked and he himself fell into the river
which luckily was not too big river. Very unfortunate fate of the
little boy because after crashing truck, they run into the city.
A gentle breeze , sting sun falls on the face, making Ketut slowly -
land eye-opening. Feels sting of sunlight piercing eyes, yet he could
see clearly but he felt a tiny hand to touch the forehead, soft and
cold, also rubbed - rub the hands and feet were full of sores. Of
course a beautiful girl there.
"My name is Putu, do you good - right? I was just about to go to town
but arrived I saw you fall in the river, I was worried and trying to
help you." "Yeah,,,, I'm fine , I remember I hit a truck but the truck
was probably scared and fled, leaving Me alone,,,, Thanks for helping
me."
The girl was taking a bottle of water and a piece of cake and gave it
to Ketut. Ketut greedily drank and ate cake. The higher the sun
shining on the earth accompanied by wind gusts brought exuberant rural
two small children who take shelter under the shade of mango trees.
"You're better now ,,,,, If so, should we fast - get out of here,
we'll see a doctor check you because it looks serious injury, let I
help you up." Smiling, the girl reached out his hand to help his - was
standing. Then they walked hand in hand toward the village.
That's a little friendship started with a bottle of water and a piece
of cake, chuck sincere and help given to a friend, make a beautiful
day.
And birds - the birds were chirping again, singing hymns Bali,
describe how wonderful the atmosphere at the foot of Bukit Bali,,,,,
and closing twilight,,,, they both split up, go home - each with a
glimmer of hope tomorrow will be more beautiful of the day.
daydreams fly a farm boy in the foothills of Bali. Others are busy
with their own activities - each as if - as if no one was around them
and silence the little boy lost in reverie.
Arrived - he heard a loud scream of a grandmother calling out his
name, "Ketut ,,,, Ketut ,,,, come here Boy a minute?" That Boys
briefly turned toward the voice and the half lazy to move from where
he was sitting day dreaming, looking at a stretch of verdant rice
fields. "What's Grandma ,,,, call Me?" "Go into the village for a
while, take this order Mr. Wayan, ask for money wages to make this
tool, then go to the market, there are some foods that need to be
purchased is also a pack of cigarettes for your grandfather, huh?"
So the boy went to the village to bring a few pieces of equipment
ordered. She ran to the shack and take an old bike the relic - the
only of his parents. Slowly but surely, he's riding a bike to a
straight path toward the village.
Arrived half way through the narrow, high-speed truck hit the little
boy ,,,, Bike boy bounced wrecked and he himself fell into the river
which luckily was not too big river. Very unfortunate fate of the
little boy because after crashing truck, they run into the city.
A gentle breeze , sting sun falls on the face, making Ketut slowly -
land eye-opening. Feels sting of sunlight piercing eyes, yet he could
see clearly but he felt a tiny hand to touch the forehead, soft and
cold, also rubbed - rub the hands and feet were full of sores. Of
course a beautiful girl there.
"My name is Putu, do you good - right? I was just about to go to town
but arrived I saw you fall in the river, I was worried and trying to
help you." "Yeah,,,, I'm fine , I remember I hit a truck but the truck
was probably scared and fled, leaving Me alone,,,, Thanks for helping
me."
The girl was taking a bottle of water and a piece of cake and gave it
to Ketut. Ketut greedily drank and ate cake. The higher the sun
shining on the earth accompanied by wind gusts brought exuberant rural
two small children who take shelter under the shade of mango trees.
"You're better now ,,,,, If so, should we fast - get out of here,
we'll see a doctor check you because it looks serious injury, let I
help you up." Smiling, the girl reached out his hand to help his - was
standing. Then they walked hand in hand toward the village.
That's a little friendship started with a bottle of water and a piece
of cake, chuck sincere and help given to a friend, make a beautiful
day.
And birds - the birds were chirping again, singing hymns Bali,
describe how wonderful the atmosphere at the foot of Bukit Bali,,,,,
and closing twilight,,,, they both split up, go home - each with a
glimmer of hope tomorrow will be more beautiful of the day.
Fathwa, - Niqab in Ihram
Question:
Is it necessary for a woman to cover her face during Ihram (during
Umrah/Hajj)? Will she be excused for not covering her face due to the
difficulties associated with niqabs hanging from baseball caps?
Insha'Allah as soon as my state of Ihram is complete, I would wear the
Niqab but what about during the days of ihram?
Answer:
In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,
The ruling in the Hanafi Madhhab (and even in other madhhabs) is that,
although the face is not considered to be part of one�s nakedness
(awra), it is necessary to cover it, due to the fitna involved in not
doing so. This is the transmitted position in the Hanafi School, as
mentioned in virtually all the major fiqh books.
Some contemporary scholars have a more lenient approach to this issue,
especially in the West. However, my understanding is (according to
what I have learnt from my teachers) that a woman is required to cover
her face even in the west except in dire situations.
As such, if you are travelling for Hajj, and you normally cover your
face at home, then you must cover it whilst in the state of Ihram
also. However, if it becomes very difficult, in that it becomes
virtually impossible to wear the niqab (even with a cap, etc), and you
fear harm onto yourself, then in such a case you will be excused in
leaving the face exposed, but try to keep the face away from
non-Mahram men whenever reasonably possible.
And Allah knows best
Is it necessary for a woman to cover her face during Ihram (during
Umrah/Hajj)? Will she be excused for not covering her face due to the
difficulties associated with niqabs hanging from baseball caps?
Insha'Allah as soon as my state of Ihram is complete, I would wear the
Niqab but what about during the days of ihram?
Answer:
In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,
The ruling in the Hanafi Madhhab (and even in other madhhabs) is that,
although the face is not considered to be part of one�s nakedness
(awra), it is necessary to cover it, due to the fitna involved in not
doing so. This is the transmitted position in the Hanafi School, as
mentioned in virtually all the major fiqh books.
Some contemporary scholars have a more lenient approach to this issue,
especially in the West. However, my understanding is (according to
what I have learnt from my teachers) that a woman is required to cover
her face even in the west except in dire situations.
As such, if you are travelling for Hajj, and you normally cover your
face at home, then you must cover it whilst in the state of Ihram
also. However, if it becomes very difficult, in that it becomes
virtually impossible to wear the niqab (even with a cap, etc), and you
fear harm onto yourself, then in such a case you will be excused in
leaving the face exposed, but try to keep the face away from
non-Mahram men whenever reasonably possible.
And Allah knows best
Fathwa, - Hajj and Menstruation
Question:
1.If a woman and her husband are planning on making Hajj next year but
the woman is sure that she may get her period during the time of Hajj
what are the alternatives she can consider that wouldn't be haram? For
example is she allowed to take some medication that postpones her
menstrual cycle, or does she just attend Hajj hoping that she
calculated her cycle wrong?
Answer:
Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,
1. The problem that normally arises in Hajj with menstruation relates
to the Obligatory Tawaf (tawaf al-rukn/al-ziyara).
This is because this Obligatory Tawaf has four conditions:
1) Intention
It is sufficient to simply intend performing tawaf, though it is best
to specify the intention of the Obligatory Tawaf�this also avoids the
difference of opinion of the Hanbalis. [Kasani, Bada�i` al-Sana�i`,
2.128; Ibn Qudama, al-Mughni, 3.441]
2. To perform the Tawaf around the Kaaba from within the Masjid al-Haram.
3) That the Obligatory Tawaf occur after:
i) entering into a state of ihram;
ii) standing at `Arafa
4) That it be performed in its specified time.
� This time starts from Fajr time on the 10th day of Dhu�l Hijja (yawm al-nahr).
� It is not valid before this.
o It is best to perform it on the very first day (the 10th), after the
Throwing (ramy) and Trimming of one�s hair.
� There is no end time for this Obligatory Tawaf.
� However, it is necessary (wajib) to perform during the Days of
Slaughtering (10th to 12th of Dhu�l Hijja), if one has the capacity
and ability to do so.
o Delaying it beyond this without excuse (such as menstruation)
requires expiative slaughter, but it must still be performed in order
to fulfill the obligation and to fully leave one�s state of Ihram.
o The one who did not have the capacity or ability to perform the
Obligatory Tawaf within this necessary time is not sinful, but it
remains obligatory for them to perform it. [Marghinani, al-Hidaya,
2.180; Ibn Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar, 2.250]
One should plan one's Hajj in a way that does allows one to perform
this Obligatory Tawaf:
� Normally, this would entail performing it within its specified
necessary time (between the 10th and 12th of Dhu�l Hijja).
� When one is not able to do so, such as when menstruating, it is
obligatory to perform this tawaf after these days.
Thus, one should either:
a) Make travel arrangements such that one has enough time to be able
to perform the Obligatory Tawaf if one is menstruating during those
days; or
b) To take the medical means to delay one�s period�in order to fulfill
the obligation.
Such medical means are permitted, though normally better to avoid. See:
Would it be permissible to take birth control to stop her
menstruation in order to avoid menstruation during Hajj?
And Allah alone gives success.
1.If a woman and her husband are planning on making Hajj next year but
the woman is sure that she may get her period during the time of Hajj
what are the alternatives she can consider that wouldn't be haram? For
example is she allowed to take some medication that postpones her
menstrual cycle, or does she just attend Hajj hoping that she
calculated her cycle wrong?
Answer:
Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah,
1. The problem that normally arises in Hajj with menstruation relates
to the Obligatory Tawaf (tawaf al-rukn/al-ziyara).
This is because this Obligatory Tawaf has four conditions:
1) Intention
It is sufficient to simply intend performing tawaf, though it is best
to specify the intention of the Obligatory Tawaf�this also avoids the
difference of opinion of the Hanbalis. [Kasani, Bada�i` al-Sana�i`,
2.128; Ibn Qudama, al-Mughni, 3.441]
2. To perform the Tawaf around the Kaaba from within the Masjid al-Haram.
3) That the Obligatory Tawaf occur after:
i) entering into a state of ihram;
ii) standing at `Arafa
4) That it be performed in its specified time.
� This time starts from Fajr time on the 10th day of Dhu�l Hijja (yawm al-nahr).
� It is not valid before this.
o It is best to perform it on the very first day (the 10th), after the
Throwing (ramy) and Trimming of one�s hair.
� There is no end time for this Obligatory Tawaf.
� However, it is necessary (wajib) to perform during the Days of
Slaughtering (10th to 12th of Dhu�l Hijja), if one has the capacity
and ability to do so.
o Delaying it beyond this without excuse (such as menstruation)
requires expiative slaughter, but it must still be performed in order
to fulfill the obligation and to fully leave one�s state of Ihram.
o The one who did not have the capacity or ability to perform the
Obligatory Tawaf within this necessary time is not sinful, but it
remains obligatory for them to perform it. [Marghinani, al-Hidaya,
2.180; Ibn Abidin, Radd al-Muhtar, 2.250]
One should plan one's Hajj in a way that does allows one to perform
this Obligatory Tawaf:
� Normally, this would entail performing it within its specified
necessary time (between the 10th and 12th of Dhu�l Hijja).
� When one is not able to do so, such as when menstruating, it is
obligatory to perform this tawaf after these days.
Thus, one should either:
a) Make travel arrangements such that one has enough time to be able
to perform the Obligatory Tawaf if one is menstruating during those
days; or
b) To take the medical means to delay one�s period�in order to fulfill
the obligation.
Such medical means are permitted, though normally better to avoid. See:
Would it be permissible to take birth control to stop her
menstruation in order to avoid menstruation during Hajj?
And Allah alone gives success.
Fathwa, - I am impatient and awaiting to perform umrah.
Question:
I am currently a 19-year old girl, and compared to many people still
very young. For 2 years now I have been waiting to go to Saudi Arabia
and wanting to perform umrah.
But I have not been able to. I was born a Muslim and a follow Islam
from my own heart. However, I am currently a practicing Muslim and
have been praying namaz everyday for 2 years now. I started wearing
the hijaab 1 year ago.
I have not had a great upbringing and I have not always been perfect.
However, each and everyday when I make duaa, I pray I go to do umrah.
I am now financially stable, and I have not committed any sins and I
believe I am the best I can be at this moment of this life as a
Muslim.
A question that approaches my mind is I ask to be called to Makkah but
have not yet been. Many keep saying you will be called when it is your
time, but I have never wanted anything more. I was meant to come with
someone but he won't take me as he only wants to take his own wife and
child.
Every time I think about umrah I start crying. I had my hopes up and
thought I would go this Ramadan. I currently have no mehram and so no
plans.
I don't know what to do, because I keep getting upset and thinking if
I am being a good Muslim why is my duaa to come to Makkah not being
fulfilled. I do not know if I am being selfish and asking for this.
But I do not know what to do or who to talk to. I find it hard to talk
to family members about this, as I don't think anyone understands me.
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah. May Allah's peace and blessings bestow upon our
beloved Prophet, his family, and companions.
Dear Sister,
I pray this finds you in good health and spirits.
I completely sympathize with your desire to visit the House of Allah.
My advice to you about dua is to remember the following:
Dua or supplication is a very powerful means of communicating your
needs and desires to Allah Most High. Don't despair that your prayers
haven't been answered. We cannot guarantee the outcome of our prayers.
Rather, we pray sincerely, take the necessary steps to achieve our
goals, and leave the rest to Allah.
If He has decreed that you will visit His House, then nothing can
prevent you from going. Likewise, if He has decreed that you will not
make umrah, no earthly power can change this.
One of the most important aspects of iman is being contented with
Allah's qadr, or divine decree. If you are not able to make umrah,
then you will not be held responsible. It's important to have the
intention to do umrah because, as the Prophet (peace be upon him)
said, "Actions are according to intentions."
As a young woman, you have to consider the practical aspects of
traveling. The general consensus of the four Sunni schools of law is
that it is impermissible for a woman to undertake a long journey
without a husband or mahram. The Shafi'i and Maliki Schools do allow a
special dispensation for a woman who performs an obligatory hajj (her
first hajj) with a group of upright people.
Umrah is not obligatory for Hanafis, but is an emphasized Sunna. If I
may suggest, it may be better to focus your energies on Hajj. A lot of
people put off Hajj, thinking they'll make it when they're older. The
only problem is they've accumulated so much debt by that time that
they still can't go!
Don't lose hope. You're still young. Focus your energies on
establishing your deen, learning about your religion, and bringing
your life into accord with what the Prophet (peace be upon him) gave
us. Allah willing, this will open up the doors of tawfiq, or true
success.
Allah Most High hears your prayers. He responds in many different ways.
I'm including some links from SunniPath that address the issues of dua
and women's travel:
"Can my aunty's husband (mother's brother in-law) be my mehram?"
http://qa.sunnipath.com /issue_view.asp?HD=1& ID=6485&CATE=143
"The Etiquette of Du'a"
http://qa.sunnipath.com /issue_view.asp?HD=1& ID=2580&CATE=31
"The Prayer of Need (Salat al-Hajah)"
http://www.sunnipath.c om/resources/Questions /qa00001118.aspx
May Allah facilitate your visit to His House, whether it's with a good
husband or a group of trustworthy people.
And Allah knows best.
I am currently a 19-year old girl, and compared to many people still
very young. For 2 years now I have been waiting to go to Saudi Arabia
and wanting to perform umrah.
But I have not been able to. I was born a Muslim and a follow Islam
from my own heart. However, I am currently a practicing Muslim and
have been praying namaz everyday for 2 years now. I started wearing
the hijaab 1 year ago.
I have not had a great upbringing and I have not always been perfect.
However, each and everyday when I make duaa, I pray I go to do umrah.
I am now financially stable, and I have not committed any sins and I
believe I am the best I can be at this moment of this life as a
Muslim.
A question that approaches my mind is I ask to be called to Makkah but
have not yet been. Many keep saying you will be called when it is your
time, but I have never wanted anything more. I was meant to come with
someone but he won't take me as he only wants to take his own wife and
child.
Every time I think about umrah I start crying. I had my hopes up and
thought I would go this Ramadan. I currently have no mehram and so no
plans.
I don't know what to do, because I keep getting upset and thinking if
I am being a good Muslim why is my duaa to come to Makkah not being
fulfilled. I do not know if I am being selfish and asking for this.
But I do not know what to do or who to talk to. I find it hard to talk
to family members about this, as I don't think anyone understands me.
Answer:
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
Praise be to Allah. May Allah's peace and blessings bestow upon our
beloved Prophet, his family, and companions.
Dear Sister,
I pray this finds you in good health and spirits.
I completely sympathize with your desire to visit the House of Allah.
My advice to you about dua is to remember the following:
Dua or supplication is a very powerful means of communicating your
needs and desires to Allah Most High. Don't despair that your prayers
haven't been answered. We cannot guarantee the outcome of our prayers.
Rather, we pray sincerely, take the necessary steps to achieve our
goals, and leave the rest to Allah.
If He has decreed that you will visit His House, then nothing can
prevent you from going. Likewise, if He has decreed that you will not
make umrah, no earthly power can change this.
One of the most important aspects of iman is being contented with
Allah's qadr, or divine decree. If you are not able to make umrah,
then you will not be held responsible. It's important to have the
intention to do umrah because, as the Prophet (peace be upon him)
said, "Actions are according to intentions."
As a young woman, you have to consider the practical aspects of
traveling. The general consensus of the four Sunni schools of law is
that it is impermissible for a woman to undertake a long journey
without a husband or mahram. The Shafi'i and Maliki Schools do allow a
special dispensation for a woman who performs an obligatory hajj (her
first hajj) with a group of upright people.
Umrah is not obligatory for Hanafis, but is an emphasized Sunna. If I
may suggest, it may be better to focus your energies on Hajj. A lot of
people put off Hajj, thinking they'll make it when they're older. The
only problem is they've accumulated so much debt by that time that
they still can't go!
Don't lose hope. You're still young. Focus your energies on
establishing your deen, learning about your religion, and bringing
your life into accord with what the Prophet (peace be upon him) gave
us. Allah willing, this will open up the doors of tawfiq, or true
success.
Allah Most High hears your prayers. He responds in many different ways.
I'm including some links from SunniPath that address the issues of dua
and women's travel:
"Can my aunty's husband (mother's brother in-law) be my mehram?"
http://qa.sunnipath.com /issue_view.asp?HD=1& ID=6485&CATE=143
"The Etiquette of Du'a"
http://qa.sunnipath.com /issue_view.asp?HD=1& ID=2580&CATE=31
"The Prayer of Need (Salat al-Hajah)"
http://www.sunnipath.c om/resources/Questions /qa00001118.aspx
May Allah facilitate your visit to His House, whether it's with a good
husband or a group of trustworthy people.
And Allah knows best.
Kids listen to our every deed
How many times have you told your kids to change their clothes/brush
their teeth/do their homework/or anything else for that matter? There
is really no right answer because there is really no limit to the
number of times we have to ask our kids to do something.
For most of us, this is a normal part of our daily lives. We ask, and
ask, and ask, and if we are lucky, our kids cooperate after the fourth
request or after a loud but otherwise harmless scolding. We complain
that our kids never listen to us; we ask other moms how they get their
kids to behave, eat their vegetables, or go to sleep. We consult books
and Internet sites at all hours on better childrearing and discipline
and other parenting techniques. And still, our kids just don't listen.
But, they do observe. While we are yelling at them, they are watching
us; while we argue with our husbands, they are watching; while we
mutter curses under our breath at raging drivers, they are watching;
and while we chat with our friends on the phone, they are watching us.
If you have toddlers, you are beginning to see this already. You see
them carrying on animated conversations on their battery operated toy
cell phones. They pace around the house with their heads cocked, their
little shoulders straining to hold up the fake phone with the blinking
lights. Yup, our kids are watching our every move, even when they
don't listen to one word.
The lessons they learn
The truth is that we shouldn't worry that our children never listen to
us. Instead we should worry that they are always watching us. It is
true. When we tell our kids to pick up their toys, they don't listen.
We raise our voices, and they still ignore us. Then, we become irate
and yell, and they have a temper tantrum or break down into a fit of
tears. But not before they have taken careful note of our actions. In
fact, every time we "tell" our kids to do something, we are teaching
them a lesson. We are telling them to do one thing, but we are really
showing them how to do something else. When we yell at them in anger,
we are showing them how to get someone to listen to us. When we throw
toys into the toy box or kick toys out of the way as we point our
fingers, we are showing them how to display their anger.
And think about when you are driving your kids to school in the
morning. A hurried driver cuts you off and you swerve to avoid getting
side swiped. "Moron!" you yell, as you correct the wheel. You shrug it
off and silently thank Allaah that nothing happened. Your kids in the
back saw what happened. In these situations, we rarely explain to our
kids that the other driver made a mistake by changing lanes without
signaling or by turning right just as we crossed a green light.
Instead, we show them how to handle such situations: curse and
complain.
The lessons we want to teach
It is almost impossible to handle every situation of every day in a
manner befitting for teaching our kids lessons. But if we are aware of
the opportunities )and the impending dangers( of such situations, we
can at least make the most out of as many situations as possible. For
example, we know that disciplining our kids is one of the most
challenging aspects of each day. And, during the course of a day's
worth of disciplining, we find ourselves yelling, getting angry,
scolding, and then usually seeking some sort of repentance for angry
words or sentiments. If we could only see ourselves the way our kids
probably do, we might learn a thing or two.
Well, obviously, we can't see ourselves and we can rarely stop
ourselves in the midst of heat and anger, but we can prepare ourselves
for these moments. If we can decide ahead of time what we want to
teach our kids, we can create a sort of game plan for situations. For
example, we want our kids to learn that they don't have to yell to be
heard. So, the next time you ask your son to pick up his puzzle pieces
and get ready for dinner, brace yourself. If you want him to
understand that he needs to listen to you and comply, then figure out
a way to get him to hear you. Ask him to look at you or get down on
your hands and knees and start showing him how to pick up the pieces
and put them in the box. Do anything but don't yell or scream.
The lessons we learn
If we make a conscious effort to remember that our children are
watching us, it will keep us in check. We will mind our manners, we
will speak more soothingly, we will control our emotions, and
ultimately we will see that, by our kids watching us, we are beginning
to behave the way we want them to behave. In other words, it is a
cycle that eventually trains parents and their children towards better
behavior and emotional restraint. If we know that our kids are
watching our every move, we will be mindful of our behavior and set an
example with that behavior. Then, our kids will model that good
behavior and essentially everyone wins.
Making promises is one of the issues that cause sticky situations for
parents trying to model good behavior. Parents, from all parts of the
world, have their own way of making, keeping and breaking promises. It
is easy to make promises, and it is even easier to break them. Many
times parents make promises on a whim and later find out that they
didn't or couldn't keep to their word. Sometimes, they even forget
altogether that they ever made the promise. How many times have you
told your child, "Yes, yes, Inshaa'allaah )Allaah willing(, I'll get
you that_____]fill in your own word[ soon," just to keep your child
quiet? The moment the words leave your lips, you should consider that
promise cast in stone. A child promised a coveted prize/toy/trip will
never forget that promise and will never let you forget it. Actually,
quite sadly, many children roll their eyes when they hear their
parents say "Inshaa'allaah" for fear that Inshaa'allaah really means
"maybe" or "yeah, right" or a plain "no."
Much of our behavior depends on our intentions. If you really mean to
get that toy for your son, then assure him that you will. If you don't
plan on buying it, then be honest. A dishonest promise might grant you
a few minutes of quiet shopping time, but in the end it will lead you
further into the depths of your child's distrust. Leading children on
with false promises is a guaranteed way to display behavior that your
children will never forget and will probably mimic in their own
adulthood.
In essence, we are designing our children's futures by our own
behavior. Why perpetuate behavior in our children that we ourselves
should not be harboring? Keeping in mind that our children are not
only watching us but learning from us should be reason enough for us
to change our behavior before it is cast in the stone of generations
to come.
their teeth/do their homework/or anything else for that matter? There
is really no right answer because there is really no limit to the
number of times we have to ask our kids to do something.
For most of us, this is a normal part of our daily lives. We ask, and
ask, and ask, and if we are lucky, our kids cooperate after the fourth
request or after a loud but otherwise harmless scolding. We complain
that our kids never listen to us; we ask other moms how they get their
kids to behave, eat their vegetables, or go to sleep. We consult books
and Internet sites at all hours on better childrearing and discipline
and other parenting techniques. And still, our kids just don't listen.
But, they do observe. While we are yelling at them, they are watching
us; while we argue with our husbands, they are watching; while we
mutter curses under our breath at raging drivers, they are watching;
and while we chat with our friends on the phone, they are watching us.
If you have toddlers, you are beginning to see this already. You see
them carrying on animated conversations on their battery operated toy
cell phones. They pace around the house with their heads cocked, their
little shoulders straining to hold up the fake phone with the blinking
lights. Yup, our kids are watching our every move, even when they
don't listen to one word.
The lessons they learn
The truth is that we shouldn't worry that our children never listen to
us. Instead we should worry that they are always watching us. It is
true. When we tell our kids to pick up their toys, they don't listen.
We raise our voices, and they still ignore us. Then, we become irate
and yell, and they have a temper tantrum or break down into a fit of
tears. But not before they have taken careful note of our actions. In
fact, every time we "tell" our kids to do something, we are teaching
them a lesson. We are telling them to do one thing, but we are really
showing them how to do something else. When we yell at them in anger,
we are showing them how to get someone to listen to us. When we throw
toys into the toy box or kick toys out of the way as we point our
fingers, we are showing them how to display their anger.
And think about when you are driving your kids to school in the
morning. A hurried driver cuts you off and you swerve to avoid getting
side swiped. "Moron!" you yell, as you correct the wheel. You shrug it
off and silently thank Allaah that nothing happened. Your kids in the
back saw what happened. In these situations, we rarely explain to our
kids that the other driver made a mistake by changing lanes without
signaling or by turning right just as we crossed a green light.
Instead, we show them how to handle such situations: curse and
complain.
The lessons we want to teach
It is almost impossible to handle every situation of every day in a
manner befitting for teaching our kids lessons. But if we are aware of
the opportunities )and the impending dangers( of such situations, we
can at least make the most out of as many situations as possible. For
example, we know that disciplining our kids is one of the most
challenging aspects of each day. And, during the course of a day's
worth of disciplining, we find ourselves yelling, getting angry,
scolding, and then usually seeking some sort of repentance for angry
words or sentiments. If we could only see ourselves the way our kids
probably do, we might learn a thing or two.
Well, obviously, we can't see ourselves and we can rarely stop
ourselves in the midst of heat and anger, but we can prepare ourselves
for these moments. If we can decide ahead of time what we want to
teach our kids, we can create a sort of game plan for situations. For
example, we want our kids to learn that they don't have to yell to be
heard. So, the next time you ask your son to pick up his puzzle pieces
and get ready for dinner, brace yourself. If you want him to
understand that he needs to listen to you and comply, then figure out
a way to get him to hear you. Ask him to look at you or get down on
your hands and knees and start showing him how to pick up the pieces
and put them in the box. Do anything but don't yell or scream.
The lessons we learn
If we make a conscious effort to remember that our children are
watching us, it will keep us in check. We will mind our manners, we
will speak more soothingly, we will control our emotions, and
ultimately we will see that, by our kids watching us, we are beginning
to behave the way we want them to behave. In other words, it is a
cycle that eventually trains parents and their children towards better
behavior and emotional restraint. If we know that our kids are
watching our every move, we will be mindful of our behavior and set an
example with that behavior. Then, our kids will model that good
behavior and essentially everyone wins.
Making promises is one of the issues that cause sticky situations for
parents trying to model good behavior. Parents, from all parts of the
world, have their own way of making, keeping and breaking promises. It
is easy to make promises, and it is even easier to break them. Many
times parents make promises on a whim and later find out that they
didn't or couldn't keep to their word. Sometimes, they even forget
altogether that they ever made the promise. How many times have you
told your child, "Yes, yes, Inshaa'allaah )Allaah willing(, I'll get
you that_____]fill in your own word[ soon," just to keep your child
quiet? The moment the words leave your lips, you should consider that
promise cast in stone. A child promised a coveted prize/toy/trip will
never forget that promise and will never let you forget it. Actually,
quite sadly, many children roll their eyes when they hear their
parents say "Inshaa'allaah" for fear that Inshaa'allaah really means
"maybe" or "yeah, right" or a plain "no."
Much of our behavior depends on our intentions. If you really mean to
get that toy for your son, then assure him that you will. If you don't
plan on buying it, then be honest. A dishonest promise might grant you
a few minutes of quiet shopping time, but in the end it will lead you
further into the depths of your child's distrust. Leading children on
with false promises is a guaranteed way to display behavior that your
children will never forget and will probably mimic in their own
adulthood.
In essence, we are designing our children's futures by our own
behavior. Why perpetuate behavior in our children that we ourselves
should not be harboring? Keeping in mind that our children are not
only watching us but learning from us should be reason enough for us
to change our behavior before it is cast in the stone of generations
to come.
Parents: Precious Blessings in our Life
Allaah The Almighty has made our parents the means of giving us life
and made them the source of providing us with unparalleled love and a
sound upbringing. However, when we grow up, we tend to forget the
period of our infancy and childhood and disregard their efforts. What
ingratitude can be worse than this?
The very least we can do for our parents is to show goodness and kind
treatment towards them while they are alive, and supplicate for them,
offer charity and other righteous deeds on their behalf after their
death.
Allaah The Almighty mentions the virtues of being good to one's
parents in conjunction with worshipping Him alone when He Says )what
means(:}"And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And
that you are dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them
attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor
shout at them but address them in terms of honour.And lower unto them
the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Lord!
Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was
young.'"{]Quran, 17: 23-24[.
The Prophetclassified being undutiful to parents as one of the great
major sins and mentioned it along with associating partners with
Allaah The Almighty in His worship. Hesaid:"Shall I not inform you
about the most grievous of the grave sins?"His Companions
replied,"Indeed, O Messenger of Allaah!"Hesaid:"Associating anything
with Allaah )in worship(, and being undutiful to parents, )he was
reclining at that time, then he sat up and said(: )beware of( false
testimony or false utterance."He repeated it so many times that his
Companions wished that he would become silent. ]Al-Bukhaari and
Muslim[.
A man came to the Prophetand asked,"Which of the people is most
deserving of my good companionship?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."The
man asked,"Who is next?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."The man then
asked,"Who is next?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."Then the man
asked,"Who is next?"The Prophetreplied:"It is your
father."]Al-Bukhaari[.
Abu Hurayrahnarrated that the Prophetsaid:"Let him be humiliated! Let
him be humiliated! Let him be humiliated!"It was asked,"Who, O
Messenger of Allaah?"Hereplied:"He whose parents reach old age, either
one or both of them, and who does not enter Paradise )due to not being
dutiful to them(."]Muslim[
Dutifulness to parents is one of the reasons behind the forgiveness of
sins. Ibn 'Umarboth, said that a man came to the Prophetand said,"I
have committed a great sin, can I repent from it?"The Prophetasked:"Is
your mother alive?"and in another narration he asked:"Are you parents
alive?"The man replied,"No"so the Prophetasked:"Do you have a maternal
aunt?"The man replied,"Yes"Thereupon, the Prophetsaid:"Then be dutiful
to her."]At-Tirmithi[.
'Ali ibn Abi Taalibsaid,"If there was anything less than this
expression )i.e., saying 'Uff' to one's parents( as a form of being
undutiful, Allaah would have forbidden that expression."Allaah The
Almighty also mentions gratefulness to Him along with being grateful
to one's parents when He says )what means(:"Give thanks to Me and to
your parents. Unto Me is the final destination."]Quran, 31: 14[
These narrations inspire you to be dutiful to your parents and respect
and glorify them. Do not be negligent of the saying of the
Prophet:"The pleasure of the Lord is in pleasing your parents, and the
wrath of the Lord )upon the child( is if he makes them
angry."]At-Tabaraani[.
and made them the source of providing us with unparalleled love and a
sound upbringing. However, when we grow up, we tend to forget the
period of our infancy and childhood and disregard their efforts. What
ingratitude can be worse than this?
The very least we can do for our parents is to show goodness and kind
treatment towards them while they are alive, and supplicate for them,
offer charity and other righteous deeds on their behalf after their
death.
Allaah The Almighty mentions the virtues of being good to one's
parents in conjunction with worshipping Him alone when He Says )what
means(:}"And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And
that you are dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them
attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor
shout at them but address them in terms of honour.And lower unto them
the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: `My Lord!
Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was
young.'"{]Quran, 17: 23-24[.
The Prophetclassified being undutiful to parents as one of the great
major sins and mentioned it along with associating partners with
Allaah The Almighty in His worship. Hesaid:"Shall I not inform you
about the most grievous of the grave sins?"His Companions
replied,"Indeed, O Messenger of Allaah!"Hesaid:"Associating anything
with Allaah )in worship(, and being undutiful to parents, )he was
reclining at that time, then he sat up and said(: )beware of( false
testimony or false utterance."He repeated it so many times that his
Companions wished that he would become silent. ]Al-Bukhaari and
Muslim[.
A man came to the Prophetand asked,"Which of the people is most
deserving of my good companionship?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."The
man asked,"Who is next?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."The man then
asked,"Who is next?"Hereplied:"It is your mother."Then the man
asked,"Who is next?"The Prophetreplied:"It is your
father."]Al-Bukhaari[.
Abu Hurayrahnarrated that the Prophetsaid:"Let him be humiliated! Let
him be humiliated! Let him be humiliated!"It was asked,"Who, O
Messenger of Allaah?"Hereplied:"He whose parents reach old age, either
one or both of them, and who does not enter Paradise )due to not being
dutiful to them(."]Muslim[
Dutifulness to parents is one of the reasons behind the forgiveness of
sins. Ibn 'Umarboth, said that a man came to the Prophetand said,"I
have committed a great sin, can I repent from it?"The Prophetasked:"Is
your mother alive?"and in another narration he asked:"Are you parents
alive?"The man replied,"No"so the Prophetasked:"Do you have a maternal
aunt?"The man replied,"Yes"Thereupon, the Prophetsaid:"Then be dutiful
to her."]At-Tirmithi[.
'Ali ibn Abi Taalibsaid,"If there was anything less than this
expression )i.e., saying 'Uff' to one's parents( as a form of being
undutiful, Allaah would have forbidden that expression."Allaah The
Almighty also mentions gratefulness to Him along with being grateful
to one's parents when He says )what means(:"Give thanks to Me and to
your parents. Unto Me is the final destination."]Quran, 31: 14[
These narrations inspire you to be dutiful to your parents and respect
and glorify them. Do not be negligent of the saying of the
Prophet:"The pleasure of the Lord is in pleasing your parents, and the
wrath of the Lord )upon the child( is if he makes them
angry."]At-Tabaraani[.
Showing respect for customs and traditions
Man is born without any experience and then is influenced by the
customs and traditions from those around him. In this way, customs and
traditions are conveyed from one generation to the next.
Customs and traditions appear in the actions and works practiced by
individuals that is oft-repeated and represents a daily or cyclic
program for their life.
Customs are actions that are a norm for people to do and are repeated
on many different occasions. Traditions involve a new generation
copying the methods of the previous generation and imitating it in
different affairs.
Emergence and Development of Customs and Traditions:
It is difficult to determine the emergence, development and expansion
of customs and traditions because they are parts of the social
activity of individuals in any random sector of society. They do not
appear all of a sudden. On the contrary, it takes years until they
become well-established and even many more years until they change or
evolve.
Customs and traditions often emerge to serve a social function
benefiting all or some individuals in the society. It becomes a social
pattern that helps strengthen social relations among the individuals
of a community. This leads to a collective agreement upon certain
behaviors to be practiced in the community.
Customs and traditions act as a chain whose links are conveyed from
one generation to the next. This conveyance may be accompanied by some
changes through omissions or additions, being positive or negative, in
accordance with the conditions and values of every generation.
Moreover, the social function of the customs or traditions may fade or
even expire as a result of the change of social conditions. But they
survive due to psychological pressure on the individuals who repeat
them and feel that they grant them safety and reassurance and
guarantee their consistency against any new changes.
Women have an important and effective role in spreading customs and
traditions and conveying them from one generation to the next. This
stems from the theory of their great role in disciplining and
maintaining )the family(. For this reason, she bears the greatest
responsibility for adjusting them in accordance with the right Islamic
method. In confirmation of that Allah The Almighty Says )what means(:
•}And, ]moreover[, this is My path, which is straight, so follow it;
and do not follow ]other[ ways, for you will be separated from His
way. This has He instructed you that you may become righteous.{]Quran
6:153[
•}It is not for a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and
His Messenger have decided a matter, that they should ]thereafter[
have any choice about their affair. And whoever disobeys Allah and His
Messenger has certainly strayed into clear error.{]Quran 33:36[
The Relationship of the Islamic method with Customs and Traditions:
With the spread of Islam to many countries that each have their own
different customs and traditions, the Islamic method takes three forms
in relation with them:
The first is to support the customs that encourage virtuous principles
and high values and enhancing them according to the eternal Shari'ah
principles. Among these are the neighbor's right, generously hosting
the guest, helping the poor, relieving the needy and assisting the
stranger.
The second is to straighten the customs which have two aspects: one
good and the other bad, by placing emphasis on the good, forbidding
the bad and reforming it according to the Noble Shari'ah.
The third is to resist the straying and misleading customs and
traditions, which oppose its values and principles, and may lead to
gaps in society, disorder of values, the spread of corruption and vice
and the loss of security and tranquility. An example of this is the
practice of girls being buried alive. The Arabs )during the
pre-Islamic days( regarded having a girl as a source of pessimism and
an object of contempt. Then the Quran disapproved of this hideous
custom and protected the girl from this criminal act. He The Almighty
Says )what means(:}And when one of them is informed of ]the birth of[
a female, his face becomes dark, and he suppresses grief. He hides
himself from the people because of the ill of which he has been
informed. Should he keep it in humiliation or bury it in the ground?
Unquestionably, evil is what they decide.{]Quran 16:58-59[
And, the Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"He,
who has a female )daughter( and he does not bury her alive, disgrace
her nor give preference to his male child over her, Allah will Admit
him into Paradise."]Abu Daawood[
Before Islam, the young girl would also suffer from being coerced into
marriage regardless of her will and consent. Thereupon, Islam
glorified her in this respect when the Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu
'alayhi wa sallam, said:"No previously married woman should be given
in marriage without her consent and no virgin should be given in
marriage without her permission."]Muslim[ Before Islam, the young girl
also suffered being deprived of any inheritance. But Islam assigned to
her a right in the inheritance of her father. Allah The Almighty Says
)what means(:}For men is a share of what the parents and close
relatives leave, and for women is a share of what the parents and
close relatives leave, be it little or much - an obligatory
share.{]Quran 4:7[
Bad Customs:
These days, many bad customs have become widespread among the general
population and it is even more widely spread among women. Among these
customs is the intention of seeking to draw closer to Allah The
Almighty using the dead and Awliyaa' )Pious people who are close to
Allah The Almighty( as a medium. Wailing and screaming upon the death
)of a loved one(. Similar bad customs include visiting psychics and
fortune tellers and following their errors, attachment to amulets,
talismans and charms assuming they bring good and avert evil. Also,
Mushaaharah or Kabsah, which is the belief that if a man with a shaved
head carrying meat, red dates, eggplants or similar items enters upon
a confined woman, he would cause the milk to cease to flow )from her
breast( or delay her pregnancy. And, these are examples of bad customs
that do not please Allah The Almighty and His Messenger, sallAllahu
'alayhi wa sallam, like putting on toupees, visiting coiffeurs,
lengthening finger and toe nails, using dyes and colors to adorn them,
lagging behind the latest fashions of clothing )gothic and other
styles that stick out from the norm(, and so on.
The Duty of the Muslim:
To avoid the potential harms of these matters and prevent corruption
due to them, it is the duty of the Muslim to abandon every custom and
tradition that violates even a single principle of the religious
fundamental principles. He must pause to reflect upon all customs and
traditions and weigh them using the balance of the genuine Islamic
method and adjust whatever does not agree with it or comply with its
rules. If there is a custom or tradition that violates one's creed and
opposes one's religion, he should throw it far away without
hesitation, bashfulness or regret. He should flee from bad customs and
evil traditions and rush toward the secure shadows of Islam
entertaining no fear of critics for the Sake of Allah. His pattern
should follow that of the righteous believers in the ages of Islam who
responded to the call of truth and sacrificed what was valuable to
them in support of it.
Fabricating History:
Some historians fabricated this eternal image of the great men and
leaders of this Ummah. They presented the Muslim caliphs in a light of
men whose main concern was only food and drink, to the extent that it
is attributed to Mu'aawiyah ibn Abi Sufyaan, the Companion of the
Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, that he would eat
very compulsively. This is something unimaginable even from cattle,
let alone from a revered Companion who learnt in the school of the
Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, that a man should
not eat and drink in excess. They also represent to us such a caliph
as Haaroon Ar-Rasheed, as a man who loved women and drank alcoholic
drinks, and so on. All this is attributed to a man who, in his age,
witnessed many conquests, was himself a Mujaahid )one who strives with
his wealth and life in the Path of Allah, The Almighty(, a devout
worshipper of Allah, pious and righteous.
It is obvious from the biographies of such personalities that what has
been said about them are no more than invented lies whose initiatory
purpose is to distort the image of Islam through the character
assassination of its caliphs. As a result, they attempt to claim that
their customs and traditions appear to be in opposition to the innate
human common sense so that the Ummah would criticize its symbols and
celebratory figures. Afterwards, they would have nothing worthy of
mentioning for themselves in the history of mankind. Resentful
criminal historians distorted not only the image of men, but the
believing women as well. During the pre-Islamic days, they would let
their head covers hang down from behind their heads, uncovering their
breasts, necks and collars.
With the emergence of Islam and its spreading light, Allah The
Almighty Says, addressing the women by way of disciplining )what
means(:}and to wrap ]a portion of[ their headcovers over their
chests.{]Quran 24:31[. Upon which, the men turned to their wives to
recite to them what had been revealed by Allah The Almighty in order
to guide them and there was no woman but that she caught hold of her
sheet )of wool( and covered her head )and face( with trust and belief
in the clear Verses revealed by Allah The Almighty. In the morning,
they performed the morning prayer behind the Messenger of Allah,
sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, with their heads covered and motionless,
as if there were crows perched on their heads. ]Abu Daawood and Ibn
Abi Haatim[. But the people represented their behavior as retardation
and not in harmony with the advanced time. Rather, they had their
women come out half-dressed as if they were nude, in order that the
dissolute wolves )amongst men( would quench their craving by the
unlawful glance, and whatever consequent traces of her body he may
recall.
Inherited customs and traditions are among the affairs that are the
most detrimental upon the religion of Allah The Almighty because they
are habitual, the soul inclines to them, the people agree with them
and it is difficult to abandon them. From this point of view, it is
incumbent upon the Muslim to discard anything that opposes the Islamic
Sharee'ah and play an effective role in changing and virtuously
protecting his community in order that its customs and traditions
would be compatible with the Sharee'ah of Allah The Almighty. Men and
women are equal in this respect, perchance the children would rise as
a strong generation, carrying the torch of Islam, and enlightening the
way for all people.
customs and traditions from those around him. In this way, customs and
traditions are conveyed from one generation to the next.
Customs and traditions appear in the actions and works practiced by
individuals that is oft-repeated and represents a daily or cyclic
program for their life.
Customs are actions that are a norm for people to do and are repeated
on many different occasions. Traditions involve a new generation
copying the methods of the previous generation and imitating it in
different affairs.
Emergence and Development of Customs and Traditions:
It is difficult to determine the emergence, development and expansion
of customs and traditions because they are parts of the social
activity of individuals in any random sector of society. They do not
appear all of a sudden. On the contrary, it takes years until they
become well-established and even many more years until they change or
evolve.
Customs and traditions often emerge to serve a social function
benefiting all or some individuals in the society. It becomes a social
pattern that helps strengthen social relations among the individuals
of a community. This leads to a collective agreement upon certain
behaviors to be practiced in the community.
Customs and traditions act as a chain whose links are conveyed from
one generation to the next. This conveyance may be accompanied by some
changes through omissions or additions, being positive or negative, in
accordance with the conditions and values of every generation.
Moreover, the social function of the customs or traditions may fade or
even expire as a result of the change of social conditions. But they
survive due to psychological pressure on the individuals who repeat
them and feel that they grant them safety and reassurance and
guarantee their consistency against any new changes.
Women have an important and effective role in spreading customs and
traditions and conveying them from one generation to the next. This
stems from the theory of their great role in disciplining and
maintaining )the family(. For this reason, she bears the greatest
responsibility for adjusting them in accordance with the right Islamic
method. In confirmation of that Allah The Almighty Says )what means(:
•}And, ]moreover[, this is My path, which is straight, so follow it;
and do not follow ]other[ ways, for you will be separated from His
way. This has He instructed you that you may become righteous.{]Quran
6:153[
•}It is not for a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and
His Messenger have decided a matter, that they should ]thereafter[
have any choice about their affair. And whoever disobeys Allah and His
Messenger has certainly strayed into clear error.{]Quran 33:36[
The Relationship of the Islamic method with Customs and Traditions:
With the spread of Islam to many countries that each have their own
different customs and traditions, the Islamic method takes three forms
in relation with them:
The first is to support the customs that encourage virtuous principles
and high values and enhancing them according to the eternal Shari'ah
principles. Among these are the neighbor's right, generously hosting
the guest, helping the poor, relieving the needy and assisting the
stranger.
The second is to straighten the customs which have two aspects: one
good and the other bad, by placing emphasis on the good, forbidding
the bad and reforming it according to the Noble Shari'ah.
The third is to resist the straying and misleading customs and
traditions, which oppose its values and principles, and may lead to
gaps in society, disorder of values, the spread of corruption and vice
and the loss of security and tranquility. An example of this is the
practice of girls being buried alive. The Arabs )during the
pre-Islamic days( regarded having a girl as a source of pessimism and
an object of contempt. Then the Quran disapproved of this hideous
custom and protected the girl from this criminal act. He The Almighty
Says )what means(:}And when one of them is informed of ]the birth of[
a female, his face becomes dark, and he suppresses grief. He hides
himself from the people because of the ill of which he has been
informed. Should he keep it in humiliation or bury it in the ground?
Unquestionably, evil is what they decide.{]Quran 16:58-59[
And, the Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:"He,
who has a female )daughter( and he does not bury her alive, disgrace
her nor give preference to his male child over her, Allah will Admit
him into Paradise."]Abu Daawood[
Before Islam, the young girl would also suffer from being coerced into
marriage regardless of her will and consent. Thereupon, Islam
glorified her in this respect when the Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu
'alayhi wa sallam, said:"No previously married woman should be given
in marriage without her consent and no virgin should be given in
marriage without her permission."]Muslim[ Before Islam, the young girl
also suffered being deprived of any inheritance. But Islam assigned to
her a right in the inheritance of her father. Allah The Almighty Says
)what means(:}For men is a share of what the parents and close
relatives leave, and for women is a share of what the parents and
close relatives leave, be it little or much - an obligatory
share.{]Quran 4:7[
Bad Customs:
These days, many bad customs have become widespread among the general
population and it is even more widely spread among women. Among these
customs is the intention of seeking to draw closer to Allah The
Almighty using the dead and Awliyaa' )Pious people who are close to
Allah The Almighty( as a medium. Wailing and screaming upon the death
)of a loved one(. Similar bad customs include visiting psychics and
fortune tellers and following their errors, attachment to amulets,
talismans and charms assuming they bring good and avert evil. Also,
Mushaaharah or Kabsah, which is the belief that if a man with a shaved
head carrying meat, red dates, eggplants or similar items enters upon
a confined woman, he would cause the milk to cease to flow )from her
breast( or delay her pregnancy. And, these are examples of bad customs
that do not please Allah The Almighty and His Messenger, sallAllahu
'alayhi wa sallam, like putting on toupees, visiting coiffeurs,
lengthening finger and toe nails, using dyes and colors to adorn them,
lagging behind the latest fashions of clothing )gothic and other
styles that stick out from the norm(, and so on.
The Duty of the Muslim:
To avoid the potential harms of these matters and prevent corruption
due to them, it is the duty of the Muslim to abandon every custom and
tradition that violates even a single principle of the religious
fundamental principles. He must pause to reflect upon all customs and
traditions and weigh them using the balance of the genuine Islamic
method and adjust whatever does not agree with it or comply with its
rules. If there is a custom or tradition that violates one's creed and
opposes one's religion, he should throw it far away without
hesitation, bashfulness or regret. He should flee from bad customs and
evil traditions and rush toward the secure shadows of Islam
entertaining no fear of critics for the Sake of Allah. His pattern
should follow that of the righteous believers in the ages of Islam who
responded to the call of truth and sacrificed what was valuable to
them in support of it.
Fabricating History:
Some historians fabricated this eternal image of the great men and
leaders of this Ummah. They presented the Muslim caliphs in a light of
men whose main concern was only food and drink, to the extent that it
is attributed to Mu'aawiyah ibn Abi Sufyaan, the Companion of the
Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, that he would eat
very compulsively. This is something unimaginable even from cattle,
let alone from a revered Companion who learnt in the school of the
Messenger of Allah, sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, that a man should
not eat and drink in excess. They also represent to us such a caliph
as Haaroon Ar-Rasheed, as a man who loved women and drank alcoholic
drinks, and so on. All this is attributed to a man who, in his age,
witnessed many conquests, was himself a Mujaahid )one who strives with
his wealth and life in the Path of Allah, The Almighty(, a devout
worshipper of Allah, pious and righteous.
It is obvious from the biographies of such personalities that what has
been said about them are no more than invented lies whose initiatory
purpose is to distort the image of Islam through the character
assassination of its caliphs. As a result, they attempt to claim that
their customs and traditions appear to be in opposition to the innate
human common sense so that the Ummah would criticize its symbols and
celebratory figures. Afterwards, they would have nothing worthy of
mentioning for themselves in the history of mankind. Resentful
criminal historians distorted not only the image of men, but the
believing women as well. During the pre-Islamic days, they would let
their head covers hang down from behind their heads, uncovering their
breasts, necks and collars.
With the emergence of Islam and its spreading light, Allah The
Almighty Says, addressing the women by way of disciplining )what
means(:}and to wrap ]a portion of[ their headcovers over their
chests.{]Quran 24:31[. Upon which, the men turned to their wives to
recite to them what had been revealed by Allah The Almighty in order
to guide them and there was no woman but that she caught hold of her
sheet )of wool( and covered her head )and face( with trust and belief
in the clear Verses revealed by Allah The Almighty. In the morning,
they performed the morning prayer behind the Messenger of Allah,
sallAllahu 'alayhi wa sallam, with their heads covered and motionless,
as if there were crows perched on their heads. ]Abu Daawood and Ibn
Abi Haatim[. But the people represented their behavior as retardation
and not in harmony with the advanced time. Rather, they had their
women come out half-dressed as if they were nude, in order that the
dissolute wolves )amongst men( would quench their craving by the
unlawful glance, and whatever consequent traces of her body he may
recall.
Inherited customs and traditions are among the affairs that are the
most detrimental upon the religion of Allah The Almighty because they
are habitual, the soul inclines to them, the people agree with them
and it is difficult to abandon them. From this point of view, it is
incumbent upon the Muslim to discard anything that opposes the Islamic
Sharee'ah and play an effective role in changing and virtuously
protecting his community in order that its customs and traditions
would be compatible with the Sharee'ah of Allah The Almighty. Men and
women are equal in this respect, perchance the children would rise as
a strong generation, carrying the torch of Islam, and enlightening the
way for all people.
Dought & clear, - How was prayer first prescribed?.
I have heard that during the early years of islam, muslims were told
to perform 40 prayers a day, but this was cut down by 5 each time
ALLAH (S.W.T) knew this was unachievable by majority of muslims until
their were only 5 salat a day were left. is this because ALLAH (S.W.T)
has shown us mercy?.
Praise be to Allaah.
What you have heard about the prayer is not correct. The correct
version is that Allaah initially – on the night of the Mi'raaj when
our Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was taken up
into heaven – enjoined fifty prayers to be performed night and day.
Then the Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) kept
asking his Lord to reduce it until it became five prayers to be
offered night and day. But Allaah decreed the reward of fifty prayers
for these five, so whoever prays five prayers will receive the reward
of fifty prayers.
It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: Abu Dharr narrated that the
Messenger of Allaah(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"The roof of my house was split open when I was in Makkah, and
Jibreel(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came down and split
open my chest and washed it with Zamzam water. Then he brought a
golden vessel filled with wisdom and faith and poured it into my
chest, then he sealed it. Then he took me by the hand and ascended
with me into the lowest heaven. When I reached the lowest heaven
Jibreel said to the gatekeeper, 'Open up!' He said, 'Who is this?' He
said, 'Jibreel.' He said, 'Is there anyone with you?' He said, 'Yes,
Muhammad(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is with me.' He
said, 'Has his mission begun?' He said, 'Yes.' And when it was opened
we went up into the lowest heaven… Then Allaah enjoined upon my ummah
fifty prayers, and I came back until I passed by Moosa who said, 'What
has Allaah enjoined upon your ummah?' I said, 'He has enjoined fifty
prayers.' He said, 'Go back to your Lord, for your ummah will not be
able to bear that.' So I went back and He reduced it. Then I came back
to Moosa and said, 'He has reduced it.' He said, 'Go back to your
Lord, for your ummah will not be able to bear that.' So I went back
and He reduced it further. Then I came back to Moosa and said, 'He has
reduced it further.' He said, 'Go back to your Lord, for your ummah
will not be able to bear that.' So I went back and He said, '(The
prayers) are five but (the reward) is fifty. The Sentence that comes
from Me cannot be changed [cf. Qaaf 50:29].' Then I went back to Moosa
and he said, 'Go back to your Lord.' But I said, 'I feel shy before my
Lord.'…"
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 342; Muslim, 163
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:
What is meant is that they are five with regard to what is to be done,
but they are fifty with regard to the reward.
Fath al-Baari, 1/463
And Allaah knows best.
to perform 40 prayers a day, but this was cut down by 5 each time
ALLAH (S.W.T) knew this was unachievable by majority of muslims until
their were only 5 salat a day were left. is this because ALLAH (S.W.T)
has shown us mercy?.
Praise be to Allaah.
What you have heard about the prayer is not correct. The correct
version is that Allaah initially – on the night of the Mi'raaj when
our Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was taken up
into heaven – enjoined fifty prayers to be performed night and day.
Then the Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) kept
asking his Lord to reduce it until it became five prayers to be
offered night and day. But Allaah decreed the reward of fifty prayers
for these five, so whoever prays five prayers will receive the reward
of fifty prayers.
It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: Abu Dharr narrated that the
Messenger of Allaah(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
"The roof of my house was split open when I was in Makkah, and
Jibreel(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came down and split
open my chest and washed it with Zamzam water. Then he brought a
golden vessel filled with wisdom and faith and poured it into my
chest, then he sealed it. Then he took me by the hand and ascended
with me into the lowest heaven. When I reached the lowest heaven
Jibreel said to the gatekeeper, 'Open up!' He said, 'Who is this?' He
said, 'Jibreel.' He said, 'Is there anyone with you?' He said, 'Yes,
Muhammad(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is with me.' He
said, 'Has his mission begun?' He said, 'Yes.' And when it was opened
we went up into the lowest heaven… Then Allaah enjoined upon my ummah
fifty prayers, and I came back until I passed by Moosa who said, 'What
has Allaah enjoined upon your ummah?' I said, 'He has enjoined fifty
prayers.' He said, 'Go back to your Lord, for your ummah will not be
able to bear that.' So I went back and He reduced it. Then I came back
to Moosa and said, 'He has reduced it.' He said, 'Go back to your
Lord, for your ummah will not be able to bear that.' So I went back
and He reduced it further. Then I came back to Moosa and said, 'He has
reduced it further.' He said, 'Go back to your Lord, for your ummah
will not be able to bear that.' So I went back and He said, '(The
prayers) are five but (the reward) is fifty. The Sentence that comes
from Me cannot be changed [cf. Qaaf 50:29].' Then I went back to Moosa
and he said, 'Go back to your Lord.' But I said, 'I feel shy before my
Lord.'…"
Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 342; Muslim, 163
Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said:
What is meant is that they are five with regard to what is to be done,
but they are fifty with regard to the reward.
Fath al-Baari, 1/463
And Allaah knows best.
Dought & clear, - Ruling on stopping one’sprayer if something serious happens.
If I am praying and someone knocks at the door, and there is no one
else in the house, what should I do? If I stop praying, am I sinning?
Praise be to Allaah.
If a prayer is naafil (supererogatory), there is more room for
manoeuvre, and it is o.k. to stop praying in order to find out who is
at the door. But in the case of a fard (obligatory) prayer, it is not
permissible to stop it unless there is something important which one
is afraid of missing. If it is possible to alert someone else, by
saying "Subhan-Allaah" out loud in the case of men and clapping in the
case of women, so that the person at the door will realize that the
person in the house is busy praying, that will do away with any need
to stop praying. The Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: "Whoever is alarmed by anything whilst praying, let men say
'Subhan-Allaah' and let women clap." (Agreed upon. Al-Bukhaari, 1234;
Muslim, 421).
If it is possible to let the person who is at the door realize that
the person inside the house is praying, by clapping in the case of
women and saying 'Subhan-Allaah' in the case of men, whilst still
praying, this will save you from having to stop the prayer. If that
will not work, because one is too far away from the door or the person
outside will not be able to hear, then it is o.k. to stop the prayer
if necessary, especially if it is a naafil prayer. But in the case of
an obligatory prayer, if it is something important or necessary, and
there is the fear of missing it, it is also o.k. to stop the prayer,
and to repeat it from the beginning. Praise be to Allaah.
else in the house, what should I do? If I stop praying, am I sinning?
Praise be to Allaah.
If a prayer is naafil (supererogatory), there is more room for
manoeuvre, and it is o.k. to stop praying in order to find out who is
at the door. But in the case of a fard (obligatory) prayer, it is not
permissible to stop it unless there is something important which one
is afraid of missing. If it is possible to alert someone else, by
saying "Subhan-Allaah" out loud in the case of men and clapping in the
case of women, so that the person at the door will realize that the
person in the house is busy praying, that will do away with any need
to stop praying. The Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: "Whoever is alarmed by anything whilst praying, let men say
'Subhan-Allaah' and let women clap." (Agreed upon. Al-Bukhaari, 1234;
Muslim, 421).
If it is possible to let the person who is at the door realize that
the person inside the house is praying, by clapping in the case of
women and saying 'Subhan-Allaah' in the case of men, whilst still
praying, this will save you from having to stop the prayer. If that
will not work, because one is too far away from the door or the person
outside will not be able to hear, then it is o.k. to stop the prayer
if necessary, especially if it is a naafil prayer. But in the case of
an obligatory prayer, if it is something important or necessary, and
there is the fear of missing it, it is also o.k. to stop the prayer,
and to repeat it from the beginning. Praise be to Allaah.
Dought & clear, - He suffers from hayfever and wipes his nose during prayer.
i am a hayfever sufferer. in summer my nose starts running. can i wipe
my nose with a handkershief whilst doing salaat? if i do not wipe my
nose it may fall on the prayer mat/mosque carpet or my clothes and the
people might be annoyed to see the water falling on the carpet.
Praise be to Allaah.
You have to prevent this (mucus) from falling onto the carpets in the
mosque, even if you have to put a cloth or handkerchief over your
nose, lest you offend other people. Keep taking care of your nose by
wiping it. We ask Allaah to grant you healing soon.
my nose with a handkershief whilst doing salaat? if i do not wipe my
nose it may fall on the prayer mat/mosque carpet or my clothes and the
people might be annoyed to see the water falling on the carpet.
Praise be to Allaah.
You have to prevent this (mucus) from falling onto the carpets in the
mosque, even if you have to put a cloth or handkerchief over your
nose, lest you offend other people. Keep taking care of your nose by
wiping it. We ask Allaah to grant you healing soon.
IMAM REDA (AS) AND UNFIXED WAGES
That day Sulayman bin Ja'far and Imam Reda (as) had gone out together
for some work. It was sunset when Sulayman bin Ja'far wanted to return
home. Imam Reda (as) said to him: "Come to my house and be with us
tonight." Sulayman bin Ja'far agreed and with Imam Reda (as) he went
to his house.
Imam Reda (as) saw his servants busy in gardening. By the way, he saw
a stranger, who was also busy in gardening with them. Imam Reda (as)
asked: "Who is he?"
The servants replied: "We have hired him today so that he may help us."
Imam Reda (as): "It'a all right. How much wages have you fixed for him?"
Servants: "We will give him something and would make him satisfied."
The signs of displeasure and anger appeared on Imam Reda (as) face and
he wanted to punish them. Sulayman bin Ja'far came forward and said:
"Why do you make yourself uncomfortable?"
Imam Reda (as) said: "I have repeatedly given orders that till the
work and wages are not fixed, never get the work done by anyone. First
fix the wages of the person and then get the work done. Even if you
have fixed the wages, you could give something extra to him after the
work is over. Certainly, when he finds that you have given him more
than the fixed wages, he would be thankful to you and would like you.
And the affection between you and him would increase. And even if you
would give him the wages you have fixed, the person would not be
unhappy with you. But if you do not fix the wages and employ someone
to work, whatever you would give him after the work, he would not
think that you have done a favour to him. Rather, he will think that
you have given him less than his actual wages."
for some work. It was sunset when Sulayman bin Ja'far wanted to return
home. Imam Reda (as) said to him: "Come to my house and be with us
tonight." Sulayman bin Ja'far agreed and with Imam Reda (as) he went
to his house.
Imam Reda (as) saw his servants busy in gardening. By the way, he saw
a stranger, who was also busy in gardening with them. Imam Reda (as)
asked: "Who is he?"
The servants replied: "We have hired him today so that he may help us."
Imam Reda (as): "It'a all right. How much wages have you fixed for him?"
Servants: "We will give him something and would make him satisfied."
The signs of displeasure and anger appeared on Imam Reda (as) face and
he wanted to punish them. Sulayman bin Ja'far came forward and said:
"Why do you make yourself uncomfortable?"
Imam Reda (as) said: "I have repeatedly given orders that till the
work and wages are not fixed, never get the work done by anyone. First
fix the wages of the person and then get the work done. Even if you
have fixed the wages, you could give something extra to him after the
work is over. Certainly, when he finds that you have given him more
than the fixed wages, he would be thankful to you and would like you.
And the affection between you and him would increase. And even if you
would give him the wages you have fixed, the person would not be
unhappy with you. But if you do not fix the wages and employ someone
to work, whatever you would give him after the work, he would not
think that you have done a favour to him. Rather, he will think that
you have given him less than his actual wages."
IMAM REDA (AS): IMAM-E-ZAAMIN (Guarantor)
There is a hadith of the Holy Prophet Mumammad (saw) that when you
travel, you should give charity (Sadaqah). So is it not better to give
the money of Imam-e-Zaamin before you go on your journey rather than
when you get back, so that it may reach the poor quicker.
It is said that the Sura Tawheed (Sura Ikhlas), if written and cut
into two halves, one given to the traveller and the other left at his
home, will always come together again and so ensure the safe journey
of the traveller.
The king at the time of our 8th Imam, Imam Reda (as) was Mamoon Rashid
son of Haroon Rashid. Mamoon Rashid had forced Imam Reda (as) to take
the position of his heir apparent (i.e. Imam Reda (as) was supposed to
take over as king after Mamoon Rashid); because he wanted to be
accepted by the Shias. Although Imam Reda (as) did not want to take
this position, Imam Reda (as) made full use of it to preach Islam
openly. To show to the people how much he thought of Imam Reda (as),
Mamoon Rashid changed the colour of his court from black to green [the
colour of the Imam Reda (as)], Mamoon Rashid also had new coins made
with Imam Reda's (as) name on it.
Each Imam (as) is remembered for a specific thing: EX: 4th Imam, Imam
Zainul Abideen (as)- In illness. 6th Imam, Imam Jafar Sadiq (as)-
For sustenance. And in the same way our 8th Imam, Imam Reda (as) is
called upon when someone is about to go on a journey.
The eight Imam, Imam Reda (as) is also called as Imam-e-Zaamin. When
Muslims go on journeys they take with them something called
Imam-e-Zaamin (another name for Imam Reda (as)) which is some money
tied in a cloth. This tradition probably came from the time of Imam
Reda (as) when people used to carry money with them especially because
it had Holy Imam's (as) name on it. As Mamoon Rashid, the Abbasid
caliph the contemporary of Imam Reda (as), had coins minted with the
name of Imam Reda (as) on them, it was very easy for the Muslims to
carry the name of Imam Reda (as) with them, especially when they went
on journeys.
Imam Reda (as) is also known as Imam-e-Zaamin (as). Zaamin means "The
Guarantor".
One day when Imam Reda (as) was on his historical journey from Madina
to Marw (Khurasan), while in a jungle Imam Reda (as) came across a
hunter who was about to kill a deer. The deer was trying to get away
and when she saw Holy Imam Reda (as), she said something to him. Holy
Imam Reda (as) asked the hunter to free the deer so that she could go
and feed her little baby deers who were very hungry. Imam Reda (as)
also told the hunter that once the deer had fed her babies she would
come back. The hunter allowed the deer to go because Holy Imam Reda
(as) had told him to, but he did not think the deer will come back.
But Imam Reda (as) waited with the hunter until the deer returned with
her young ones. The hunter was amazed on witnessing this miraculous
event and he set the deer free as a mark of respect for Imam Reda
(as). After this historical event Imam Reda (as) became famous as
Imam-e-Zaamin (as).
The famous artist of the contemporary world, Ustad Mahmud Farshchiyan
has depicted this historical event in this beautiful masterpiece
iconograph entitled "Zaamin-e-Aahu" (The Guarantor of the Deer).
travel, you should give charity (Sadaqah). So is it not better to give
the money of Imam-e-Zaamin before you go on your journey rather than
when you get back, so that it may reach the poor quicker.
It is said that the Sura Tawheed (Sura Ikhlas), if written and cut
into two halves, one given to the traveller and the other left at his
home, will always come together again and so ensure the safe journey
of the traveller.
The king at the time of our 8th Imam, Imam Reda (as) was Mamoon Rashid
son of Haroon Rashid. Mamoon Rashid had forced Imam Reda (as) to take
the position of his heir apparent (i.e. Imam Reda (as) was supposed to
take over as king after Mamoon Rashid); because he wanted to be
accepted by the Shias. Although Imam Reda (as) did not want to take
this position, Imam Reda (as) made full use of it to preach Islam
openly. To show to the people how much he thought of Imam Reda (as),
Mamoon Rashid changed the colour of his court from black to green [the
colour of the Imam Reda (as)], Mamoon Rashid also had new coins made
with Imam Reda's (as) name on it.
Each Imam (as) is remembered for a specific thing: EX: 4th Imam, Imam
Zainul Abideen (as)- In illness. 6th Imam, Imam Jafar Sadiq (as)-
For sustenance. And in the same way our 8th Imam, Imam Reda (as) is
called upon when someone is about to go on a journey.
The eight Imam, Imam Reda (as) is also called as Imam-e-Zaamin. When
Muslims go on journeys they take with them something called
Imam-e-Zaamin (another name for Imam Reda (as)) which is some money
tied in a cloth. This tradition probably came from the time of Imam
Reda (as) when people used to carry money with them especially because
it had Holy Imam's (as) name on it. As Mamoon Rashid, the Abbasid
caliph the contemporary of Imam Reda (as), had coins minted with the
name of Imam Reda (as) on them, it was very easy for the Muslims to
carry the name of Imam Reda (as) with them, especially when they went
on journeys.
Imam Reda (as) is also known as Imam-e-Zaamin (as). Zaamin means "The
Guarantor".
One day when Imam Reda (as) was on his historical journey from Madina
to Marw (Khurasan), while in a jungle Imam Reda (as) came across a
hunter who was about to kill a deer. The deer was trying to get away
and when she saw Holy Imam Reda (as), she said something to him. Holy
Imam Reda (as) asked the hunter to free the deer so that she could go
and feed her little baby deers who were very hungry. Imam Reda (as)
also told the hunter that once the deer had fed her babies she would
come back. The hunter allowed the deer to go because Holy Imam Reda
(as) had told him to, but he did not think the deer will come back.
But Imam Reda (as) waited with the hunter until the deer returned with
her young ones. The hunter was amazed on witnessing this miraculous
event and he set the deer free as a mark of respect for Imam Reda
(as). After this historical event Imam Reda (as) became famous as
Imam-e-Zaamin (as).
The famous artist of the contemporary world, Ustad Mahmud Farshchiyan
has depicted this historical event in this beautiful masterpiece
iconograph entitled "Zaamin-e-Aahu" (The Guarantor of the Deer).
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