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As'salamu Alaikum - - - - - - - - Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Safar 7, 1435 - - - - -
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Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Salam
Personalities, - Hazrat Syed Imam Zainul Aabideen
Sayyid al-Sajjad Imam Abu al-Hasan Ali
Zain al-'Aabideen Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho
Sayyiduna Abu al-Hasan Ali, Imam Zain al-'Abideen is the fourth Imam and Shaykh of the Silsila Aaliyah Qaadiriyah Barakaatiyah Razviyah Nooriyah. He was one of the greatest Aabids of his era. Imam Zuhri (Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho) says, (In my era) I have not seen any Quraysh more excellent than Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho). Hadrat Ibn Abbas (Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho) used to look at Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho) and refer to him as the Beloved of the Beloved.
BIRTH:
He was born on a Thursday the 5th of Shabaan 38 Hijri in Madinah Munawwarah.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen, Vol. 1, Page 207]
NAME:
Hadrat Imam Hussain kept most of his children names attached to the name Ali. This was due to his love for his father Sayyiduna Ali (Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anho). He was thus also named Ali. He was also known as Abu Muhammad, Abul Hassan, Abul Qaasim and Abu Bakr. His titles were Sajjad, Zain al-'Aabideen, Sayyidul Abideen, Zakki and etc.
EDUCATION:
He spent two years with his grandfather Sayyiduna Ali (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho), ten years with his uncle Sayyiduna Imam Hasan (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) and eleven years with his father, Hadrat Imam Hussain (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho).
BLESSED MOTHER:
His mother was known as Umm-e-Wulad, and was also known as Shahar Banu Radi Allahu Ta'ala Anha. She was very pious and Allah fearing.
HIS FEATURES:
He was the image of his grandfather Sayyiduna Ali (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho). He was tan in complexion and not very tall. He had a full beard on which he used henna (mehndi).
PREDICTIONS OF HIS BIRTH:
Hadrat Jaabir (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) says, I was in the blessed court of the Prophet (Sallallaho Alaihi wa Aalihi wa Sallam) and Imam Hussain (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) was in the blessed arms of the Prophet (Sallallaho Alaihi wa Aalihi wa Sallam). The Prophet (Sallallaho Alaihi wa Aalihi wa Sallam) said, O Jaabir (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)! A son shall be born to him, whose name shall be Ali. Then he will have a child, whose name shall be Muhammad (Imam Baaqir). O Jaabir! If you meet with him, then you should pass my salaams to him.
HIS CHARACTER:
Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) was blessed with beautiful character, which he definitely inherited from his illustrious forefathers. He was very eloquent and very respectful. He was always willing to assist those in need. Umar Abu Nasr writes that Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) purchased various slaves, and then set them free. He would be kind even to those who were his personal enemies. Once he heard that there was a certain person who always spoke ill of him. Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) went to him and treated him with such respect and kindness, that he repented from his bad behaviour and affiliated himself to the great Imam. Many great poets have written numerous Qasidas in praise of his kindness and generosity.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen, Vol. 1, Page 208]
HIS EXCELLENCE:
Abu Haazim says, I have not seen any Jurist more exalted than him.
Zahbi and Ainiyah have said, We have not seen any Quraish more exalted than him.
Hadrat Imam Maalik (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) says, He is from the Men of Excellence
Ibn Abi Shaiba says, In Hadith, the most exalted chain of transmission is that which is narrated from Imam Zain al-'Abideen, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) where he narrates from his father Imam Hussain (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho).[Masaalik as-Saalikeen]
Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) was always prepared to sacrifice everything he had for Islam. He sacrificed all his wealth twice for Islam. He was a very generous person. He used to discreetly send money to the poor people living in Madinah Shareef and none of them knew that the money was coming from him. The only time this became known to them, was after his wisaal.[Tarikh al-Khulafa]
HIS PATIENCE :
He was a person with great patience. After the Battle of Karbala, HE was marched to Damascus in chains and in the time of Abdul Malik bin Marwan , he was arrested and chained. He was then forced to walk from Madinah to Syria in chains. With all this, he never complained or said one word about his condition in the Court of Allah . He instead remained patient and made Shukr (thanked Allah ) on every step. Imam Zain al-'Abideen's most loyal student Sayyiduna Imam Zuhri could not bear to see the Imam in this condition, so he went to Abdul Malik bin Marwaan, and had the great Imam released. He then took him back to Madinah Shareef with great respect.[Khazinat al-Asfiyah, Vol.1, Page 31/32]
Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen had a very soft heart and always thought of the sacrifice that was given by his Father Imam Hussain and all the other Martyrs on the plains of Karbala.
Once, he was walking in the blessed streets of Madinah Munawwarah, when he saw a person placing a goat on the ground, and was sharpening the knife before making the animal zibah. On seeing this, he became very saddened and thought of the martyrdom of his father. He then began to weep bitterly and asked the man, “My dear Brother! Did you give the goat some food and water or not?”The man replied that he had fed and given water to the goat for the past three days and had also fed it water just before laying in down. On hearing this, Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen let out a sigh of pain and said, “It is sad, that the people of Kufa did not even care for him like (you care for) the goat. They starved him for three days and nights and then martyred him in this state.”[Masaalik as-Saalikeen]
He used to perform one thousand rakaats of nafil salaah every night. One night whilst he was performing his nafils, his house caught on fire. The people were rushing around trying to put of the fire, but he continued his Namaaz with total sincerity. After he completed his salaah, the people told him that his house had caught on fire and yet he continued reading his salaat (Namaaz) without any showing any sign of panic. He said, “You were trying to extinguish this fire, and I was trying to extinguish the fire of the hereafter.”[Khazinat al-Asfiyah, Vol.1, Page 31]
A person once swore at Imam Zain al-Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) and made slanderous remarks to him.
In response, Imam Zain al-Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) said to him: 'If the attributes, you accuse me of, are found in me then I repent to Allah Azzawajal and ask for forgiveness. If the attributes are not found in me then on your behalf I ask Allah Azzawajal for forgiveness and repentance.'
The person saw Imam Zain al-Abideen's patience and was overwhelmed by it. He stood up, kissed Imam Zain al-Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) on the forehead and said: 'May my soul be sacrificed for you! Whatever I accused you of was wrong. I seek forgiveness from you and I request you to pray to Allah Azzawajal for the acceptance of my repentance.'
Imam Zain al-Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) agreed to pray to Allah Azzawajal on his behalf.
HIS IBAADAT:
After the shahaadat of his blessed father Imam Hussain (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho), he completely divorced himself from the materialistic world. He spent all his time in the remembrance of Allah. He would pass his days and nights thinking of the tragedy of Karbala and weeping. When Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) used to sit down to perform wudhu, then his face used to become pale, and when he stood in Namaaz, then his complexion would change to such an extent, that it would be difficult to recognise him. The people would ask, O Beloved of the Prophet (Sallallaho Alaihi wa Aalihi wa Sallam)! What has happened to you?and he said, O People! Namaaz is a time when you are present in the Court of Allah. Who is so naive as to smile and look happy, when he is standing before his Creator.[Awaarif al-Ma'arif, Page 475]
He used to perform one thousand rakaats of nafil salaah every night. One night whilst he was performing his nafils, his house caught on fire. The people were rushing around trying to put of the fire, but he continued his Namaaz with total sincerity. After he completed his salaah, the people told him that his house had caught on fire and yet he continued reading his Namaaz without any showing any sign of panic. He said, You were trying to extinguish this fire, and I was trying to extinguish the fire of the hereafter.[Khazinat al-Asfiyah, Vol.1, Page 31]
Imam Talha Shafi'i (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) writes that once shaitaan appeared in the form of a snake whist the Imam was in Salaah. He caught the toe of Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen in his mouth, but the Imam did not even move or show sign of discomfort. After some time, he became disillusioned and stood a distance away from the Imam. Then, a voice was heard thrice, saying the following words, You are the Jewel of the Worshipper, You are the Chief of those who prostrate (to Allah).
HIS FEAR FOR ALLAH:
He was a personality who truly feared Allah. His heart flowed with the fear of Allah. Once during Hajj, he tied his Ehraam but did not say the Labbaik. The people asked him the reason for this, and he said, I fear the I will say Labbaik and Allah will say, I do not accept your presence (Hajj). The people then told him that his Ehraam would not be proper if he did not say Labbaik. He then said Labbaik, and began to tremble in the fear of Allah until he fell off his camel and became unconscious. This continued throughout the Hajj, every time that he said Labbaik.[Khazinat al-Asfiyah]
RECITATION OF THE HOLY QUR'AN:
Hadrat Imam Jaafar Saadiq (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) says, When my grandfather, Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) used to recite the Quran, then the beauty of his recitation attracted the people towards him and all those listening to him would become so overwhelmed with the fear of Allah, that one did not know the condition of the other.
RETURN FROM THE BATTLE OF KARBALA:
When Imam Zain al-'Abideen was returning to Madinah after the Battle of Karbala, he said a few stanzas. A few stanzas are being presented for blessing.
“O Winds! If someday you pass by the sacred land, then pass my salaams
before the Rawda al-Aqdas where the most exalted Nabi rests
The Sadness of separation from Madinah feels
like a sword stuck deep into my liver
How fortunate are the people of that city in
which is the Exalted and Beloved Prophet
O Rahmatulil Aalameen! Assist Zain al-'Abideen.
Who is standing alone and in difficulty amongst the tyrants.”
Once a person asked Imam Zain al-'Abideen about who will be looked upon as pious and good on the last day and he said,“That person, who when he is happy, his happiness does not drive him towards wrong and that person, when he is angry, then his anger does not remove him from what is right.”
In other words, when you are happy, you should not let your happiness take you towards bad deeds and when you are angry, then you should not allow your anger to blind you from that which is right.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen]
Maqam Sayyaduna Imam Zain al-'Abideen in Egypt
RESPECT FOR THE KHULAFA:
Once some people from Iraq, came to visit Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho). During their visit, they began to say disrespectful words concerning Hadrat Abu Bakr, Hadrat Umar and Hadrat Uthman (Ridwanullahi Ta'aal Alaihim Ajma'een).
When they had completed saying what they wished to, He said, Tell me, are you from amongst the first Muhajireen, concerning whom Almighty Allah says, "Those who were driven out from their homes and their possessions seeking the grace of Allah and His Pleasure, and helping Allah and His Messenger. They are the truthful."[Surah Hashr verse 8]
They replied in the negative, by saying that the verse did not refer to them. Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) then asked if they were from amongst the Ansaar, concerning whom Almighty Allah says in the Quran, And those who had established their homes in this city, with faith, from inception, They, (who) show love to those, who migrated towards them, and who find no need in their hearts, for that which has been left, and they give preference to them over their lives, even though they are in great need.[Surah Hashr verse 9]
Again, they answered in the negative. He then said, I swear, that you are not even worthy of this verse of the Quran wherein Allah says, And those who came after them say, O Allah! Pardon us and our brothers, who brought faith before us, And keep not in our hearts hostility towards those with Imaan. O Our Lord, Verily you are most Compassionate, Most Merciful.
After saying this, he asked them to leave his presence. In other words, he showed them that they were not from amongst the Muhajireen, or the Ansaar, or even from amongst the believers. He therefore shunned them for being disrespectful to the Khulafa-e-Thalaasa.
KARAAMAT:
The Karaamats of Imam Zain al-'Abideen are numerous, but a few are being quoted for attaining blessings.
Incident During Hajj:
Two people where making tawaaf of the Kaaba and came to Hajr-e-Aswad. When they touched the Hajr-e-Aswad, both their hands became stuck on it. People tried very hard to release their hands, but it was not possible. Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen entered the Haram whilst this was happening. He said Bismillah hir rahmaan nir rahim and then placed his hands on the Hajr-e-Aswad. Immediately the two peoples hands were released.[Khazinat al-Asfiyah, Vol. 1, Page 34]
The Deer:
Once Hadrat had gone into the jungle with his companions. As they sat to eat, a deer passed by them. The Imam called to the deer and asked it to partake in the meal with them. The Deer immediately came to the Imam and partook in the meal provided.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen, Vol. 1, Page 11]
A Deers Complaint:
A deer once came to Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho), whilst he was in a jungle. The animal fell to the ground and began to say something. Those with the Imam asked what had happened. The Imam said that the deer was complaining about a man who captured her child. Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) summoned the man. The man brought with him the child belonging to the deer. Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) asked him to release the deer, which he gladly did. After some time, the deer took its young, and said something and then left. Those present were amazed and asked the Imam what the deer said as she left. The Imam said, She said, JazakAllahu fi Darain Khair.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen]
HIS CHILDREN:
Almighty Allah blessed Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideen (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) with fifteen children. Their blessed names are as follows :
Sons:
1. Hadrat Muhammad (Imam Baaqir), (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
2. Hadrat Zaid, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
3. Hadrat Imraan, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
4. Hadrat Abdullah, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
5. Hadrat Hassan, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
6. Hadrat Hussain, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
7. Hadrat Hussain Asghar, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
8. Hadrat Abdur Rahmaan, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
9. Hadrat Sulaiman, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
10.Hadrat Ali, (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho)
11. one more son whose name is not known.
Daughters:
1. Hadrat Khadija,
2. Hadrat Fathima,
3. Hadrat Aliyah,
4. Hadrat Umme Kulthoom (Ridwanullahi Ta'ala Alaihim Ajma'een).
Hadrat Imam Zain al-'Abideens (Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho) descendants are from Hadrat Imam Baqir, Hadrat Zaid, Hadrat Abdullah, Hadrat Hussain Ashgar, Hadrat Imraan and Hadrat Ali (Ridwanullahi Ta'ala Alaihim Ajma'een) All of them were blessed with numerous children.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen]
WISAAL SHARIF:
He was given poison by Waleed bin Abdul Malik and was thus made shaheed on the 18th of Muharram and according to some narrations on the 12th or 22nd of Muharram at the age of 57 or 58. He passed away in Madinatul Munawwarah and his Mazaar Shareef is in Jannatul Baqi. Few have said that his Mazar Sharif is in Egypt and there is a Mosque and Shrine of Imam Zain al-'Adideen in Cairo, Egypt as well but the majority have accepted his Mazar Sharif being in Baqee al Garqad, Madina Munawwarah. ALLAH Knows the Best!
After his wisaal, his camel placed its head on his mazaar shareef and cried. Hadrat Imam Baqir tried to move it away, but it refused. In the end, he said, “She will die in this exact place.” Eventually she did pass away at the Mazaar of Imam Zain al-'Abideen.[Masaalik as-Saalikeen, Vol. 1, Page 207]
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Personalities, - What Happened After Martyrdom of Imam Hussain
Amazing Incidents after the Martyrdom of
Sayydiuna Imam Hussayn Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anhu
It is recorded that when this blessed head arrived before the unclean Yazeed, he began to touch it with his cane. At that moment, a Christian ambassador from Rome was also present. When he saw this, he remarked surprisingly,
“In a church on one of our islands, there a hoof which is said to belong to Nabi Esa’s donkey. Every year, people come from far and wide to see this hoof and also take oaths through it. We also respect it as you people respect the Kaba. However, what have you done with the son of your Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him? I bear witness that you people are indeed misguided.”
Another Jew remarked that,
“There were seventy generations which separated me from Nabi Daud (as family) and yet, the Jews still respected me. And yet, you people have yourselves killed the son of the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him.”
In the evening, this caravan travelled onwards towards Madina Sharif. On arrival in Madina Sharif, it brought with it a scene from Qiyamat. Every house was filled with grief and sadness.
It is said that immediately after the martyrdom of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho, blood actually rained down from the sky. A person called Nasra Azdayah admits that,
“When we awoke in the morning, every container in the house was filled with blood. The sky was so dark during the day that even the stars could be seen. Whatever stone was turned in Syria, below it was blood.”
In one narration it is stated that
“This darkness in the sky lasted for nearly seven days and the walls seemed like it was covered by red colour similar to a flame. It seemed like there was a continuous storm among the stars and they were also smashing against each other.”
Abu Sa'eed says that
“Whatever stone was overturned in the world, below it was fresh blood. The sky rained blood. In the lands of Khurasan, Kufa and Syria, the houses and walls were dripping with blood.”
The Ulama declare that this redness which is seen during the dawn was never present before the actual Shahaadat. This redness remained in the corner of the sky, then become apparent everywhere.
The frightful end of those who took part in the
Martyrdom of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anhu
Abu Shaykh narrates that whoever took part or assisted in the martyrdom of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho, each and everyone became victims of some tragedy.
Once, an old man proudly boasted that nothing had ever happened to him. When he was trying to set a light, suddenly fire engulfed him. He began to scream, “Fire, fire” and jumped into the Tigris. However, he could not manage to put off the fire until finally he went to his final destination which was the fire of hell.
Mansoor bin Ammar narrates that
The killers of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho became victims of such immense thirst that no matter how much they drank, they could not quench their thirst.
Sadmi narrates that
“A person once invited him to Karbala and people were speaking among themselves that whoever was responsible for the martyrdom of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho had died a disgraceful death. The person who had invited me declared that he had also been involved in this and that nothing had ever happened to him. The following night, while he was preparing a fire, suddenly the fire engulfed him and he was burnt beyond recognition”.The narrator admits that when he saw the body, it was burnt to ashes.
Imam Zuhri admits that,
“Some were killed, some became blind and the faces of some became black.”
Imam Waaqidi narrates that,
“There was once an old man who was present during this incident but was not involved. Suddenly he became blind. When he was asked the reason for this, he replied that he had seen the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him in his dream. The sleeve of the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him was folded and in his blessed hand was a sword. In front of the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him, ten of the killers of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho lay dead. He then turned to the old man and said angrily, “By been present, you had increased their numbers. He then placed a drop of the blood of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho on my eye and when I awoke, I found that I was blind.”
Sabat ibn al-Joza narrates that
“The person who had hung the blessed head of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho on his horse, after a few days, his face became blacker than coal. When people asked him the reason for this and also mentioned to him that his face used to always look bright and fresh, he replied that, ‘Every night, two people approach me and grabbing me by my shoulders, they throw me into a flaming fire with my head over the fire. The flames continue to lick away at my face.’ It is said that he had a very bad death.”
An old man admits that
Once he saw the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him in a dream in front of which there was a tray of blood. People were then presented to the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him and each person is stained with this blood. When this old man approached the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him, he admitted that, “I was not present.” However, the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him replied, “But this is what you wished in your heart.” The Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him then pointed at him with his right index finger and in the morning, he found that he was blind.
Imam Haakim narrates that once the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him declared to Jibreel-e-Ameen,
“Almighty Allah has declared that in retaliation for the death of Nabi Yahya bin Zakariyah, I have killed seventy thousand and in revenge for Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho, I have killed seventy thousand and another seventy thousand.”[Al Mustadrak, Vol. 3, Page 485,Hadith no. 4408]
All praise is due to Almighty Allah in that He has taken his retribution from ibn Ziyad for the sake of Imam Hussain Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho. It is stated that when he was killed with his companions, all their heads were placed and people came to see. The narrator declares that,
“I saw a snake suddenly appear. After going through all the heads, it finally came to the unclean head of ibn Ziyad. It went through one nostril opening and appeared through the other nostril. This continued for a few times.”
Mansoor narrates that,
“I saw a person in Syria once whose face resembled that of a pig. When I asked him the reason, he replied, that, ‘I used to curse Hadrat Ali and his pure family. One night, I saw the Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him in my dream and Imam Hasan Radi Allahu Ta’ala Anho complained about him. The Holy Prophet Peace and Blessings of Allah Be Upon Him cursed him and spat on his face. Suddenly his face took the shape of a pig.”
wa al-'Ayadhu Billahi Ta'ala!!
- PUBLISHED by" NajimudeeN_M-INDIA "
Women site, - To Every Girl - Before You Make the Big Decision
One day, I received a call from a girl who, after giving me some information about someone who had proposed to her, asked me whether I thought he would make a suitable husband for her. Although I knew neither the girl nor the young man in question, I could perceive her trepidation, for whoever’s hand is asked in marriage faces a rather decisive question.
What often happens is that we hasten to evaluate the financial status of a potential husband and his job prospects that will decide the quality of his lifestyle and social status; and consequently, we take the decision of either accepting or rejecting him, based on that. However, that is a deceptive indicator which has often brought misery and suffering upon our girls.
This girl got me thinking; so, I began to search for signs that might help others like her in making this serious decision. I will try to mention some of them here, but I must say that these are general guidelines, and every case has specific details, which must be addressed separately.
First, ask about him in theMasjid)mosque( close to his house. A young man who takes care in performing his prayers is likely to similarly preserve his marital home, and Allaah The Almighty will not let him fail in that.
It is true that those who practice their faith devoutly prove themselves to be more sincere and devoted to the success and preservation of their conjugal life. That is because they consider marriage as an extension of their religious observance.
Second, inquire as to how many friends he has and how long his relationships have been with them. The number of friends a person has, indicates the nature of one's character. A young man who has a strong relationship with only one or two people, in other words, an introvert, will not positively interact in his relationship with a future wife. In fact, he would be placing great emotional and psychological burden on her. Girls often mistakenly believe that it is good if a man continuously stays at home, but this is incorrect. On the other hand, men who have had illicit relationships possess a behavior that is detrimental to marital life.
A young man who maintains his friendships for years would be expected to make his marriage work. However, if he is known for moving from one friend to another every few months, that has negative and serious implications.
Third, how he treats his sisters is an important indicator. A young man's respect for his sisters' wishes and needs, and his help and service to them in one way or another, demonstrates his attitude toward females and his potential wife.
Fourth, his servant who attends to his small demands, employee or waiter, who serves him tea, will disclose important information about him, for a noble person respects people of a lower status just as he respects his counterparts. Such a man would smile at them and greet them every morning, and be generous when compensating them for their services. It is people like him that are further expected to be good to their wives. Likewise, the ill-natured, who respect only those they stand to benefit from and look down on others, pose a serious threat to a conjugal life.
Fifth, watch out for rage issues. A young man who does not control his temper is weak, regardless of his massive build or loud voice. Anger has grave consequences on marital life, for it has ruined many homes and shattered the lives of many people. How truthful the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, was, when he said:"A strong person is not the one who defeats people at wrestling, but ]he[ is the one who controls himself at the time of anger."
Sixth, the attention he pays to his work and his job performance, is an indication of a man's earnestness and commitment, and is applicable no matter what one’s line of work may be. A salesman who concentrates on his work and performs it to the utmost of his ability is likely to be more committed to his marriage than an irresponsible, failing university professor.
Undoubtedly, it is vital to directly ask about the suitor and seek information from various sources. However, this might yield misleading information, especially when it is his friends and close acquaintances that are consulted. That is why I mentioned these practical points.
In conclusion, I would like to remind you to resort to Allaah The Almighty in asking Him to facilitate the proposal of a righteous husband before he comes to you. You should also performIstikhaarah)guidance-seeking prayer( before consenting to or refusing anyone who has sought marriage to you.
May Allaah The Almighty shroud you with happiness, and may your life always be filled with joy.
What often happens is that we hasten to evaluate the financial status of a potential husband and his job prospects that will decide the quality of his lifestyle and social status; and consequently, we take the decision of either accepting or rejecting him, based on that. However, that is a deceptive indicator which has often brought misery and suffering upon our girls.
This girl got me thinking; so, I began to search for signs that might help others like her in making this serious decision. I will try to mention some of them here, but I must say that these are general guidelines, and every case has specific details, which must be addressed separately.
First, ask about him in theMasjid)mosque( close to his house. A young man who takes care in performing his prayers is likely to similarly preserve his marital home, and Allaah The Almighty will not let him fail in that.
It is true that those who practice their faith devoutly prove themselves to be more sincere and devoted to the success and preservation of their conjugal life. That is because they consider marriage as an extension of their religious observance.
Second, inquire as to how many friends he has and how long his relationships have been with them. The number of friends a person has, indicates the nature of one's character. A young man who has a strong relationship with only one or two people, in other words, an introvert, will not positively interact in his relationship with a future wife. In fact, he would be placing great emotional and psychological burden on her. Girls often mistakenly believe that it is good if a man continuously stays at home, but this is incorrect. On the other hand, men who have had illicit relationships possess a behavior that is detrimental to marital life.
A young man who maintains his friendships for years would be expected to make his marriage work. However, if he is known for moving from one friend to another every few months, that has negative and serious implications.
Third, how he treats his sisters is an important indicator. A young man's respect for his sisters' wishes and needs, and his help and service to them in one way or another, demonstrates his attitude toward females and his potential wife.
Fourth, his servant who attends to his small demands, employee or waiter, who serves him tea, will disclose important information about him, for a noble person respects people of a lower status just as he respects his counterparts. Such a man would smile at them and greet them every morning, and be generous when compensating them for their services. It is people like him that are further expected to be good to their wives. Likewise, the ill-natured, who respect only those they stand to benefit from and look down on others, pose a serious threat to a conjugal life.
Fifth, watch out for rage issues. A young man who does not control his temper is weak, regardless of his massive build or loud voice. Anger has grave consequences on marital life, for it has ruined many homes and shattered the lives of many people. How truthful the Prophet,sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, was, when he said:"A strong person is not the one who defeats people at wrestling, but ]he[ is the one who controls himself at the time of anger."
Sixth, the attention he pays to his work and his job performance, is an indication of a man's earnestness and commitment, and is applicable no matter what one’s line of work may be. A salesman who concentrates on his work and performs it to the utmost of his ability is likely to be more committed to his marriage than an irresponsible, failing university professor.
Undoubtedly, it is vital to directly ask about the suitor and seek information from various sources. However, this might yield misleading information, especially when it is his friends and close acquaintances that are consulted. That is why I mentioned these practical points.
In conclusion, I would like to remind you to resort to Allaah The Almighty in asking Him to facilitate the proposal of a righteous husband before he comes to you. You should also performIstikhaarah)guidance-seeking prayer( before consenting to or refusing anyone who has sought marriage to you.
May Allaah The Almighty shroud you with happiness, and may your life always be filled with joy.
- PUBLISHED by" NajimudeeN_M-INDIA "
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