For children, - What "I Love You" really means in Islam!(Husband and Wife relationship in Islam)

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And every time February 14th - Valentine's Day - approaches, I think of Imam Khomeini (ra) the leader of Islamic Revolution in Iran ...
Imam Khomeini's wife would say, "I was never woken up by Imam praying Salatul Layl (Night Prayer) because he would never switch on the room light. When he would go to do Wudhoo, he would place a sponge in the sink under the tap so that the sound of the falling water would not wake me."
Agha (Imam Khomeini) always offered me the better place in the room. He would not start eating until I came to the dinner table. He would also tell the children: 'Wait until Maa comes.'
He was not even willing that I should work in the house. He would always tell me: 'Don't sweep.' If I wanted to wash the children's clothes at the pond, he would come and say: "Get up, you shouldn't be washing."
"On the whole, I have to say that Imam did not consider sweeping, washing dishes and even washing my children's clothes as part of my responsibilities. If out of necessity I sometimes did these, he would get upset considering them as a type of unjust dealing towards me".
"Even when I entered the room, he would never say: 'Close the door behind you,' but waited till I sat down and then would himself get up and shut the door".
Imam Khomeini's daughter Siddika says: "My father had an extraordinary respect for my mother. In the period of 60 years of living together, he did not even reach for food (on the dinner table) before his wife, nor did he have even the smallest expectation from her. I can even say that in the period of 60 years of living together, at no time did he even ask for a glass of water, but would always get it himself".
"He behaved this way not only with his wife but also with all of us who were his daughters. If he ever wanted water we would all enthusiastically run to get it, but he never wanted us to bring and give him a glass of water in his hand".
During the difficult last days of his life, each time he would open his eyes, if he was capable of speaking, he would ask: 'How is Khanom (Imam's wife)?' We would reply: 'She is good. Shall we tell her to come to you?' He would answer: 'No, her back is hurting. Let her rest.'
Here is one of the letters Imam Khomeini (ra) wrote to his wife from Beirut, Lebanon:
"To my beloved wife, O' I die for you. I have always remembered you when you - the light of my eyes and strength of my soul - have been away from me. Your pretty face is shining in my heart like in a mirror ... I really miss you here in Beirut. You can find a lot of beautiful places to visit in the city and at the sea. What a pity that my dearest is not with me ... This has been a good journey so far trip but you are really and truly missed. I miss our son, Seyyed Mustafa. I pray that God will protect you both. I love you so much. Duas and Salaams. Ruhullah Khomeini".

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Hajj, - Hukm al-Hajj wa’l-‘Umrah (rulings on Hajjand ‘Umrah), Dought & clear, - * Affect ofHajj on the soul and life of a Muslim

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How does participating in Hajj affect the life of a Muslim?.
Praise be to Allaah.
Performing the rituals of Hajj has many virtues and there is a great deal of wisdom behind them. The one who is enabled to understand them and do them is blessed with a great deal of good. We will try to list as many as we can here.
1- Travelling for Hajj to perform the rituals; his journey reminds him his journey to Allaah and the Hereafter. When he travels he leaves behind his loved ones, family, children and homeland, and the journey to the Hereafter is like that too.
2- The one who goes on this journey takes with him supplies that will help him reach the holy land, and this reminds him that for the journey to his Lord, he must have with him provisions that will help him to arrive safely. Concerning this, Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“And take a provision (with you) for the journey, but the best provision is At-Taqwa (piety, righteousness)” [al-Baqarah 2:197].
3- Just as travelling is a kind of torment, the journey to the Hereafter is like that too, and many times greater. Ahead of a person there is the agony of death, death itself, the grave, the gathering, the reckoning, the weighing in the Balance, and al-Siraat (a bridge across Hell, over which all must pass), then Paradise or Hell. The blessed one is the one whom Allaah saves.
4- When the pilgrim wears the ihraam garments (two pieces of unsewn white cloth), this reminds him of the shroud in which he will be wrapped. This motivates him to give up sin. Just as he sheds his clothes, he should also shed his sins; just as he puts on two clean white garments, his heart and limbs should also be clean and untainted with sin.
5- When he says at the meeqaat (the point at which pilgrims enter ihraam), “Labbayk Allaahumma labbaayk(Here I am at Your service, O Allaah)”, which means that he has responded to his Lord, may He be exalted, how can he remain in a state of sin without saying to his Lord, “Labbayk Allaahumma labbaayk(Here I am at Your service, O Allaah)”, meaning, I have responded to Your prohibition of them. This is the time to give up sin.
6- When he gives up the things that are forbidden when in ihraam, and keeps busy with the talbiyah and dhikr (remembering Allaah), this shows the state that the Muslim should always be in. This is a means of training and disciplining himself, because he is disciplining himself by giving up what is basically permitted, but Allaah has forbidden it to him in this situation. So how can he transgress the sacred limits that Allaah has set for all times and places?
7- When he enters the sacred House of Allaah, which Allaah has made a place of safety for mankind, this reminds him of safety on the Day of Resurrection, and that no one can attain it without effort and striving. The greatest source of safety on the Day of Resurrection is Tawheed (belief in the Oneness of Allaah) and avoiding shirk (associating others with Allaah). Concerning this Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“It is those who believe (in the Oneness of Allaah and worship none but Him Alone) and confuse not their Belief with Zulm (wrong, i.e. by worshipping others besides Allaah), for them (only) there is security and they are the guided” [al-An’aam 6:82].
When he kisses the Black Stone, which is the first ritual that he does, this trains the visitor to venerate the Sunnah (the way of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)), and not to transgress against the law of Allaah on the basis of his flawed reasoning. He knows that what Allaah has prescribed for mankind is wise and good, and he trains himself to submit fully to his Lord, may He be exalted. Concerning that, ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) said, after kissing the Black Stone: “I know that you are just a stone and you can neither cause harm nor bring benefit. Were it not that I saw the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) kissing you, I would not have kissed you.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (1520) and Muslim (1720).
8- When he circumambulates the Ka’bah, that reminds him of his father Ibraaheem (Abraham, peace be upon him), and how he built the Ka’bah as a place of safety for mankind and called them to come on pilgrimage to this House. Then came our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) who also called people to come to this House. Moosa (Moses) and ‘Eesa (Jesus – peace be upon them both) also came on pilgrimage to this House, which is therefore a symbol of these Prophets. How could it be otherwise when Allaah commanded Ibraaheem (peace be upon him) to build it and venerate it?
9- When he drinks the water of Zamzam, this reminds him of the blessing that Allaah has bestowed upon people in this blessed water, from which millions of people have drunk for many centuries, and it still has not dried up. He is encouraged to say du’aa’ (supplication) when drinking it, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The water of Zamzam is for whatever it is drunk for.” Narrated by Ibn Maajah (3062) and Ahmad (14435). It is a hasan hadeeth which was classed as such by Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) inZaad al-Ma’aad(4/320).
10-The saa’i (running) between al-Safa and al-Marwa reminds him of the great hardship undergone by our mother Haajar (Hagar), and how she ran between al-Safa and al-Marwa looking for someone to save her from the trouble in which she found herself, and especially for water to give to her young son Ismaa’eel (Ishmael). This woman bore this test with patience, and turned to her Lord. In her we have a good example, because when a man remembers the striving and patience of this woman, his problems seem less significant, and when a woman remembers one of her own gender, her hardship becomes easier to bear.
11-Standing in ‘Arafah reminds the pilgrim of the great gathering of mankind on the Day of Gathering. If the pilgrim suffers exhaustion because of the crowding together of thousands of people, then how about when all of mankind are gathered, barefoot, naked and uncircumcised?
12-As we said with regard to kissing the Black Stone, so too when stoning the Jamaraat (stone pillars representing the Devil), the Muslim trains himself to be obedient and to follow the example of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). Thus he manifests pure submission to Allaah.
13-When he offers the sacrifice, this reminds him of the important incident when our father Ibraaheem submitted to Allaah’s command to sacrifice his only son Ismaa’eel (Ishmael), and that there is no room for compassion which goes against the commands and prohibitions of Allaah. It also teaches him to respond to the command of Allaah, as Ismaa’eel said:“ ‘O my father! Do that which you are commanded, In sha’ Allaah (if Allaah wills), you shall find me of As‑Saabiroon (the patient)’” [al-Saffaat 37:102].
14-When he exits ihraam and that which Allaah had forbidden to him during ihraam becomes permissible to him again, this trains him to be patient, and teaches him that with hardship goes ease, and that the outcome for the one who responds to the command of Allaah is joy and happiness. This joy can only be felt by the one who tastes the sweetness of obedience, like the joy that the fasting person feels when he breaks his fast, or that the one who spends the night in prayer feels after he has prayed.
15-When he has finished the rituals of Hajj and done them as Allaah has prescribed and as He likes, and has completed his rituals, he has the hope that his Lord will forgive him all his sins, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) promised when he said: “Whoever comes to this House and does not utter any obscene speech or do any evil deed, will go back as his mother bore him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (1449) and Muslim (1350). This motivates him to turn over a new leaf in his life, free from sin.
16-When he goes back to his wife and children, the joy of meeting them reminds him of the greater joy he will feel when he meets them in the Paradise of Allaah, may He be exalted. This reminds him that true loss is loss of oneself and one's family on the Day of Resurrection, as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):“Say (O Muhammad): The losers are those who will lose themselves and their families on the Day of Resurrection. Verily, that will be a manifest loss!”[al-Zumar 39:15].
This is what we were able to mention.
And Allaah knows best.

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Hajj, - Hukm al-Hajj wa’l-‘Umrah (rulings on Hajjand ‘Umrah), Dought & clear, - * The virtue of Hajj

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If Hajj is accepted does that means that major sins are forgiven?.
Praise be to Allaah.
It was narrated inal-Saheehaynthat Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: “Whoever performs Hajj and does not utter obscenities or commit sin, will come back as on the day when his mother bore him.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1521; Muslim, 1350.
And he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “From one ‘Umrah to the next is an expiation for whatever (sins) came between them, and for an accepted Hajj there is no reward but Paradise.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1773; Muslim, 1349.
Hajj and other righteous deeds are means of expiation of sins, if a person does them in the manner prescribed in sharee’ah. The majority of scholars are of the view that righteous deeds only expiate for minor sins; with regard to major sins it is essential to repent. They quote as evidence for this view the hadeeth narrated by Muslim from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him), according to which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The five daily prayers, from one Jumu’ah to the next and from one Ramadaan to the next, expiate for whatever (sins) come in between them, so long as you avoid major sins.” Narrated by Muslim, 1/209.
Imam Ibn al-Mundhir (may Allaah have mercy on him) and a group of scholars are of the view that an accepted Hajj expiates for all sins, because of the apparent meaning of the two hadeeth quoted above.
And Allaah knows best.

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Hajj, - Hukm al-Hajj wa’l-‘Umrah (rulings on Hajjand ‘Umrah), Dought & clear, - * Does a husband have to take his wife for Hajj?

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My wife has not done the obligatory Hajj. Do I have to go with her for Hajj? Do I have to pay for her Hajj?.
Praise be to Allaah.
If the wife has stipulated in the marriage contract that he must take her for Hajj, then he has to fulfil this condition and take her for Hajj, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The most deserving of conditions to be fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you.” And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“O you who believe! Fulfil (your) obligations”
[al-Maa'idah 5:1]
“And fulfil (every) covenant. Verily, the covenant will be questioned about”
[al-Isra’ 17:34]
If she did not stipulate this condition, then he does not have to take her for Hajj, but I advise him to take her for Hajj for a number of reasons:
1 – Seeking reward, because a reward like hers will be written for him too, and she will have fulfilled an obligatory duty.
2 – That will create love between them, and everything that will create love between husband and wife is enjoined.
3 – He will be praised for this action and he will set an example for people to follow.
So let him seek the help of Allaah and take his wife for Hajj, whether she stipulated that he should do so or not. But if she did stipulate that, then he is obliged to fulfil it.

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