Kind Treatment of Spouses, - Dought & clear, - * Treating premature ejaculation

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My question is concerning premature ejaculation. I suffer from this “illness”. I have been married for nearly two years and this illness has prevented me from having normal intercourse with my wife. I can not satisfy her. Maybe this is a punishment from Allah? However, I read that this is a very widespread illness, and that it can be treated.
There seems to be medical treatment as well as a kind of training/practice. This includes, among other things, that a person stimulates himself by rubbing his penis to learn to deal with the sexual arousal, and even to ejaculate. I know that this is normally forbidden to do, but I do not see a solution for the problem without treatment. I have tried other things before like a special ointment and other stuff, but without success. I am afraid, if I do not treat this illness that I might fall back into sin. There is so much information on the Internet, but I do not know what is trustworthy and what is just a way of making money. What can I do? Please give me advice!.
Praise be to Allaah.
The view that masturbation is haraam is the view of most of the scholars and is supported by shar‘i evidence; in fact all sexual gratification is limited in our sharee‘ah to the wife or concubine (and the latter is not available in our time). Any other means of pleasure used by people is only a means of immorality and spreading mischief in the land, let alone the fact that it is contrary to the fitrah (sound human nature) with which man has been created with regard to the way of fulfilling physical desires. Whatever the case, we find it strange that masturbation is regarded as a means of treating premature ejaculation. What we have read and learned from dozens of medical websites and suggestions for treatment is that masturbation is one of the causes of premature ejaculation; this is according to the testimony of doctors first of all, and also that of those who are suffering from this problem. Hence we do not advise this method of treatment.
But if what you are doing, which requires rubbing the penis, whether maniy (semen) comes out of it or not, if this is a medical treatment that you need, then you can use this method of treatment in a manner that is permissible according to sharee‘ah, by means of intimacy with your wife and masturbation by her hand. The fuqaha’ have stated that masturbation with the wife’s hand is permissible for the husband, because the husband may enjoy all parts of her body – with the exception of anal intercourse – so there is nothing wrong with masturbation with the wife’s hand.
Al-Hattaab al-Maaliki (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Study of the madhhab and the hadeeths indicate that that – i.e., masturbation with the wife’s hand – is permissible. And Allah knows best.
End quote fromMawaahib al-Jaleel, 3/406
Al-‘Allaamah Zakariya al-Ansaari al-Shaafa‘i (may Allah have mercy on him) said:
Masturbation with the wife’s hand is permissible for him as he may enjoy all parts of her body, but with his own hand (it is not permissible) because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts).
Except from their wives or (slaves) that their right hands possess, - for then, they are free from blame;
But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors”
[al-Mu’minoon 23:5-7].
This is among that which is beyond that.
End quote fromAsna al-Mataalib, 3/186
Abu’l-Naja al-Hajaawi al-Hanbali (may Allah have mercy on him) says:
He may engage in masturbation with the wife’s hand.
End quote fromal-Iqnaa‘; see commentary thereon,Kashshaaf al-Qinaa‘, 5/188
And Allah knows best.

- PUBLISHERNajimudeeN M

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Commentary on Hadeeth, - Dought & clear, - * What isthe status of the hadeeth, “No man is scratched by a thorn…”?

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What is the status of this hadeeth?
It was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man is scratched by a thorn, or stumbles, or has a twitching in a vein, except for a sin, and what Allaah forgives is greater.”
Does this mean that everything that happens to a person is because of his sin? I read this in Tafseer al-Qurtubi, and I looked in Saheeh al-Bukhaari and Fath al-Baari, but I could not find it.
Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:
This hadeeth was narrated by al-Tabari inal-Tafseer, 5/175; and by al-Bayhaqi inShu’ab al-Eemaan, 7/153; from the mursal hadeeth of Qataadah.
A mursal report is one which is narrated by a Taabi’i from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), with no narrator in between. This is one of the categories of da’eef (weak) hadeeth. So this hadeeth has a weak isnaad, as was mentioned by al-Albaani inal-Silsilah al-Da’eefah, 1796.
Secondly:
The meaning of the hadeeth is sound and is supported by other evidence from the Book of Allaah and the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). The calamities that befall a man may be as the result of sin that he has committed, so this calamity may be expiation for that sin.
Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Whatever of good reaches you, is from Allaah, but whatever of evil befalls you, is from yourself. And We have sent you (O Muhammad) as a Messenger to mankind, and Allaah is Sufficient as a Witness”
[al-Nisa’ 4:79]
“And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much”
[al-Shoora 42:30]
Ibn Katheer said in his Tafseer (1/529):
“Whatever of good reaches you, is from Allaah” means, it is by the grace, bounty, kindness and mercy of Allaah. “but whatever of evil befalls you, is from yourself” means, it is because of your own actions. This is like the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much”
[al-Shoora 42:30]
Al-Saddi, al-Hasan al-Basri, Ibn Jurayj and Ibn Zayd said: “is from yourself” means, because of your sin. Qataadah said concerning this verse, “is from yourself” means, as a punishment to you, O son of Adam, for your sin.
Thirdly:
The calamities that befall a believer in this world raise him in status and expiate for his sins.
Hence the believer should accept whatever calamities Allaah decrees for him, and should realize that this is good for him.
It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her), the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no calamity that befalls a Muslim but Allaah expiates (sin) thereby, even a thorn that pricks him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5640; Muslim, 2572.
Muslim (2572) narrated that ‘Aa’ishah said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “There is nothing that befalls a believer, not even a thorn that pricks him, but Allaah will record a hasanah (good deed) for him thereby, or erase from him a sin.”
And Allaah knows best.









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Commentary on Hadeeth, - Dought & clear, - * Commentary on the hadeeth; “two types of the people of Hell whom I have not seen…”

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I was read an answer to one of your questioned but i failed to understand the hadith which you posted. In a question It was reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are two types of the people of Hell that I have not seen yet: men with whips like the tails of cattle, with which they strike the people, and women who are clothed yet naked, walking with an enticing gait, with something on their heads that looks like the humps of camels, leaning to one side. They will never enter Paradise or even smell its fragrance, although its fragrance can be detected from such and such a distance.” (Narrated by Ahmad and by Muslim in al-Saheeh). please do some taafsir on it so that i can get to undertand it?.
Praise be to Allaah.
This hadeeth speaks of two types of people whom the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had not seen, as they would appear after his time, and their destiny would be Hell because of their sins. The scholars regarded the appearance of these two types as one of the minor signs of the Hour. They are as follows:
1 – “Men with whips like the tails of cattle” – what is meant is that those who strike people for no legitimate reason, like the oppressive police or others, whether that is on the orders of the state or otherwise.
Al-Nawawi said: With regard to those who would have whips, they are those who work for the police.Sharh al-Nawawi ‘ala Saheeh Muslim, 17/191.
Al-Sakhaawi said: They are now the helpers of the oppressors, and usually it refers to the worst group around the ruler. It may also apply to unjust rulers.Al-Ishaa’ah li Ashraat il-Saa’ah, p. 119.
The evidence that their appearance will be one of the signs of the Hour is a report narrated by Imam Ahmad in which it says: At the end of time there will appear men from this ummah with whips like the tails of cattle. They will go out in the morning under the anger of Allaah and will come back in the evening under His wrath.”Al-Musnad, 5/315; classed as saheeh by al-Haakim inal-Mustadrak, 4/483; and by Ibn Hajar inal-Qawl al-Musaddad fi’l-Dhabb ‘an al-Musnad, p. 53-54.
The second type is “women who are clothed yet naked, walking with an enticing gait, with something on their heads that looks like the humps of camels, leaning to one side.” Al-Nawawi said concerning the meaning of this passage:al-kaasiyaat al-‘aariyaat(translated here as “clothed yet naked”) means that they will uncover part of their bodies to show their beauty, so they will be clothed yet naked. And it was said that they will wear thin clothes which shows what is beneath them, so they will be clothed yet virtually naked. With regard to the phraseMaa’ilaat mumeelaat(translated here as “walking with an enticing gait”), it was said that it means: deviating from obedience to Allaah and from the commandment to guard their chastity, etc.Mumeelaatmeans, teaching others to do what they do. And it was said that Maa’ilaat means walking with an enticing gait andmumeelaatmeans moving their shoulders. And it was said that it means that they try to tempt men by means of showing their adornments.
With regard to the phraseRu’oosahunna ka asnimat il-bukht(translated here as “with something on their heads that looks like the humps of camels”), this may mean that they make their heads look bigger with veils and turbans, which are wrapped around the head, so that they look like the humps of camels. This is the well-known interpretation. Al-Maaziri said: it may be that what is meant is that they will not lower their gaze in the presence of men, rather they will look directly at them.
Sharh al-Nawawi ‘ala Saheeh Muslim, 17/191.
Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen said: The phrase “clothed yet naked” has been interpreted to mean that they wear short clothes that do not cover the ‘awrah that must be covered. And it has been interpreted as meaning that they wear light, thin clothes that do not prevent others from seeing the woman’s skin underneath. And it has been interpreted as meaning that they wear tight clothes that conceal the skin from sight but still show off the woman’s charms.
Fataawa al-Shaykh Muhamamd ibn ‘Uthaymeen, 2/825.
This hadeeth contains a stern warning against committing these two sins:
1- Oppressing the people and striking them unlawfully
2- Women making a wanton display of themselves and showing their charms and not adhering to correct Islamic hijab and noble Islamic manners.
This hadeeth is one of the miracles of Prophethood, for these two types of people have appeared, and they exist now, as al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said.

- PUBLISHERNajimudeeN M