I am a Muslim girl, praisebe to Allah, and I am Turkish. I have been
married for 16 years, butI am facing a problem in my marriage which is
that I do not like to havesex with my husband and I am reluctant to
have intercourse with him. We have intercourse every two months, and
we have four children. This problem is because I do not like intimacy
with men; I love women and Ilove women's bodies. But despite that I do
not want to get divorced from my husband because he loves me very much
and we have four children. But this matter is beyond my control. In
order to overcome this problem my husband started to wear women's
clothing for me before going to bed, and in fact this approach has
been successful and I found myself attracted to him and we have
started engaging in sexual intimacy more than oncea week. But my
husband does not wear these clothes outside the house; rather he only
wears it at home. Praise be to Allah, we are now happy and we are
living a normal life and enjoying life. But we do not know what is the
ruling on my husband wearing women's clothes; is it halaal or haraam?
Please advise me, may Allah reward you.
Praise be to Allah.
Before we discuss the Islamic ruling on what your husband is doing,
itis essential to advise youto get treatment, because what you have
mentioned about liking other women and being provoked by them is a
psychological illness. Youshould not hesitate to seek treatment for it
andthere is nothing better than treating it by increasing your faith
and fear of Allah, and striving to overcome your nafs, whilst
constantly seeking refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan and his tricks,
traps, plots and whispers. There is nothing wrong with going to a
female psychologist who is trustworthy in terms of her religious
commitment and knowledge, to help you find a remedy for your illness.
With regard to what your husband is doing, itis undoubtedly haraam
because it is imitating women. This is like the one who says: Treat me
with that which was the cause of the disease.
It is narrated in saheeh reports that the Prophet (blessings and peace
of Allah be upon him) cursed men who imitate women, which includes
imitating them in their dress.
It was narrated that Ibn 'Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him)
cursed men who imitate women and women who imitate men.
Narrated by al-Bukhaari,5435
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him)
said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon
him) cursed men who wear women's clothing and women who wear
men'sclothing.
Narrated by Abu Dawood, 4098; classed assaheeh by an-Nawawi
inal-Majmoo', 4/469, and by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood
This sin is not excused bythe fact that this is done in privacy away
from where people can see it, because just by wearing women's clothing
he is incurring sin, even if he does that when he is alone.
The scholars of the Standing Committee were asked:
What does the shaykh say about one who wears women's clothing in private?
They replied:
It is narrated in a saheehreport that the Prophet (blessings and peace
of Allah be upon him) said: "May Allah curse women who imitate men and
men who imitate women." According to another version, "May Allah curse
effeminate men and masculinised women."
A man's wearing women's clothing is included in this prohibition. So
this action is forbidden even if it is done in privacy, because of the
general meaning of the text that prohibits it.
Shaykh 'Abd al-'Azeez ibn Baaz, Shaykh 'Abd al-'Azeez Aal
ash-Shaykh,Shaykh 'Abdullah ibn Ghadyaan, Shaykh Saalihal-Fawzaan,
Shaykh BakrAbu Zayd
Fataawa al-Lajnah ad-Daa'imah, 24/94, 95
What you have to do is hasten to seek treatmentfor the sickness that
you are suffering. What you are asking of your husband is contrary to
Islam and sound human nature, and it is not permissible for him to
respond to your request.He has to stop wearing women's clothing.
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