Duas

1. At the begining of making wudu
-
Prophet (SAW)'s Prayers
At the begining of making wudu
Recite:
بِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ
"I begin in the name of Allah, who is the Most Merciful, Most Gracious".
It is stated in the hadith that one should begin wudhu with Allah's
name. No words have been specified and our elders read the above. It
is recorded in some ahadith that wudhu is valid although no"Bismillah"
is recited.
(Mishkat)
**********************
2. During wudu
-
Prophet (SAW)'s Prayers
During wudu
Recite:
اللَّهُمَّ اغْفِرْ لِي ذَنْبِي وَوَسِّعْ لِي فِي دَارِي وَبَارِكْ لِي
فِي رِزْقِي
"O Allah, forgive my sins and widen my grave and grant barakat in my
Rizq (sustenance)".
(Hisnul Hasin)
**********************
3. On completion of wudu
-
Prophet (SAW)'s Prayers
On completion of wudu
Look towards the sky andrecite:
أَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لَا شَرِيكَ لَهُ
وَأَشْهَدُ أَنَّ مُحَمَّدَاً عَبْدَهُ وَرَسُولَهُ
"I testify that there is no one worthy of worship besides Allah. He is
all by Himself and has no partner and I testify that Muhammad is
Allah's Rasul (Messenger)".
Eight doors of Jannah will be open for the reciter of this dua. He
willbe able to enter from whichever door he pleases. (Mishkat)
It is recorded in the samenarration that the dua should be recited three times.
(Hisnul Hasin)
Thereafter this dua should be recited
اللَّهُمَّ اجْعَلْنِي مِنَ التَّوَّابِينَ وَاجْعَلْنِي مِنَ الْمُتَطَهِّرِينَ
"O Allah, count me (make me) among those who seek forgiveness and
amongst those who stay clean".
(Hisnul Hasin)
Also recite this dua
سُبْحَانَكَ اللَّهُمَّ وَبِحَمْدِكَ أَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا
أَنْتَ أَسْتَغْفِرُكَ وَأَتُوبَ إِلَيْكَ
"O Allah, You are pure, I praise You and testify that only You are
worthy of worship and I seek forgiveness from You (I turn to You for
forgiveness).
(Hisnul Hasin, from Mustadrak)
********************************************

Death is not the end

Every self will taste death. We test you with both good and evil as a
trial. And you will be returned to Us. (Surat al-Anbiya': 35)
Death, which is certain to happen to all of us, is a very important
fact in one's life. We can never know exactly what we will experience
in an hour or even in the next moment. This being the case, it is
obvious how wrong it would be to plan our lives based on events that
may never happen. Death, on the other hand, is the only thing that is
certain to happen. Only the recognition of this basic truth makes us
understand that we must found our lives according to it. Death is also
a part of the trial of man. Allah informs us in the Qur'an that He
created death and life totry man:
He Who created death and life to test which of you is best in action.
He is the Almighty, the Ever-Forgiving. (Surat al-Mulk: 2)
Death is the end of merely the life of this world-thus the end of the
trial-and the beginning of the next life. For this reason, believers
have no fear ofdeath. The thought of death does not distress them,
because, every moment of their lives is spent in the pursuit of good
deeds as preparation for the Hereafter.
For unbelievers, however, fear causes them great distress, because
they consider it a complete annihilation. Thus, they avoid the thought
of death and they don't even let that thought pass their mindsand they
escape from death. But it is futile. No soul can escape death when the
predetermined time for it has come. This, in a verse, is stressed as
follows:
Wherever you are, deathwill catch up with you, even if you are in
impregnable fortresses...(Surat an-Nisa': 78)
To avoid the thought of death is to avoid the truth. As death will
eventually catch up with man sooner or later, it is wise to conduct
oneself with a mind busy with the thought of death. This is the
rational disposition by which believers abide. Until death comes upon
them,they engage in good deeds, as Allah commands us in the Qur'an:
And worship your Lord until what is Certain comes to you. (Surat al-Hijr: 99)
Thinking about death strengthens one's spirit and will. It prevents
one's lower soul from leading him astray, by being lured through the
false temptations of this world. It instils him with the resolve and
determination to avoid all forms of behaviour unpleasing to Allah. It
is for this reason that a believer must often think about death,
neverforgetting that all people, including himself, will someday die.
From the Qur'an, we learn what really happens to someone who dies, and
what he or she actually experiences and feels. When we see someone
dying, we only observe his "biological death." The truth is, however,
the dying person, though in a totally different dimension, confronts
the angels of death. If he is a unbeliever, his death causes him great
pain. The angels of death, after extracting his soul, beat and torment
him. A unbeliever's trauma is described as follows:
...If you could only see the wrongdoers in the throes of death when
the angels are stretchingout their hands, saying,"Disgorge your own
selves! Today you will berepaid with the punishment of humiliation for
saying something other than the truth about Allah, and being arrogant
about His Signs." (Surat al-An'am: 93)
How will it be when the angels take them in death, beating their faces
and their backs? That is because they followed what angers Allah and
hated what is pleasing to Him. So He made their actions cometo
nothing. (Surah Muhammad: 27-28)
Death promises great joyand bliss for the believers. Contrary to
unbelievers, whose soulsare torn from them violently, the souls of
believers are drawn from them gently. (Surat an-Nazi'at: 2) This
experience is similar to the case of the soul in sleep, which leaves
the body and moves into a different dimension (Surat az-Zumar: 42). In
the verses, the followingis stated regarding believers:
Gardens of Eden which they enter, with rivers flowing under them,
where they have whatever they desire. That is how Allah repays those
who have fear for Him: those the angels take in a virtuous state. They
say, "Peace be uponyou! Enter Paradise for what you did." (Surat
an-Nahl: 31-32)

Sin and repentance

One of the reasons for people's detachment from the morality of the
religion is that they consider themselves unforgivable out of the deep
distress they feel because of the sins they have committed. Satan
attempts repeatedly to instil such groundless thoughts in human
beings. To one who has committed a sin, he stealthily whispers the
message, "You are wicked and rebellious against Allah." If he has
committed only a few sins, satan tempts him tosin still more. Towards
his purpose, satan employs the feeling of embarrassment man feels
towards Allah, but manipulates this feeling in order to draw man
further distant from Allah.
However, like all others, this trick of satan's is a feeble one. The
fact that someone committed a sin does not mean that he has been
cursed by Allah, and that he will never be able to follow the straight
path again. Not just one simple sin, but even if he were to commit the
greatest sins,over and over again, he will always have the opportunity
to repent and turn towards Allah. Allah informs us in the Qur'an that
He will forgive each person whosincerely repents of his sins, that is,
asks for forgiveness and remains firm in not committing the same sin
again:
But if anyone repents after his wrongdoing and puts things right,
Allah will turn towards him. Allah is Ever-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
(Surat al-Ma'ida: 39)
Allah is infinite in mercy. In a verse of the Qur'an, He provides the
good news to His servants, "...I am the Ever-Returning, the Most
Merciful" (Suratal-Baqara: 160). Every individual has the opportunity
to repent. Allah even accepted the repentance of some Jews, who went
astray and worshipped an idol they made out of gold, after having
believed in Him, and forgave them:
And when Moses said to his people, "My people, You wronged yourselves
by adopting the Calf so turn towards your Makerand kill your own
(guilty) selves. That is thebest thing for you in your Maker's sight."
And He (Allah) turned towards you. He is the Ever-Returning, the Most
Merciful. (Surat al-Baqara: 54)
After repentance and asking for Allah's forgiveness, a person may well
again become heedless, committing thesame sin again. In fact, this may
happen many times over. However, provided that that person repents
once andfor all, and is committed to not sin again, he may hope for
Allah's mercy.
Nevertheless, as it is in every issue, the important factor is
sincerity. An insincere action is unacceptable inAllah's sight. If one
is notresolved to ending his sinning, and says, "I will repent
eventually," he is clearly insincere, which is likely to bring sorrow
to man. Allah warns those who hold such rationale as follows:
Allah only accepts the repentance of those who do evil in ignoranceand
then quickly make repentance after doing it. Allah turns towards such
people. Allah is All-Knowing, All-Wise. There is no repentance for
people who persist in doing evil until death comes to them and who
then say, "Now I make repentance," nor for people who die unbeliever.
We have prepared for them a painful punishment. (Surat an-Nisa':
17-18)

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Story -, Moons Peak [FINISHED]- Swear Allegiance (chapter 27)

Sitting in the visitor's lounge, with my hands cupped around a foam
cup of coffee, I waited for what seemed like forever when I spotted
Dr. Levvy as he strolled in with his green scrubs. Hisdark green eyes
sought out the room as they settled back on his clipboard.
"Mrs. Heins?" he read off a clipboard.
I sat there for a little while longer, frowning as he repeated the
name.My head snapped up a second too late, realizing I'd put my last
name as Satchel's family name. I gulped the stodgy coffee down, and
discarded the cup into the wastebasket.
"That's me." I raised my hand, as his eyes settled on me with a nod.
He gestured for me to followhim to the back, and into his office.
Yawning, I trudged over to Dr. Levvy, rubbing my eyes in the process.
"Howis he?" I asked, though I had trouble keeping my voice from
trembling. I tried not to think about the way Satchel's wolf form had
looked in the woods, lying desolate on the ground, as if he'd given
up. But the memory was so vivid, I had to blink a couple of times to
make sure I was still in the waiting room in a hospital. I searched
Dr. Levvy's face for answers, but the look on his face made me think
he was going to give me the wrong one.
His tight lipped smile spoke louder than words,and the impending truth
I was trying desperately to avoid, was nearing its end. I was afraid I
was going to hurl my coffee all over his shoes from the bad news.
"It doesn't look so good. Here, have a seat." He urged me to sit, as
he took a seat in his swivel chair, but I shook my head. I'd been
sitting for almost twenty two hours,I don't think I could handle a
minute more.
"I'm perfectly fine standing, what's wrong. Is he going to be okay?"
Iasked, more focused on his hands than I was withhis expression. I
couldn't seem to look in his eyes for fear of seeing the mark of pity.
His hesitation spoke louder than words, and I had a hard time
regaining my composure.I squeezed my eyes shut briefly, and heaved in
an exaggerated breath, onlyto pin them back on him moments later.
"Tell me," I pleaded. The intensity of his stare made me think he
hadn't heard me, but then his face changed, and he cleared his throat.
"Please, just tell me," I whispered, my voice quivering a little.
With another gesture, he gestured for me to sit, so I reluctantly
complied. Myarms sought comfort around myself, I had to force myself
to suck in a couple of breaths. I swallowed, feeling a lot smaller
than I'd felt before I came in. I let my eyes roam the walls of the
office, trying to focus on the high level certificates plastered all
over it, trying to focus onsomething other than thenews I was about to
get. Isilently prayed, that if there was a God somewhere up there,
that maybe he'd give me an answer I wanted to hear, because hearing
Satchel is dead was not an option.
"He's suffered multiple blows to the head, stomach and foreleg,
causing a clot in the mainartery in the cerebral cortex and internal
bleeding just under the pelvis. We found several fractures on his
vertebrae, as well as a huge amount of blood loss from his foreleg.
We've had to rush him into theatre twice now."
My heart constricted, feeling an achy pain simmer to the surface. "Dr.
Levvy, I just need to know if he's okay?"
He nodded, and his smile turned genuine. A little hope filtered
through meat that little gesture, but Ididn't want to get my hopes up
too early. My eyes instinctively closed, silently awaiting his final
speech.
Abruptly, I felt warm hands on my shoulder, and my eyes jolted open.
Dr. Levvy's forest green eyes met mine, and I had a moment of clarity,
as henodded. "The bad news is: he's in a coma…the good news is, he's
still breathing."
A long awaited breath dispersed out of my lips, at his last statement.
He was still breathing. Thosewords alone were music to my ears.
"For how long?" I asked amoment later.
His face took on a new expression, and that feeling lodged in the back
of my throat was back again.
He kicked his legs backward, making his swivel chair roll away from
me, as he swung it left under his desk to retrieve a clipboard. "We're
not entirely sure how long. It could take days, weeks, months even
years."
"Years?" I breathed.
He nodded, typing in his computer, and the whirring of the printer
sounded seconds later. "As I said, we're not sure, but we're doing
everything we can to bring him back to awareness." He scribbled
something at the bottom left hand corner of the small paper and handed
it to me. I frowned, looking down at the undecipherable scribbles that
Dr. Levvy had marked on the paper. I could just make out the word
Tylenol, and Benadryl. I looked up at him with my eyebrows raised in
question.
"For you, to help you sleep."
My facial expression belied my thoughts. I wastired to the point of
restlessness, but I couldn't sleep until I saw him with my own eyes.
"May I see him?"
"Sure, come with me." I followed him through two lengthened corridors,
stuffing the prescription into my backpocket, and keeping my eyes on
the path in front of me. The fluorescent glare from the lights above
reflected off the white floors, and the squeak of shoes meeting the
linoleum sounded as we passed doctors, and patients lurking the halls.
"So, how long have you been married?"
I snapped my attention back over at Dr. Levvy and frowned. "Excuse me?"
He smiled. "You and the patient. You must be newly weds, considering
your age, Mrs. Heins."
I blinked, liking the fuzzy feeling I got at the title. I smiled,
recognition flaring on my face. "Oh, yeah, you can say that."
"Congratulations."
"Yeah," I muttered lightly, hating the fact that I was lying. Of
course, I couldn't exactly go back on my lie now that I'd been only
seconds away from seeing Satchel, but it still felt wrong to lie like
this.
We halted from a pair of swinging doors, as he opened it half way for
me to go in. "Just through those doors. Remember, he's still breathing
so he can hear you."
I gave him one last appreciative glance, and smiled. "Thanks, Dr. Levvy."
I pushed open the doubledoors, leaving Dr. Levvy out in the hallway.
Not even seconds later, I was hyperventilating when my eyes settled on
the figure lying peacefully onthe gurney. Tears prickedthe corner of
my eyes as Itook him in, and I was fighting the urge to spill them
when I saw wires attached to his mouth, his nose and practically
sprawling out all over hisbody as if he'd been covered in spaghetti.
He was no longer in his wolfform, and I silently wondered at what
point of his trip into the hospital had he gone through his
transition, and what or rather whom had been there to witness it.
Especially sincethey'd had a call out for ainjured animal, not a
injured human. Satchel.
He looked paler than I'd ever seen him, and smaller now that he was
lying down with his eyes closed. His hair stark and smoothed out over
the white expanse of the hospital pillows, and his chest bare save for
the spaghetti wires that sprouted out every this way and that. I
wanted to curl up beside him, and protect him from anything that posed
a threat to him. The instantneed to protect him was more out of
instinct than out of compassion, though there was a lot ofthe latter
that my human self had conjured up in the last few minutes I'd been
staring at him. I realized I hadn't gained afoot closer to him,
neither had I been breathing. The thought of losing him like
this—inthis unnatural state, made my inner wolf scream to be loose, so
it can howl out in sorrow.
Especially when I witnessed his left leg. It had been amputated from
the shinbone down,and it had been bandaged to the point ofno
recognition.
My eyes leaking as I reached to touch his face.He was so cold, so
alone, so peaceful.
I fought for control, but I was slowly losing the battle. The machine
to my left reminded me thathis heart was still pumping, but judging
from the pace of the beeping noise, it didn't sound so good. Letting
my hands roam the contours of his face, I felt his stubble over his
chin, realizing that I'd never recognized it before. He must've
groomed often, since he never had it before when I'd been with him. I
thought of all the times I'd had encountered him, and the first day
I'd arrived inDenvers Drove. The distant memory of his kisses, and
that one nightI'd spent with him when he'd suffered small bites of
hypothermia. The piercing glow of his light green eyes, and the
scentthat lingered in his skin. Iremembered it all, and I couldn't
believe that all of those memories could be just that: memories.
"Satchel…I..." My throat caught, and I swallowed, trying to convey a
simple message that would let him hear me. My inner wolf threatening
to howlout in sorrow, but I contained it. Though, there was no holding
back my tears, and his figure blurred for too long before the next
seeped out. Running my fingers down his arms, I squeezed his hands.
What used to be a simple gesture to say, "I'm still here", turned out
to be a pleading question "Are you still here?"
I squeezed again, and three times for good luck, but I got the same
response. Nothing.
"Squeeze my hand if you could hear me?" I whispered in his ear,
running my other hand over his hair. It was longer than I remembered,
even the way his eyelashes teased the top of his cheekbones, made it
seem like they were thicker. My eyes flickered toward his hands to see
any life in them, but nothing. His hands swallowed mine whole, but the
only movement was coming from me.
"Anything, just to know you're okay?" I pleaded, but the only voice
that bounced back was the beep of the machine.
Bursting into tears, I tookhis hand and placed it to my lips to kiss
it. My silentprayers drowning my thoughts, and my tears making a pool
out of my face.
My eyes raked over his body, landing at the missing part of his left
leg, and I cried harder. Sniffing uncontrollably every time he didn't
respond.
I must've been there for hours now, just holding his hand. Waiting for
thatlittle sign that said he was alive. Sure, the machine was still
beeping, but I could barely hear a pulse that assured me that he was
still here.
Night time had come, and a doctor had informed me that I could rest up
in the visitors lounge, eat something at least, but I refused to leave
his side. I'd even been told that visitors weren't allowed privileges
of staying overnight, but Dr. Levvy pulled some strings, and though he
couldn't provide me with a bed, he allowed me to stay be his side.
I couldn't leave him like that. I wouldn't.
I crawled onto the gurney, and lay beside him. Though the gurney
lacked sleeping space for two, I maneuvered myself so I could fit,
careful not to disturb anywires that hooked him tothe machine. Lying
downin the crook of his arm, I burrowed my head into his warmth trying
to inhale as much of his scent as I could, trying to determine if his
heart was still beating on its own. Barely, I silently thought.
The drone of the beepingsound clouded my ears, praying that he'd wake
up. Begging that he'd wake up. I'd always cherished the feeling I had
when I woke up nextto Satchel, to his sweet caresses. But as I woke
up, there was no caressesfrom his hands, no sweet murmurs of his
promises. Just the beeping sound of a machine, which was the thin line
holding him between life and death.
***
Several weeks passed and still no sign of Satchel's recovery, but
while his condition had altered the way I thought, and how life as
Iknew it, seemed impossible to carry on, I couldn't let myself wallow.
For Derryn's sake.
I'd put up a front to please her, and try act like Satchel's recovery
was imminent, instead ofthe hollow thought of hisimpending death that
threatened to drown me.Derryn kept my optimisticviews in tact. Her
light smiles, and hard work ethic reminded me too much of Satchel, but
I hidmy feelings.
Over the weeks, we'd spread Mrs. Heins ashes over the stream just
inches from the willow tree, saving half of it for Satchel to do as he
pleased...when he woke up.
I cursed when a light sting fired up my leg as I hauled a bunch of
sticks toward the backyard of my fathers estate.
"Stupid trees!" I exclaimed, kicking the wooden branches that would
later serve as a warm blanket to warn off the remnants of winter, as
it made its everlasting mark on our estate. Spring was due, and though
there was evidence of melted snow,the air still felt crisp and cold.
Derryn sidled up beside me, bending down to retrieve the stack of
branches I'd dropped on my foot.
"You know, it'll help if you tied a flax around the bunch, that way
you can carry it by the string."
I watched her tie a strip of flax around a bunch ofstick branches, and
madean extra loop at the top to compensate for a handle. I marveled at
her work and brains, raising my eyebrows at her.
"How old are you again?"
Her head perked up. "Seven and a half," she said triumphantly.
"Hmm…could've fooled me." I kneeled beside her, making identical knots
around each pile ofbranches, hauling one in each hand, while leaving
Derryn to carry the small piles.
The light breeze swept my bangs to the side, andI could just make out
a faint smell of pine in the air. I looked to Derryn, watching her
small ringlets bounced as we made our way back to the estate. "You
know, this is kind of therapeuticworking in the woods. You guys make a
living out of this stuff?"
Derryn nodded. "Of course, it's the only way we know how to survive."
I smirked, hiking up the bunch of branches in my right hand because
they were slipping out of my grasp. The sound of our boots crunching
in the gravel, kicking up left over snow that had turned brown from
the rain. "See, I'm almost convinced you have a thirty year old soul."
Derryn giggled, clutchingthe branches with two hands. "That's what
mama always says," she breathed, as if she were out of breath.
We stacked the pile of branches with the rest of them out the back of
my late fathers estate, and kicked our boots off to grab a couple of
drinks.
I had to remind myself to write down a shopping list, because our
winter storage was running low,and I still had to think about what I
was going to do about the Heins manor. I hadn't had time to clean it
up, so it was still in its messy state since Mrs. Heins death.
Although, I had to thank Satchel for taking care of Sheeba's wolf
body, storing it in a big freezer down in his basement. Hestressed her
wolf pack—or what was left of them, would be back to claim her, and
give hera proper burial.
"Willy, when do you think he'd wake up?"
I jumped at the sound of Derryn's sing song voice, forgetting I'd had
her as company, and sighed, making my breath form foamy white clouds
in the air.
Shrugging, I knelt down to avoid her stare. Her light green eyes that
regarded me expectantly made the unknown answers that I was about to
let free, feel like I was suffocating. I didn't have that answer, and
I didn't want to blind her with hopeful promises.
So I said the most convincing truth I believed. "Hopefully, soon."
I handed her a cup of hotcocoa, as we both sat on the steps in the backyard.
She smiled, and squeezedmy hands. "I wish he was here right now. He'd
be faster at getting our wood."
I laughed, eyeing the three piles of branches, and a loose pile of
wood near the door. "Me too." And I really meant it. We finished off
our cocoa's, and the smell of burnt pine lingered in the air, causing
a tingle to my nose. The instant goosebumps crawling upmy arms sent me
on high alert. Derryn's eyes had changed too, and as if she could
smell it too, shesniffed the air.
"Derryn, get in the house."
She bolted upright, and sprang toward the door. "Lock the doors, and
close all the windows." The sound of her footfallspounded around the
house, as she slammed each door, and windows.
The smell was stronger, and I stood up in a fighters stance, scanning
the pine trees for any trouble, grabbing for the shot gun my father
had stored in his estate. I'd practiced how to use it over the weeks
Satchel lay idle in his bed, but I was still a little off when it came
to shooting a bulls eye.
There, on the right. I could just made out movement to the right, as
leaves rustled in the distance. I poised the shot gun in the air,
tryingto level it out toward the target.
"Don't shoot."
I squinted to see if I couldget a better look, and frowned when a
familiar half naked boy came bustling through the forest, with his
hands in the air in surrender. The tousled brown hair, and the taut
muscles on his chest made him look older, but his big yellow eyes made
my honey ones narrow in suspicion,when I knew who it was. It was
Cairo—the brown wolf that had not only attacked me—but forced Derryn
into a wolf, and marked her as his.
I glared. "Step any closer,and my trigger hand will slip."
He paused in his tracks, as a leather animals skin flapped at his
waist covering what modesty he had left. I still couldn't see the
resemblance to Sheeba, or Trench, wondering how it was they were
related at all, let alone being Sheeba's twin brother.
Then the weirdest thing happened, as a few otherboys stepped out
behind him as I noticed twenty odd faces materialize outof the brush.
All dressed in different animal skin to cover below their waist, and
each of them kneeling down on one knee, and pounding theirfists into
the gravel making the leaves and birds shudder from the treetops.
"We're here to swear allegiance to our Alpha, and to protect our Alpha
female and the kid."
"You're what?" I breathed, slightly lowering the shotgun in my hand.
Cairo was on his knees, his head down but his eyes looking up to me.
"We're here to swear ourallegiance to you and ourAlpha—Black wolf."
I stood glued to my spot, as each pair of eyes stared up at me with
hopeful gazes. Different greens, and blues and every color in between
stared back at me, still kneeling in a line, as if they protected us
from the many mysterious the forest had to threaten me. Derryn had
come out to witness it all, and her eyes were just as wide.
"What are they waiting for?" Derryn whispered to me, and I shook my
head, blinking again at the sight of them. I gnawed on my bottom lips,
astonished and baffled at the same time.
A few cleared their throats, coughed and some didn't move at all. Just
their eyes staring, and waiting for something.
"Umm…you guys are a pack?" It was the stupidest thing that cameout of
my mouth, but I was so overwhelmed, it was the only thing that managed
to escape my lips.
Cairo smirked, and nodded once. "To serve you, and our Alpha,
BlackWolf." He frowned abruptly. "Which by the why, I haven't seen
yet. Where is he?"
"He's…" I scratched the back of my head, wondering if I should
tellthem that he was at the hospital. The mere though crossed my mind,
but maybe telling them was a bad idea? There was a lot of males lined
out of the backyard, but we were the only females. And knowing Satchel
wasn't here, who knows what they would do to us, even if just minutes
ago they'd sworn allegiance to protect us. What if they only said it
because they thought Satchel was here? What if knowing Satchel in his
vulnerable state, they wouldn't feel so threatened any more and start
attacking us?
"Well?"
"He's…"
"Right here."
I blinked, whipping my head around at the familiar husky croon that
I'd been praying to hear since that night in the forest, and my eyes
had to blink a couple of timesto see Satchel, with Derryn on his right
side, and a wooden cane with intricate designs carved into it, on the
left. He hada slight limp to him, but he looked older. His dark hair
slicked back into a ponytail, a white shirt underneath a pair of crisp
ironed slacks with black suspenders, both matching his beige
pinstriped fedora he wore on his head.
His green eyes as brilliantas I remembered them, that caught the
overhangof the sun, peering through a slit of gloomy clouds. He caught
sight ofme, in a pair of steel capsthat were way too big onme, and old
worn out overalls that was coveredin soot, mud and pine when Derryn
and I had been salvaging for wood.
I felt self conscious underhis scrutiny, feeling like adollar bill
beside his million bucks of good looks. He must have thought I looked
disgusting, as I noticed grit and grime buried in my chipped nails. I
ran a hand over my hair, as a trail of pine showered in tow, blushing
under his gaze. I hadn't seen him inalmost three months, andseeing him
now, made my heart thrum violently in my chest. Surely I was dreaming,
I had to be, because the last time I'd heard Satchel, he was lying in
a coma.
"Derryn, I'm dreaming aren't I?"
"No," she said, smiling like the sun shone in her eyes. I had a hard
time breathing, let alone smiling.
"Pinch me," I heard myself say.
I flinched under the tiny jolt of pain that stung on my arm where
Derryn had pinched me, squeezing my eyes shut again for emphasis. When
I opened them, Satchel was right in frontof me, the smell of faint
pine and gum, and pure Satchel wafting though my nose. A smell I'd
missed for too long.
He grabbed for my hands, rubbing at the calluses that had formed on
the inside of my palms. "Surely I'm the one dreaming, because the
Willy I knew would never get her hands dirty."
I smiled, my face heating up at the gentle touch of his hands. They
were smooth as silk, with no blemishes, or visible calluses of years
working on the estate.
Grimacing, I turned my hands over, flicking dirt out of my nails.
"Yeah, they're kind of disgustingat the moment. If I knew you were
coming, I would've cleaned up to make myself presentable."
He shrugged, a sly smirk teasing his lips. "I don't know, I kind of
like the way you look right now."The hypnotic low voice was
refreshing. I'd missed his voice. He brushed a stray hair out of my
face, sweeping it over my ears. "You smell like the forest," he
murmured.
"You smell awake...err..." I blushed, "I mean, you'reawake," I stammered.
We turned to the awkward coughing coming from behind. I had completely
forgottenwhere we were. I watched Satchel's eyebrows frown. "What'sall
this?" He gestured toward Cairo and the lineof males that were still
kneeling before us, moving in front of Derrynand me, to ward off any
threats.
Cairo spoke up, "We're here to swear our allegiance to you, Alpha."