Plural marriage and fair treatment of co-wives, Dought & clear, - * Difference in spending on two wives, and spending on children of one wife from a previous marriage

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I am married to two wives. I am not quite sure how to be fair towards them regarding financial issues. They both live in different houses. One has 2 children from a different marriage, and the other has one son from our marriage. Do I have a financial obligation towards those children who are not mine? The two households spend different amounts of money on basic necessities (food, electricity, gas, transportation....), how can I be fair towards both and that is the case?
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Praise be to Allaah.
Treating wives equally with regard to spending money and time is waajib (obligatory), unless one of them agrees to forego some of her rights in favour of the other. It is also waajib to treat the children equally, but you do not have to spend on the children from a different marriage unless there is no one to spend on them, in which case their expenses are an obligation on all the Muslims, of whom you are one.
If their accommodation differs in terms of basic necessities because one of the families is larger than the other, there is nothing wrong with that, but the additional spending involved should be related to the larger number of individuals concerned.
Written by al-Khudayr






















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Plural marriage and fair treatment of co-wives, Dought & clear, - * Ruling on women hating polygyny (plural marriage)

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- PUBLISHERNajimudeeN M. MD, IRI (Managing Director, Islamic Research Institution)

What is the ruling on a woman hating polygyny because of jealousy, since jealousy is something natural in women, and we read of the jealousy of ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) concerning the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)? So where do we stand? I have learned from reading some books that hating one of the rulings of sharee’ah is tantamount to kufr.
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Praise be to Allaah.
A woman’s jealousy concerning her husband is something that is innate and natural, and you cannot tell a woman, “Do not feel jealous over your husband.” If a person dislikes something even though it is prescribed in sharee’ah, that does not adversely affect him, so long as he does not hate the fact that it is prescribed. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Jihaad (holy fighting in Allaah’s Cause) is ordained for you (Muslims) though you dislike it, and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you…” [al-Baqarah 2:216]
The woman who feels jealous does not hate the fact that Allaah has allowed her husband to marry more than one woman, but she hates to have a co-wife. There is an obvious difference between the two matters. Hence I hope that the brother who has asked this question, and other people, will think carefully about matters and not rush to judgement; I hope that that they will recognize the subtle differences whereby rulings differ.
From the fatwas of Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen for al-Da’wah magazine

Islamic General Articles, - * If the mother touches her child’s ‘awrah, does that invalidate her wudoo’?

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- PUBLISHERNajimudeeN M. MD, IRI (Managing Director, Islamic Research Institution)

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-Does touching the ‘awrah of a six-year-old child invalidate wudoo’?
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Praise be to Allah
The scholars (may Allah have mercy on them) differed as to whether wudoo’ is invalidated by touching the ‘awrah of a minor.
Some of the scholars are of the view that wudoo’ is invalidated by touching the ‘awrah of a minor, as it is invalidated by touching the ‘awrah of an adult.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
According to the report which says that wudoo’ is invalidated by touching the private part, there is no differentiation between one’s own penis and that of another person, or between the penis of a minor or an adult.
End quote fromal-Mughni(1/118)
The Standing Committee for Issuing Fatwas was asked: Does touching my child’s ‘awrah when changing his clothes invalidate my wudoo’?
They replied:
Touching the ‘awrah without a barrier invalidates wudoo’, whether the one who is touched is a minor or an adult, because it is proven that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever touches his private part, let him do wudoo’.” The private part of the one who is touched is the same as the private part of the one who touches another [with regard to the ruling].
End quote fromFataawa al-Lajnah ad-Daa’imah(5/265).
The second view is that wudoo’ is not invalidated by touching the ‘awrah of a small child.
Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: It was narrated from az-Zuhri and al-Awzaa‘i that no wudoo’ is required for touching the penis of an infant, because it is permissible to touch it and look at it.
End quote fromal-Mughni(1/118)
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) was asked: Does washing the private parts of an infant invalidate wudoo’?
He (may Allah have mercy on him) replied:
No; that is, touching the private part of an infant does not invalidate wudoo’; rather touching a person who has reached the age of puberty does not invalidate wudoo’, unless that is done with desire. Thus we may reconcile between the hadiths of Talq ibn ‘Ali and Busrah bint Safwaan. The hadith of Talq ibn ‘Ali says that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) was asked about a man who touches his penis whilst praying; is he required to do wudoo’? He said: “No; it is just a part of you.” And the hadith of Busrah says: “Whoever touches his penis, let him do wudoo’.”
And we say: If that is done with desire, then wudoo’ becomes obligatory, but if it is without desire, then it is not required. This detail is indicated by the words of the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him): “it is just a part of you.” So if he touches it like touching any other part of the body (then it does not invalidate wudoo’). It is well-known that a person would never touch any other part of his body with desire, is that not so? So we say: If you touch it like you touch any other part of your body, without desire, then you do not have to do wudoo’, but if you touch it with desire, then you have to do wudoo’, because perhaps something may come out of you in the event of desire, without you realising.
To sum up: touching the penis of an adult or a minor does not invalidate wudoo’ unless it is accompanied by desire. The one who washes the private part of an infant definitely does not feel desire.
End quote fromLiqa’ al-Baab al-Maftooh.
What is more likely to be correct, and Allah knows best, is the second view, which is that the mother’s wudoo’ is not invalidated if she touches the ‘awrah of her infant, because this is something that happens a great deal, yet there is no report from the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) to indicate that he instructed the womenfolk of the Sahaabah to renew their wudoo’ every time they needed to touch their children’s private parts, even though mothers often need to do so (when washing and bathing their children and so on).
And Allah knows best.
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NAJIMUDEEN M
* CONTACT- aydnajimudeen@gmail.com