Story, - My messed up life

it all started when i was 12, i had friends that are alder than me,
very older.. and they were dating and i was very curious into knowing
what dating felt like, so i had my first boyfriend who was 6 years
older than i was, i know, it was not clever but i loved him.. this guy
would play me like a ball, i would see him with other women but i ddnt
care as i believed it was love... so i kept holding strong, till he
started beating me becsuse he believed i was misbehaving, i still
stood by him, even after de puches and the kicking, he impregnanted my
friend and claimed it was a mistake and i believed him and still held
on, i mean thats how much i realy loved the guy..he was my
everything... till one day there was a public function and evryone who
was evryone was there and he decided to beat me up in public as he was
so drunk and it was that moment that i decided im done with him, thou
i loved him...i completed my school and went to varsity, now i started
dating different men coz i was hurt that it didnt workout with the
love of my life, so i would date not for long and dump them, these ppl
loved me but i ddnt care and juniour was one of them, he cried for me
when i broke up with him, i felt pity but i had just cum out of a
relationship with the love of my life so i ddnt care much,juniour
realy wanted it to work coz he introduced me to his family but i was
just not ready for that so i dumped him... then i met this guy (let me
call hm henry). henry was very patient with me even with all my crap
of giving him a tough time,he was still patient and i started liking
him alot and when i finaly fell for him, his ex started with me,
threatening me, calling me with his phone and all that crap, but i
still held on as im one who likes competitions alot, i had a
graduation party and both henry and juniour were there, henry ewas
mr.party but sumhow i wished juniour was..so after the party henry
leftbek to his plce as he had to work de following day, i kissed
juniour and we talked and i fell for him hard this time but there was
nothing i could do as i was with henry. than one morning henry's ex
calls me at 3am with his phone, i was very pissed but i ddnt ask him
abt it, i decided to hangout with this guy who was crazy about me and
henry got to hear about it, apparently they told him im sliping with
the guy, so he broke up with me...it hurt me alot but i am a strong
person i pulled up and then i went bek to juniour and still with him,
im in contact with his family and i like it but the problem is i feel
as if juniour is pulling bek, i think he has fear that i might dump
him again, but i wont im inlove with him now more than ever... but he
kips blowing me off and ja its all my fault, i messed up my life coz
now henry wants me bek, do i go bek or do i stay with juniour...i have
realy grown fond off him