Q: Salaams,
I am a Muslim woman born and raised in a Muslim family. I've always
had faith in Islam and would never even consider changing my faith as
Islam is my way oflife. However, I strayed and hence have some major
complications in mylife and I would really like some advice on my
issue below.
10 years ago, I met my husband. We dated for approx 6 years on and
off; we were in a physical relationship. He was a born and raised as a
Hindubut did not really practice his religion.
When we decided to get married within the first year of the
relationship, I had told him that it wouldonly be possible if he was a
Muslim. By this time in our relationship, I had left home for him and
we were living together and I was not in contact with my parents or
even talking to my family. I had moved in with him.
I eventually moved out and told him that if he cannot convert then, I
wouldn't be able to marry him and would both have to move on. He
loved me very much and said he would look into Islam and maybe
consider it. In between this time I became pregnant and toldhim that I
would not get rid of my child and that I could not marry him if he was
not a Muslim (his parents found out I was pregnant and asked him to
move out and disowned him).
So, he converted to marry me and said he would look into it believing
he is a Muslim as he had said the shahada. After a few months he told
me that Islam was not for him, buthe promised that the children will
be raised as Muslims and he will not interfere when it comes toraising
the children in Islam. But from then in myheart I have had doubts
whether my marriage is valid, if he does not believe that he is a
Muslimand think of Islam as his religion.
Since then, mashallah I have two children, a son five and a daughter
three, whom I wouldn't change for the world; as my husband promised
the children are being raised as Muslims and even if he does not agree
with anything, he does not interefere when it comes to the children.
My husband also takes my son to Eid namaz because he says its part of
his son'sreligion.
We have both regained contact with our parents and they know the
situation, and left me to find the right way in my life.
Two months ago my husbands father passed away, as a son he fulfilled
his duties when it came toperforming all the funeral rites. His
parents live in a different city, since the passing of his father he
has left the family home and moved there to look after his mother and
has asked me to move there too. We will not be living in the same
house as his mother but close by so as he can look after his mother.
Before I moved there, I really need to clarify the doubt that I have
lived with for such a long time. I have never found peace in my heart,
not knowing and need theanswers to my questions.
My husband believes that there is only one God and everyone prays to
one God, he is genuinely a good person and believes that religion
does not define a person. He has an open mind when it comes to Islam
but does not consider himself a Muslim and at his death he would make
arrangements to be cremated.
So you probably know what my question is? If I carry on living with
him, ismy marriage valid? Am I living in sin? Please could you explain
to me how and what should I do. What options do I have? Does he need
to convert and believe he is a Muslim for my marriage to be valid?
My children love their father to bits and it breaksmy heart because
they do miss him very much, but I really need to follow the right path
for peace at heart and an example to my children. Please advise.
Jazak Allah,
adamza.
A: assalamalaikum,
IN YOUR CASE IT IS SIMPLE PL TAKE OUT SHOW A HARDCOPY GIVE TO YOUR
HUSBAND IN HAND AND ALSO TELL HIM SIT IN ONE PLACE AND READ FIX IT IN
HIS MIND THAT THE WORSHIP OF ONE GOD HE SAYS THAT WORLD IS DOING IS
ACCORDING TO THEIR WHIMS AND FANCIESNOT ACCORDING TO ONE GOD ALMIGHTY
YR HUSBAND BELIEVES -WIHTOUT OBEDIENCE-
IDOL WORSHIP THE UNFORGIVABLE SIN IF MAINTAINED UNTIL DEATH-
[22:73] O people, here is a parable that you must ponder carefully:
the idols you set up beside GOD can never create a fly, even if they
banded together to do so. Furthermore, if the fly steals anything from
them, they cannot recover it; weak is the pursuer andthe pursued..
[22:74] They do not valueGOD as He should be valued. GOD is the Most
Powerful, the Almighty.
Idol-worship not to be taken lightly
God warns us that idol worship is an unforgivablesin if maintained
until death. So God willing we should try not to fall into such an
offense that has grave consequences.
[4:116] GOD does not forgive idol worship (if maintained until death),
and He forgives lesser offenses for whomever He wills.
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'' Our Lord ! grant us good in this world and good in the hereafter and save us from the torment of the Fire '' [Ameen]
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{in Arab} :->
Rabbanaa aatinaa fid-dunyaa hasanatan wafil aakhirati hasanatan waqinaa 'athaaban-naar/-
(Surah Al-Baqarah ,verse 201)
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