Sunday, June 17, 2012

My husband wants the mahr back, but he owes me the same amount!

"O you who have believed,it is not lawful for you to inherit women by
compulsion. And do not make difficulties for them in order to take
[back part of what you gave them unless they commit a
clearimmorality." (Surah Nisa, Ayah 19)
Assalam alikum,
I am a female who lives in the United States. I got married to a
gentleman last year on March 2011.
After few months, my husband was not taking care of me financially.
He was also very stubbornand was creating a lot of havoc in the house,
which was very hard for me and my kids from previous relationship. My
husband was accusing me of a lot things which were not true including
cheating on him. My husband would like to fight as soon as he comes
home and sometimes every night at 2am or even 4am.
I tried to do what he wanted but he was alwaysmaking up new stories.
After many fights, I tried to convince him to leave me and divorce me,
he would say he would but the next day he would apologize and say he
will try to do better.
I got him out of the house after many attempts of fixing our
relationship after 5 months or less (endof june) of marriage because
my kids were having nightmares and wecouldn't sleep when he was home
because of his aggressiveness! More attempts were made on my part to
get back together but he would always promise and fight after we start
talking again.
Please advise me how to get divorced from him since its been almost a
year since our seperation and he doesn't take care of me and give me
my rights. Please note that he insisted that he will never divorce me!
The other thing is that we got married in the mosqueonly and there are
no documents between us! We met with the sheikh who did our nikah to
get divorced and I agreed to give him back the dowry but when I
recalled that my husband owes me the same amount of money, the sheikh
didn't accept that and said I would haveto pay him back as agreed
upon.
How is it right that I give that money that he owes me on other
matter? Please help thank you!

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